


Return To Sender

by Zeds_Dead_Reader (Zeds_Dead)



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Bickering, Confrontations, Emotional Sex, Eren and Jean are in denial, Eventual Smut, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Falling In Love, Feels, Flirting, Fluff, Happy Ending, Injury Recovery, Long-Distance Relationship, Love, Love Letters, Love Story, M/M, Mail Room AU, Medical Trauma, Minor Violence, Physical Therapy, Reader-Insert, Romance, Skype, Slow Build, Spa Day, care, eventual meeting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-31
Updated: 2017-04-09
Packaged: 2018-07-28 11:22:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 28
Words: 89,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7638151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zeds_Dead/pseuds/Zeds_Dead_Reader
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They said that love turned up when least expected, hiding round the corner to take you by surprise and steal the breath from your lungs. You'd never believed in such drivel, convinced life held nothing but short relationships which ended in disappointment, until an unannounced and old-fashioned incident made you think otherwise. </p><p>Maybe there was someone out there to claim your heart, hold it gently and take you to heights never before experienced. The only problem was that you had no idea who they were - all you had to go on was an address and some rather distinguished handwriting, words which managed to creep into your soul day by day and make the prospect of love very real.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Wrong Destination

**Author's Note:**

> Hello there! I'm at it again. Promised myself to leave this alone while I finish my others but the damn idea has been chewing away at me for a couple of weeks and demanded to be made real.
> 
> Fun fact - I work in a mail room so this has a little slice of my day to day existence!
> 
> Characters may be added, this is still very sketchy in my mind.

Envelopes whirred through the large machine, piercing noise high pitched and shrill as slicing blades did their job, opening up today's mail effortlessly as you watched the items slide from left to right, nudging the odd one that had strayed from it's intended route. Hundreds of letters passed through this place every week, maybe even thousands, most of them moaning and griping about something as consumers told the firm you worked for how shit they thought certain things were. Poisoned words were unleashed from their paper prisons, now open packages ready to scream and shout, demand compensation or some kind of retribution.

The contents didn't bother you, that wasn't a concern of yours - all you had to do was get the damn things out, scanned and filed. Someone else upstairs could deal with the whinging missives. The mail room was your kingdom, a cave of electronic devices that sat in the basement of a towering office building, ignored and dismissed by most of your alleged co-workers, but that suited you fine. Let them stress about the customers and how to solve their problems, you wanted no part of that. 

An early start meant you were always first in, prepping the workload for today before being joined by the other two who carried out this role by your side. Frequent laughs were had in this sanctuary, friendly banter and inappropriate stories shared and you enjoyed the men's company, probably more than they suffered each other's. They had a strange relationship, always at loggerheads and arguing over such little incidents but there remained an undercurrent of 'just kiss already', a fact you'd pointed out on many an occasion, much to their perhaps overly fervent dismay. 

The noise was at such a height that you were unaware of any other presence, person easily sneaking up behind you as they were masked by the sound of motors and fingers dug into your sides, causing a cry of shock and an instinctive spinning slap. Eyes wide, you gaped and raised a hand to your mouth, hiding the incoming laugh as a red cheeked male stood before you, green glare demanding to know what the fuck had just happened. You shouted to be heard over the mechanical squeals, palms up in a shrug. 

"Well Eren, if you're going to do shit like that, I'm going to defend myself! You could have been a fucking rapist!" Right on cue, the machine stopped, done with it's role for the day and your last two words rang through the room with harsh clarity, making you wince. "Is anyone else around?"

"No (F/N), just you, me and my sore fucking face!"

"Don't creep around then." Unloading the incoming mail, you moved it swiftly to the high benches, ready for sorting and scanning. "Where's Jean? He's late."

"How the hell should I know?" Eren tossed his backpack to the side, behind a normal sized desk that no one ever used and he added his dark blue hoodie to the pile, clothing lying over your own jumper as the temperature in here reached ridiculous heights at times. Chocolate hair was run through, locks perfected and he strode over, changing the date on his manual stamp and giving it a test on a random piece of paper. Satisfied he'd got the correct details, your friend and colleague grabbed a handful of envelopes, ready to start the motions, still stewing over why he'd have any idea where the third in your group was. "It's not like I follow him around."

"No, but you may have spoken? Texts perhaps? It's not unheard of, you know." 

"I've got nothing to say to that dick."

"Uh oh. Had a falling out?" Nudging the male, you watched for any sign of his weekend, sure they'd had some kind of spat since you last saw them on Friday.

"Shut up (F/N)." Rustling and the harsh sound of ink being imprinted by a metal item followed. You let him stew, saw the chewed lip and waited for incoming angst. "We just went for a drink after work, right?"

"Right?"

"And he started on about this course he's doing, how he'll get out of here soon, how he's better than this job." Another violent smash engraved today's date. "I know you're happy to stay in this place, but I have dreams and he's been bragging forever about his own."

"Why don't you do something about it then? Take those exams?"

"I'll probably fail." 

"Oh come on Eren, nothing ventured, nothing gained?" You didn't want him to leave, neither of them, but it was true that they had so much more to give and it was also true that you had no such desires. Locked away from everyone else, ruler of all you surveyed, at one with the industrial sized printers and such like - the anonymity allowed a simple life, one which you were grateful for after a more hectic past. They'd have to drag you kicking and screaming out of here, either that or you'd die where you stood, old and grey with papercuts and a stamp in hand. 

"Morning, fuckers!" Jean gave his standard greeting, strutting in with a spring to his step, belongings stashed beside the existing mound to create a larger pile. He flicked the radio on, tunes blaring out as he swept to his position on your left, woman a buffer between them. A small kiss was placed on your cheek, another usual occurrence and he grinned, arranging his space and good to go. "You want one too, Eren?"

"Piss off Jean. You can keep your dirty lips to yourself." Sighing, you slammed your hands on the counter, giving serious stares to them both. 

"It's Monday, not even 9am yet and you're at it already. Usually we get to Thursday at least before this starts. Please, let's lighten up yea? Get on with our jobs in a more friendly way?" You weren't the boss per se, but being here the longest gave you a kind of authority of both knowledge and longevity. Mumbled affirmatives allowed you to continue. "Right. Good. So, did you watch it?"

"Oh fuck yes, that was so awesome! That ending though. Thought I was gonna smash the TV set…" 

Conversing over last night's television was a safe bet, attention off the thorny subject of love/hate and the mood lifted, large printer in the corner bursting into life to provide you with the day's outgoing mail, letters regurgitated at a swift pace that would then be loaded into another mechanical beast, sealing the notes in pre-paid envelopes. If only someone could come up with a way to transport from A to B, you mused. Then your sole job would simply be to make sure the robots didn't rise up in rebellion. 

The three of you made light work of the incoming stacks, mostly all done by 10 and Jean fired up his scanner, loading documents as he bounced to the music. Eren had mellowed and took the identical station to the other male's right, light hearted discussions taking place and you smiled, giving your own steps side to side, keeping moving to ease aching feet. Opening one of your last items, you took the letter out and stamped it straight away before reading, cataloguing the day of arrival. When (e/c) orbs did trail over the words to see which virtual work queue to send it to, you took note of the neat writing, inked lines so perfect and uniform, a slight flourish to the script but nothing over the top. Slightly jealous of this person's ability, you frowned as it became apparent the paper had nothing to do with your company whatsoever, instructions on bills of laden and such like and you checked the envelope, business address on the back in that same flawless scribble. 

The front told you it had been delivered correctly, this building noted as it's destination however no name or entity was at the head, giving you no clue as to whether it belonged elsewhere on another floor. Placing it to the side, you intended to get it in the outgoing sacks tonight, send it back to the owner. 

By the end of the day you were exhausted, hair frizzy and soles throbbing, the dangers of being stood up for practically nine hours and working somewhere that required manual labour. Boxes of paper had been shifted around, large trolleys full of supplies moved and two machines fixed, all leaving you worn out and a bit dirty, toner dust splattered on your bare arms. Waving the others off, you ran a brush through the mess on your head and applied some perfume behind your ears, dabbing onto warm wrists also - you might be wearing jeans and an old tee, face red and limbs spotted in black ink but that didn't mean you couldn't smell nice for the trip home. 

You'd almost locked up before remembering the stray letter, poor thing having been taken to the wrong place and you quickly turned the computer back on, typing a swift accompanying document.

'To whom it may concern,

We received the enclosed at our offices, but believe it has been sent to us in error. We therefore return this to sender for their attention.

Yours faithfully,'

Leaving the contents at that, you printed on company paper, leaning your wrist on the page to sign your name in an unintelligible scrawl. The mail van had been and gone so you placed a regular stamp on the envelope, not wanting the errant note to be delayed any further and held it under your chin, keys securing the workplace and backpack swung over your shoulders. There was a box not far from here that you could drop the letter in, late collection from that point and as you lifted your arm, a faint whiff of scent reached your nose; you'd inadvertently imprinted perfume on the thing. Oh well, you thought whilst sliding it through the small slit. Someone will at least get a nice surprise in the morning. 

You pulled your jumper up round your neck, the beginnings of an autumnal breeze trying to pry it's way in. What had been a nice cooling wind not so long ago had turned to an icier offering, leaves ravaged and swirling in circles between the imposing office blocks, man-made edifices creating their own tunnels of blustery air. It returned your cheeks to normal colour at least and you felt a buzz, picking out your phone to see an invitation - Eren and Jean were in a nearby pool hall, shooting some balls over a beer and wanted the pleasure of your company. Fuck it. Yes, it was only Monday, but you could certainly do with some refreshment after the day you'd had. 

~~~~~~

Pale hands sifted through mail in a much smaller space than your grand set-up, tiny room containing just a desk and some shelves, not even a damn window to gaze from. An invoice was placed to one side, ready to be hand-delivered as this person's company consisted of around twenty employees, no point doing anything but taking the post to it's rightful owners. Adding another to the pile which would be expedited to the finance department (one singular man with a body odour problem), Levi sighed and picked up the last of his daily haul, miniscule work load meaning he'd spend most of the day reading or getting a rest and he adjusted his glasses, peering at the writing. So careless, he grumbled internally but paused, something delightful reaching his senses. 

Whoever had sent this had recently used perfume, strong enough to survive the overnight journey and he raised it to his face, breathing in deeply and savouring the aroma - fresh like dew and spring flowers, not sickly as some fragrances could be and he felt his soul lift slightly, transported to another place and time, away from this shoe box of an office and out into the invigorating air. Taking an ornate letter opener in hand, he sliced carefully and yet more of that wonderful smell poured out, nose eating it up until Levi realised he must look like some pervert chuffing away on a pair of used panties that had been secretly ordered online. Giving a little laugh at the thought, he gently pulled out two pages, one written in his own delicate hand, the other typed on professional foolscap and signed with an inexpensive pen. The sender had obviously pressed flesh onto the material when adding their squiggle. 

Grey eyes read the formal covering note, no emotion evident but that scent was intoxicating, turned his mood around and he made a decision. Why not? He sure as hell had fuck all else to do in this shit hole. 

~~~~~~

Thursday's delivery was less than any other day of the week, always the same dip in volumes which allowed the three of you to relax somewhat and you danced between the tall benches, stamping a line of paperwork which you'd laid out previously, every clunck in time with the beat. 

"Jean, your turn!"

The light haired man complied, scooping each one up in the same rhythm and sorting them into pigeon holes, singing along as he expertly stowed the documents in the correct queues ready to scan. 

"Butt munch?"

Eren didn't flinch at the terminology, just took up his part in your choreographed display with a wiggle of his hips, pressing buttons and sending an already stacked pile of letters through to become electronic images, spirited away onto someone's computer screen to do fuck knows what with. Routine complete, you set up the next round and switched places, all taking turns in the childish activity and while Jean stopped for a juice break, you took a look over the small mound of things the other's hadn't been sure what to do with, items always left for your trained eye to deal with. 

One shone out, inimitable writing familiar and you gave a confused chuckle, wondering how stupid one person could be to send stuff to the wrong place twice and after being told of their error. Shouts of glee came from behind as a new track started up, work forgotten as the men just free-styled in the middle of the room, a kind of dance off in force and you grinned, head shaken at how much these two went from wanting to kill one another to pulling off some badly executed moves together. 

The letter in your hand was returned to with a sigh, expecting to see another kind of shipping manifest but instead you held a page of beautiful ink, face burning up as the contents were absorbed. 

'To whom it certainly concerns,

We received your correspondence at our shitty little offices and believe that you smell absolutely divine. I therefore write to the author to say thank you for filling my pitiful dungeon of a work place with a ray of sunshine on an otherwise fucking awful day. 

Should you wish to return this to sender also, please be so kind as to rub yourself against your response again to allow me another satisfying morning.

Yours most sincerely,

The man who rather enjoyed opening the mail today.'

You were stuck between laughter and choking, unsure what to make of this but finding it ridiculously flattering as well as amusing, the guy's sense of humour right up your street - you could reply, you supposed. Add a bit of sparkle to the humdrum world of staples and grumpy messages. 

"What's that (F/N)?" 

Stuffing the paper into your pocket, you looked flustered and tried to hide it, smiling over at Eren.

"Oh nothing." 

But it was something. A simple thing that ultimately sent tingles into your heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feedback always graciously appreciated!
> 
> zedsdead1001.tumblr.com


	2. Developments

You'd taken the letter home, no fear of repercussions as the mail technically wasn't for your company, data protection the furthest thing from your thoughts. Reading over it again while you sat on the couch, a strange sensation crept over your skin, invaded deep inside and it gave you a probably stupid sense of excitement. One random note from fuck knows who had caused such a reaction, return address hundreds of miles away and the writer could be anyone, a sixty year old man or a horny teen. It didn't feel like that though, some odd certainty that this person might be quite the interesting find and you grabbed a pad, intent on doing this by hand to mirror the other's methods. Tapping a pen to your lips, you wondered what the hell you were actually going to write - coarse language was obviously ok, which was good. It came all too easily to suppress sufficiently. 

Ten minutes passed by and all you'd managed to achieve was 'To the man concerned with my perfume…' and even that sounded shit. Keeping it in style seemed the correct option though, it added that facet of humour which had gripped your attention in the first place. Clearing your mind, you tried to estimate a date for his second reply, knowing how your letter would have made it there the next day yet his took two to reach your office. Perhaps the mail system in his small town wasn't as evolved as your city network, able to receive but not send so swiftly. So if you posted this tomorrow, give and take for the weekend, Tuesday would be the very latest date that this person would get your response, meaning his part would follow by Thursday. If. If you posted it, if he replied, if the world didn't cause a flood or something to delay the vans. As much as your livelihood depended on this old version of corresponding, right now email sounded great. 

~~~~~~

Your suppositions had been incorrect, a damp and dreary Monday being the date that Levi's heart fluttered as he carefully picked up the envelope, scrawl much more guided and neat than the last one but he recognised it instantly, lifting his newest message to sniff. Smiling, the man placed it back down, senses filled with that summery flavour and he left your letter to one side, meaning to savour the thrill and prolong his excitement. It was a kind of sweet torture, turning to the other weekend mail instead and drawing out the moment of unveiling. 

He worked slowly as always, flick of the wrist cutting each and every package correctly as a small smirk remained on his lips, joy dancing in often matte orbs and transforming the male's stare to a melding pot of expression. It wouldn't take long to get through his work as usual, however the languid movements applied meant it could be an hour before he opened your reply, maybe more if he did his rounds first too. Teasing himself, Levi huffed a tiny laugh at his behaviour, a strange form of foreplay almost - skirting around the main event like finger tips circling flesh, never touching what begged to be stroked. 

"What the fuck am I doing?" Speaking into the silent office, he shook his head and began the first pile of paperwork, lithe digits securing multiple pages in a clip to ensure the whole bundle made it out complete. "She's probably just told me to piss off and stop being such a weird bastard." He was convinced you were female given the scent and before he could stop himself, the item was snatched up again, pure fields of petals causing his lids to flutter closed and take him on a journey, flown away from his shitty little coastal village and this godforsaken building. Outside might have been getting ravaged by a storm blown in from the sea but he wouldn't know, lack of windows preventing any type of reality so he sat back and imagined. Imagined grass and leaves, sun and warmth, a soothing breeze…"Fuck…" 

"Talking to yourself again, Levi?"

Upright in seconds, the flash of silver appeared before dwindling into a speck of white, real life hitting hard in the towering form of his manager. 

"I've got no one else to talk to so why the fuck not, Mike." Leaving it as a statement, the pale man regained himself and lifted his sharp, gleaming knife. "What brings you down into the depths of hell today?" 

"It's not that bad."

"Look around. What time is it? What season? How the fuck would I know? It could be midnight in April and I'd be none the wiser." Dramatically sweeping an arm around, your envelope still in his grasp, Levi motioned to his cramped quarters. "If it's not that bad, why don't you come and work down here?"

"It's the only place we can put you Levi. There's no room upstairs."

"Above ground, you mean? I'm already dead, aren't I? This is my grave, six foot under and…" 

"Oh, stop being so sullen all the time. This suits you just fine and you know it. If I had you up on the floors you'd murder someone within a week." Grinning from behind a mop of dirty blonde hair, Mike sat on the corner of his employee's desk, the creak denoting perhaps a new piece of furniture was needed soon. "And anyway, how could we enjoy our little games if we weren't hidden away?"

By games he meant poker, gambling for money when they should be working and supplementing their play with spirits and the odd cigar. Levi smirked, nodding slowly and resigned himself to a life of practical solitude. The large male sniffed, strangely trained nose picking up the whiff of a summer's day and he frowned. 

"Bit feminine for you, isn't it?"

"Hmm? Oh it's just on someone's letter they sent in."

"Well make sure it lands in my tray later Levi. Stinks of testosterone up there." Resisting the urge to snatch it back, the real recipient stiffened as his boss took the precious item from him, handling it without enough care and pressing his massive annoying nostrils onto the paper, soiling it's beauty. "Mmm, that's nice. Imagine having someone around the place that smelt like that every day? Enough to make you actually want to be here." Teeth were grit together, strange jealousy seeping from porcelain skin and envy got the better of him, message torn from a bigger grip in a slightly violent manner. 

"Leave my post alone, Mike. Go do your own job."

"Ok, bit touchy aren't we?" He stood, stretching muscles and lingering to soak up the bouquet of serenity. "On for a game later?"

"Got nothing better to fucking do."

"I'm honoured to feature so highly on your priority list. Catch you later." 

"That is if I haven't expired from boredom and a lack of human interaction." Grumbling loudly, Levi realised his theatrics were most likely falling on deaf ears and returned to his more uninspiring mail, sorting the small stash and keeping yours to one side as he continued to flirt with actually opening it. 

Across the country, you were in an entirely different kind of situation having had an absolute fuck ton of documents arrive this morning, large trolleys on wheels still mocking your lack of progress with their bulging sides - sometimes you really did think this place needed more than three of you to handle the volumes. Come mid-week it would slow down though, never a happy medium and you rushed around, cheeks pink and hair secured back as you threw answers towards your colleagues, random words in question responded to instantly with the correct conclusion. 

"Section 75?"

"Credit cards, Eren." He filed the piece in the right slot and picked up his next, everyone apparently hell bent on bringing him non-standard shit today. 

"Fuck me…alright, how about this. What the fuck is a DSAR?"

"Data access request. Is there a cheque attached?"

"Yup."

"Finance." And that was how you continued, trying to stop the enveloping machine from eating up letters and barking commands to those around you, building up a sweat and likely losing a few pounds in weight by the time lunch arrived. Fatigued but proud of a job well done, you left the guys to start scanning and went outside into gloriously chilled air, September this year mild and wonderful. 

At the same time as you basked in light drizzle, Levi finally returned from an exceedingly slow trip round the building, stairs taken with small steps and he sank into the comfortable leather chair, glasses on and your note in faintly trembling hands. He closed his eyes, peeling the sticky seal back and dispensing with his blade for once as fingers felt every piece of the gummed paper wallet, one sheet within which meant you'd either returned his original alone or simply sent your own. Begging for the latter, praying with everything in his being, the man unfolded it gently and eventually built up the courage to look. It wasn't his. 

Mercury flecked orbs devoured your now neater writing, noted the perfume smudge in the corner and he chuckled to himself, a surprising sound to be heard in his tomb as the contents were taken in once more. 

'To the man who hopefully enjoys opening the mail again,

I confirm receipt of your flattering letter at our cavernous building and sympathise with your lack of space. Our state of the art machinery takes your thanks graciously and I truly wish to bring you more warming rays on what may or may not be another fucking awful day. If it is, my apologies to you for having such bad luck and may I direct your attention to the lower right of this page, where I have most certainly rubbed a part of my body for your nasal pleasure. 

Should you desire to respond, please do so with your own gift as to be honest, I'm feeling a little left out here. 

Yours with deep sincerity, 

The woman who inappropriately nuzzled against a sheet of paper on Thursday.'

Picturing a faceless female cuddling up to his new prized possession made Levi feel a little bit wanted, heart softened by the image of a still unknown you rubbing her neck into white material. A drawer was opened and an expensive pad retrieved, response due immediately as he couldn't contain his glee any longer; you'd replied, probably on the same day and given the different postal mark, perhaps even at home and that fact caused a strange cartwheel of emotions to churn within his stomach. Shaking his head at the childish yet quite romantic sense of it all, he began to scribble swiftly, sudden urgency in his actions. 

Ink flowed and all thoughts of his despairing conditions faded, smile larger than maybe anyone here had ever seen in all his years of employment at this place as words sprung to mind, a rather cheeky collection that he hoped you'd appreciate - you certainly seemed to be his type of person. Finishing touches were applied with a smug smirk and Levi thought for barely a millisecond about what he was going to do, producing a shiny sticker with numbers and letters - no way was he about to make you wait any longer than required, special delivery called for in this instance and the male secured his label, one which proclaimed to guarantee that the recipient would have their package no later than 1pm tomorrow. Eyebrows may be raised at the expenditure, but no one was going to fucking check, they never did, just trusted him to get on with his monotonous job. This particular letter would be handed directly to the van driver this evening, importance stressed; maybe you'd even do the same at your end in return? 

Having no idea who specifically to address it to, he took your business details from the top of your note, sensibly having given that rather than your real abode's location and he came to a conclusion, adding a name which he was sure would catch your eye. 

~~~~~~

It caught Jean's eye in fact, his turn to deal with the items which had to be signed for and an unfamiliar moniker stared at him, surely a made up one and he brought it to you, pinched between wary fingers and nose scrunched up.

"Hey (F/N), who's this?"

"Hmm?"

"Madame Floral. Must be a joke. And it smells funny."

Taking it from your colleague, you recognised the script straight away and held in the need to blush, catching hints of cedarwood that sent you soaring into a forest, sultry tones that reminded you of safety and comfort. Above all else though it was manly, so fucking masculine that your ovaries may have screamed a tiny bit. 

"It doesn't smell funny, it's nice. I'll find a home for this."

"Rather you than me. It stinks of men." 

Laughing, you disguised anticipation with a shrill giggle and stowed the letter by your stack of randoms, barely able to contain the want to rip it open and stick your face in. Clearly you were somewhat deranged, you mused as no normal person would be getting so hot and flustered over an anonymous message; most humans wouldn't even have entertained this guy, just binned the silly thing but again that pull of distinct knowing held you tightly in it's grip, curiosity gnawing at your flesh.

The scheduled breaktime came around so slowly, your actions an opposite to the one who had corresponded with you, but of course that wasn't a fact you were privy to and you rushed the pair of workers out the door, wittering on about how they should go and take lunch together, have a laugh, get something good to eat. 

"You ok (F/N)? You look a bit clammy. And why are you trying to get rid of us?"

"I'm not Eren! I just want you two to relax, I can handle this on my own. Take your time."

"Yea, ok…" Uncertain, the brunette nonetheless took advantage of your blazé nature and nodded to Jean. "Up for it?"

"Damn straight. My back is killing me, can we go somewhere with nice soft seats?"

"You're such a woman, Jean. No offense (F/N)."

"None taken. Now go, get him a chair, chill."

Running before you could change your good mood, they fled with thanks and started to squabble over destinations, raised voices still reaching you as they left via the hallway. A slam let you know the men had gone and with a racing beat behind your ribs, the letter was ripped open, paper revealed and you read through it at least four times before being capable of correctly regulating your breath. 

'To the inappropriate nuzzler,

I don't find it inappropriate at all - actually, it seems to me that you might have quite liked the sensation, enough to do it again perhaps? Maybe a larger area next time? Thank you, I very much enjoyed opening the mail yesterday and return the favour to you with my own signature scent. We wouldn't want you being left out now, would we? 

My piss poor excuse for a working space doesn't know if your expansive office is bragging or simply trying to be smart but enough about them. Back to us.

If you would be so accommodating, I would rather like to get to know you better. Obviously I am blessedly aware of how fucking delicious you'd taste, however your latest response has piqued my mental interest also. 

Should you wish to learn more about me too, please be kind enough to take the time to read the footnotes. If this is to your liking, a speedy reply would be much appreciated as I am bored shitless here, the promise of seeing your improving handwriting the only thing keeping me from going insane. 

Yours in anticipation,

The man who may get fucking fired for using premium postage, but I regret nothing.' 

Underneath lay bullet points, facts about your new found playmate. 

' - early thirties  
\- has an adorable tendency to sulk at times  
\- well read  
\- lives in a shitty village where nothing ever happens. Ever  
\- expert in cutting people down verbally  
\- avid grumbler  
\- quite the catch…'

They all made you smile, his honesty around perhaps being slightly moody offset by the more confident last statement and you breathed in the aroma of a protective woodland scene, something you certainly wouldn't mind waking up next to every day. Startling yourself with that brazen admittance, you gulped and tried not to act like a desperate woman, fawning over an invisible person like you hadn't had human contact in years. Months maybe, but surely not enough to render you incapable of keeping it in your pants, so to speak. You checked the time, plenty remaining of the lunch hour so you took a pen in hand, using company paper without a second thought.


	3. Special Service

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I needed something light hearted in life right now :/

Perhaps sending your reply by courier was a little overboard, however as you passed the letter to the man in brown, a twinkle of excitement grew in your chest. You didn't know if this particular person would be delivering the note, but went for broke regardless.   
"Do you drive all that way?"

"Will be today, Miss. Few drop offs in that direction."

"How long does it take?"

"Well, after I've stopped at two other towns, this will be my third so maybe..." He screwed his face up in concentration. "Four hours?"

"Shit." Signing the paperwork, you knew that no one would question this, free reign given to dictate which items required special attention. "You have to come back again?"

"No, not tonight. I'll stay over there, find some crappy motel." The driver grinned, your receipt handed over as he winked. "Whoever gets this is in for a treat."

"Huh?"

"Nice perfume. Have a nice day, Miss."

"Thanks..." Tilting your head, you smiled strangely at the guy and watched him climb into his van, long journey ahead of him with your precious cargo on board. Four hours. It was nearly 2pm now so perhaps your correspondent wouldn't get it until tomorrow after all. You sighed, keeping everything crossed that the self proclaimed grump would still be in his office that late. 

"Hey (F/N)?"

"Yea?"

"Me and Jean are going back to that place after work, you wanna come? They do the most fucking amazing cheesy fries."

"I can tell, you've still got some stuck to your chin, Eren." Grinning bashfully, the tanned male wiped at the stringy substance and shrugged. Thinking about it, you could do with a distraction to take your mind off the delivery in progress and nodded. "Sure thing, I'm in. What beers do they have?"

"Oh everything (F/N). So many different ones it's unbelievable. We didn't have one at lunch, though…" You knew he had, but kept quiet - one didn't matter, any more and you'd send him home for fear of the man getting stuck in one of the machines, something that sadly had somehow happened before. "So, I'll go take these boxes up…"

"Just don't breathe on anyone Eren. Or eat a mint at least." His mouth gaped momentarily before he gave a small chuckle. There was no fooling you and he did as asked, popping some gum and trying to forget the time his clothing had become tangled in the shredder, a memory he'd rather not recall. 

"Yo Eren, where you going?"

"Taking these up to the floors. Courier deliveries, private and confidential." He loaded his trolley, back turned to Jean as the other man continued. 

"Can I come?"

"What? No! It doesn't take two of us, you idiot."

"Yea but there's that new guy in human resources. I want to ogle." Eren flushed, anger creeping into emerald discs and you stepped in to avoid a confrontation. 

"Jean? Ogle on your own time. Eren? Don't punch the new guy." Feet stormed off to the accompanying sound of squeaky wheels and you watched the shorter of the two disappear into the service corridor, headed for the elevator and hopefully an uneventful trip. You turned to the remaining member of staff, smug smile letting you know that Jean had enjoyed himself. "Why do you wind him up so badly?"

"Because it's fun, (F/N). Eren has no control over his temper and I like to exploit that fact." 

"Watch yourself, Jean. One day he won't forgive you." Leaving it on a warning, you busied yourself with the few odd bits that needed finishing prior to the main bulk of outgoing which had to be sorted, but not before you saw a flash of remorse on the light haired man's face. 

~~~~~~

Bourbon was poured as pale hands dealt the next round, small pile of cash on Levi's side and an even tinier one on Mike's, cigar smoke hanging thickly in the air. Most of the office had emptied out already, only the man on front gate duty remaining to provide security for some reason - no one in their right mind would want to break into a measly shipping company that dealt in boring trades. Tossing in money, the daily occupant of the room glanced at the clock, half five in the evening seemingly a fine time to start on hard liquor and poker. Unbeknownst to him, you were also drinking, granted a softer beverage but both unwinding and thinking of the other. 

Doubts had started to invade his brain; was he too bold? Maybe saying that you'd taste delicious had been a step over the line, or perhaps his offered information landed wrong. Either way, nerves were frayed and the strong liquid helped to calm him to a degree, sips taken as Levi tried to concentrate on the game, usually taking no prisoners when it came to gambling. 

"You're losing your touch."

"No I'm not. Fuck off Mike."

"Look? I actually have some winnings this time." Glancing up from behind floppy hair, the manager sighed at the tense human before him and he placed the cards down face-first, hands connected in a steeple as he leant over. "What is it Levi? I might be a bit of a cock sometimes but I'm still your friend."

"Pick them up and carry on."

"Eh?"

"Your cards." Staring blankly at his own impressive selection, the shorter man conveyed no emotion, only stony indifference. "We're playing, yes? So pick them up and…" An annoying beep filled the space, one usually only heard at the start of the day and the large figure straightened, frown barely visible beneath thick locks. 

"What the fuck is that?"

"Front gate. Hang on." Pissed at being disturbed mid-flow, Levi picked up the phone which had made the sound and gruffly answered, in no mood to deal with shit right now. "What?…Yes…No I wasn't but I'll come up." He stood, cards stuffed in his pocket as he certainly didn't trust the other not to look. "Delivery apparently. Probably the wrong address…" No. It couldn't be. Those last two words spoken now instantly made him think of you, his penpal from the city and with a twinge of anticipation, he bounded up the stairs, taking two at a time to reach ground level, door wrenched open and the main yard sprinted across. The guy on duty had an even worse working habitat than him, tight box barely large enough to sit down in but right now he couldn't care less for the guard, just fixed the person wearing brown with a serious stare. 

"Delivery for Sir Cedarwood? He said no one like that was here but you deal with the mail?"

"That's right. I'll sign for it." Chest ready to split and throw out his dangerously swift heart, Levi took the clipboard and signed, name messy and unintelligible due to the tremors of excited adrenaline. As he took the letter, an idea forced it's way into reality. "Did you pick this up?"

"Yes Sir."

"From the sender?"

"…yes?" Something in the stern man's features made the courier falter, piercing silver gaze surely trawling his memory banks for embarrassing stories or ways to blackmail him in the future. 

"What did they look like?"

"Who?"

"The sender." Speaking through gritted teeth, Levi did everything in his power to stop the fist by his side from smashing into this idiot's face, giving leeway and presuming he'd had a long day, one which would most likely end here in the backwater town, night falling quickly. 

"Oh, right. Well, she…" Thank fuck. "…had (h/c) hair, was wearing skinny jeans and a black tee, (e/c) eyes, nice smile…smelt good too."

"What else." Standing on one hip, the local to these parts kept it inside, struggling to prevent the incoming flurry of glee that had just filled his soul - this driver had met you, been in your presence and your correspondent basked in the second hand proximity. 

"Erm, I can't think of much. Only that she seemed friendly." Still feeling like he was being interrogated, the brown uniformed man shuffled and dreamt of a soft bed to flop down on, ease his aches and let tired eyes close finally but no, here he stood answering ridiculous questions. 

"Are you going back there tomorrow?"

"To the city, yea."

"Come by here first. I have something to send." Sensing reticence, Levi sized up the individual and struck a deal. "I can make it worth your while? How does twelve year old scotch sound?"

"Sounds like I'll be here at 9am sharp tomorrow morning, mate!" 

Priding himself at reading people well, the increasingly impatient male wanted to get stuck into his latest letter soon and pointed.

"Stay there, I'll be back in a minute." 

Mike watched with amused confusion as his friend sped through, unlocking a cabinet and retrieving the most expensive bottle, only to rush away again, leaving an unexpected trail of perfume in his wake. 

Back on the surface, Levi passed his sweetener over, recipient giving thanks and another promise to appear at the start of business hours. It meant the game downstairs would need to be cut short, time spent reading your reply and constructing his own so the dark haired man had to move fast, letter stuffed in the waistband of his trousers and black leather shoes beat a path to the office, weak excuse being formulated. 

"Something's come up. Rain check?"

"Something, Levi? Like drinking with the courier?"

"No. That was for a favour. Don't question the fucking postal system Mike. You're messing with things you couldn't possibly understand." 

"A brotherhood, hmm?"

"You'll never know."

They walked through sleepy streets, faint sheet of rain permeating their clothing as Levi's home was reached, small town offering little in the way of privacy - four people on their short trip had stopped to chat, adding to the anxiety in your latest acquaintance's gut. Everyone seemed to want to prevent him from your note and it caused nothing but aggravation, men lingering briefly at his house. 

"See you tomorrow. And Levi? Whoever she is, make sure I get to meet her. That smell is wonderful." 

Slamming the door in his companion's face, the resident smirked and moved to the kitchen, wine filling a glass and special letter revealed. Turning it over in delicate hands, he slid a finger under the sealed flap and opened slowly, not as drawn out as last time but still with reverence. Inside sat your folded missive, white item pulled out and with a deep intake of breath, Levi flicked it to full size, grey eyes dragging in each and every word desperately with something akin to starvation. 

'To the hopefully still employed man,

Being that I'm at work, options are limited so you'll have to make do with my wrist again. Hopefully this is satisfactory enough for your nose. On that subject, may I say that your gift was most pleasing, giving me that same awareness of how it would be to run my tongue all over you. 

I'll ignore any discussion on working quarters as quite frankly, only you interest me. 

Your personal facts were indeed to my liking and if this isn't a speedy reply, I don't know what is. I trust the courier found you without trouble and really do hope I've helped you in the search for sanity. 

To follow your lead, I give you my information. 

\- mid-ish twenties (that's as exact as I'm getting)  
\- enjoys own company but also that of intriguing people who write to me   
\- expert at fixing broken machinery  
\- not afraid to get dirty  
\- lives in a city where no one knows who you are and too much happens  
\- Queen of my mail room realm  
\- could be considered a catch, I'll let you decide

So, want more? You know what to do. Show me yours and I'll show you mine.

Yours with less anonymity,

(F/N)'

(F/N)...

"(F/N)." Trying it on for size, Levi spoke your name out loud and adored the sound that reverberated in his kitchen, a lovely tone and he scanned your response again, skin prickling as he imagined you licking his flesh as described. Gulping down the drink, he took his prize to the bedroom, low ceilings and exposed beams letting him know once more that he lived in an area stuck in the dark ages. Picking out his favourite stationery, he applied more cologne from the night stand and placed the paper to his neck, just as he pictured you doing the last time as the man tried to imbue his very essence into the sheet. 

Sitting on the mattress, Levi hunched over and leant on the hard back of his notepad, ink pen ready to go.   
Four hours drive away, you relaxed back but the nervous pool of worry sat heavily in your stomach, joining the admittedly delicious fries you'd just shared with the others. None of you were capable of much effort as grunted conversation was held, single words the order of the day.

"Nice."

"Mmm."

"Tired." 

"Fucked."

"Beer?"

"Yes."

Taking you up on the offer, the men smiled contentedly and watched as you carefully moved to the bar, money sourced and beers ordered as the solitude allowed some introversion. Had you been too slutty? A bit forward? Sure, he'd mentioned tasting you, but licking? Maybe too much, and then there was the courier…you must seem like a shameless needy woman. But still...this was fun, old fashioned flirting. People hooked up in less time without saying more than three words so this wasn't anything ground breaking. 

Feeling better about it all, you returned to your booth and smiled, Eren's head on Jean's shoulder as both of them snoozed, overcome by hard labour and too much rich food. You pulled your phone out, snap taken for use at a later date and slammed the bottles down, rousing the pair and pretending nothing had happened. Bleary eyes looked over in mild shock and they stretched, actions almost perfectly in tune and you presumed the afternoon had seen a reconciliation of sorts, any talk on the new guy from HR sorted and forgotten. 

"Fuck, what time is it?"

"Only seven Jean."

"Shit. I'm shattered (F/N). I think I need to leave after this." Chugging on the fizzy liquid, your other friend did the same with a nod, agreeing emphatically. 

"Me too. I could sleep for days."

"Hurry up then and we can share a cab."

"Ok, hang on. Give me a chance. Jesus, this guy..."

"Oh shut up Eren or I'll leave you behind."

"Yea right Jean, like you could ever leave me behind."

"I could." 

Grumbling without much force, the tallest of the two said no more and gave in to fatigue, sitting back and nudging the tanned male. A small elbowing match followed, no power in the actions and you smirked to yourself, wondering how long it would actually take for them to do something about the obvious feelings that ran beneath the surface. Easily said, you thought as the odd nature of your own infant relationship of 'fuck knows what' sat heavily on your mind. What would his reply be? Would he reply? You hoped so, the soulless metropolis made warmer by a person from such a different place, small town sounding so desirable. You'd been right to say you enjoyed your own company, comfortable crawling into your own brain but the companionship of someone else in a romantic sense was appealing, one other in this sea of people who knew nothing about their fellow humans, a singular being that you could be open with and let your identity shine through. 

The man you wrote to might despise his surroundings however after your previous job, it seemed like the ideal location for you. Neither Eren nor Jean knew what you used to do, any friends from that life rarely contacted and with no family, the duo here at the table were the only ones close to you now. Them and a certain distant individual who you couldn't stop thinking about.


	4. Uncovered

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am on a fic spree today...

The guys weren't talking to one another, speaking through you all afternoon and it was becoming tiring, conversation going past a neutral party. Whatever had happened after you'd left last night seemed catastrophic, thunderous glares on their faces as documents were treated to a harsh stamp every few seconds. Deciding to do something about this destructive behaviour without being obvious or short tempered, you spoke softly. 

"Eren, I need a hand with the paper. Jean, you got this?"

"Yup, sure thing. Have it done in no time."

"Thanks." Dragging the shorter and arguably angrier male through to the storage room, you pointed to some boxes, taking a seat on your own cardboard throne as a confused pair of green eyes glared from under low, dangerous brows. "Sit, Eren."

"Why?"

"You know why." Complying with a huff, the man rubbed his bare arms and got ready to take whatever you were going to say - stop squabbling, grow up, that kind of shit. So what you did come out with surprised him. "Are you happy?"

"Huh? Happy?"

"Yes. Are you?" Eren pondered this, saw how serious yet soft your (e/c) orbs were, a hint of sorrow in there too and he sighed, shaking his head whilst looking to the floor, tapping a stray paperclip with his sneaker. 

"I guess."

"I'm not having a dig at you here and I won't tell you what to do, but I'm worried."

"What about, (F/N)?"

"You. Jean. This." 

"There is no 'this'. I've told you before."

"So what is it then, because watching you two is like seeing a married couple on the verge of divorce. It's not healthy." 

"He's not healthy." 

Leaping up, you joined him on the stack of crates and held a caramel chin in your grip, tight but kind and made him lock eyes with you, pinning Eren down with what some once called your 'mother' stare. Grown men had crumbled beneath it before, been sent on their way with tails between their legs and it was the first time this particular person had endured such a treat. The brunette didn't know what to do, so opted for blushing deeply, determined to remain steady and he set his jaw in what was hopefully a defiant line. That all went to shit when you began to speak, voice low and purring but with an air of distinct power, one which could not be ignored. 

"Don't bullshit me Eren. No funny quips. No insults. No barriers. I've seen enough evidence of sadness and broken homes to last me a lifetime, so please…where are you at? Talk to me?" Swallowing hard, the male wondered what you'd witnessed but kept that for another time, just felt warmly trapped by your eyes. 

"I…um…shit." Incapable of anything but honesty, Eren started. "I don't really have anyone around, no parents and if someone gets close, I push them away."

"Why?"

"Because I'm afraid of losing them if I let someone in. I've lost everyone else." The sad truth broke your heart, stance relaxing and you released the hold on him, opting for a rare show of affection as you pulled him in for a hug. He reciprocated strongly and hid in (h/c) locks, your hand running in soothing circles across a dark tee. 

"You never know until you've tried, Eren. Sure, relationships don't always work out but some day, one will stick. Don't miss the opportunity to find that one because of fear. Every person we meet influences our lives, makes a mark and it's up to you to decide how lasting that mark is." 

"Did you used to be a couples counsellor or something?" Laughing lightly, you jabbed him in the side, breaking the embrace and smiling kindly. 

"Something like that, yea. Now. Let that guard down a bit, because Eren? You could be losing out on an amazing thing here." 

"Did you ever let yours down (F/N)?" He'd never seen you with anyone, you never spoke about anyone, past and personal life kept private yet an aura of knowing had accompanied your speech. Sadness adorned your features, a wistful expression now setting in and you nodded. This was an open conversation.

"Once or twice. Didn't get me very far but I learnt a lot. And hey, who says I don't have someone special right now?"

"Do you?"

"Maybe." Grinning, you recalled the hasty call to the courier company yesterday and felt rejuvenated. "Let's just say that I'm exploring an avenue, Eren. One which may end up coming to nothing, but I have to give it a try. And so should you."

"Yea ok, turn it back on me again." Griping without any energy, Eren gave a manly punch to your shoulder, unsure what else to do and a call came from the adjoining space.

"(F/N)? Delivery!"

"Thanks Jean!" Shouting through, you stood and gave another stare full of meaning, nothing verbal needed as you rushed away, making for the back door and whatever had been sent your way this time. The man from yesterday was there, clipboard in hand and a purple envelope which was thick and expensive looking. He passed it over as you signed, an almost frustrated look thrown in your direction. 

"I'm not going back that way today, Miss."

"Hmm?"

"Your friend. He got me to bring this but I'm afraid I'm not doing that drive again, no matter what you bribe me with." 

"Bribe?"

"That guy gave me some rather expensive scotch but I can't make the trip so soon, I'm knackered." So he'd bribed the courier? That desperate to have you see his reply? This was good. Really good, and you laughed.

"Don't worry, I'll find another way."

"Pigeon? Airplane? Honestly, it's kind of sweet but I don't have it in me."

"Sweet?"

"Well yea, he nearly killed me with those eyes just to find out what you looked like." Shit. You hadn't even considered that and held back the need to grab his brown shirt. 

"What did HE look like?"

"Oh christ…ok, remind me never to pick up your jobs ever again." The man rubbed his forehead, laughing at the childish romanticism and shrugged, holding a hand out. "About this tall, blackest hair I've ever seen round his face." Fingers trailed in a curtain motion, onyx frame vivid in your mind. "Morose, intense, pale and that's about all I got. If you'd told me before, I'd have taken a picture." Fuck, that would've been a good idea, you thought and turned the envelope round in your grasp. 

"Thank you. It's not a bribe, but can I give you something for your time?"

"No no, all part of the service apparently." Waving, the weary traveller climbed aboard his postal chariot and sped away before you could jump him with a return request. Your new mail was thicker than should be, perhaps due to the costly stationery and that hint of manly confidence drifted up, cologne not a standard off-the-shelf brand that you knew of. Back inside, the men were chatting lightly by the scanners, Eren's body language more relaxed as he leant inwards slightly, smile on his face and a light brush to the other's arm made your own grin expand. They seemed fine there so you slid in behind the desk that no one used, belongings shoved to one side as a temporary privacy barrier and you carefully picked back the sealed triangular flap, finger running over the sticky line which would have been licked by the author. It was hard to focus on anything but that for a moment, mind then trying to piece together a mental picture of his appearance, the dark hair, milky skin…

Physically shaking the daydream away, you opened the paper pouch and took out his letter, exquisite material that was made for calligraphy pens and something fell, harder substance making a clicking sound as it hit the linoleum floor. A shiny surface stared up at you, blank and rectangular, unmistakable - a photograph. With unsteady hands, you retrieved the item and turned it over slowly, (e/c) eyes widening as you lost the ability to keep an exclamation in.

"Holy shit!" 

Two people turned instinctively, a caramel fist raised as neither of them had sufficiently noticed you coming back from receiving the delivery, males convinced the driver had perhaps made an inappropriate move. What they didn't expect was your flushed face and open mouth, giant orbs gazing down at something. 

"(F/N)? You ok?"

Looking up as if you'd been caught watching porn, you stammered a reply. 

"Y-yea fine, fine. It's nothing. Ignore me." You heard a quiet conversation and some giggles, obviously at your expense but you didn't care; before your stare sat the image of pure seduction, snap taken presumably last night as your penpal held the half written letter now fully in your possession as if to prove it was really him, like someone would present a newspaper to confirm a date and year. A casual tee was visible, dark and well cared for and the way his flesh glowed with moonlight tones was incredible, low lamp providing exemplary shadowing across amazing cheek bones. The hair was as described but much more incredible in reality, flawless sheets of coal sitting in stark contrast to the white skin. 

But the eyes…they gripped you instantly, silver shards gleaming from beneath black lashes which any woman would be jealous of, feathery offerings that perfectly lined those sparkling pools. His almost lazy lids screamed superiority and class, a man surely imbued with certainty and self assurance and then came the lips, a hint of a smirk on that delicious looking pout…

Stashing the snap in your pocket to study again later, the writing was turned to and you read the lengthy note intently, absorbing the words as if they were a meal given to a starving human. 

'Dear (F/N),

It sounds good to say your name. At least now I have something to go on other than 'nuzzler.' I'll be honest, as much as the polite back and forth has amused and excited me, I'd like to suggest dispensing with the formalities and just talk to you like a normal person would. 

So, with that in mind, thank you for the exceedingly swift delivery. Your courier was a kind enough fellow, if a little sweaty, but well played (F/N). I was not expecting that. Hopefully the loss of my alcohol has not been in vain and you get this tomorrow, otherwise I'll be needing the details of that company so I can tear him a new asshole. 

Anyway, I digress. Hello (F/N), my name is Levi. Nice to meet you. It's always good to be acquainted when discussing tongues, and on that subject, fact number four certainly seems true - how dirty are you prepared to get, though? I'd be interested to explore that further. 

Thank you for the information and in the spirit of sharing, I hope you like my newest gift. I'm not a 'selfie' fan but at ten in the evening, my options were limited so you'll have to make do with my sketchy angle. Also, my fucking printer is running out of ink so I look more vampiric than usual. 

The courier gave me what could only be described as a shit account of you, so if you're up for it, I've shown you mine…

I'm still employed unfortunately, I swear they are trying to beat me down day by day until I snap and go on some murdering spree. Maybe the population needs controlling or something, I don't fucking know but seriously (F/N), please never stop writing because now I know there's still a world out there. 

Ok that sounded awfully clingy. I blame the wine. And my ability to be so goddamn negative. 

I'd better stop now before I make a total dick out of myself. The urge to write page after page is strong but for your benefit, I will resist that and let you decide if a potential serial killer who rambles is the kind of person you'd like to converse with. 

(F/N), it remains a pleasure and I hope that this letter finds you well.

Yours,

Levi'

There was a small doodle underneath, what looked like a blobby feline and you laughed quietly, shaking your head at the attempt to draw something. This had painted him, no, Levi in a new light, the excuses for why the photo wasn't to his liking, passing off what you found to be an adorable outpouring as the ramblings of a mad man; maybe he wasn't so confident after all, inwardly nervous like you were. It warmed you to him even more, a real person with real emotion, not some robotic jerk who smashed through life without a care. 

Keeping hands off the picture in your pocket, you instead wondered how to get your reply to him quickly and efficiently, the option of another courier still available - there were hundreds of them in the city but you'd probably have to use your own money now, repeat orders bound to be picked up by the pattern and frequency. But that was ok, you had expendable income and didn't exactly go on wild shopping trips or buy fancy champagne on a night out. The computer was switched on as you tried to think of how to get some time alone to construct a response, no way you could do it here. Work loads were sparse so there was opportunity to disappear, the pair of colleagues getting on like a house on fire so you stood, grabbing a pen and some scrap paper instead, not exactly Levi's style but it was all you had to hand and it was better than typing.

"Hey guys? Sorry but I need to take care of something personal, do you mind if I skip out for a bit?"

"Sure (F/N), we've pretty much finished this anyway. Everything ok?"

"Thanks Jean, yes just have to get this done urgently." You hadn't lied, just not elaborated fully on the truth and you flew out the back door, running over to a nearby coffee shop, order given swiftly. One of the many free tables was taken, your surface prepared as you ensured no bits of food or splashes of drink would soil the note. Scribbling as if it were your last day on earth, words flew out in messy lines, any attempt to keep precise now but a memory as a hasty yet comprehensive reply was penned, one eye on the time. Surely it would be too late to reach Levi today. 

Vaguely happy with the content, you read over it some more until finally accepting what you'd produced was alright. Now came the tricky matter of a picture. Using the café's bathroom, you sorted your hair and made sure there was no stray ink or muck on your skin, eliminating the signs of a physical day's work - it would have to do. Letter in hand, you stretched your arm out to take the first of what turned out to be 37 photos, not satisfied with any of them; Levi was hot. Like model hot. This snap had to be worthy of that kind of higher echelon, however each shot had something wrong. As the minutes ticked by, you realised the chances of him receiving your missive were slim to none and this procrastinating wasn't helping, hindering your progress and delaying things even more. 

With a huff, you looked into the mechanical eye of your phone, slightly distressed and a resigned expression in place. Click. Sighing, you checked the screen and saw what had actually come out as a rather sultry pout, totally unintentional and laced with an air of mystique. Well, wasn't it funny how you got what you wanted when you didn't even try? You allowed yourself a small giggle, belongings gathered and workplace made for, colour printer in for a different kind of job today. 

Cables had been connected and your chosen picture sent to the machine, large paper image the only thing at your disposal, no photographic materials like Levi's to use and you stuffed the envelope carefully, making sure to pass it between your wrists and transfer some of your recently applied perfume - presumably he still wanted that gift too. 

A delivery company was called with urgency, instructions given to the different courier and his estimation was that your item would likely be dropped off at the local sorting depot, ticket left with the recipient's office to inform them they had a package to collect in the morning. It was the best you could hope for, not as speedy as yesterday but still, tomorrow would come around all too soon.


	5. Contemporary Methods

Seven in the evening came and went and still no word - no delivery, no call from the front gate, nothing. Suffering from a bout of self questioning introversion, Levi tapped his finger tips on the rim of a glass, loose hold around the top as the receptacle sat safely on a wooden surface. Perhaps he'd seemed too needy, too overly keen to strike up some kind of correspondence chain, too goddamn weird. Or maybe his picture had put you off - sure, he wasn't exactly bad looking, however not everyone liked the same kind of things, each person's aesthetic markers set at all different levels. It could just be one of those things, he mused as liquor was sipped from that same lazy grip, warming fluid settling in his stomach and readying the man for the walk home in what he imagined may be another pisser of a storm. 

Even if you had been so inclined as to expedite a response again, it might've been placed to one side given the time, executive decision made by the courier and delaying his new reason to enjoy waking in the morning. Levi wasn't an individual prone to depression or darkness, so to say he struggled to get out of bed each day didn't point towards troubles necessarily, it was just out of pure apathy; rise, work, sleep, repeat. Occasionally someone would catch his eye, provide some break in the monotony but it was always the same - not enough. Whatever was going on here between the pair of you seemed innocent yet borderline, the ancient methods providing an almost Victorian sense of correctness whilst some of the content strolled into more risqué territory, a combination which he found immensely intriguing. He'd never thought in a million years that his initial letter would've been replied to, let alone continued into others so to expect a further note…that might be wishful thinking. 

Finishing off the remaining drink, Levi sighed and grabbed his keys, ready for the journey back into an empty home, a place which would be filled with nothing but the ticks of his grandfather clock, an antique that suited his house and this whole area; old, weathered, but still functional for now. He pulled a jacket on and flicked off the lights, plunged into darkness as the man ascended, no bulbs needed as he knew this route well, room both his prison and comfort for quite some time. Whilst the grumbles sounded like he hated everything in his life, the truth would perhaps surprise some people, reason for living here more deep than just originally hailing from this area. 

The rain beat down sideways, wind creating a horizontal torrent that soaked him instantly, shoes deftly avoiding puddles as the large lamps of the front yard illuminated watery pools, shimmering ripples rather hypnotic. Along with the sound of a storm was an unforgettable noise, black night too thick to show the source from this angle but it was inimitable - waves crashing on stone, ravaging a small beach, smashing into docks that had stood the test of time. The sea was as destructive as it was beautiful, a powerful force that had provided this town with it's livelihood for centuries. It used to be fish, smuggled goods, treats from far away lands…and now, as Levi made no hurry to reach the gate, it was fucking boring ass imports, all coming through him in paper form as the physical items remained in their steely containers, ready to be loaded onto trucks and taken to larger settlements. 

Nodding to the security guard, the threshold was almost breached when two lights came close, wipers swishing furiously at a windscreen and the van screeched to a stop, tyres slipping on wet concrete. Unprepared to step out into the deluge, the driver cracked a window and yelled. 

"Delivery for Levi?"

"Yes!" Raising an arm, the pale man showed his identity and rushed over, transaction taking place through a tiny space of a slightly open door, envelope already wrapped in plastic to protect it from the elements. Shoving it under his clothing to provide more care, Levi thanked the rather fraught looking courier and waited for him to speed away, steps now taken with urgency. 

Cursing the need to get dried first, he peeled off cold, damp fabric, items tossed straight into the washer and a comfortable towelled robe was wrapped around his shivering body, hair rubbed in a perfunctory manner to avoid excess drips. Fire stoked, wine poured, he eventually came to a place where he could sit and savour your latest offering, that same smell reaching a freezing nose. 

"Probably get fucking ill now. Fantastic." 

Opening the paper container, his mumble was so half-hearted that it barely didn't exist, smile on cool lips as what was revealed spread warmth to his entire being, eliminated any thoughts on sickness and Levi leant back into his couch, breath pushed from his lungs in a huff of appreciation. 

"She's beautiful…" Speaking quietly, silver eyes absorbed the picture, his gaze softening as he noted every single thing about you - the small cute frown which had obviously come from trying to get the right shot, slight pout that spoke of your photographic struggle, amazing (e/c) discs that sent him into a trance. Despite the exasperation that was evident on some features, that stare was most certainly alive, a colour he could dive into and stay submerged within for eternity. Utterly gorgeous. Placing your likeness down carefully on the coffee table, Levi kept glancing over as he unfolded the letter, tiny laugh given at the messy scrawl which took him back to that first arrival, your hasty scribbles done not through lack of attention, but total desperation to get the words out. 

'Dear Levi,

Likewise, it's great to know who I'm speaking to. And now we both have faces to put to the names and can I say, you look absolutely incredible. I mean that sincerely. I can't even structure a sentence to do your picture justice so I won't embarrass myself by trying.  
The courier did indeed turn up as promised, so no assholes need to be torn and I hope my reply is worth the bribery. I'll have to use another company this time as our last friend declared that he most certainly wouldn't be doing the drive again, so at least you won't have to suffer his body odour. 

Nice to meet you too, Levi and as for fact number four, it all depends on what I'm getting dirty with, or more correctly, who. I'm open to exploring that further too, however it is a little difficult in this format. 

And rest assured, there is nothing wrong with your photo, nothing at all, so please don't think you need to subtitle it with reasons as to why it isn't satisfactory. 

I might be out of line here, but why do you carry on doing something you don't like in a place you don't like? It obviously causes you a kind of pain to be there, maybe a change in scenery and profession would help? Or if you'd prefer, I am a trained listener so please feel free to use me as a punch bag. 

And it didn't sound clingy, it was quite sweet. I am out here in the big bad world and to be honest, I would rather be in a tiny village like you, away from crowds and noise. 

Potential serial killers are my thing so you're in luck, keep it coming. When you do go on the rampage, be sure to let me know so I can watch it on the news, I'd rather like to see you in action, all covered in blood and demonic…that's a bit creepy, sorry. But still strangely attractive…

Your letter did find me well and thank you for the equally speedy delivery. But, as kind of alluded to before, this is a fast world and sometimes that requires fast results. I'm not sure if you'd be interested, but I've added something at the bottom should you wish to use it. 

Yours with excitement for the next reply, by whatever means,

(F/N)

P.S. Forgive the constipated look in my picture. Selfies are not my forté either. 

P.P.S….'

Levi saw the series of digits staring up at him in an inviting manner and his palms became clammy at the sight of your details, phone number emblazoned on the cheap paper and he looked over at the photo, imagining what your voice sounded like; sweet and soft? Husky and seductive? What noises could he make you emit? 

"Stop it. Fucking idiot. She'll get fed up of your shit soon." It didn't mean he ceased the instinctive act, hand reaching out for his device without being able to resist it and he opened the screen, blank message ready to receive his input. 

As you sat at home sipping on beer, the television lit your front room, all other bulbs out to create a warming atmosphere in contrast to the growing set of clouds outside. The window of your apartment showed a dark slice of weather that seemed to be slowly creeping up on you like a predator, ready to pounce and cause fear, destruction, death. The horror movie on screen probably added to this odd morose feeling you had, a sense of stupidity having entered your mind earlier. You had no idea what you were doing, swapping pictures and phone numbers with a stranger, talking about being dirty and daydreaming of the things you'd like to do to the man in the photo you held loosely in one hand. 

It wasn't crazy behaviour really, although you did worry that you'd become slightly too attached to an unknown individual already, heart open and prone to being hurt. Every relationship you'd been in went the same way - you acted with enthusiasm, they didn't match your expectations in that regard and it ended. Were you maybe too over-bearing? A little manic when it came to partners? Perhaps. Or it could be that you hadn't met the right person yet, previous lovers not ready for any commitment and god knew you'd seen how unhappy couplings could turn out. 

Sighing, you swigged at liquid and tried to concentrate on the film, eyes slightly closed to fend off any potential frights and just as the actor turned a corner to be faced with ultimate terror, your phone chirped. 

"Fuck!"

Jumping out of your skin, you snatched up the offending item and scowled, expecting Eren or Jean but no, this was an unfamiliar set of numbers. You opened the text, words dancing before your eyes as any of the uncertainty crumbled away yet again.

'Just so you know (F/N), you still have to mail me until someone invents the technology to send scent via SMS.'

'Oh I will, but now I don't have to face a heart attack every time I try to make the courier deadline just to speak with you.'

'True. So…I look absolutely incredible, hmm?' 

Blushing, you muted the television, blood curdling screams turned to nothing as full attention was pointed towards the conversation, one held in real-time and you curled up on the couch to get comfy. 

'Good enough to eat, Levi.'

'Hungry?' Levi scratched at his chin absent mindedly, wondering exactly when he'd decided to become this person. Your first letter certainly had something to do with it, a kind of inner beast unleashed and let out to play, and why the fuck not. Fun was something he rarely made friends with. But did he really want to turn this into pure filth? No, he did not. That would betray the innocence. 'Sorry ignore me. Anyway, what do you want to be in a piece of shit town like this for?'

'I'm peckish.' Kind of glad it hadn't gone straight down the route of innuendo, you continued. 'It's too busy here. I need a simple life.'

'Well you'd get one, that's for fucking sure. We even have village fairs and shit. All very quaint.'

'It sounds lovely.'

'I suppose it can be (F/N), it can be.' 

Either you were confused, or he was. 

'Do you actually secretly like it there, Levi?'

He considered your query, one which he often asked himself and the truth was delivered. 

'I piss and moan about it but yes, I think I do. Everyone knows me but at the same time, they don't.'

Intrigued, you sat up and typed quickly, surprised at how deep this was getting already - much better than waiting for someone to deliver a note. 

'You don't have to explain that if you don't want to, but I'd be very interested to hear your story one day.'

'Yes, one day.' Levi didn't have a dark past in the slightest, but felt tapping on a screen was not the right medium. 'What about yours? Why do you crave a simple/mind numbingly boring life?'

'Maybe that's for another day too.' 

An unspoken agreement was made, promises given to revisit this - it was too heavy for the first messaging event, and you both knew it. It went quiet, a pair of people miles apart sitting contemplating where to go next. The instant gratification of this communication method was most desirable, but one you weren't used to together yet. Rising, you retrieved another beer and flopped back down, light blinking to let you know that Levi had come up with a flash of inspiration. 

'Shitty fucking storm here, practically washed me into the sea on the walk home. I think it's coming your way (F/N), and if so, batten down your hatches. I wouldn't want you getting swept away.'

'Can you see the waves from your house?' 

'Yes.' A few seconds later and a dark, gloomy snap came through, ocean barely discernable but it was clear that the only thing between your new friend and the sea was a road and an expanse of pebbly beach.

'Holy fuck Levi, that must be beautiful in the summer.'

'Mmm you'd think. Stinks of fucking fish when it gets too hot outside.' You laughed, amused by his endearing gripes which made such a refreshing difference to the usual safe small talk. Levi closed his window again, keeping the rain at bay and he ruffled his hair in the towel again, locks almost dried as he saw a picture waiting to be opened, wet droplets on his screen swiped off and what he presumed was your view sat before grey eyes. A city he was acquainted with sprawled out on the pixelated offering, new buildings dotted around as the area was still remarkably undergoing expansion, the only part of the place that had any room left. Cranes were visible, new apartment blocks rising to the heavens in glassy splendour, reflections of street lights and the moon on shiny surfaces. Breathing in slowly, Levi recalled the smells and relived the sounds that he used to call his everyday backdrop; traffic, car horns, sirens, people…ah yes, the people. One thing he didn't miss. Seemed you had quite a bit in common. 

'This doesn't stink of fish, just cheap fried food and gasoline.'

'Oh I remember it well (F/N).'

'For another day?'

'Another day.' Smiling, the man shook his head at how you'd picked up on the connection with his reason for residing where he did, drawn in further by your astute characteristics. 'You said you were a trained listener. I believe it.'

'When I say trained, I mean forced.'

'Ah, we'll file that under 'another day' too. I can also be quite the therapist.' 

You'd spoken for nearly three hours, sharing random stories and mutual annoyances, finding much to chat about on the subject of the postal system. To many it would seem dull, however given your roles, it was natural. Eventually fatigue kicked in and you'd sent your farewells electronically, grateful to be able to do so instead of holding air in your lungs with anticipation. 

'Night Levi. Sweet dreams. And remember, it's your turn next but regular mail will be fine.'

'Goodnight (F/N). I will endeavour to have something for you soon.'

'Oh, maybe another drawing?!' You'd forgotten all about his deformed cat and giggled, imagining him glaring at the cheeky text. 'That last one blew my mind.'

'Oi. Enough of the sarcasm. My kitten has melted fucking hearts the world over.' 

'I'm sure. Next time, maybe make it less like road kill?'

'GOODNIGHT (F/N).' He finished with a frowny face, emoticon appearing to be so out of character and it made you chuckle even more, sending your own one that had a tongue sticking out. 

You went to bed that night with a contented soul, a smile on your face and the phone on charge, battery having been destroyed by extensive messaging. It had been a bit of a gamble suggesting the new way to communicate, one which had paid off - you hadn't been sure if the old method was ready to be left behind yet, pushed to the sidelines in place of the more modern one, yet it had gone down well. 

Levi pulled the covers up tight, cold bedroom still thawing out and he checked the notification bar again, just in case you'd sent another text. Nothing showed but that was fine, you'd given your goodbyes and could commence this again in the morning. Also, the subject of another delivery had to be mulled over - personal facts and figures had a new home to be shared in, however the archaic process of expectantly waiting for mail still entranced him so the man would find something to keep it alive. Additionally, it could at times be much easier to get things said in a one sided conversation. Giving your picture a last look, Levi smirked at the romantic mess he'd morphed into and closed his eyes, plan already forming in his mind.


	6. Face To Face

The atmosphere at work had been serene, no squabbles or biting words, no sharp tongues and as Friday morning's slump hit, the lack of mail and shitty weather created the need to become childish, all of today's jobs complete by 11am. Boxes had been set up in perfect position, a kind of obstacle course erected and Eren took his turn, long card tube used as a kind of hockey stick as he guided the ball of elastic bands through the track. 

"I'm gonna score this time…just you watch…" The man bit his lip in concentration, green eyes narrowed and body hunched, all the while cheered on as he approached the small goal, bin turned on it's side and the brunette went for the kill, strong arms wound back and he smashed the rubbery item, hollow thud from the makeshift tool the only sound as you and Jean held your breaths, watching in slow motion as the back door opened, delivery driver allowed entry by a security guard at the exact wrong moment. Eren's shot was well off target, inches too high and the ball hit the newcomer square in the stomach, powerful blast causing a huff of discomfort. 

"Oh fuck…I'm so sorry!" The culprit rushed over, patting the guy in apology and making sure he hadn't come to any harm, scared gaze from the courier begging you to help as Jean giggled. 

"Eren! Leave the poor man alone!" He jumped back, hands up in shock at his own actions. 

"Sorry (F/N)…" Sloping off, he joined the other male and grumbled some inaudible words, likely having the piss taken out of him by his friend. You shook your head, trying to placate the mail man who simply thrust a padded parcel into your hand and walked off, comments around inappropriate use of work equipment spilling from his mouth. The package rattled when shook and you knew who it was from, constant texts shared since that first day and Levi had promised you a delivery, one which had indeed been sent by normal means. Shaking the pouch, you wondered what was inside and pulled your phone out, an ever-present thing in your hand at the moment. 

'Got it. I won't open it yet though. God knows what you've put in here.'

'It won't bite, (F/N). Just keep it well fed and you'll be ok.'

'What the fuck is it?'

'Wait and see. Did that storm get to you yet?'

'Yup. It certainly did Levi. Pissing down.'

'Well at least it's not here anymore. Actually quite clement.'

'Good for you, ass. Stop being so smug.'

'Who was smug yesterday with their ability to get any kind of food at any fucking time of night? You know full well we don't have that sort of thing round these parts, (F/N).'

'These parts?! Are you a proper farmer or something?' Actually, you'd love to hear his accent, find out what kind of tone came from those inviting lips and you quickly typed before losing your nerve. 'Can I call you tonight?'

"(F/N)? Are you ever off that thing?"

"Sorry Jean, just chatting."

"He must be worth it, you haven't put your phone down in days." Grinning, you just shrugged and looked down, waiting for a reply that hadn't materialised yet. Shit. Maybe that was too much. 

An hour went by and nothing happened, frequent checks made but no little symbol to announce any messages so you gave in, faced the elements and ran out to get some lunch. Despite the torrential rain, something made you stop and stand in the middle of the downpour, people rushing past your still form and splashing through puddles, shrieks given by fleeing pedestrians but you didn't move, steady figure getting increasingly soaked and you looked up, eyes closed as the storm which had fallen on Levi recently beat down on your face, another thing shared second hand. You started to laugh, both at yourself and the strange sensation of calm, allowing the wind to pull at your clothes, coat doing nothing to protect against the raging tempest. This is what he had felt, the same cold and biting water that made you more alive than ever before. 

Each droplet was recognised, the tap of liquid on your exposed skin like morse code and starkly evident as the blustery weather lit up your soul. The moment of unusual serenity was broken by your pocket buzzing and you darted underneath a café's awning, hiding now with a dopey grin which grew larger when you saw an incoming call. Levi was phoning you. Now. Right here. Anxiety levels as high as your adrenaline, you pressed the green button and raised your arm, voice coming out in a faint whisper

"Hey."

The man on the other end was dry and warm, sitting in his chair and he leant back, lids shut and he gave a small chuckle at how mild you sounded. 

"Hey (F/N). Sorry for the delay, I actually had to do some fucking work." 

Deep yet not threatening, the silky drawl made you literally shiver, body shaking and heart speeding inside of you. He could cause world peace with that tone, the expletive so at home from his mouth that it didn't even sound offensive, a faint hint of a grumble evident which matched his written correspondence. 

"That's ok, not your fault they expect you to be productive." He sensed the tremor of coldness in your words, heard thunderous raps and frowned. 

"Where are you?" Your next giggle almost finished him off, man now slumped in his seat as he wondered just how one person could make such an adorable sound. 

"I'm in your storm, Levi." To see his name penned was one thing, to have it delivered into his ear another - surely he could die happy now and he smiled, gesture audible when he next spoke. 

"My storm?"

"Yea, you sent it this way and I guess…I dunno, it's stupid." You didn't need to say anymore, he understood. 

"It's not stupid." Pausing, the silence wasn't uncomfortable, two people so far apart enjoying what company they could grasp and connecting over pelts of rain, breaths vaguely discernable down receivers. In danger of staying like this forever, Levi straightened with a cough, breaking your spell also with a change of subject. "You getting lunch?"

"Y-yea I should really…" Still in a daze, you looked around for what was in reach without having to swim there, a few old favourites close by. "Might go to that Indian place."

"Oh fuck off…" 

Knowing you'd be winding him up with the selection on offer, you grinned and decided to up the game. 

"I'll call you back in a sec." You ended the call, hurrying over as the relevant store was entered, water dripping from you in sheets and creating a pool on the floor. Flapping to rid yourself of more moisture, you felt decidedly dog-like and pressed a different button on your phone, new kind of communication style in use and you held the screen by your ear but pointing it towards the busy kitchen and serving area, digitally sending a live stream to Levi. "Bring back memories?" 

Silver eyes stared intently, your voice distorted by the distance and noise of a loud establishment, sounds of crockery and shouted orders transporting him back into the city, reminding the man of when he was last there. 

"(F/N), you're an insufferable tease." Sweeping around, you made sure to encompass the whole place, walking forwards to zoom in on the food counter. Despite it only being a matter of days since the texts started, the amount of time you'd spent virtually talking meant that it was like you had known one another for years. "Go over to the left. Left more." His words were tinny and quiet, however still discernable and you did as asked, hovering over a specific dish. "Oh yes, that's the shit. Ever had it?"

"No Levi, never. Recommendation?"

"Hell yea. Just don't eat it in front of me or I may just have to courier myself over there." It gave him an idea, next command given as he watched intently, seeing your world through electronic eyes. "Step to the side. Get out of everyone's way (F/N)...ok. Switch to front camera."

"No way! I look like a drowned rat!" 

"Please." The softness in his request banished any concerns and you recognised a hint of loneliness, knowing his work arrangements meant little contact and you sighed, flicking the screen to show your bedraggled face staring back at you, speaker on loud so you could still hear him. 

"Satisfied?" 

"Yes." Levi focussed on the way your lips moved, the expression in your gaze which was alive and excited as he mumbled quietly. "Just talk."

"What about?"

"Anything. Go order your food. Pretend I'm not even here." 

"Pretend? Ok then…" Feeling a little on the stupid side, you kept the device up and caught a server's attention, asking politely for the one which had been painted as a good choice and you handed money over, smile in place for the cashier. In his restrictive dungeon the pale man stared, friendly joy on your features just as the man in brown had said, beauty effortless and warm. Even something this simple like getting lunch sent his heart rate up, the mundane actions causing him a desolate kind of glee as Levi wished he was there right now, soaked from head to toe and laughing with you at the event, ready to share a meal. That inspired him some more and he made a mental note to do something later on. 

As you thanked the worker, a paper bag was passed over and you lingered by the door, peering out at the skies.

"Ok I think it's stopped for a second. I'm gonna go for it."

"Don't get me wet, (F/N)." 

"I'll protect you." Winking at what to you was yourself, you chortled and strode out, skipping around lying water and making the short journey back to the mail room. "See? All safe."

"Careful you don't walk into anything."

"Shit…" Dodging a lamp post, you had to keep glancing up to avoid hurdles, entrance reached and you stopped, finding it odd to be talking to your own image. "Well, I'm back."

"I'll let you get on with your lunch. Save me some?"

"One day we can have it together." 

"Yes, one day." Swapping goodbyes, you turned the video call off and sighed, walking in with wet steps and recalling your package, bag placed on the unused desk and parcel sourced. The others were in the second room, running envelopes through the large machine by the sounds of it, the odd squeak of rage from Eren every time you heard the tell-tale growl of a jam in the mechanisms. Fork in one hand, you ate hungrily, savouring what was a tremendous dish and you picked at the bubbly sleeve that protected Levi's delivery. The items were revealed, a fabric bag full of different colours and shapes, all beautifully natural and pastel with swirls and patterns, probably around thirty sea shells now in your possession. 

Running a delicate touch across the smooth surfaces, you noted how expertly they had been cleaned up, only a few grains of sand within them and all gleaming brilliantly, shiny offerings like candy, treasures all for you to appreciate. There was no accompanying letter, didn't really need to be now and in a mirror of prior actions, you lifted the envelope to smell inside. The freshness of an ocean scene after a storm had passed filled your senses, an incredibly lifting aroma which told of waves, gulls, the sound of water lapping at a peaceful shore with sedate strokes…

"(F/N), there had better not be any drugs in there."

"Huh?" You realised you'd practically been wearing the packet like a horse's feed-bag and lowered it, blissed out face akin to someone indeed on some kind of narcotic. "No Jean, no drugs."

"Whatever." He got closer, the cries of anger still filtering through as yet again another malfunction had taken place with machinery and the tall man smiled kindly, any of his usual mirth gone from the gesture. "Listen, can I ask you something (F/N)?" Jean shifted sideways, making you move whether you wanted to or not as he squeezed to share the office chair which up until now had been yours. 

"Yea sure, hit me with it." 

"Did you speak to Eren?" 

"What about?" Keeping coy, you maintained an air of innocence and bit back the need to lick the contents of your recently finished lunch tub. 

"I dunno, he just seems more friendly. Don't get me wrong, it's nice but…odd."

"What is you want Jean? From him, I mean."

"Eh? What…what do you mean?" Forgetting about everything else, you gave him a look that said 'drop it' and tilted your head, putting the man in a position of only being able to spill his guts, one of your many talents picked up in a former life. "Oh fuck it. Ok. I like him and I know he likes me. We act like kids on the playground though, pulling each other's hair to get attention. Now though (F/N), maybe we've moved past that?"

"Maybe you have. You can only try. Don't lose that chance." You gave a similar message, bringing two obviously interested people together and hoping to high hell it wasn't going to end in a massive argument. "Take him out. Talk."

"Hey, why do I have to take him out?!"

"Jean, you're doing it again."

"Shit." He laughed, head shaking slowly and he kissed your cheek. "God help me but I'm gonna do it." Finally they seemed to have grown out of the fighting phase and you grinned. "Anyway, where did all these shells come from?"

"Oh, just a friend."

"A friend?" Jean stood and gave an exact replica of your 'no bullshit' glare. "Now who's in denial?" The male walked away, hands in pockets and probably in the process of shitting eighteen bricks - you could even see his ears turn red as he entered the second room, noises subsiding as a hushed and most likely awkward yet appreciated conversation was held and you scooped up your phone to relay a message. 

'Thank you Levi. They're beautiful. Where did you get them?'

'The beach, dumbass.' It was the clear answer but you hadn't expected this, presumed stores around there sold bags to be bought by tourists. 

'You collected them yourself?' 

'No, I have a specially trained dog who carries them around in his mouth.'

'Glad you cleaned them so well, then.'

'And I'm glad you like them. Look, I have a round of poker tonight, call you after?'

'Sure thing. Thanks again for my presents.'

'My pleasure.' 

Arranging to speak now seemed normal so soon after your water-logged discussion, a regular occurrence that may take over texts like the latter had diminished the original medium. Something about losing that part made you slightly empty, now corresponding with Levi through regular ways like the rest of the world. You weren't quite ready to say farewell to that and took advantage of the peace, paper sourced and pen in hand. 

Not even stopping, you stayed hunched over the desk twenty minutes later when another presence appeared, lack of speech making you eventually glance up to see a rather shocked Eren, his cheeks red and mouth open as he stood dumbfounded in front of you. Time had been irrelevant and you'd totally been unaware of their company.

"Eren?" Hoping that the conflict of the century hadn't just happened, your concern turned to confusion as Jean ran through, on his way to the bathroom with a sheepish grin on his face. As the door slammed, you searched emerald orbs and found a light in them you'd not seen before, almost golden spots of sunshine and you held a palm up. "What's going on?"  
"I'm…we're…going on a date I think." 

"That's fantastic! But why do you look like you've been holding your breath for an hour?" 

"Well…" He scratched at the back of his neck, gaze down and a small smile materialised. "It's kinda hard to catch air when you're kissing." 

"Oh my god, you made out in the printer room?! That's classic. Absolutely amazing, come here!" You hugged tightly, intensely happy that these two had made that first step and put any insecurities or childish fights behind them. 

~~~~~~

You'd received a few texts during the evening, most from your friends giving updates on each other without them knowing and it seemed to be going well, dinner turning to drinks and some truths shared. The last message had been sent by Levi, apologies given for the late running game, chance of a call tonight looking less likely by the minute. Plenty time for that, you thought and climbed into bed, long day catching up and sleep came quickly. 

It didn't last, shrill noise invading your forming dream and you were dragged out of slumber with confusion, the worst possible time to be roused and you saw a request to speak coming through on your phone, button clicked before you could register what was going on. 

"…lo?" Managing just one sound, you held the device out and squinted, bright screen showing a handsome face - he'd video called you. 

"Did I wake you up (F/N)?" True concern was evident on manly yet beautiful features, male sitting back in what looked like his own bed. 

"No…no, it's all good…" Levi couldn't see a thing, darkness at your end and he smirked, expression exuding playful mischief, voice demure and silky.

"So you just hang around in the pitch black, yes?"

"Fuck…hang on." Reaching back, you switched on the dim lamp and squeezed your eyes shut, not ready for that assault and you heard a tiny laugh. "What? I'm blinded and you find it funny?"

"No, I find it adorable." 

There was no way to hide the incoming blush so you gave up and peeked, one lid open to view your penpal. He stared kindly, something like warmth in his gaze which you didn't know how to respond to, lungs ceasing action momentarily. The man was enraptured, lucky enough to see you twice in one day, once soaked in rain and the other slightly unkempt and lying in bed - both completely endearing instances of your life, a woman not afraid to just talk and not worry too much about appearances. And on that subject, he found your current state deeply attractive, biting his tongue before an inappropriate line slipped out. 

"I'm not adorable, I'm a mess."

"An adorable mess then. Like my fucking kitten." 

Laughing, you rubbed at weary eyes and shuffled to get comfy, phone propped up on the empty pillow as you laid sideways, one hand under your cheek. Levi honestly thought he would explode there and then, heart surely growing inches in size as you snuggled into blue sheets, fixing him with the most piercing look of joy and contentment. You searched the visual treat on display, casual pyjama top sitting loosely on that brilliant china skin, shadows casting exquisite shapes across such a gorgeous face and hair gleaming. 

"So, did you win?"

"Win what?" It came out croaked, throat cleared to pass the choke off as a cough, man momentarily having no clue what you were talking about. Giving an exaggerated sigh, you smiled and replied with a chiding tone.

"The poker, silly." 

"Oh, yes. Of course. I always win. Mike can't play for shit."

"Who's Mike?"

"My boss and a fucking giant of humanity. Happens to be my closest friend, too." You yawned uncontrollably, action stifled too late and Levi moved round, mirroring your position. "Boring you, am I?" He meant no harm, no ill intent and you knew it.

"Well, if you will call me in the dead of night…"

"It's eleven on a Friday."

"Shut up. I was tired, all that running around in your rain wore me out." 

"I take no responsibility for that, (F/N)."

It went quiet, a steady clock ticking from his end as you both just stared at your respective screens, memorizing every contour, each part of the other's facade, all of it. Soaking up one another's essence, you remained that way for a while, feeling no awkwardness at simply lying there as if under the covers together in reality. Finally, inviting lips mumbled softly, seeing them move causing elation in your soul.

"Sorry for waking you up. You need to rest."

"No! No it's ok I…" Yawn. "I want to talk to you Levi."

"Tomorrow. When you're more coherent?" You knew he was right but hated having to cut this short, nodding with a pout like a scolded toddler. "Ok, that's a deal. You going to be busy?"

"Hmm, let me see…food shopping in the morning then fuck all for the rest of the day, so no. You?"

"Resisting the urge to pull my fucking fingernails out and playing chess with myself. So yes, incredibly." 

"Well then, any time after ten and I'm all yours."

"Is that a promise (F/N)?"

"Yes it is." Sharing a smile, you got closer and held up a hand, wanting to stroke at the image before you but styling it out as a wave. "Until tomorrow, Levi?"

"Count on it. Good night."

"Night." 

Slowly, a pale digit moved in and clicked the red button, your face now gone, leaving an empty hole in his chest. Damn Mike and his second wind, he cursed. Always trying to turn it around at the last minute. But tomorrow…that would be undisturbed and well spent. Simultaneously, the pair of you extinguished low bulbs and lay back, mouths still showing the same grins as the hope for pleasant dreams filtered across in unison from hundreds of miles away.


	7. Conversations

"Tell me everything." 

Walking round the supermarket, you lazily dropped produce into your cart, doing the shopping with an earpiece in to chat whilst busy, meaning to keep the line free from ten as promised. 

"Everything?"

"Yea Eren, you called me, remember? You obviously want to gush." Tins and packets joined the edible party in your metal cage, clunks denoting a soon to be full cupboard. 

"Ok, well we went for something to eat and…" He didn't know Jean had already spoken with you an hour ago, his own version of events given and now you had Eren's side, tales corroborating pretty well, just the odd conflicting piece of information. For example, the one currently chatting excitedly failed to mention the moment he put his elbow in the butter when trying to pull off a flirtatious lean, something that threatened to cause you to burst out laughing all over again - he apparently thought he'd gotten away with it. "And then Jean, the fucking dopey idiot, he only went and…" So here was a slice of reality from the other side, an embarrassing incident which involved the taller of the pair using the table cloth as a napkin by mistake.

The way Eren spoke was full of life and enthusiasm, a wonderful tone to his voice that lit him up and lifted your heart, babbles of glee spilling into your ear as vegetables were haphazardly piled high. Their night had ended with a stroll beneath the stars, or what was visible of them anyway; Storm Levi was still gracing you with cloudy patches, yet it didn't seem to have deterred the new couple, kisses and hand-holding as far as they got. 

"…because you know, I'm not putting out on a first date (F/N), even if I have known him for ages." 

"No you don't want to do that. Second date maybe."

"(F/N)! Stop trying to corrupt me!"

"Eren, you're already corrupted, or was that guy last year just inviting you round for milk and cookies?"

A pause ensued and you imagined your friend having an internal struggle, torn between wanting to maintain an air of dignity and gagging to let his slutty side out. The former won. Kind of.

"No, it was for coffee, thank you very much." Silence again. "And a damn good blow job." 

"Ha, there it is!" Laughing, you started to pile your items on the moving belt, products stacked and delivered along to the cashier whom you gave a winning smile to. "But seriously, I'm happy for you. Really. You want to take it slow, take it slow. Enjoy each other first."

"So we wouldn't enjoy it if...you know…?"

"Yes, I didn't mean that." Recalling conversations in the past, you packed bags with skill and brought a particular chat to the fore, the look of regret on one person's face emblazoned on your mind's eye. "Jumping in to bed straight away can lead to trouble."

"I'm not a virgin."

"Never said you were Eren. Just be sure though, yea? If you're after a quick bang then find someone else. Jean seems to be into you in a big way, don't mess it up for a meaningless fuck." The woman behind the register raised her brows and you mouthed 'sorry', cheeks pink and voice low. "Look, I'm in the store so no more girl talk."

"We're going to the movies tonight as well. I can't wait." He sounded smitten already, something you could relate to and a small flicker of energy balled in your stomach, rolled around and tickled your insides. Today had been greatly anticipated, a kind of date really when you thought about it. "So what are you up to after the shopping?"

"Me? Oh, might take a walk. See some sights."

"Since when were you a tourist (F/N)?"

"I'm not. Going to show someone around, let them see how much it's changed in this place." 

"Ooooh so you do have a little love interest after all?! Fair play (F/N), guy or girl?"

"Guy."

"What's he like?" 

Paying by card, you thanked the lady who still eyed you with suspicion and sped away, arms full and handles hanging off your limbs. 

"Fucking gorgeous Eren. Like you wouldn't believe. And he's funny in a 'I hate everything' kind of way but it's all a front I think."

"Well, bring him round! Let me meet this mysterious man!"

Ah. There was the problem. How far did you go, tell all and risk being viewed as an idiot who was growing fond of a virtual stranger? Or white-wash over the details? If you wanted Eren to trust your advice, seek it out and take comfort in the words of wisdom you gave, honesty was the only option. 

"Can't really. He's hundreds of miles away on the coast." 

"Sorry, what? How does that work then?"

"We write. Text. Speak. He video called me last night so today I'm going to take my phone for a tour, basically."

"Ok that's kinda cute in a fucked up way." Giggles came through the bud in your ear and you grinned, pushing your apartment block's door open with your ass. "How did you 'meet'? And yes, I just did bunny ears in the air with my fingers because I presume you've never actually met?" 

"He sent mail to the wrong address."

Skipping the elevator, you took the stairs to maintain signal and puffed your way up flights of demonic steps, each one taking a little piece of your soul and a chunk of muscle strength. 

"That's it? You just started writing to some random and gave them your number? (F/N)…and you tell me to take it slow? He'll be wanting phone sex."

"No he won't!" Screeching with airless lungs, you reached your floor and rested a moment, the ability to move a far away friend. "It's not like that."

"Yea right. It's always like that. But hey, you just keep on believing your own truth."

"Eren, as much as I'd love to speak with you about whether or not Levi wants to talk dirty to me, I'm afraid I have to go and put this shit away, my ice cream's gonna melt."

"Oh! If it does, later you could drip it on your…" End call. No way were you about to let him finish that suggestion and you unlocked the door, crashing through with effort and racing to the kitchen. Bags down, you pulled out a cable, device charging to give you as much time out of the battery as possible, fully intending on doing as explained - taking Levi to visit his old haunts. 

Dead on ten AM, the fully powered phone rang, incoming video call announced and you smiled, picking the connection up instantly without even thinking about what you looked like - he'd seen you wet through and half asleep, not much worse could be available, surely. 

"Morning (F/N). How are you on this bastard awful day?"

"Hello Levi, it's actually ok here for now. Are you trying to tell me your shitty weather is coming over again?"

"Nah. Bright sunshine actually." He was wearing a dark sweater, woolly item denoting comfort and telling of a not so warm glow from the golden ball in the sky, man standing in his kitchen from what you could establish. "It's just fucking boring. I've been up since five and all I have is seagulls and a distinct hatred for quiet places." You shifted on one hip, giving the man an oblique view of your open plan living area and he flicked grey eyes over the scene, taking in your own autumnal wardrobe choice of a thick, deep blue top. 

"So is today that one day, Levi?" Pushing at the grumble which you knew to be half assed, you smirked and raised a brow, his answer deadpan but a faint glimmer of enjoyment crossed his face. 

"Perhaps. We'll see. Now, what would you like to do?"

The odd situation made you chuckle and shrug, hair played with lazily as the screen was held out far enough to give a view of your person. Levi nodded, partly in amusement at your 'date' and partly in appreciation for the image he was graced with - your bright gaze and open features, the faint pink tone to cheeks that suggested you were in the same place as he was; skirting around the borders of wanting to flirt with someone you found attractive and intriguing. 

"I was going to take you for a walk, actually."

"Like a fucking puppy?"

"Aw, you don't need the leash Levi. I'll let you roam free?"

"Better do." Sniffing, the man glanced to the side as if totally disinterested but you could still see the fire in his orbs, a white splash which seemed impossible. "Alright, I'm up for that. Don't I get to see your place first?"

"Sure. Hang on." Yanking the cord from your phone, time started to tick down as battery life began to be leeched away second by second, portable emergency electricity pod already available and stashed in your bag. You turned the screen around, sweeping side to side slowly. "This is the kitchen…" Levi noted some utensils and items on the higher end of quality and surmised that you enjoyed cooking, a shared hobby already ticked off the list so soon. "…and the couch…" Making the small journey around your apartment, all the rooms were explored, noises of appreciation from the receiver. "So that's that. Not much but it's home."

"It's nice."

"Nice." Switching to stare into the virtual smugness, you tutted. "In other words 'tiny', right?"

"No (F/N), it's lovely. Very bijou." 

"Ok, now I know you're taking the piss but rents don't allow me to get much else. Anyway, what about yours? How come you get to sit there and spectate?"

"Oh no. No." Levi leant in, cocked brow challenging in a seductive way. "You're taking ME out today. I'm expecting to be wooed." 

"Wooed. Like courted?"

"Yes. And you're doing a fucking bad job of it right now. Come on, show a guy a good time." It had a double meaning but stopped short of requesting anything smutty, ripples of suggestion not yet breaking the surface and you grinned. 

"Fine. But you'd better reciprocate. Ok, ready to go? Do you need the bathroom first?"

"No I'm all empty, thanks." Keeping up the amusing pretence of actually being together, you stuck the earpiece in, grabbed a coat and left your apartment, signal briefly lost on the elevator trip down, only to be regained on the ground floor. 

"So I thought we could go into town, show you what's changed? Did you work here?"

"Yea, not far from your place actually." You had the phone steady in your hand, pointing it out so your passenger could see in an albeit bouncy manner whilst you spoke into the small microphone on the cable. 

"Where next?"

"Take a left at the bakers." Negotiating the weekend shoppers and tourists, you travelled deeper into the city that both of you knew so well, side streets traversed until you came to an impressive building, red bricks interspersed with cream coloured inlays, gold lamps hanging importantly above a huge wooden door. You'd been past it often but saw it as just another office, the edifice blending into the background on your anonymous trips. As you stood staring upwards, the man in your palm did the same, taking in his old employer's residence with a little pang of regret but mainly relief. "Hasn't changed a bit."

"No, round here it stays the same. Down by the river is where it looks different from one day to the next." Finally, you paid attention to the brass plaque on the wall which advised you of the sort of thing that went on in here and nodded. "You worked for a law firm?"

"I did indeed." Face to face again, you looked upon the soft features which held no anger or distaste, just a kind of calm, one which spoke of contentment at his decision to move away.

"In the mail room?" As you said it, the words seemed wrong and you knew it hadn't been a postal position. 

"Oh no." Rubbing his cheek, Levi gave a miniscule smirk and snorted a laugh. "I was a defence lawyer."

"Fuck off!"

"I will not." He studied your wide eyes, saw how the late autumn sun reflected beautifully and noted your slightly red cheeks. "You're cold (F/N)."

"Huh? No, I'm ok. But seriously, you were a lawyer?"

"Yes. Now go down to the right, get in that coffee shop and warm up. Your teeth are clacking." Shamefully, they were and you rushed to the café, spying a seat in the corner and hoping no one got there first. 

"What can I get you, Levi?"

"Tch. Tease. I would actually love one of their cocoa kisses…" He trailed off, your change in angle allowing him to drag his gaze over the place he used to frequent every single day, his favourite if expensive tea always ready and waiting each morning. You, however, giggled. 

"Hold on, cocoa kisses? I have this picture in my head of you wrapped up in a blanket drinking hot chocolate right now. With a pipe in your mouth."

"Piss off (F/N), it's not chocolate. It's Colombian black tea with cocoa peel." Back to looking at one another, you could almost taste his longing and smiled. 

"That good, huh?"

"That fucking good."

When it was your turn, you ordered the beverage on recommendation - he'd been right about the food yesterday, so you trusted his opinion. Luckily the table which offered privacy was still available and you moved to sit, scent of the deep infusion telling you it had been a great choice. 

"So, explain. How do you go from being a defence attorney to opening letters?"

Levi sighed. It wasn't an awful story by any means, but he hadn't told it in a while, everyone in his home town knowing the truth before he'd even settled back there; gossip was rife, couldn't be helped in such small villages, so when he returned after years in the big city, they welcomed him with open arms and demands for tales of metropolitan life. 

"I should've been a prosecutor but I was apparently so talented at twisting and manipulating real events that the partners made me take on clients who had no fucking hope in hell of winning without me. Taste it." Pointing to the cup, the man watched with parted lips as you took a drink, your lids closing in pleasure.   
"My god, that is awesome. Fuck." It was rich and clean, not sickly like chocolate but strong and pure, surely your new go-to now despite the price. 

"See?" Levi was practically salivating, making do with his shitty choice as he boiled water - you hadn't even noticed him changing position and smiled as he curled up again, china mug in hand as you shared a cuppa. "Anyway. With that kind of customer base, I met some people. Questionable people. Horrible actually. I had to get up and spin a yarn about how upstanding these criminals were, paint a glowing report of saintly behaviour and point out how they couldn't possibly have been the fucker who'd stabbed a cop, robbed a store, dealt in weapons." He sipped, jealous of your own gulps and continued before that manifested into a self-inflicted moan. "One day, the father of a well known drugs 'king' approached me." The venom on one word was obvious and you listened intently. "Offered me a tremendous amount of money to get his son off the charges he'd been slapped with." Scowling, Levi shook his head and you watched disgust invade his expression, no one else existing right now, the joys of knowing not a single person around. 

"You don't have to say it…"

"No, I do. Because it makes me look fucking good." He offered you a wry smile, attractive lips turning up with sarcastic mirth. "His piece of shit offspring had taken advantage of his trade, came slithering in on some high school teens and one by one, discarded those savvy enough to stay away until he was left with a follower."

"What did he do?" You were whispering, afraid of the conclusion. 

"Pumped him full of narcotics, got him hooked and basically made the boy his play thing. Did whatever he wanted, physical and mental, broke that guy down until all that remained was a shell."

"Shit…I…"

"That kid was thirteen (F/N). Thirteen fucking years old and addicted to heroin, sold for sex and used up. And they wanted me to defend the sorry shit that did it all." Cup down, Levi looked to one side again, distancing himself from the story with theatrical boredom. "So I refused. Point blank told them no fucking way, not on my watch. After that I got some threats, people following me home, flashing knives at me from the shadows and it suddenly became clear. I hated what I did, all the guilty individuals I'd freed and profited from so I decided to do something about it."

"Move back home."

"Mmm. But not before I visited that boy's family and gave them enough money to put him through decent rehab and pay for therapy. They had fuck all and this had nearly broken them. Least I could do to atone for my sins and use some of the dirty cash I'd earned."

"Oh Levi…that's…it's…"

"You can say it. I'm a wonderful fucking human being." The ego was affected, put on and insincere but it allowed the mood to lighten somewhat. "So here I am, slicing envelopes in my tomb and secretly enjoying every single minute." 

"You're incredible."

"No I'm not (F/N). I allowed monsters to live their lives as if they'd never done a single thing wrong. It's because of me that certain crimes still happen there."

"Levi, someone else would've done it if you didn't. Don't beat yourself up."

"Yes but someone else didn't. I did. Me." He sounded resigned, imparting a fact which had already been chewed up and digested. "I've made my peace with it mostly. Sometimes I think about what's in the past and cringe, go a bit morose and introverted but not often. Only now and again."

"Well if now and again ever comes up, call me. I don't want you to battle that alone." 

"Thank you (F/N). I may just do that, test your listening skills."

"I'd be honoured." Silently drinking in tandem, the pair of you connected over a warm tea, far apart but at the same time, so close.


	8. Learning

"Hang on, stop. There." Ordered by the voice in your ear, you halted and glanced around, unsure what had caught Levi's attention. All you could see was a couple of shoe stores and a confectioners. "Yea, that's the shit. Ok, in you go."

"Where?"

"The candy place, (F/N)."

"Really? Didn't have you down as someone with a sweet tooth Levi."

"Never underestimate the pull of sugar." It was a kingdom of treats, floor to ceiling shelves full of jars and packets, everything shining like treasure in their bright plastic covers and you started to hum without thinking. "What is that?" Adding words, you sung quietly with a smirk. 

"Come with me, and you'll be, in a world of pure imagination…"

"Don't get all Willy Wonka on my ass." Quickly turning the screen, you gave him an air kiss and winked, finding his childish wonder over sweets rather adorable. "Oh fuck, there they are."

"Which ones?" 

"The round ones in the counter." Getting close, you felt a bit silly standing angling a tiny image of a man into glass as a small gurgle sounded out, cashier frowning slightly. If everyone you'd walked past today got together, their shared experiences of the woman leading a phone around would add up to quite the odd tale and you laughed. 

"You like macaroons, Levi?"

"Who doesn't?"

"Erm…I've never had them."

"Oh please, behave. Seriously?"

"Seriously."

"(F/N), you poor innocent lamb. So sheltered."

"What, because I haven't eaten a macaroon? That's not fucking sheltered."

"It really is." A beeping interrupted your conversation, a sound you hated to hear and you straightened, facing Levi with sorrow as you stepped out onto the street again. 

"My battery's running out."

"Shit. How long have we been walking around?"

"Nearly three hours."

"Jesus. No wonder my feet hurt."

"Very funny. Ok, I need to eat too and get a few bits, call in an hour or so?"

"Sounds good. What are…" He was cut off as two unknown faces bundled into the screen over your shoulder, males squealing loud enough to be heard through the microphone and he saw your face drop first before turning to a softer expression, one he wished he had caused. You picked the ear bud out and let the sound of your surroundings invade Levi's house, the noise of a buzzing collection of humans which was bittersweet - he did miss it to an extent. Scowling up, the man spoke loudly with a gruff tone. "And who is this?" It came out like envy and he winced, hating his base reaction but at least you didn't seem to notice. 

"Levi, this is Eren and Jean. You can call them Dumb and Dumber, I'll let you decide which is which."

"Hey! I'm obviously Dumb."

"Eren, that does not make you sound good."

"At least I'm not Dumber, jackass." Jean laughed, head back and he threw his arm around the shorter person's shoulders, leaning in comfortably like he belonged there as you stepped forwards, apology evident in your eyes.

"Sorry Levi. Of all the places…"

"No problem (F/N). Friends I presume?"

"Yea, the guys from work. They're harmless really."

"And getting into something by the looks of it." The spark of mischief in his smirk made you turn, faced by tiny kisses and a bright red Eren. "It's kind of sweet."

"Oi! I'm not sweet!" The emerald eyed individual sulked at an unknown entity, the deep and smooth voice making it's way easily across to him. 

"Yes you are." Jean looked wholly enamoured, months of keeping his emotions at bay and you could see real feelings on his calm features, the way brown orbs gazed at one person and one person alone - work would be interesting from now on. 

"And that's my cue to go. Speak soon Levi?"

"Bet on it." 

Hanging up with a wink, you noted 2% remaining on the battery and sighed, so much to do and so little time. 

"Hey guys, sorry, I have to get stuff done."

"Was that your new man (F/N)?"

"Something like that Jean. Anyway, you seem to be having fun?"

"Always. I'm taking this one out for lunch."

"Why am I taken out again? I like how everyone presumes I'm the wife."

"Well, aren't you?" Giving him your best 'cut the act' look, you were met by a sly grin and a shrug, man accepting his apparent fate. "Right, I have to shoot. Behave yourselves."

"We will. And (F/N)?" Suddenly studious green pinned you in place, a finger waving over. "You too. Be careful."

"Eren, relax. I am not doing a sex show."

"Better not." Chastised by someone younger than you, the middle finger was shown and you scurried off, three places on your to-do list. 

~~~~~~

Everything had been done, a sandwich practically inhaled and an amount of forethought on your part had come in handy, latest letter to Levi dispatched via standard mail. The one you'd written yesterday had been added to, swift notes made and you checked your phone, red now gone and the green symbol shown was looking much healthier. A message was blinking too and you opened it, words from your date. 

'Let me know when you're ready. You can keep plugged in, have a rest. My turn.' 

That changed things. Moving the charger to the socket by your couch, you took the tea over too, cup of Levi's cocoa kisses on the go which you'd never admit to for fear of repercussions. Getting comfortable, you advised him to call at will and waited only ten seconds for contact. 

"Alright (F/N). You ready?" He was wearing a jacket, cord running from his ear as he took on the position of tour guide. 

"Sure am." 

"Ok, I'm starting upstairs because I couldn't be assed to go up and down unnecessarily. Here's the bedroom…" You watched with awe as the quaint home was revealed, low beams and original features, open fireplaces and an overall cosy aura to the scene. There was a rug at the foot of his bed which looked the perfect place to sit and soak up the flames, cuddled together in a quilt whilst staring into the orange dancing warmth. Still dreaming of doing just that, you noticed a spare room flashing by with not much in there, a bathroom and then you were down on ground level, surprisingly airy living space all opened up to create a large area, walls white and avoiding making it oppressive. 

"It's gorgeous Levi. You really take good care of your home."

"Where the heart is, right? Now…it's a bit windy out so hold on tight." The door was nearly thrown off it's hinges, blustery gust attacking the wooden entrance and you heard a grumble and the sound of a zipper being pulled further towards the owner's chin. "Fuck me, it's worse than before." You weren't listening though, shamefully zoning out as the view you were treated to took up all of your concentration. 

Sun rays broke through the now gathering clouds, painting splashes of light on a squally ocean which churned and crashed with it's power, temper tantrum in force that consisted of waves and thunderous growls. Levi crossed the quiet road, no chance of vehicles on a Saturday and his shoes crunched across the beach, pebbles and shells making a rocky noise to join the tumultuous breaks on the shore line. Stopping short of walking into the sea, the man paused and let you absorb his daily neighbour, knowing how the sight could take breaths away easily - hell, it still did that to him at times too. 

The camera was angled and you saw the way that jet black hair whipped at porcelain skin, picked up and tossed around in hypnotic motions and he smirked, eyes on you. 

"It's not bad I guess."

"Not bad? It's fucking amazing Levi! No wonder you didn't mind moving back."

"It does have a certain charm at times. Right, here we go. This will take approximately ten minutes if we don't get stoped by some little shit so pay attention, it's gonna be quick."

"Not what a lady likes to hear, but ok."

"Filth." Positioning your image again, the same gravelly steps were taken until terra firma was reached, the wind whistling in the speakers and crackling loudly; you almost felt like you were there and sipped your tea for comfort from the stormy day. "Ok, you can pretty much see everything here. Street. Houses. General store. Pub. Docks." 

"Where did you grow up?"

"That one over there, hang on." A slight upwards trek was made through dark bricked buildings, puffs of breath audible and Levi came to stop at a larger home, twin windows on the front and a picturesque front garden behind a white fence - idyllic would be the right word. 

"Do your parents still…are they…?" Hating the ease at which the question escaped your lips, you squeezed your eyes shut and grimaced, sure a faux pas had just been uttered. Grey slits studied your expression and he laughed lightly. 

"No, they passed quite a few years ago."

"Sorry Levi." 

"Don't be. Both had peaceful ends, no pain. As good as death can be, I suppose." Watching his calm face, you understood how he took solace in that kind of farewell, mourning made slightly more palatable by the circumstances. "What about you?" He hoped it wasn't out of order, a mirrored query that he presumed would be met by a cheerful tale of family life. That didn't come. 

"Gone."

"Shit…I shouldn't have…" The look he saw was the opposite to his own, bitter almost and he clenched his jaw. You, however, were fine to relay the story, let it out as hanging on to burdens never did you any favours. 

"No it's ok. It still hurts but nearly six years have gone by so I have to stop being scared of saying this." Taking a deep breath, you noticed Levi's eyes were trained on you, sincere apology in those now familiar steely hues. "They were both in service, the army, posted in different areas but the same transport helicopter picked them up on their last day. The enemy targeted it from the ground, they never stood a chance." Nodding at nothing in particular, you laughed with wretched, ironic humour. "They were coming home Levi. Bound for the airfield and a plane back here but they never made it." 

"Sorry (F/N)."

"Thanks." Finishing off your tea, you placed the cup down and sighed. "The government gave me a payment, kind of like a life insurance policy I guess so I've put it away, saving for an early retirement or something."

"That's very sensible." 

"Eventually, yea. I wasn't at first." The wind was practically tearing at onyx locks and you frowned. "Hey, get inside. You look frozen."

"It is a bit shitty, I must admit. Ok, return trip." The world bobbed up and down as you watched the sea coming closer again, moving with more vigour than before and you noted the speed of the journey had increased. "Fucking raining again." The gripe was low and dark, sound of shoes fast and quickly you were transported into safety, door closed with an unintentional slam. "Give me a second." Suddenly your screen showed nothing but darkness, cloth noises filtering through as you imagined Levi taking his jacket and footwear off. 

"Hey! Did you have to put me face down?"

"Sorry." Retrieving you from the kitchen surface, he smiled, new idea in mind. "You got Skype?"

"Yea."

"Much better than these small things. Five minutes?"

"Make it ten. Bathroom stop."

"Good idea." He hung up and sent his details through as you fired up the laptop, rushing to relieve yourself of too much tea. The skies outside were still relatively calm, but perhaps they would change soon, welcome in the newest downpour which was hitting Levi's town. Or maybe the storm would go another way, taken away from you cruelly before being able to experience the same sensations. 

New cup brewing, you heard the tuneful alert and pressed to answer, computer on the kitchen surface which revealed a larger view, man's own device resting on the arm of a small couch as he lounged back against the other, no need to hold onto the method of communication anymore. 

"What's that (F/N)?"

"Tea."

"Yes. What sort?"

"Just normal stuff." Hiding a blush of deception, you swiftly finished off and took your items to the sofa, similar position in place and mug in hand. 

"You were saying how you weren't always so sensible? That is, if you want to carry on?"

"Yea, if you want to hear it?"

"Of course." He had one palm between his head and a cushion, leaning to the side and expression sombre, ready to listen. 

"I sold the house, rented a pissy little apartment and used the money to go a bit mad, quit my job and hung around the wrong kind of places. I guess I was trying to tempt fate in a way, hoping something bad would happen and take me off to see mum and dad again." Swirling the liquid, you watched stray leaves circling and shook your head. "I didn't want to die really, just needed a distraction. Eventually I grew up, stopped being a stupid prick and got a new job with people I'd met during darker times."

"You weren't being a prick, (F/N). Grief can do strange things to us, especially when it's unexpected."

"Nah, I was a prize fuckwit. Seriously. Totally drunk every night, throwing money at strippers, getting into fights. Stupid." 

"We all have regrets. Don't feel bad."

"I turned it into a positive though, Levi. Everything makes us who we are today so I used it to become a better person hopefully." Drinking deeply, you were comforted by the beverage and smiled. "I learnt a lot. Started working in a lapdancing club." Leaving that one hanging out there, you hid a grin behind your mug and waited. 

"That's…interesting?" Images flew through Levi's brain, all of them inappropriate but most welcome and he sat up, resting sideways against the back of the couch and a small smirk twitching on his lips. 

"Oh it was. You meet some interesting people standing behind the bar and serving drinks in a place like that." 

"You little shit."

Laughter sprung from your mouth, evil and hilarity transforming previously sombre features and a pillow was launched at your screen, a shriek given as if you'd really been hit. 

"What? I didn't lie. Bet you were thinking about me wrapped around a pole, right?"

"Wrapped around something, (F/N)." 

"I did pick up some moves actually. Might show you one day if you're lucky."

"I would very much enjoy that."

Silently imagining a private show, both of you kept your libidos in check, Eren's words of warning ringing in your ears and Levi's own sense of romanticism preventing any further discussion on that point. 

"Most of the guys were there to forget. Drown their sorrows. A surprising amount of them saw me as their agony aunt, women too, some of the dancers as well. So I became rather adept at listening and giving advice, usually on relationships or the destruction of them. A lot of broken souls hang around in strip clubs." 

"I can imagine. We don't get any of that here. Have to go two towns over to even start to hit fucking civilisation." 

"That's a good thing though Levi."

"It can be, yes. Why did you quit?"

"Too many people knew me. I'd be walking down the street, just doing some shopping or something and bam, there would be a customer chewing my ear off, talking as if I was their personal therapist. I was recognised, sought out, badgered constantly." Draining your drink, you edged towards the screen instinctively, getting close as could be to the man on the other end like he was really here. "I liked helping people but when it became a twenty four hour job, I was desperate to be forgotten about, left alone. Also, some of them expected more."

"More?"

"Yup. I might not have gotten naked every night for a living but association dictates mindsets sometimes. I'd get propositions, promises of cash for favours and sex. It was all too much."

"Hang on." Upright, Levi bristled with anger at those who had suggested such things to you, protection the main emotion in his heart. "People actually just came up in the supermarket and said they'd pay you to fuck them?"

"Mmm hmm. Expected it too. They got quite pissed off when I said no, physical too."

"Bunch of cunts."

"Yup. All I wanted to do was pour scotch or mix cocktails, not defend against unwanted advances. Which is why I ended up leaving, moved from the red light district and into this place. Same city but a different area, like two complete opposites."

"Well, I can see why you like where I live, (F/N)."

"Looks like a dream come true."

"You say that now. Wait until you see the fucking pub and meet some of the locals." 

A pause in proceedings had eventually come around after more chats, dinner taking priority and you ate in the quiet kitchen, no one to speak with and feeling deeply lonely. You'd spent practically all day with Levi and now that he'd gone, it left a void that needed filling. Similarly, the one on your thoughts picked through his food with lacklustre, swallowing even seeming like too much effort and he sighed, fork down and hand hovering over his phone. Deciding he wasn't coming off as needy, at least not too much, he sent you a message quickly before he changed his mind. 

Over in your apartment, the buzz on the counter startled you out of the introspective moment and the text was revealed, words shining up. 

'My dinner sucks. What's yours like?'

'Shit.'

'What are you having?'

'Some crap out of a packet.' Before hitting send, you added another line. 'Want to see it?'

'Not especially (F/N). I expected more from you than crap out of a packet.' 

You laughed, intent on payback and the laptop was brought over, call request sent as you were sure Levi's was still on too. It was, and a slightly disappointed look was given in greeting, cutlery pointed in accusation. 

"You have some good fucking equipment in that kitchen. I suggest you use it."

"But how can you resist this?" Angling down, you gave him an eyeful of the decidedly greyish contents of your bowl, affected gags given in response. 

"What the fuck is that? Is it even legal?"

"Probably not. I'm pretty sure all of it is synthetic."

"That's disgusting (F/N). Stop eating. Now."

"I have, believe me." Laughing at your own stupidity for trusting anything that could only be cooked in the microwave, you grabbed a beer and settled on the sofa, watching as Levi finished his nicer looking meal. "I can leave you in peace?" A muffled cry was heard, fast chews in progress and a hand waved in the air emphatically. 

"No…no don't you dare. You're staying with me until I fucking fall alseep." He didn't care how clingy he sounded now, couldn't give two shits as for once, he'd found someone interesting, enjoyable and attractive. "So you just keep talking."

"Ok, well I have a few stories, care for one whilst you finish that?"

"Please, if you'd be so kind (F/N)." 

Narrating your way through his munches, silly tales from the past were given, eliciting small laughs and nods of appreciation - if he wanted you to talk all night, you would gladly do so; as long as you could be in Levi's presence, you were happy.


	9. One Step Closer

In the end you'd done as requested, spoken until sleep took hold. You kept the laptop on, staring at Levi's slumbering image and the small smile that was still on his lips, peace embodied and you sighed, content that you'd been able to offer companionship from so far away, received it too. Batteries would run out eventually, screens turning to black before morning but for now, you basked in the picture before you. Over twelve hours had been spent together, quality time indeed and any thoughts on how bizarre this may seem had no place in your mind - if this was happiness, then bring it on. 

~~~~~~

By morning you'd been faced with a blank computer of course, no idea when you'd fallen asleep, however you knew there had probably been at least ninety minutes life remaining the last time you were aware of consciousness, lids dropping to the sounds of measured male breaths until you'd drifted away into bliss. 

Scooping cereal into your mouth, you rubbed at the milk dripping down your chin and glanced at the time. Half eight, a respectable hour and it left you with plenty of the day to actually get some much needed housework done. As you crunched through your breakfast, an alert on your phone broke the quiet and you opened the message. 

'How long did you lie there watching me (F/N)?'

'Not sure. Sorry if it was a bit weird. How did you know?'

'I woke up and there you were, sound asleep with your hand on the keyboard.' Oh yea. You'd forgotten about that, a childish stroke to the screen given by way of saying good night which inadvertently seemed to have turned into a hug with an electronic device. 'So you could say we slept together on our first date?' Keeping liquid in your mouth somehow, you swallowed quickly and laughed, head shaken as a reply was formed. 

'You could say that, yes. Who knows what might happen on our second.' You were sure this was going to continue, the constant contact via a variety of different means all adding up to a swiftly solidifying connection and therefore you had no trouble suggesting that this would occur again. 

'I'd imagine marriage would be appropriate.'

'Makes sense Levi, such is the society we live in.' Sudden images crossed your mind of wheeling a laptop on a stick down the aisle, virtual wedding in play and you started to giggle, wishing there was a way to convey that picture sufficiently to him. You needn't have worried.

'I wonder if anyone ever got fucking married over Skype before. We could sell the rights.' Levi smirked as he could see the ridiculous ceremony, dark pyjamas still on as he planned to be indoors all day, rain forbidding much else. 

'They must have. People marry buildings.' 

You left that one hanging and stacked the dishwasher, cleaning products lined up in order of use as you hummed, totally at ease with talking about weddings even if it was in jest; others would have freaked out at the very notion. Black clouds were marching in on the horizon, apartment dull and shadowy so you flicked the lights on, added some much needed illumination and allowing your weekly scrubbing session to be visible. There had been no more messages from Levi's side as you worked at the sink, scourer doing it's job as fizzy kitchen spray was rubbed in circles, your arm getting quite the workout. Maybe he had his own stuff to do, you mused, of course he did - the man wouldn't just sit there and be at your beck and call at all times. 

Levi wasn't having an internal struggle really, just wanted to give you a break and stop pestering you for five minutes. He paced the upper floor of his home, moving sheets and stripping the mattress down, getting on with things he really ought to have done yesterday but there hadn't been time. 

"I can't fucking call her already. Don't be so damn stupid." Mumbling to himself, he secured pillow cases and fluffed the cushions up, far too many for one bed but it gave him a sense of comfort, almost like someone else was there. Loneliness in such a tiny community was common, everyone either married already or not suitable due to compatibility. "Or because you're too bloody grumpy all the time." Self-chastising without much energy, the covers were smoothed down perfectly and the stack of soft items got piled up to almost mountainous proportions that would surely smother him one day. 

In between flurries of activity, you turned and checked your phone that lay dormant on the counter, rubber gloves making it difficult to navigate the screen but the lack of a flashing light was enough to let you know that nothing awaited your attention. 

"Must be busy." Shuffling to attack the floor, you picked up a spray bottle, aiming downwards with a heavy heart as you considered the no doubt steady stream of people that flew past the streets outside. In such a busy city, no one had time for chats and lazy days anymore, all rushing to achieve in their work and social lives, society passing by with haste and goal-driven techniques. Having a job which really stopped there in terms of progression was just what you needed, wages increasing yearly in line with inflation and performance so the need to climb over others to get where you wanted to be seemed foreign, rude almost. "Right…where's the brush?" Talking to your kitchen, cupboards were flung open as the bristled implement eluded you, search underway and a familiar tune started up, making you fly across the room to reach your charging laptop where it lay on the coffee table. Clicking answer, you saw the man you'd watched sleeping, still in his nightwear and slightly flushed looking. 

Levi was greeted by your torso, vest and shorts for slumber in place just like last night but now with the addition of tile cleaner and yellow marigolds. Smirking, he let you sit and get settled, lips twitching as he lounged back. 

"Busy (F/N)?" You'd forgotten about the extra accessories, bottle hastily placed on the floor and gloves pulled off with a slapping sound.

"Sorry, just doing the kitchen. What the hell have you been up to?" Referring to his slightly red cheeks, you smiled and pointed. 

"Nothing much, must've been the sight of you in rubber." 

"It's the colour. No one can resist." Flapping bright material at the screen, you laughed, sending sparks through Levi's body as your light giggles sent him into another plain of existence, eyes nearly closing as he took it all in, combined the sound with the scent he'd memorized as if you were right there before him. The man began to daydream, wondered what it might feel like to be with you, touch you, kiss you…

Carried away and sensing no shame at all, he smiled with genuine pleasure and nodded - despite the long distance, this could work. 

~~~~~~

By Tuesday you were convinced that your relationship with a certain raven haired individual had surpassed any of your former ones, both of you sharing the same enthusiasm and need to connect regularly, neither finding the other overbearing or a nuisance. Sunday had pretty much followed suit from the day of your date, time spent well but doing mundane things like cleaning; everywhere you'd gone in the house, he came with you and vice versa, save for bathroom stops of course. It was like reality without physical proximity, however that added to the deeper element. Things weren't always about a quick grope or thoughtless fumbles. 

The atmosphere at work had been light and enjoyable, quite amusing too as you watched the others attempt to get on with their jobs and refrain from any kind of contact - you hadn't forbidden it or even mentioned their partnership, however behaviour in the office seemed to have been self-dictated by the two. It was sweet at first, but then your mind started to wander, coming to the conclusion that they were loving every second, a drawn out tease of stolen looks and lingering touches. Maybe you were so caught up in your own new found emotions, making up stories in your head that didn't really exist, yet you hoped the supposition was correct. 

"Hey (F/N), wake up." 

You'd been staring out the window at increasingly dark clouds again, waiting with anticipation to share rain as if it were the basis of whatever the pair of you had, a fresh and real thing to revel in. 

"Sorry Jean, I'm awake, honest. This is just my thinking face."

"Well maybe change it, thought we were gonna need medical intervention." 

"Oi! It's not that bad!" Launching the first missile you came across, a paperclip flew towards him, hitting right between the eyes. "Shit Jean! Are you ok?" He'd clutched the offended spot straight away, groan of discomfort more than a little exaggerated and you smirked as the reason became evident. Eren rushed over, peeling Jean's fingers away and staring up earnestly to inspect the damage, brows furrowed in concern. 

"(F/N), you should be more careful." He mumbled quietly, dabbing at a tiny red mark and you saw the taller man hold back a grin, obviously adoring the attention. Shooting him a wink, you watched as he was kissed on the miniscule injury, small show of affection that was instinctive and not thought through. "Umm…" The care giver turned beetroot and gazed to the floor, avoiding eye contact at all costs as his softer side had been revealed, shown to other humans. "I need a piss." He fled, leaving you behind to share a chuckle with Jean - it needed no words, all you had to do was nod to the light haired male and unspoken thoughts were conveyed. They were very happy. 

Miles away, Levi picked at the parcel sitting on his desk, item expertly wrapped in brown packing paper and taped down securely, pointy triangles of the material at each end that were almost identical to one another. This symmetry and care pleased him, attention to detail a much forgotten thing in these times and it almost seemed a shame to destroy such beauty, finger tips running up and down your precise folding. Once again he'd been flirting with opening the package, taunting himself as he had done before, not wanting to peak too soon and ruin the moment. It may have to happen though, Mike's usual visit scheduled in about ten minute's time as his days usually ran like clockwork; get in, open mail, entertain his friend for a while, deliver mail, moan and get frightfully bored. All of that now came with the addition of speaking to you, via text or call, he didn't mind as long as it occurred. 

With a resigned huff, Levi tugged at the selotape, glasses placed to one side as he utilised two hands now, delicately slipping under the sticky seal to open your latest offering. The post mark showed him you'd sent it on Saturday, likely when proceedings were halted by lack of battery and he smiled as the paper was unwound, box within treated gently as denoted by a neat printed word - 'fragile'. Hopefully the delivery guy had stuck to the instruction and been kind. Inside lay a plain cardboard container, no clue as to the contents but the smell…that inimitable aroma which transported him back to a place from earlier years…

"Oh fuck…(F/N), you've outdone yourself." Adept at holding one sided conversations, Levi continued as the lid was lifted, pack of cocoa kisses staring up at him and begging to be used. "I'm going to enjoy you." Sounding like some sort of weird sexual promise, his deep yet sultry voice filled the small room as he sniffed, a squeak of ecstasy accompanying the gesture and it took all of his self control to leave the drink alone, knowing that there was more to be discovered. 

Next came a plastic tub, thin but serviceable and the innards were wrapped in protective tissue, pastel colours matching what they held dear and the man almost mewled with delight, pale digits ghosting over his much loved snack. Eight macaroons sat nestled in their bright shroud, all intact, all perfect and all screaming to be eaten. It was a care package of a different kind, expensive treats instead of tins and dried goods and he almost called you, button about to be pressed until the last thing was noticed. A handwritten note. As if the presents weren't enough, now he had another flowery letter to absorb and at that one moment, all of his thoughts were solidified - surrounded by flavours he could only dream about for what felt like eternity, looking down upon your script…he'd finally found contentment. 

'Dear Levi,

Today we spoke for the first time whilst I was pelted by your storm. I know what I wanted to say about that but it didn't really come out right, so it might be easier to try and explain in writing. Oh, and your recommendation for the food was fucking spot on, it's nearly all gone already. 

Anyway, what I meant was that whilst we may be in totally different places, that rain had fallen on you, came over here then drenched me. In a way it felt like we'd been stood under the same clouds, experienced the same things at the same time. Ok, so that probably didn't come out right either. I'm crazy, deal with it.' 

You'd drawn a quick face at this point, tongue poking out and Levi touched the doodle, feeling where you'd pressed ink into paper and digesting your previous paragraphs. Your explanation was completely understandable, one he'd realised at the time when he'd heard the joy in your voice at being soaked through. Swiftly moving on before he could become a ball of emotional sap, he cleared his throat and retrieved his reading glasses, extra clarity now in your penmanship.

'It was lovely to speak with you, I hope we can do it again some time if you want to? This may come off as a little bit creepy, but I really liked my lunch break today. It'll be one I remember for a long time.

Hoping I haven't scared you off too much, I remain sincerely yours,

(F/N).'

There was something raw and unbound in your writing, a real brain dump of thoughts that couldn't be deleted, couldn't be erased by pressing control and Z, they were out there forever now and emblazoned on his mind for eternity. 

"That wasn't creepy (F/N). Propositioning a pack of tea is fucking creepy." 

Talking out loud, Levi reached over to select a powder pink macaroon, tongue dancing over the soft shell and teeth finally biting down, the combination of a crumbly texture and sumptuous insides doing a myriad of things to him. He leant back, neck stretched and eyes to the ceiling as he slumped down, groans of pleasure in his throat as the substance melted in his warm mouth, delicacy savoured slowly and with reverence. 

"Ah fucking hell…holy shit." Struggling to get up again, the male grabbed his desk for assistance, grip strong as he pulled, body in it's correct position again and he paused, sweet morsel hovering before his open lips as he turned the page over. There was more, a different coloured pen used to suggest this part had been added later on. 

'I hope you like the gifts as much as I liked part one of our date today. It was ridiculously fun to take you on a walk, despite the many strange looks I received. Fuck them, they don't understand. 

Thank you for sharing your past with me, I know you might not want to hear it but I need you to listen to this - what you did for that boy is amazing and please…it wasn't your fault. 

Sorry my battery ran out, but this is just a break I'm sure. See you on the other side.'

It had indeed been only a pause and Levi finished off his confectionary, more gurgles of glee given as he folded your missive away right on time, heart warmed and skipping within his chest like a teen when they saw their first crush smile. Mike walked in, unannounced as always and he caught the strange look on his friend's face, something bordering between happiness and euphoria. 

"You've got crumbs."

"Huh?"

"Pink crumbs Levi. Right there." Tapping the corner of his mouth, the tall man indicated where to wipe and took in a drag of the atmosphere, confusion combining with satisfaction as Levi dabbed with a tissue, ridding himself of careless muck - in his rush to taste the last of your dainty treat, he'd mistakenly left some evidence behind, colourful evidence at that and he tutted at nothing in particular. "Having a good day? It smells like…actually, I don't know what that is." 

"Things far too fine for the likes of you, Mike."

"Is that so?" Orbiting the desk, the one in charge circled and peered down to get a glimpse of what was causing such a lovely cloud for his senses, towering over the person who sat up straight and shuffled papers importantly. 

"Don't fucking loom."

"I can't help being this height." Pinpointing the location to a brown box, a huge hand reached out only to be stopped by a deceptively strong one which clutched tightly to his flesh, flashing silver eyes narrow and piercing into his skull as a dark tone spread over him like ice. 

"You touch, you die."

"Levi…"

"Touch. Die. Simple." 

"Just…"

"Ask again, die. Try me Mike. I haven't killed in a while." 

"Like you've ever killed." Wrenching his arm back, Mike stepped around the room, keeping a watch on the suddenly threatening male - he knew there was nothing but a dramatic imagination at play and smirked. "How would you take me out then?" 

"Slit your throat." Levi answered so swiftly and deadpan that it certainly seemed as if he'd given this prior thought, arms crossed in defiance as he leant back, serious glare looking up from beneath thin brows and his boss laughed. 

"You couldn't reach all the way up here."

"I can fucking climb." Remaining stony, the challenger held in a small laugh and shrugged. "Might take me a week but I'll get there." The man with dirty blonde hair couldn't contain himself anymore, guffaws loud and pure as a faint twitch of a smile met his hilarity. 

"Ok, you got me." Palms up, he surrendered to his fate and moved on. "Game tonight?" 

"Let me check…yup, sorry, no can do. I have assassin's school at seven, organ removal class at eight and then fucking needlepoint at nine."

"If you don't want to, just say Levi."

"Oh I want to. I'll rather enjoy taking all of your money again."

"It's a date." 

Leaving the odd but amusing mail worker behind, Mike ascended with a grin, the same perfume as before tickling his nostrils - he'd be getting some answers later after alcohol had loosened Levi's tongue. 

While he still had time, pale hands sourced paper and a pen, a reply composed that would hopefully reach you before Friday. Any later, and it would all be ruined.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now I want a macaroon...


	10. Significance

Thursday arrived with wind and rain, sideways droplets pelting your coat as you rushed back from an early lunch break, hunger not allowing you to wait until midday. The boys didn't mind, way too busy in the back room doing whatever the fuck they did in there and you shook down once inside, water spraying in all directions as you hung your outerwear on a peg, tangled hair run through before eating. At the desk which no one normally used, one which had become your kind of base now, the sandwich was unwrapped and you ate with urgency, stomach thanking you as the latest letter from Levi lay in front of your gaze. It arrived this morning but the instructions on the back demanded no opening until lunch had been had, orders queried by text. All that resulted in was a smug sense of knowing from the man and you gave up in the end, turning to your usual chat instead. 

Swallowing the last bit down, you swiftly tore into your missive and read with as much speed as your meal had been dispatched, eyes starved and needing to see what awaited. 

'Dearest (F/N),

I did understand what you meant about the rain and it wasn't crazy, was actually kind of sweet and trust me, I never call anything fucking sweet so feel honoured. Also, may I say it was equally enjoyable spending that day with you, and all the other times we've spoken since, even if you did hug your laptop *cough weirdo cough*'

His little doodle appeared to be a laughing face but again, it wasn't entirely discernable and you smiled, tracing the lines in unintentional imitation of his own actions when your last letter had reached him. 

'Moving on, thank you. You have no idea how much of a blessing your gifts were. That pissy little office has never smelt so delicious or tasted so good, and I have no trouble telling you that I almost ate the whole pack in one go. I know I thanked you already, but my actual speech is perhaps a little less eloquent in comparison to when I have the time to think and write before shit comes out. And (F/N)? I know you have your own little stash of that tea, sneaky devil. 

So my next 'gift', if you see it that way, is this - on the back, you'll find a list. A shopping list to be more precise. If you're free on Saturday night (which I know you are because I already asked you), would you care to cook dinner with me? I can show you some moves, introduce you to your kitchen again because (F/N)? The only thing I've seen you eat was fucking abhorrent and for that, you deserve punishment - a master class with the grumpy ass chef himself. 

Yours with unending gratitude for not calling the police on the weird stalker who keeps bothering you,   
Levi

PS when I say 'tomatoes', get some good fuckers. None of that cheap shit. Nice big round juicy tomatoes.'

Giggling at his enthusiasm over a salad item, you turned the sheet to see what awaited you, comprehensive list annotated with more instructions around purchasing the correct produce. Some scribbles suggested the exact colour for certain things, others apologised for the cost, only top grade ingredients need apply. A herd of butterflies invaded your stomach, spilled upwards until your chest felt like it would explode in excitement - this would be incredible. 

Bangs and the sound of a strained machine filtered through, Eren's shriek of rage accompanying the deafening noise and Jean emerged, head shaking slowly but smile on his face. 

"(F/N), you'd better get in there. I think he's gonna punch it."

"No worries. You get off, you've got an exam to do!" All of his studies were coming to a head, coursework completed and the final test was almost upon him, day up until now spent as normal to try and allay any nerves. As usual, your friend waved it off, fear or trepidation dismissed with a superior air. 

"Ha, I'll ace that shit. Just you see." 

"I know you will Jean. But being late won't help! Now go! Scoot!" 

"One sec." He rushed over, kiss on your cheek like a lucky talisman and you gave him a squeeze, not saying 'good luck' as that would be scoffed at. The tall male ran into the back room, presumably a steamier farewell shared and he sped out, bag over one shoulder as he shot you finger-guns. Taking his advice, you went to check on Eren, hoping a fist fight wasn't taking place with metal and cogs. 

"Hey, everything…" Your query was cut short by a shape flying towards you, brunette attached in a bear hug and enveloping your form. "Eren? What's wrong?" His face was buried in your hair, voice muted yet light. 

"Thank you."

"For what? Hey, I can't breathe here!" The hold lessened and he leant back, hands on your shoulders and the biggest grin you'd ever seen was plastered on the man's tanned face. 

"For the advice (F/N). If you hadn't sat me down and called bull on my moaning, we'd…I'd…this." He gestured at the exit, last known place of his new boyfriend. "It never would have happened."

"It's my pleasure Eren." Smiling widely, you saw genuine joy in emerald eyes and nodded. "Going well?"

"Oh (F/N) you have no idea. It's amazing, he can be so adorable and thoughtful. All of that macho shit is just a front."

"I can tell by the way he looks at you."

"Huh?" Eren stepped back, blush on his cheeks and gaze shocked. 

"Can't you see it? Eren, you guys are just too cute." 

He seemed to struggle then, caught between wanting to enthuse over his relationship and chastise you for deeming them 'cute'. The former won, work forgotten as you sat on temporary chairs made from boxes, listening intently to your friend's heart warming stories. 

~~~~~~

"No, not that one. Jesus…there. On the right."

"This?"

"That's left, (F/N)."

"Sorry." 

Shopping with Levi was like a military drill, orders given through your earpiece as if a commander was barking instructions on a tannoy. Selecting the correct item, you made sure your phone was secured sufficiently, case with a built in clip allowing hands free travels as you walked around the supermarket complete with a frowning face attached to your coat. 

The man sat back, glass of wine sipped as he followed your progress, wondering what you looked like striding the aisles with his head glaring out. He could have some fun, he mused. Freak other shoppers out with expressions or the middle finger, things you wouldn't be able to see. Spotting a likely target, he spoke quietly as if the elderly lady by the cheeses could hear his approach. 

"(F/N)? Over there."

"Oh yea, hang on." One ingredient had been forgotten from this area and you swooped, bent over to search for prime produce, oblivious to the potential insult that was in the making. "How about this?"

"What's that, dear?" You looked up, face to face with a fellow purchaser and an apologetic smile crossed your lips, earbud pointed at and cable waggled. 

"Sorry! I'm on a call, didn't mean to bother you."

"You kids today, always some new technology that I wouldn't have a hope of mastering." The woman grinned, shared laughs soft as the awkward moment was styled out and you added to your groceries, vaguely aware of a change in her features when she glanced down. It didn't look jovial and you sped away, tone low. 

"What did you do to her, Levi?" Unclasping your phone, you gave a serious glare to the smug man, trying your best to hold in giggles. Levi took a slow drink, silver eyes flashing with mischief and you saw the smile he hid behind the glass, tiny shrug offered in response. 

"Just saying hello. Making new friends."

"Yea ok. I saw her face."

"Maybe don't bump into her again (F/N). Might be for the best." 

The rest of your trip was uneventful and by the time you returned home, your feet were throbbing and bones aching, food stashed away and shoes kicked to one side. Levi was still with you, conversation not yet over and you flopped to the couch, turning the screen and watching him speak. Even such a simple thing like seeing his lips move was enchanting, a person whose written words had gotten you caught up in this and now you could experience actual vocalizations, physical sights shared and you felt a sudden sharp pull, a deep longing to be in his actual company. 

He paused, looking at the strange expression he held in one palm, a beautiful and wistful combination which both confused and excited him, as if some kind of realisation had been reached. 

"(F/N)?"

"Mmm?"

You were staring at one another, breaths shallow as two minds tried to make sense of what was happening, a sort of epiphany which hit the pair of you hard. There wasn't a way to express the feeling inside of you right now, an odd warmth that would be done a disservice if you'd tried. This was not love, even you weren't that clingy, but it most certainly lived somewhere on the outskirts of such an emotion. Admiration, comfort and ease. Perhaps those fit the bill better, yet they still wouldn't come close to the sensation in the pit of your stomach. 

Levi blinked slowly, a silent bond created as your thoughts matched each other's perfectly, just as they had done when you'd been stood laughing in the rain - you didn't need to expand upon this and smiles crept over your lips, two people firmly on the same page and in deeper than could ever have been predicted. 

"Did you get the right fucking oil?" 

The man broke your reverie expertly, cheeky raise of a brow questioning your shopping abilities and you began to giggle, face lit up and animated. Good. That was what he'd been aiming for, a gorgeous display which he struggled to not join in with, remaining as stern as possible. He failed, own chuckles hearty and you laughed harder; not at him or the silly joke, but the way such an often moody individual was changed so drastically by this display. He calmed quickly, eye dabbed at with a knuckle and Levi let out a sigh, settled back into his sofa and completely whole for once in his life. If this was what you could do to him on the phone, it meant that if…no, WHEN you met, he'd be fucked. 

~~~~~~

You spent Friday in a haze, a kind of stupor that was born from yesterday evening's call, one which had extended to Skype and falling asleep together again. It was the second time you'd done so, but it felt sweeter last night, more true and the repercussions were your current dopey grin and far-away look. The others had noticed the way you floated through the day but made no mention - it was clear to see that despite your unconventional means, happiness had been attained, something not to be mocked or scoffed at. Jean stood with his arms loosely around Eren's waist from behind, both looking over at how you stared into the dark sky, wondering what was going through your head. The unusual quiet was the stuff of dreams; no machines, no stamps beating their metal rhythm, just simple heavenly bliss. 

It ceased all too soon, lazy afternoon pierced by an annoying sound and two sets of eyes flicked round, tallest man blushing as he pulled his mobile out. 

"Oh shit…results."

"It'll be ok babe. Just answer." Eren squeezed his partner's hand and Jean ran to the corridor, all of his bravado gone and preferring to take the call in private. The remaining workers shared a serious but hopeful glance, not speaking and waiting for the news - of course he'd pass, he put more effort in than had been admitted. Seconds ticked by with agonisingly slow speed and the brunette chewed his finger nails, biting down instinctively to alleviate stress. You weren't kept for long, slumped figure scuffing back in with his head down. He was psyching you out, playing the 'oh I failed' card only to jump around in glee. Wasn't he?

"Guys?" Dramatic pause as everyone held their breaths. "I…" Sigh. He was definitely playing the card and your lips twitched, anticipating the next line which did not disappoint. "I got 98%! Only needed 75 to pass!" Cheers erupted as the men embraced, bouncing up and down and you grinned, clapping along with their happiness. "Come on (F/N), get involved!" A hand was held out and you raced in, three way hug in progress as Jean's success was shared.

A buzzing at your leg interrupted the moment and you gave an apologetic look, one which was waved away instantly - the more people who knew of his triumph, the better. A video call awaited and you picked up with a swipe, breaking away from the scrum. 

"Hey!" 

"I presume by all the noise that he passed?"

"He did!"

"Yo Levi!" The others bundled over, now acquainted with the face on screen from all the times you'd spoken at work. 

"Congratulations are in order I see?"

"Damn straight! Fucking maxed that shit!" Eren elbowed his boyfriend, nods and gestures exchanged and Levi tutted. 

"Is this some sort of shitty sign language?"

"Well…" The tallest started, followed up by the second male. 

"We're going out tonight to celebrate, (F/N) too obviously. Wanna come?" Inviting a cell phone to the pub seemed a tad strange, but given how they'd seen you acting recently, it made sense. "If that's ok?"

You nodded but turned to the image before you, silent and empty office so different to your current climate - it might be nice for him to 'get out' once in a while. Lifted brows queried as your friends made themselves scarce, not wanting to get in the way of your private discussion. 

"What do you say?"

Levi pursed his lips with affected concentration, head tilted and he pushed his glasses up, sombre stare shining up at your expectant gaze. 

"I suppose it couldn't hurt (F/N). Just make sure no one starts on the shots. I can't be fucked with a messy night."

"I'll make no promises on their part Levi, but rest assured, I'm sticking to beer."

"You have yourself a deal." He looked to the side, small sigh pushed from seemingly weary lungs and he mumbled quietly. "Ready to meet Mike?"

"The famous man who you bleed dry of money on a weekly basis? Hell yes." 

"Good. I'll take my tablet though, his nose won't fit in the fucking screen." 

It wasn't a bad idea actually and you imagined sitting in a bar with your laptop, not quite the portable companion and you frowned. 

"I can borrow one?"

"Do it. More chance of actually being able to see you."

A short discussion later and you'd ended the call, Eren's device successfully on loan and spirits running high - an evening out to meet the friends. Things were getting amusingly serious.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, hope you're enjoying my romantic escapade! 
> 
>  
> 
> zedsdead1001.tumblr.com


	11. Night Out

A quiet bar had been chosen and three of you sat huddled together on one side of the table, cushioned bench comfortable and the outdoors seating area was bathed in the red glow from heaters above, cold evening air a forgotten thing under the warmth. The currently dormant tablet was propped up before you all, screen awaiting a call and Eren laughed. 

"This is fucking weird."

"You get used to it."

"Do you guys talk like this all the time, (F/N)?"

"Pretty much."

Nerves on edge, you chugged down some beer and jiggled your leg in anticipation, unsure what to expect from this multi-way conversation. Sure, it was normal for Levi and you now, however the additional participants were about to step into your world, join in with what you found to be a way of becoming closer and they were in danger of witnessing first hand how stupidly gushy you could get when in a certain man's virtual presence. Tomorrow's cooking event caused sparks of excitement still, ingredients at home just waiting to be put to good use. In private. Whilst this may have seemed a fantastic idea earlier, now you had some reservations. 

Any chance to question the event was blown away as an alert flashed up, tablet owner bolting forwards to answer the call. 

"How drunk are you? I need to adjust my tolerance levels accordingly." Levi had aimed that directly at the men, silver eyes flashing as he leant in, obscuring his friend. 

"We're fine, thank you." Jean drained his bottle, belch hidden behind a hand and he smiled. "For now." 

"Hmm. Ok. We have some catching up to do." The pale man sat back, revealing who you presumed to be Mike and your gaze flicked sideways, trained on the left side of the rectangular display as you grinned, small smirk given back which conveyed greetings and thoughts without words. The feelings of realisation from your recent conversation were running strong, stares locked in silent appreciation and Levi raised his glass of scotch, ice cubes tinkling and whilst he spoke to the group, he only had eyes for you. "Congratulations." More drinks were held up whilst the well-wishes were shared around, Jean beaming with pride as a wet kiss was placed on his cheek from the brunette. 

"So, who's this?"

"Eren, Mike. Mike, this is Eren, Jean and (F/N)." 

The one introduced loomed close, confusion on his visible features and you frowned, noting the pained expression as he shrank away again, arms crossed in a kind of huff. They appeared to be inside, faint murmurs of chatter in the background and decor traditional, the sort of pub which was found in more rural locations. The others waved kindly, slightly put off by the odd 'hello' and you sat up, beckoning Levi. He did as asked, two faces meeting at the screen and you whispered. 

"Why does he look constipated?" 

"Ah. Well, Mike is at a slight disadvantage here." 

"How do you mean?"

"He works from his sense of smell usually and…" A hand was waved at the tablet. "This doesn't lend itself to that kind of thing." He could see you were still at a loss and turned to his friend, palm out and asking for permission. It was granted with a nod and Mike looked off into the distance, childish strop still in force. You could see why they got along. "He's deaf. Not completely, always manages to hear my fucking gripes but with the noise here and speaking over a connection which may or may not cut out any second, it puts him in a position."

"Oh fuck, sorry Mike." Your voice was made clearer this time to account for the disability and a shrug came in response, male now facing you again. 

"Not your fault (F/N). Blame shitty machinery."

"What happened?" 

He was staring at your mouth, at least you thought so anyway - it was hard to tell from behind all the shaggy hair. 

"I worked in a saw mill. Goddamn thing was so loud, most of us lost at least part of our hearing." He finished his drink, receptacle placed down and he shrugged again. "It was a while ago, I've adjusted."

"Maybe if he didn't blind himself by hair, he might get on a little better." Eren's low mumble did not go unnoticed, huge man on the other end stiffening as he placed palms on the table. 

"I might be deaf but I can still lip read." 

Standing, Mike strode off to the bar and your friend blushed deeply. Levi shook his head and pointed to the side. 

"Don't worry. He'll be fine after another. Here." Gentle hands picked up the device and three of you watched closely, surroundings revealed to be just as imagined - an old-style inn with the same low beams as the guide's home, horseshoes tacked on walls and plates lined up on shelves. About eight patrons filled the space, all glancing over and holding up a two fingered salute or giving a nod in recognition, country politeness seeming so quaint and inimitable in your locale. The tall male was speaking to the barmaid, flirting if his body language was anything to go by and you laughed. 

"Seems fine already! Levi, that place looks lovely. I bet they do really good food." 

"It's not bad. If you like lumpy mash and undercooked chicken." Grumbling lowly, Levi returned the tablet to its prior position, face to face again with a sigh. "So that's that. The only pub in the village. This is why I usually fucking drink indoors." 

To you, it remained a warm and inviting premises, somewhere that people knew your name and cared. Swallowing back envy, you smiled as Mike reappeared, two shorts of whiskey delivered and Eren spoke with slight embarrassment. 

"Sorry dude. I didn't mean to be such a dick."

"Ah, forgotten already. So, what are you guys drinking?" 

"Nothing right now." Jean waved an empty bottle, hint strong and his partner picked up on the gesture instantly, almost tripping over himself to comply with the man of the hour's wishes as he sped inside. 

"You've trained him well."

"Thanks Levi. I try." Bursting with pride, the man by your side grew taller and grinned, winking at the screen with smug satisfaction. You knew he'd be apologising unnecessarily later, making sure he hadn't offended his new boyfriend so the show of manliness simply made you chuckle. The second of their pair arrived back surprisingly quickly, a relatively empty establishment a rarity in the city but you weren't complaining, fresh beer received with thanks and six small glasses were lined up, moved from tray to table with care. 

"Oh fuck me, I said no shots."

"Lighten up Levi. We're celebrating. Get involved." Eren's emerald eye winked and grey ones rolled, unexpected movement from Levi's side. 

"Mike don't, you'll fucking throw up…shit."

"What?"

"He's buying shots now. I hope you're happy (F/N)?"

"Me?" Smiling widely, you gave a innocent look to the man glaring over across wifi. "I did nothing."

"Are there or are there not two glasses of sambuca in front of you?"

"How did you know what it was?"

"Standard." Sniffing, the man sighed and stared off to his left, fake annoyance in play but internally he wanted to laugh, rather enjoying the impromptu evening which was about to become messy. The other brought four tiny offerings over, large hands making them seem like cups for dolls and he slumped back down, first drink in the air. Everyone followed suit, a small tut of distaste from Levi that made you giggle, toast going to the tallest of your city gang. 

"To me!" You elbowed Jean, jokingly admonishing his self absorption and clear liquid was thrown back in tandem, five people so far apart being brought together by harsh spirits. Shivers and cries of disgust ensued, a slight gag from Eren as all of you made a variety of faces. 

"Fuck me that is disgusting." 

"One more left to go Levi!" Mike slapped his companion on the back, hearty thumps causing the smaller man to jolt forwards and he mumbled something derogatory, voice too low to be picked up. Glasses high, your still coughing colleague took on the next thing to cheer about. 

"To (F/N) and Levi and whatever bizarre kind of relationship they have!" 

Sniggers and jeers met the suggestion but you all downed the second shot, two of you maintaining eye contact as neither yours nor Levi's expressions changed, leaving the stuck out tongues and closed lids to the rest. That connection was maintained as a deep purr came through crystal clear. 

"Tell me Eren, do you know Jean's favourite colour?" A pained nod, vomit-session imminent. "His birthday? Proudest moment? What he's done with his life up until this point? What type of fucking face cream he uses at night?" 

"Umm…"

"I know all of these things about (F/N) and more. The same applies to what she knows about me. So if that's bizarre, then call me strange. I don't give a shit." No one spoke, all digesting the facts and you gazed intently into steely orbs, ones which were speckled with white as a smile twitched on his lips. The moment was broken by an uncontrollable retch, brunette finally overcome as he bent to allow sambuca to be ejected. 

"Quality work Eren. I like you already." The blonde on the other end laughed, sounds of nausea even reaching his flawed ears and Jean rubbed circles on his partner's thigh in support, saying out loud what everyone was thinking. 

"So when are you guys gonna actually meet?" 

You froze, a strong desire to suggest tomorrow dancing in your mouth but you didn't want to come across too enthusiastic in company, kept that for private conversations and Levi simply pinned you down with that stare, sly smirk now creeping up on him. Mike answered for you both. 

"When this one can get his shit together and book a bus ticket."

"Bus?!" Eren was upright again, both males by your side in shock at the method of travel. 

"Yup. No mainline trains out here in the sticks. Six hours of frequent stops on a fucking stinky crowded bus."

"Oh my god, no wonder you haven't done that yet!"

"I could be persuaded Jean." 

You still held an unwavering gaze, thoughts mirroring the one you faced - six hours walking over hot coals even sounded just fine too and your skin became pink, tinted with visions of actually being able to put your hands on this man. Levi was similarly minded, images of running fingers through (h/c) hair and stroking your soft cheek. 

"Ohhhh…oh fuck, they're having a thing here. Guys? Do we need to leave you to it? Is shit gonna go down?"

Snapping out of the trance, you punched Jean in the arm, eliciting a squeak of pain. 

"No, shit is not going down. Now shut up and drink your beer." You winked back to the pale man, knowing it was only a matter of organisation and holiday allowance before you could finally be physically together - patience was running thin on both sides. 

The night progressed with something of an alcohol exploration theme, Mike having taken the helm as he started off a myriad of different beverages to try, challenging those far away to participate and when eleven o'clock arrived, you were all pretty wasted, time called and respective journeys made in the direction of home. Eren and Jean ensured you reached your building first and the connection was severed, farewells given to his tablet that consisted of slurred words and air kisses, mainly from the huge male who had a thick arm wrapped around a decidedly ill looking Levi. 

Inside, you navigated furniture and grabbed some water, trying to match the amount of strong substances in your belly and flush it out - attempting to sleep now would only result in a spinning room and certain sickness. After a shower and giving your teeth a vigorous brushing, you felt a little less like death and nursed a coffee, lying back in bed and mulling over your last minute night out. It was fun to see Levi in company, his same mumbled insults and moans just as adorable and you smiled, content with what had been referred to as a bizarre relationship - at least this time it seemed to be with someone who reciprocated your enthusiasm. 

Just as the prospect of slumber became a reality, your phone buzzed with an incoming video call and you picked up swiftly, bleary eyes meeting your surprisingly fresh appearance. 

"How are you not hanging over a fucking toilet bowl right now (F/N)?" 

"Skill, Levi. I have ways."

"Care to share? Because I'm sure this isn't finished yet." Telling him of your routine, one which had been employed many a time in your reckless past, he nodded slowly and slumped onto his pillow, raven hair dishevelled and face tinged with red. "Fuck, I can't get up again. Help." 

You spent around another hour conversing with drunken words, your power of speech still not exactly in peak condition and rest had been suggested, 'good nights' spoken softly and you watched as silver disappeared under weary lids. 

"Hey (F/N)?"

"Uh huh?"

"Six hours isn't that bad. Fancy a visitor?"

"You mean it?" Wide awake now, you sat up and clutched your phone, hoping this wasn't the drink talking. 

"Fuck yes. I can't stand it anymore. I need to see you." 

"We can go on a proper tour, yea?"

"Definitely. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go and rid myself of some more stomach lining then sleep. Sweet dreams (F/N)."

"And to you."

No solid plans had been made but it was going to happen. Hopefully soon. 

~~~~~~

"Slice. No, thinner, like this."

Inspecting the laptop, you paid attention as deft cuts were made, Levi's kitchen becoming yours and pans sizzled, food cooking and wine on the go. Sobriety had been attained at some point this afternoon and a place where the drink could be stomached was reached, most of the day spent with one another again. No more had been said on the subject of meeting, issue avoided unintentionally but always at the back of your thoughts. 

"Ok. Ready to add it in (F/N)?"

"Ready." 

Simultaneously, the next ingredient was included and a splash of activity burst in both pots, satisfaction on your face as the same result was shared. 

"Right. We've got ten minutes." Levi leant against the counter, casual as anything as he stared directly at you, voice bored and tired. "Can you get a week off next month?"

"Eh?" 

"For my visit. That is if you'll still have me?"

"Of course I will! I mean…you're sure you want to? My apartment isn't exactly spacious." 

Bringing up the unspoken query on where he'd be staying, you hoped to remain seamless and unflustered but he saw straight through that, ignoring it though so as not to make you uncomfortable. 

"It'll be fine. Nice and cosy." 

That confirmed it, individual happy to be invited into your home - you were adults after all. 

"True." Stirring absent mindedly, you smiled. "I could come to you?"

"Next time (F/N). I need a break from this fucking backwater town. Driving me crazy. Do you know, five people knocked on my door today?"

"Why?"

"Asking about you. Bunch of nosey inbreds." Word had spread quickly, pub's events shared amongst locals and you stifled a giggle. "Don't laugh. When you do come here, they'll all want to meet you and trust me, it'll be some painful shit." 

"I can cope if it's worth my while."

"Oh, I'll make it worth your while alright." 

The air was thick with intent, things stepping up a gear as the imminent trip approached; it wasn't like you were going to ask Levi to sleep on the couch. 

"Really?" Elbows on the surface, you placed your chin in palms and tilted your head, close to the screen with a slightly open mouth. "And how exactly do you intend to do that?" Grey eyes flicked down, your stance well planned as now he had a screen full of cleavage and you swore the man stuttered. 

"W-with my amazing charm of course. These words aren't just for anyone (F/N). You get the full force of me."

"Well in that case, sign me up. I can't wait to experience your full force." 

Electricity sparked in your kitchens, sexual tension running high and Levi wondered how long he could hold out, next month seeming so very far away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've always wanted a reason for Mike's sense of smell so decided to do just that!


	12. Within Reach

A silly note had been posted, something innocent yet meaningful and you felt giddy every time Levi contacted you, sure it was to speak about your letter. Days off from work were arranged, leave booked and now both of you had merely half a week to wait until the grand event - after that, a fortnight would follow in which you could enjoy one another's company, do what you currently only dreamt about and finally hold the man close as desired, feel his warmth and bask in real flesh. It was hard to believe that nearly a month had passed since the meeting had been discussed, excruciating passage of time making it seem like years but you'd kept in contact daily as always, more suggestive discussions commonplace. 

Levi had a similar sensation of nerves, not about his trip but the missive he'd sent yesterday, hoping it would reach you before he did. Words often failed him, so writing it down made sense, envelope sealed while he still had the guts to mail the damn thing. Bags were packed, enough belongings for his stay along with gifts and every single letter he'd received from you - the aim was to bring them together, read over the beginnings of your relationship as a pair and laugh about how ridiculous your behaviour had been. With a small smile, Levi pushed his glasses back up his nose and set about slicing through today's tiny pile of correspondence. 

A certain package stood out but he didn't rush, simply took his time and got to your familiar writing in turn, paper carefully unstuck and he brought out a single sheet, one with no words or ink. All that sat on his new prize was a deep red imprint, your lips having been painted in luscious colour before pressing deeply against the foolscap and the man laughed once, recalling your comment the other day around how you'd be leaving your mark on him. And here it was already, pout perfectly preserved on the white substance. Serious consideration was held along the lines of kissing your ruby offering, however Levi held off, not wanting to seem like a teen rubbing up against a poster of their favourite celebrity. 

"Jesus (F/N)…you wait. Just you wait. This weekend is going to be fucking incredible." 

"Ah, another love letter I see?"

"Piss off Mike and get your own life." 

"Have one. Rather happy with it, thanks." The huge male took his usual seat on the desk's edge, furniture once more protesting under the weight of over six feet of manliness and he gave a loud chuckle. "Levi, you're blushing."

"No I'm fucking not."

"Yes you are. What are you going to be like on Saturday?"

Silver eyes glared up as the paper was folded with care, kiss placed in his pocket and away from a prying gaze. 

"I'll be fine Mike."

"Whatever you say. Just don't fuck it up."

"Why would I?"

"I dunno, maybe your glowing and friendly disposition might be a bit too much?" Sarcasm dripped from the blonde's mouth and he grinned. "But I guess she knows what she's in for, right?"

"Damn straight." 

"That is if you even get there, Levi."

An unseasonably cold snap had hit, a good seven weeks until Christmas but a snowy storm was battering the coastal town, moving it's way across the country with slow intent and practically following his intended route, due to dump white crystal ice on the city he would be headed for. 

Miles away, you opened your own mail, hidden behind the computer screen for some reason - the guys knew who it was from, how committed you both were to making something of this despite the distance, but to scurry away made it feel all the more delicious, a secret just between the two of you. Elegant writing was presented, neat lines as always and you started to read with hunger. 

'Dearest (F/N),

As you may be aware, my way with words can border on the blunt and offensive, so I find it easier to write this shit down. 

I've never met anyone like you. Hell, I've never even met YOU actually, but you know what I mean. 

When we're together, I feel alive. All of the dreary humdrum life around me (self imposed, I'm a hypocrite) seems brighter, colours more vivid and people relatively bearable. You've made me a better person (F/N). Allowed me to show emotion and not be afraid of it. Fuck, that sounds terrible. But it's the truth. Now, before I turn into a total mess, I have to say that when we meet on Saturday, I truly feel that my purpose in life will have been attained. Or some romantic shit like that. I really don't do well with this kind of thing, forgive me. 

In conclusion, (F/N) - I can't fucking wait to have you in my arms. 

Yours with painful anticipation,

Levi.

PS please ignore everything I wrote, I sound like an absolute idiot. 

PPS actually don't ignore it. It's true.'

Snow began to float down outside, white flakes that fluttered and spun in the wind - not enough to settle yet, but the clouds promised a thicker deluge soon and you watched their hypnotic travels with a lump in your throat. Eren glanced across, the day's mail already scanned and tidied away and he frowned, noted the way you clutched onto a letter with tight fists and saw tears spilling over your cheeks. 

"(F/N)? What's wrong?" He was by your side, squeezed onto the seat with you and palm on the small of your back in support; he swore that if your 'boyfriend' had caused you pain, he would happily tear the guy apart, limb from limb. You couldn't speak at first, voice not functioning so only a squeak came out, mouth working uselessly. Green eyes stared back with concern and you did the only thing possible - handed Eren the paper. 

He looked confused at first but soon bowed his head, lips moving as he took in the words, words which were meant for you but to try and explain how your heart was about to melt wouldn't quite cut it. You trusted the brunette to keep this to himself, be gentle with your emotions and sensitive to your plight, and sure enough, he did all of those things. 

"Oh…oh fuck, that is…I don't know what to say…it's beautiful." You gave a tiny laugh and more water dripped from your eyes, happy tears running free as Eren continued. "Not exactly Shakespeare, but I get the intent."

You suddenly threw yourself into the man's chest, concealing silly sobs and hugging tight, unsure how to really respond to Levi's gift - you'd call him tonight, when you'd calmed down enough to be coherent. That pang of doubt which hit everyone at some point had crept in too though, a nagging belief that perhaps the other person wouldn't like you or think this had all been a bad idea from the start; if anyone said they always felt confident in matters of the heart, they'd be lying. Despite all of your self assurances to the contrary, nerves had kicked in and you sat back, wet eyes finding soft emerald. 

"Eren? What if…"

"No. Don't even start that crap (F/N)."

"Huh?" He'd locked you down with one of your own special glares and you gaped. "You don't know what I was going to even say?"

"Yes I do. Now look." He flapped the letter for emphasis. "People don't write this if they don't mean it. And besides, he would be honoured to have you by his side."

"Now I know you're teasing, Eren."

"I'm serious." Your friend certainly looked it, and you relaxed slightly. "If it wasn't for you, I'd never have found my happiness. You can smell bullshit a mile away and aren't afraid to call it. So take some of that experience and intuition and turn it around." You remained quiet, smiles spreading across both of your faces.

"Ok. Bet you think you're clever, right?"

"No (F/N). I know I am." Giving him a small, gentle slap to the arm, the pair of you giggled. 

"How's it all going with you two?"

"Perfect." He had a far away look, wistful and pure and you thanked just how lucky your little group were.

~~~~~~

Friday night saw you lying in bed, Levi's peaceful image on the pillow beside you as your late conversation came to an inevitable end. His missive and the one he'd received had already been discussed, not in too much depth as the man became decidedly shy when the subject was brought up two days ago. Leaving it instead at heartfelt thanks, the time had marched on until you found yourselves one sleep away from meeting, thick snow now falling outside your open curtains. 

"You sure it's safe Levi?"

"I promise you (F/N), it's gonna take more than some shitty snow to stop me getting to you."

"I'm worried." 

Chewing at you bottom lip, a million scenarios danced through your mind, all with disastrous consequences. The male on the other end sighed, enjoying the adorable frown on your face and he reached out, fingers touching the screen.

"Don't be. Before you know it, I'll be there and you can't do a damn thing about it now."

You mirrored his gesture, attempting touch across a visual call and you allowed yourself a smirk. 

"I'd never dream of doing anything about it."

A quiet moment was shared, hands outstretched and connected virtually. Eventually, wishes were given and farewells whispered, a new addition this time causing spirals of excitement. 

"Night (F/N)."

"Night Levi. Sleep well."

"And you. See you tomorrow."

~~~~~~

A joint decision had been made to keep communication at a bare minimum today, only updates on the journey to be explained - anything else you wanted to say could be done in person. Levi was due to arrive at the main bus station just past six in the evening, city now shrouded in white dust and you knew that would spell delays. Hopefully the driver was savvy enough to take it easy, not speed through his trip like a mad man; as much as you wanted to shorten the length of time between now and that moment, you also wanted him to get here in one piece. 

The traveller was busy checking his items over, case opened and closed, opened and closed, last minute things added and rearranged. 

"I don't need fucking shoe polish. They have stores there." 

Discarding the useless tub, Levi sighed and ran faintly shaking hands through raven hair, anxiety eating away at his soul as his departure time seemed to take forever to come round. He just wanted to get on the damn bus, start closing the gap between you both and begin the long yet worthwhile trek across the country. Pacing, the man's black boots clunked on floorboards, sound muted as he traversed softer rugs then back to heavy thuds when wood was reached again - inclement weather called for appropriate footwear. The storm had finished here, leaving behind slippery ice and slush and he needed a good grip for the short walk to pick up his first ride. 

More circuits were being taken in your apartment, checking everything over and making sure it was presentable for company. You'd been up since the crack of dawn, tidying and cleaning, nothing half-assed though; the microwave had even been pulled out, a sure sign of a deep and thorough scrub, all of your efforts now resulting in a gleaming home fit for a king. 

"Shopping."

The next item on your agenda was upon you, time to stock the cupboards and fridge with ingredients that would be merged to create a feast, one cooked together in person finally and your skipping heart sent you floating out of the building, hoodie pulled up and topped off with a huge coat. Thoughts turned onto the subject of what to wear, wardrobe mentally scoured for a warm yet nice ensemble. Whilst it wouldn't be first impressions, you still wanted to look your best and ran through options as you skidded towards the store. 

After an hour of meticulous buying and a conversation with an overly excitable Eren, you'd stacked your kitchen neatly, all produce safely away and mind intent on running a bath, have a nice soak to warm you up.

Levi stood in the cold wind, hair assaulted by squally gusts as his usually pale complexion was tinged with red, the elements battering his exterior and he checked his watch impatiently. Great start. The connection which would take him to the next stop and a larger selection of destinations was late, cutting his interchange tight and he honestly believed it was all totally fucked. 

"Typical. Can't just run on fucking time, can they. Bunch of pricks." Freezing lips moved in a low mumble and the man pulled his long dark coat around him, garment doing nothing to provide adequate protection. He sensed an incoming figure and sighed. "Not again." As was the norm, gossip had spread like wild fire and once more he'd been the topic of conversation recently, all of the villagers nosey enough to barge their way into his personal life and ask too many questions. "If the goddamn bus came when it should, this wouldn't be happening."

"You knew it would be late, Levi."

"Mike, don't. I'm pissed enough as it is without you coming up and bothering me."

"It was merely an observation." The large male smiled, meaty hand on his friend's shoulder. "You'll be fine. I know how you work."

"How so?"

"I'm betting you have at least an hour between getting there and picking up the next one."

"Fuck off. I only have forty five minutes." Staring out to sea, grey eyes watched the turmoil and heard waves crashing into man-made defences, a sometimes soothing sound which right now he wanted to be a million miles from, caught up instead in the noisy metropolis you called home. Mike laughed, smug that he could read his comrade like a book and he pointed. 

"See? Here it is." 

A blue and somewhat tired looking coach arrived, brakes protesting against the slippery surface as the practically empty ride pulled up. 

"Well, I would say I'd bring you something back, but that would be a lie."

"Levi, if you started buying me presents I'd worry. Have fun."

"Undoubtedly." 

They shared a few seconds of understanding, gazes locked and full of meaning - safe journeys, behave yourself, don't fuck up my mail. The stuffed suitcase was loaded into the belly of the vehicle, driver rushing out to unlock the swinging doors and once correctly stowed, the short man stepped aboard, turning briefly before embarking on phase one. 

"Be good and I'll get you a shitty postcard." 

Hydraulics signalled the exit closing and Levi strode to the back, taking up a position where he could see everything that was going on, no surprises. It may have been a throw back to earlier years, watching for anyone following and keeping a tab on movements, but was likely just habit and he pulled his phone out. 

Still deep in the tub, you surfaced to grab a towel, drying off just enough to read the message.

'Just left. Ten minutes late.'

Biting back the urge to start up a chat, you stuck to protocol and sent two kisses back, double x confirming you'd received and read his text. With a huff, you sank back down and tried to relax, willing the next six hours to go past in a flash. 

~~~~~~

Of course it hadn't flown by, the time literally dragging through your soul like a blunt knife attempting to slice bread - slow, painful and ragged. In the end, you hadn't been able to sit indoors anymore, nerves and adrenaline causing unrest so you'd gotten ready early, thick woollen dress over equally warming leggings and knee-high flat boots, all essential in this climate. One bonus was that the temperature gave your cheeks a pink glow, a hopefully attractive colour which now you chased away, sitting in the bus station with a hot tea. 

The building was vast, attached to the mainline rail terminus so you had a variety of humanity to watch, stories made up around each individual or group. Farewells. Greetings. Tearful reunions and equally moist goodbyes. That would be you soon. Checking the arrival's board, you saw yellow digits flick round to advise you of Levi's progress, expected delays making him around half an hour outside of schedule. He'd messaged you on leg two so you knew he caught the second bus with time to spare - now all you had to do was wait. 

Lights grew larger, city looming and the one nearing the end of the line became agitated, glaring at his fellow passengers with hatred. Every one of them had caused him anguish, selfishly stopping the coach to get on and adding minutes to his journey. Right on cue, the metal monster ground to a halt as yet another person wanted to board. 

"Could've fucking walked."

Knowing that was total bullshit made no difference, seething rage balling inside of him and he picked up a book, leafed through carelessly and threw it back down with a huff. 

Bright flicks of a digital panel changed, added letter making you bolt up from your seat and spill the remaining beverage on the floor unnoticed - the only thing you could see was the orange glow which let you know that Levi's bus would be arriving at stop D. A frantic search ensued, (e/c) eyes flicking all over until you saw excalibur, large sign pointing in the right direction. Wrapping a scarf around your neck, you ran outside to the terminal, joined by a few others who stood staring into the distance and willing their friends and family to get here. 

The driver had been bordering on illegal, speed limit not only kept to but horrifically stopping short of being reached - it was preferable to arrive in safety, admittedly, however the almost languid pace irked Levi no end. But now…now the announcement had come over the speakers, five minutes until the destination was reached and he grabbed his belongings, stashed the paraphernalia of a long trip in a small bag and secured his coat. Finally. 

You watched with excitement as the coach pulled in, door opening on the other side of a small road as the under hatch was released, luggage gathered and a trail of weary passengers began to cross over, meeting those waiting. Some were alone, wandering off to continue their journey or take a cab elsewhere, wheels of cases rolling through thick snow. But no Levi. About to dart for the vehicle, you stopped as one male appeared to one side, now visible at the front of his method of transportation and you grinned instantly. 

He stood with his dark case in hand, similarly black coat knee-length and a purple sweater poked out from above a loosely tied deep green scarf. If someone wanted a picture to put next to the word 'handsome', here it was, man's head tilted forwards and smirk in place with a look that said 'yup, it's actually me.' 

Levi stared, unable to fathom just yet that you were merely two metres away from him, your gorgeous face lit up with joy and winter chills, the epitome of beauty. In seconds, he would hold you close, kiss those lips he so loved to watch speaking and whisper all of the things he yearned to say. 

You began to laugh, hands itchy and craving touch and even the screeches to your left didn't register - you were enraptured. Loud calls and yells sounded like noises of unity to your clouded minds so no attention was paid in that direction as Levi stepped off the kerb, ready to close the final gap which had taken so long to reduce. A few more paces, that was all. Just a few more. Screams got louder and you saw the flicker of confusion on delicate features, glimpsed an arm reaching out towards you, fingers searching and begging. Glancing round, the last thing you were aware of was the colour red, a grinding sound and then nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know. I'm sorry. I just did that.


	13. Two Sides

Flying through the night's sky between brilliantly lit buildings, scraping the roofs with finger nails and laughing loudly, joy pouring out at the freedom of it all…you were coasting now, taking in sights and savouring the way a light wind whipped at your hair, voice close by to let you know Levi was right there too, soaring high by your side. You couldn't hear what he was saying, no words discernable but that low drawl was so near, almost tangible and you turned, taking your eyes off the route to catch a glimpse of his surely enraptured face. 

The man spoke softly, paper in his hands as he hunched over the pile of letters he'd brought with him, all of your correspondence since that first missive stacked up as for what felt like the hundredth time, he read out loud through the white offerings. Sitting on a chair that he'd pulled up to your bedside, Levi kept glancing over, praying for some kind of recognition at his familiar tone, your own thoughts, anything. Finishing off one particular note from more recently, he sighed and looked up, only to be met by your beautiful (e/c) eyes staring out from under barely open lids. 

You saw shapes, fuzzy and unformed - perhaps the speed with which you were gliding was too fast to pick up details such as expressions and anyway, the purring male narration had gone, alone again and you huffed with annoyance, pissed that he could leave in the middle of a flight. 

"Could've stayed until we landed, fuck sakes."

Unrecognizable speech came from barely moving lips and the dark haired man smiled gently, stroking your hair back and talking in soothing tones. 

"It's ok (F/N). I'm here waiting. Now kindly hurry the fuck up and come out of wherever you are. I miss you." 

The doctors had warned of this exact occurrence, one which he'd experienced so many times already, the non-lucid wakenings that to you would undoubtedly be spent on some other plain of existence, a dream land of fuck knows what. These instances were seen as a good thing though, the brain organising itself in preparation for full consciousness, your grey matter apparently not yet ready to experience real life just now. The first time it happened, Levi nearly fell out of his seat, convinced that you were coming round so soon and he'd run yelling down the corridors, calling for anyone to come quick - the actual truth hadn't been so clement however, hospital staff advising him that whilst encouraging, this could go on for ages. 

Your eyes were closed again, hands fisting at the covers and you twitched, a reaction which made sorrow shoot through his heart. Whatever you were seeing or doing seemed painful. 

Back on solid ground, you battled with demons that had no faces, clawed through hundreds of them in an attempt to get to the top, spurred on by the man next to you, his audible chat encouraging you to break out, reach the summit and succeed - succeed at what, you weren't sure but it had to be done, injuries ignored and mouth snarling. 

He'd resumed his vocal reading, having moved onto a novel and glasses were pushed up a delicate nose, legs crossed and one palm on you at all times, arm, thigh, stomach…anywhere, he didn't care as long as touch was involved. The door opened a crack, kindly nurse slipping in quietly and giving the speaker a warm smile. 

"That's it Levi, keep positive. You're doing the right thing."

"I know but I'm getting a fucking sore throat, Hange."

"And I brought you some juice for that very reason!" The woman in blue passed a carton over, ridiculously small straw looking laughable between tight lips. He muttered his thanks after a long sip and continued the discussion, hell bent on having his voice out there as much as possible. 

"She did it again."

"Mmm hmm, honey she's a fighter. Some people never move for weeks…or ever." She hated bringing that up, but the female was a medical professional through and through, sugar coating cracking away now and again. Also, Levi didn't strike her as one to believe in fairy tales, harsh truth preferable to having the proverbial wool pulled over anything. Checking stats, Hange adjusted the small oxygen tube in your nose and peeked under the bed, noting how full the bag was and measuring fluid intake versus output, most of your functions controlled and dealt with by modern machinery. "Needs more…"

"More what? Shall I get anything?" The man was on his feet, ready to run and fetch whatever was required to aid the prone individual before him. A friendly wave of hands answered, nurse grinning. 

"Unless you want to share your juice box, it's ok. Just have to adjust this and…there." One of the many hanging bags was tweaked, extra liquid dripping down to nourish your slightly dehydrated form. 

"Hey."

"Yes dear?" Levi had sat down again with a slump, spine curled as he hung his head, rubbing it harshly in something adjacent to grief or even anger. Silver shards appeared, flashing from beneath onyx strands and she knew what was on his mind. Hange had taken a shine to this male, impressed by his tenacity and drive; day one, he'd been ejected from your room once you'd been made comfortable so he took up residence in the hallway outside, sitting on the floor and leaning against his suitcase. Moved on from there too, he then gravitated towards the cafeteria and made a nuisance of himself, settling in for the long haul and becoming quite the well known face.

Eventually, the powers that be decided to take pity and allowed him to stay in your private quarters. They all knew the story of how the pair of you had come to know one another, and when coupled with the corroboration from your other two friends who visited regularly, it all added up to one thing - you'd have wanted him there. Levi used the room's bathroom to wash and bathe, seeing as you had no need for it and he slept upright in the tall backed chair, a hand on you always. His belongings were neatly packed away each day, as if confirming his belief that you would be out soon and generally he remained a polite if bitchy addition to the hospital. 

Pain was evident in the glare currently facing Hange and she nodded, knowing what must be going through his head and admiring the staying power of this person. 

"I understand Levi. It's hard. But you're doing a fantastic job. See…these waves are impressive, ok?" He looked up at the screen, white lines now becoming familiar and he shrugged, aware of the improvement but still sullen. "I'm not going to tell you it'll all be fine, I won't lie like that but please, don't give up."

"I'll never give up." Stare on your tense face, he gestured over. "She's scared or in pain. Whatever (F/N) is seeing, it's hurting her and I fucking hate that I can't stop it all." At least you'd calmed though, initial behaviour on arrival violent and worrying as you fought the staff, snarled random utterances and tried to rip the tubes from your arms - if that had continued, Levi wasn't sure how much he could've taken. 

"But she's safe. Ok? Understand? This tough cookie is as damn stubborn as you so just remember that. Alright?"

"Mmm."

"Alright?!"

"Yes Nurse fucking annoying, alright."

"Good. That's more like it. Now get some rest, you look like shit, Levi."

"I have an excuse. What's yours?" 

"Overworked and underpaid." She winked from behind thick glasses and went to leave, parting thoughts given whether the man wanted to hear it or not. "Don't lose yourself." As the door closed, he realised what had been meant but grumbled quietly nevertheless, book in hand and tale recommencing, steady drone hopefully reaching you somehow. 

~~~~~~

Nights were when his soul became as dark as the outside world, the bright snow fall not even breaking his mood and sleep was surely far off, dim lights illuminating his book as a steady pace of fiction was relayed, hope long gone. Levi wasn't even paying attention, just spoke automatically as you clutched his hand, spasms at first seeming intentional but now he knew it was just a reflex, taking no less solace in your grip though. To have you touch him in any way was most appreciated. 

Spirals of colour twisted around your current world, tornadoes vibrant and almost blinding as they merged into words, each one taking on a different hue and coming to life in front of you. Lying back, a field of neon grass tickled at your skin, vivid flowers swayed and distinct letters in a white sky started to set up a kind of order, all spelling something out that you couldn't grasp yet. Reaching up, you tried to hold those figures and make sense of it all, however coherence eluded you again, nonsense paragraphs no help at all. 

"Levi, I can't read it. What does it say?"

The man who had been addressed paused, not convinced you'd actually spoken in an understandable manner so he continued, putting it down to fatigue and stress. Rubbing at a freshly shaved cheek, Levi entered a new chapter, hours having passed since Hange had left but he didn't feel alone; you were with him. Mechanical lips formed the sentences and his psyche drifted, recalling every time you'd conversed, every text, every instance that he woke up to see your sleeping body virtually next to his, the first time he saw you in the flesh…that memory was marred, what happened next in the process of being erased yet it still caused him to wince noticeably, mouth now forming a wholly different and unwritten piece. 

"(F/N), you've gotten under my skin in the most fucking adorable way. I can't imagine being without you so I won't. You know I'm not easily swayed so don't even bother trying to tell me some shit about letting you go. We're going to cook together for real this time and I'll show you exactly how to do it, no piss poor attempts, ok?"

Spoons and forks came crashing through the rainbow alphabet, kitchen equipment dancing in circles like a meal on acid, a surreal and drug-like fantasy that wasn't threatening as Levi was there too, his shiny hair visible amongst cutlery. 

"Just so you know, you can't get rid of me now." Grey splashes gazed into barely revealed (e/c), the base reaction still providing him with a gorgeous view and he smiled, squeezing your hand and in danger of letting hidden tears fall. "What I wouldn't give to feel you squeeze back (F/N). On purpose." 

Warmth. Comfort. Safety. Flesh and bones. Blood that ran hot and with life. 

The image grew clearer, features made out and the addition of wetness in steely eyes concerned you - why was he crying? Weren't you supposed to be having fun, you'd only just met up? 

"Please…please just fucking…just fucking break my hand or something, let me know you're still in there…shit…" 

His sorrow was too much to bear, gut wrenching and distressing and you wondered why you could barely move, lids lifted further and dry lips parting to ask a million questions. 

"Levi?" It came out in a croak as if water hadn't been sampled in days and you curled your fingers, taking his hold weakly as energy seemed to have escaped you for now. "What's wrong?" The last thing you remembered was seeing him over the street, the cosy scarf and black coat, purple sweater…now he wore only a white shirt and you couldn't fathom the situation, completely confused and scared. 

"(F/N)? Did you say something?" Still sure he was going mad, Levi told himself that the ticklish sensation on his skin was just his own shiver, not your measured, loose grip and the man smiled with the beginnings of insanity. "No, of course you didn't…that would be crazy…"

Your heart dropped, now of the belief that you must be dead, why else would he utter such nonsense? Fearfully, you concentrated and used every ounce of strength left within, lifting your other arm to cup his face.

"No…no I did…am I…did I die? Can you hear me Levi? Levi?!" 

The last part came out in a terrified squeak, finally rousing the male from his trance and he gaped, noted the way your orbs darted around instead of staring plainly into nothingness and his hand enveloped yours, pressing your palm in so he could feel your touch after all this time.

"(F/N)? Oh fuck…(F/N)…" Stroking at your hair, he leant in with a disjointed delight, part of him refusing to accept this but the look of total bewilderment in your wide eyes was enough to snap him to full awareness. "Jesus (F/N), no you're not dead…you're in hospital, I'm here…I'll always be here…"

"H-hospital?" You whispered, tiny fragments trying to create a whole picture but it was a struggle, pieces of the jigsaw too mismatched and deformed to fit into place. "But…but I was just standing there…you were just standing there…we…"

"We never made it then. We have now."

"What? I don't understand…I can't…" Levi had been prepped for this too, an event which may never have happened and gentle patience invaded his core, aware of how fucking disoriented you'd be. 

"(F/N), listen…I'll explain. Just a minute though." He cupped your cheeks, thumbs rubbing and soothing. "Let me look at you." Somehow you managed to get your hands to the nape of his neck, biceps trembling but the softness of the undercut was worth it, fingers playing over the wonderful fuzz and you gave a sobbing laugh, all else forgotten for a few seconds. 

"I can't believe you're here. You're really here."

"I know (F/N), I am. I'm with you…" Lips pressed into yours like a feather, barely there and full of emotion as both of you succumbed, tears flowing and lives momentarily on hold. Flashes of delirious dreams ran across whilst your lids were closed, odd yet not dangerous and you banished them, concentrating on the dainty pecks you shared, letting them permeate your whole body and turn it to jelly. 

"Hey, you promised you'd come find me Levi!" 

Hange had burst in with a shriek, intending on doing some checks and surprised to see a pair of humans attached, expecting two slumbering forms instead. Levi broke away, smiling as he traced a finger over your pout and directing his next words to the new arrival. 

"I was going to. Give us a fucking minute at least."

"Who…what…" Limbs flopping down, you struggled with the line between reality and make-believe and the man you had been longing to touch disappeared, replaced by an unknown entity who grinned with almost violent glee. 

"I'm Hange, your specialist nurse. I know everything is a bit screwy right now, so I'll go get the doctor, ok? Short stuff here has been waiting for you!" Some screens were observed and she ran off, apparently to get someone higher up and Levi materialised again, ready to be honest. 

"Why am I here Levi?"

"What do you remember?"

"Seeing you across the street, some fucked up dreams and then you saying that I couldn't have said something…"

"You don't remember the bus?"

"Yea you got off it…" The expression above didn't fill you with assurance and you presumed that had been the wrong answer. 

"No, the one that hit you."

"A bus…hit me?"

"Yes." The screams crept in, the last thing you'd heard and you gasped. 

"People…people were shouting…"

"It slid on ice, went out of control." Levi gulped, revealing the worst thing he'd ever witnessed. "It clipped you in the head, sent you falling fucking sideways and I couldn't see you (F/N)…I thought…I thought…" Gritting his teeth, the pale man gathered himself, determined to remain strong for you. "I thought you'd gone under the wheels."

"Levi I…sorry…"

"No, don't." Serious now, he fixed you with a steady gaze. "It wasn't your fault. Freak accident because of shitty weather." You absorbed the information, the wintry conditions and cries of horror all making sense and you gave a throaty, rasping laugh. 

"Shit…one hell of a night, huh?" You saw his jaw flex, lips pressed together and Levi looked up to the ceiling, head shaking slowly as he summoned the ability to tell you the punch line. "What? What is it?"

"(F/N)…it didn't happen tonight…"

"How do you mean, of course it did…?" Even you didn't believe that now, his change of clothes one piece of evidence and you spoke darkly. "How long."

"Oh (F/N)…"

"How. Long?"

Stares connected again, sombre notes of steel flickered as he went for the abysmal conclusion. 

"Three weeks." 

Time stopped, ceased to exist and you felt like the stiff mattress was swallowing you up, dragging you down into a vaguely comfortable prison of shapes and sounds. The background became blurred, Levi still starkly clear but even he faded shortly after, darkness marching in as your breaths became rapid. 

"Hey, no…don't go…" He could sense your impending blackout and tapped at your face, keeping you in the here and now - he couldn't lose you again so soon. Lashes fluttered and (e/c) came and went, consciousness in fear of being abandoned so the man did the only thing he could think of. "(F/N), don't you fucking dare. You stay right here and tell me one thing, just one thing."

"Wha…I…"

"Why didn't you just throw my first letter away?"

"Huh?" It was working, unrelated topic making your clouded brain think about something else. "Because then you'd never have known that it went to the wrong address. That's what decent people do, return to sender."

"Thank you." 

Before any more could be said, Hange returned with the doctor, taking Levi's arm kindly. 

"We have to go."

"But…"

"I know you're strong willed, but we have to let him do his job. Ok?" Powerless to resist, the now fragile male let himself be dragged out, door closed and they stood in the hall. Your anguished sobs were loud and painful, missing days filled in and injury laid out bare no doubt and Levi spun, punching the wall with a growl. 

"Fuck!"

Minutes slid by like hours and the past weeks caught up on him, the anticipation and agonising wait crashing down - what would happen next? They hadn't fully described what kind of mental or physical state you'd be left with and he yelled internally for you, for your lost time, your potentially diminished abilities. Hange left the man alone, knowing when to step back and allow space; the expert would give more than enough information. 

Nearly half an hour later and the doctor emerged, beckoning to the fraught human as the nurse rushed in to tend to her patient. 

"Come. I'll buy you a tea." Levi hesitated, unwilling to be so far from your side, however he was aware that he needed to be educated, no matter how destructive the truth may be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I researched the crap out of this before I started writing, and whilst I try to keep things realistic, the honest truth about people waking up from comas is just too bleak so I've used some artistic license here, it is fiction after all :)


	14. Baby Steps

Sitting in the soulless canteen in the middle of a snowy night, two men shared a tea and discussed the harsh reality of your condition, what to expect and certain important pieces of information. Given the length of time you'd been laid down, despite the regular flexing exercises Levi had administered, your physical strength would be weakened, a small percentage of your muscle mass having been diminished and it would take time and energy to build that up once more. The mental side was less predictable, bouts of confusion and anger likely along with flashbacks and perhaps depression over your altered state, uphill struggle on the horizon to return you to normal and even 'normal' may not ever be attained in the end. 

"So what next?"

"Well Levi, she's being taken for a scan as we speak so I need to assess any damage from the accident. Once I know that, we can move on."

"I see." Sipping his drink as if just chatting about the weather, the pale man used his coping method of affected lethargy to get through this, distancing himself with a look of pure disinterest in the hope it may calm his racing heart and soothe his troubled mind. "And when will that be?"

"I think…" The doctor checked his watch, frowning down. "...she'll be out now so I should get the results in less than half an hour."

"How long to make a prognosis?"

"Same time again, give or take. I'm good but not that good." Trying to lighten the atmosphere, the medic sighed. "Put it this way, (F/N)'s coherent enough to hold a conversation so at least you won't have to sit there alone and talk to yourself anymore." Silver laced with white glared over, joke considered and digested before responding in a deeper way than he'd imagined possible.

"I've been talking to (F/N) for three weeks. I wasn't alone." 

Silence descended and the two males absorbed that last declaration, quiet and respectful moment shared before more knowledge was imparted. 

"She might not be the same, Levi."

"I realise that." Enough of his own research had been carried out and in the end he'd stopped reading it all, dire tales of failed recovery weighing heavy on his mind. Of course the internet was a great place to find the worst possible scenarios - no one bothered posting a tale that was pretty much vanilla, it was always one extreme or the other and he tried to keep that in the fore. Sensing unrest, the doctor spoke softly. 

"Want to go back?"

"Please." 

On returning to what had been both of your homes recently, Levi was pleasantly surprised to see you upright, padded pillows propped behind your head to angle you like a conscious person should be. Smiling gently, he watched you sleeping and gave a small huff - napping already after such a long slumber. This was to be expected too, frequent energy saving instances as your body regained strength, filed and categorised what had gone on and set you on the road to making sense of it all. The read-outs on the machine were steady and full of activity, your flickering lids telling of a deep dream and he frowned, speaking to Hange who had been finishing off perfunctory duties. 

"How do we know she's just asleep? Not slipped back again?"

"Good question! Here." White lines that peaked and troughed were tapped. "Remember before, these were less spiky?"

"Mmm hmm?"

"This shows increased brain functions that we see in REM sleep so it's just a light one, she'll be awake soon."

Trusting the professional, he nodded and stroked errant hair away, slight twitch from you in response to the gentle action. 

"When can I take her home?"

"Well, it depends on a lot of things Levi." Hange finished up and sat on your bed, staring down as you slept off the world's worst hangover. "The scan. What (F/N) thinks. Her behaviour." Fiddling with your blue hospital robe, she sighed. "Does she live alone? There's going to be a long road ahead in terms of physical recovery."

"Not any more." 

Levi gripped your hand tightly, intent on being the care-giver should you so wish and the nurse looked on with soft eyes.

"Why aren't there more guys like you out there?"

"Because I'm unique. A fucking catch." Speaking with monotone words, he internally willed your results to be expedited, hurried through the system so plans could be laid, the unknown damage inside of you putting a halt on anything concrete. Hange squeezed the man's shoulder and left quietly, giving some time to the newly reunited couple. The door clicked shut and you jumped, lids open and fearful stare searching for answers. "(F/N), it's ok. I'm still here."

"Levi…oh fuck, it's still true, isn't it?"

"I'm afraid so." He linked his fingers with yours, weak attempt at reciprocating the grasp being all that you could manage and you smiled with a dark humour. 

"Doctor says I'll need weeks of physiotherapy. Maybe months."

"Mmm hmm. And I'll be here to help the whole time."

"But…what about your job? Your home?" 

A pale hand waved away the thought, standard gesture which you'd seen on screen so many times and you could now view it in reality, albeit a tainted one. 

"I've spoken to Mike. Extended leave. Sure, they won't pay me much but I have enough put aside to cover the bills for quite some time." Levi leant down, palms on your cheeks as his hair tickled across your skin. "That is if you'll have me?"

"I…of course I will but…you don't have to...look at this mess I've gotten myself into, you shouldn't have to…"   
A finger halted your ramble before tears could spill, soft pressure on your lips that was replaced by a warm mouth. Pulling back slowly, your visitor smiled and shook his head. 

"I know I don't have to. I want to. Let me fix you, (F/N)." That set you off, sobs unable to be held at bay any longer and your croaked voice gave a pained wail, mind still reeling and coming to terms with everything that had gone on over the past three weeks.

"Th-thank you Levi, I don't know what to do, I don't know where to start, I want to go home and I want to hug you and cook with you and…and…I fucking can't!"

The outburst was born from confusion and despair more than any side effects from your injuries and once again, the one close by gave another of his amazingly heart felt yet grumpy declarations. 

"Baby steps, (F/N). That's how we start. Work our way up. And then, when I'm satisfied you won't drop a fucking carving knife in my foot, then we can get onto the good stuff." He tapped the tip of your nose playfully, eliciting a small laugh and he turned serious. "I mean it though. I'll work you to the bone to make you better (F/N), get you back to normal. It's not gonna be easy, you'll probably want to kill me in the end but we have to do this. Together. Ok?" 

"Ok." There was an air of acceptance and understanding surrounding the man who had spoken, a vehement promise that seemed deeper. "Levi?"

"Yes?"

"Have you taken care of someone before?" He nodded, silver eyes sombre yet determined. 

"My mother. Her eventual passing was peaceful but she also had muscular dystrophy. It wasn't life threatening but it did limit her movements. And trust me, I'm sure I saw her reaching for a hammer to bludgeon me with after one of my physio sessions." 

"Are you sure you want to get stuck doing that again?"

"(F/N), I can't think of anywhere else I'd rather be than stuck with you." He meant it whole heartedly, everything - someone once said that when you found the one, you knew. And he knew. "Now, we need to find that doctor with your fucking results." 

"Levi?" He glanced down, soft grey meeting watery (e/c). "I don't know what to say."

"Say nothing then. Just let me look at you." A silent moment was shared, just like on Skype and you managed a wan smile, his hand gripping yours. "Do you need anything?"

"I'm kind of thirsty, actually." You reached out, shaking arm screaming at you to stop as a simple action was denied, cup fumbled and you unintentionally sent it spilling to the floor, plastic mug bouncing off clean tiles. "Fuck." 

"Like I said, baby steps." Levi sighed, aware of your utter frustration and nodded. "I know it's tough. I've had three weeks to come to terms with this and you've barely had three fucking hours, but trust me. Muscles can be regained. We'll get there."

You gaped, unsure what to do or how to act, brain firing off nonsense whilst trying to assimilate the whole situation, pissed at your inabilities which to you were perfectly serviceable earlier on today. But no, not today. Ages ago. Saved from another teary outburst, you looked up as the doctor entered, Hange close behind and they seemed…hopeful. That was the right word. Or was it? Did you just make that up? Doubting even your basic language skills for no real reason, you spoke quietly, praying only Levi would hear. 

"Is 'hopeful' a word? It sounds stupid."

"Yes." A tender hand caressed your cheek, warm but tiny smile given as he comforted your stressed mind. Physically, he knew what to do, years of experience behind him and he regretted never telling you of his mother's illness, more so because he'd actually forgotten all about it, daily motions habitual and nothing out of the ordinary. But mentally. That was the hurdle which could take some getting used to. So far though, apart from your crazed behaviour immediately after the accident, you appeared to be yourself, albeit short conversations held with lucidity and you remembered who he was at least, however there could be many gaps which needed filling in. If the others had picked up on your query, they made no motion to acknowledge as such and the man began to relay information. 

"We have your scans back and it's good news." You flinched, body trying to sit up with anticipation but managing only a twitch. "There's no lasting damage, the swelling has remained down and any bruising is gone. All we seem to have left is the obvious recovery of your strength and perhaps the occasional bout of confusion over the small things." He didn't mention your question but looked at you with open and honest eyes. "You may have nightmares. Recollections of things that didn't happen. Trouble recalling normal day to day instances but that should pass too. It's all part of readjusting, (F/N). After a blow to the head like that, it's reasonable to expect that things are a little jumbled up top." He paused, aware this was a bit much and the man smiled. "Basically, as long as you have help at home and come back for regular check ups, we should be able to discharge you tomorrow."

"Really?"

"Yes (F/N). I'm a firm believer in getting into normality. Learn to use your body like before, be in a familiar setting. Now, I can arrange a district nurse for…"

"Not necessary."

"Levi? Do you understand…"

"Fully." He did, knew that this would also include coaxing you back to life and comforting you when things got bad but that was fine. He could be incredibly good at sympathising over shitty situations. 

"Ok. You know where we are though, don't struggle through." The medic nodded, satisfied with his patient and her carer. "I'll leave you in peace, but both of you need to promise me one thing. Sleep. Now."

"I've been asleep for three weeks!"

"That wasn't sleep, (F/N). You need an honest rest. This has been a lot to take in, your brain has to deal with that, file information away. So yes, sleep. And Levi? No arguments."

"Yea, your eye bags have eye bags."

"Thanks, Hange."

"Any time!" 

The friendly nurse and smiling doctor left, finger waved in warning to solidify the order and Levi sighed, sorting out your blankets and dimming the lights. 

"Come in with me."

"Hmm?"

"I presume you've been crashing on that stiff looking chair. I'll move over Levi." You tried, body managing a few centimetres and pained (e/c) looked up. This would be normality for a while and you hated being so useless, however if this was to work, you needed to know when to ask for help. "Can you?"

"Sure." Strong arms assisted, your own pushes given for show and the man made sure the many tubes and attachments weren't caught up, kicking off his shoes and removing the crisp white shirt, revealing a black tee which would be much more comfortable to rest in. Levi climbed up, heart racing as the thankfully large bed was filled by two now, an upper limb slid under to turn you on one side and bring you closer. Linking fingers with yours, the male smiled as he looked upon you lying next to him, for real this time. "This is better." 

"A hundred times better." Gentle lips pressed into yours, emotional and true and he drew back, that genuine expression so near and so warm but something had popped to the fore, a difficult ask which had to come out. "What about, you know…toilets?"

"Don't think about that yet (F/N). Just close your eyes. Forget it all."

"Ok." 

Giving in to strange fatigue, you stole one last gaze at incredible silver and felt yourself being moved again, head on a muscular and manly smelling chest, arm draped across an equally powerful abdomen and Levi hugged you into him, hand pressed against your back. 

"I've got you."

~~~~~~

Bright sun and an even brighter announcement woke you both in the late morning, Hange coming in with trays and a smile. 

"Wakey wakey sleepy heads!" 

You stirred, a little foggy about where you were and what was going on, shifting body under yours stretching out. 

"Fuck."

"Morning to you too, Levi. I've brought you breakfast! (F/N), you hungry?"

"Umm…I think so." Was this a hotel? A rather intrusive one? Did they always barge in? Trying to sit, you placed a hand on what was hopefully Levi's gut and pushed, arm creating little in the way of effect and you gave a grunt, matching one from the man you lay pressed against. 

"Easy on the stomach (F/N)."

"I can't…I can't get up." 

"Here." A hand was offered and you took it, applying your own force as you were pulled up slowly. Wriggling, you vaguely managed to get into a more vertical position and looked around, machines and read-outs puzzling.

"What…I mean where…" You took a minute, adjusted to your surroundings and let reality come back in segments, truth eventually bursting through - Levi didn't push you or give hints, wanted you to figure it out alone and he stood, arms above his head in a pose of awakening. "Ah. Now I remember." Looking up, you saw a flicker of pride on pale features and smiled. "Didn't take too long, huh?"

"No, you did well (F/N)." He leant down, kiss given to your waiting lips and the man swept to the adjoining bathroom, morning routine underway. You turned to Hange, prone and helpless yet feeling strangely well rested. 

"Is he going to have to take me when I need a piss, Hange?"

"At first, dear. You should be able to take care of most of it, but getting there will need help."

"How fucking embarrassing."

"It happens all the time." She fluffed at your pillows, hands under your arms and a nod was given, slight lift provided but you did the majority of the work, putting your limbs to good use and embarking on the hard trials ahead. "There, see? On your way already." 

Levi returned, looking like his slumber did the world of good too and he sat on the bed, table swung round so food could be placed before you. 

"I'll be back soon, you eat up!" Hange swept off, eternally joyful apparently and a knife and fork were presented, serious stare from flashing orbs. 

"You try."

He picked at his own meal, close eye on you as weary hands were moved, metal cutlery clunking down and you leant on the surface edge, concentrating and willing yourself to succeed. Stabbing at some egg, you scooped haphazardly and triumphed, yellowy substance snared and you brought it near, shakes making it fall onto your sheets. 

"Jesus." Pinching it up, you used fingers instead and tasted your first solids in weeks, stomach excited and tense at the same time. 

"Take your time (F/N). Don't want you throwing up."

"I honestly don't think I could. Would probably get to my throat and then get lazy and go back down."

"Disgusting." 

Laughing at your own crude joke, you kept going, motor skills lacking but you made up for it with enthusiasm, determined to do this yourself. Levi nodded - he could have fed you, but what would that achieve? Wrapping you in cotton wool was desirable, treating you like a precious gem all he really wanted to do, however your health came before his need to protect and if he had to be a strict bastard, he would be. A few more morsels were managed, small snack enough to satiate your belly and besides, you were shattered, simple actions causing extreme fatigue. How the fuck were you going to be able to walk? The prospect of stairs frightened you, dressing, bathing…

"Levi? Have I had a wash at all?"

"Hange does that."

"Oh." Sighing, you realised how much your privacy had been invaded already, caring a little less about what was to come. "And you're ok with all of this? What you're going to have to do?" Levi placed his fork down, napkin dabbing at his lips and he glared over, ready to deliver honesty in a slightly harsh fashion. 

"Don't ask me that again. I know what's coming. I know how to help. So if you don't trust me, say so now because I don't want to be wasting your time."

"I…"

"I'm not being horrible for the fucking sake of it (F/N), but I can't have you second guessing yourself every day. I want to be here for you. Let me be here for you."

He was right, saying what most people would refuse to utter but they'd all be thinking it - 'shut the hell up, I already said it was alright.'

"Deal. I will never ask you again."

"Good." Sniffing, he glanced to the side to hide his smirk, seeing your own twitching lips and he changed the subject. "I'll contact Mike. He's been worried about you. Actually, the whole damn town has been apparently. You're something of a celebrity."

"Wow. Who knew getting hit by a bus would earn me a following?"

"Trust me, this is the biggest thing to happen in their tiny little lives." Much worse occurred in this city and again you had that longing to live a life less busy, move to a quiet sleepy village and bask in an uneventful existence. "Eren and Jean will be by soon, might want to get the crumbs off your face." A tissue was passed over and you complied, setting muscles to work again and stepping towards independence, grateful that Levi was allowing, or forcing, you to act alone. 

He had stepped outside to make his call, giving you a couple of minutes alone for introspection - this was not how it had been planned, accident putting a hold on frivolous and passionate time together, but now you had a person so dead set on aiding you, no hesitation in his offer and that was perhaps the most amazing thing you'd ever experienced. You just wanted to get home now, start recovering and adjusting, using that as your beacon; it was good to have simple goals, take one at a time. 

The door opened and familiar voices came through, hushed and respectful. That all changed as your friends saw you sitting up, half eaten plateful on the table and your eyes open and alert. 

"(F/N)? When…how…oh my god!" 

Eren raced in, arms around you tightly and you were able to pat his back for a few seconds, grin wide to match the two worn by the men. 

"Welcome back! I knew you'd be ok."

"How did you know, Jean? Are you psychic?"

"No Eren, just optimistic. Jeez…"

"Hey, don't get all…"

"Guys?" They flushed, standing to one side together now and looking down at your chiding tone. "Please don't fight?"

"Sorry (F/N). I guess we're just so...shocked? We saw Levi downstairs on the phone and he just did the usual, nodded once! He could have told us!"

"And spoiled the surprise, Jean? Too easy." 

They smiled and pulled chairs up, ready to hear all about it and you held nothing back, explained everything start to finish since you'd woken up last night. They were sombre, glad you had come round but pained by the uphill struggle now before you, promising to help in any way they could. You paused, lump in your throat as gravity weighed you down. 

"Actually, there is one thing. Could you…could you go to my place? Throw out all the food? It's probably...probably all spoiled now…" The simple aging process of consumables caused deep sorrow, proved how long you'd been lying here and just reminded you of the lost opportunities with Levi. Eren took your hand, calm voice soothing. 

"We already did. Used the spare key, put your mail on the table. I hope you don't mind, but we thought it would be a good idea. You didn't want to walk into an apartment stinking of old cheese, right?"

Grinning, you shook your head lightly, heart bursting with love at their kind gesture. 

"Thanks guys. For everything. You're amazing."

"Well, duh!" Jean was given a small slap to the arm by his boyfriend for that proclamation and you laughed quietly, already feeling more lifted about everything and you held a strong resolve to get fucking better, no matter what.


	15. First Date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Got some silly moments coming up, bit of light relief from everything :)

Papers were signed, belongings gathered and tubes removed, meaning you were now responsible for your own bodily functions. Levi had helped you finish dressing, picking up where a nurse left off and aiding with the more fiddly things like zips, delivering you back into the outfit you wore when standing at the bus station, finally letting him see you as intended. Grey eyes swept over your form as you sat in the chair, final boot secured and he smiled. 

"Sorry (F/N) but I didn't think any of my clothes would have fit you."

"That's ok, I don't think they would have suited me either. Much better on you."

"Of course." He rose, bent over to kiss your lips, a habit he'd gotten used to over the past twelve hours as he couldn't quite believe he was able to do so, finally. You pressed back, conveying your own hunger and sighs were shared, incredible glee at being allowed to enjoy physical contact. Levi pulled away slightly, mouths still close and forehead on yours. "I know this isn't what we expected, but at least we're together."

"We can still have fun, right?"

"Definitely. I'll find a way to make physio seem like a nice fucking activity." 

"If anyone can, it's you Levi."

"Seriously? I make getting up in the morning sound like a ten year stretch inside."

"But that's what I like about you." You smirked, tentatively attempting to lift your hand to his cheek, getting a few seconds of touch in before having to give up. "You amuse me."

"I amuse you? Well then, I guess I know what my purpose in life is then. Entertaining (F/N)." Returning the sly expression, he straightened and cast his eye around, looking for any errant items as Hange entered, cheerful and wearing a huge smile as usual.

"So, you're actually leaving us?"

"As much as I'm grateful for the hospitality, I think I would like to go home now."

"Well don't be a stranger. I'll see you for check ups, right?"

"Wouldn't miss it." You grinned back, making light of what could've been a very bleak outlook, lucky to be in this position of almost full clarity - the odd word eluded you or made no sense and you fully expected to wake up tomorrow with confusion again. But you were alive, mentally unscathed for the most part and about to walk out with the man you'd been desperate to be beside for ages. Your nurse approached, arms full of tablets that had to be taken, things which would help your recovery and keep the blood thin, preventing the occurrence of another swelling on the brain. It was unlikely, however they took no chances.

"We never did get to ask you (F/N), are you on any medications?"

"None."

"Oral contraceptive?"

"No, I had the coil fitted two years ago."

"Ah, fine then. Won't interfere with that. Although I'd suggest strengthening up a bit before you kids get frisky. Unless that's the kind of thing you're into…"

"We're leaving. Now." Levi held his suitcase handle, coat buttoned and scarf in place as the wind outside still came with a biting chill, snow currently ceased but climate promising more. He scowled at the woman, ready to add to his retort but she laughed, handing you the bag full of pills and potions. 

"Have fun with this one, (F/N)."

"Oh I will." 

A wheelchair was presented, your carriage for the journey and instructions were given - a transport vehicle would take you home, avoid any icy mishaps and you sized up the gap between you and the new toy, wondering if you could get yourself into it safely. Making a few attempts, you pushed on the arms of your seat, upper body seemingly holding more power than lower and you carefully stuck a foot out, load-bearing limb shaking as a failed switch ended in you flopping back down. 

"Here, I'll move it." Levi shifted the item and pointed. "There. Try that." 

Grunts of effort accompanied your strained muscles working overtime and with a triumphant yell, you plonked into the leather chair. 

"Well I can see you definitely won't be getting carried around like a princess, (F/N)."

"Tch. What's the use in doing everything for her, Hange?"

"Right ball buster, aren't you?" 

"I do what's necessary. Now can we fucking go or what?" A hand gestured to the door and a snort of relief came from above, your moveable seat being rolled out of the room which had been home for three weeks, time which you didn't remember, couldn't fathom correctly but all you knew was that this signalled a happy goodbye. Levi pushed you a little too fast, desperate to liberate you from these sterile halls and deliver you to more private quarters - he'd been waiting to meet you for so long and to share your company all this while had been excruciating. 

Upon reaching the main exit, a kind of mini crowd seemed to be gathered and you heard a low grumble. 

"What now…for fuck sakes."

Hange leapt ahead to join the small group, one which included your doctor and a couple of unfamiliar faces. 

"Good luck (F/N), you've been one of our success stories, keep it up." Smiling at the medic who had been your carer all this time, you nodded in response before he turned to your chauffeur with a smirk. "And Levi? Don't come back."

"To this shit hole? Not if you paid me a year's salary."

"Oh come on, you loved staying with us. I'll miss you in the canteen." 

That was an unknown speaker, but judging by their attire, the man worked as a kind of chef. 

"Your piss poor attempts at tea need to improve." Laughter rang out in the foyer and you glanced up, wondering just how many people Levi had endeared himself to unintentionally. A few more words were shared, commiserations to you for having to deal with the moody individual, all spoken in good nature and he tutted, itching to get out. "Right, you're boring me now. Bye." Striding through the sliding doors, he didn't look back and pushed forwards, leaving this place behind, hopefully forever. 

Cold wind hit your cheeks, invigorating and pure, skin awakened by natural air instead of the regurgitated climate they provided inside. It felt like a rebirth, emerging from a cloud which would admittedly take some time to clear, but you'd made the first step, surfaced from the fog just a little, enough to see your destination and have a beacon to cling onto. Ice and snow lay around, wheels sliding to one side and you yelped, a sound half way between glee and fear, a noise mostly heard on rollercoasters. 

"Fuck…" Levi's boots skidded as he held tightly to the handles, body pressing into your transportation as he tried to regain control, chicane of tyre marks left in his wake. You heard scuffles and squeaks, unsure exactly what was happening to the male in charge of your safety and you called out over the noise of ambulances and traffic. 

"You ok?"

"Yea…just…shit…" A flurry of activity commenced as the man lost footing, falling to the ground with a huff, hand still latched onto your vehicle. "Oh fucking marvellous."

"Levi?" Mustering strength, you craned your neck round to see limbs sticking out, a figure prone on the floor that struggled to regain an upright position and you held in a laugh, sure that finding hilarity in his tumble would not be met with kindness. 

"I'm ok…it's alright…damn." Back on his feet, the pale individual griped loudly. "Fucking weather. Shouldn't they grit the paths around here? At least give us a chance of survival?"

"Are you hurt?"

"Only my pride. I'm sure those pricks are watching from inside and having a good old chuckle." Indeed they were, Hange's face creasing up with giggles but he didn't chance a stare, simply carried on towards the waiting van. It was specially constructed, ramp and anchors made for wheelchairs and you were delivered safely, locked in and ready to go. The driver made sure everyone was settled before starting a slow drive, care taken on such treacherous roads.

"Quite the weather we're having, huh?" The guy started a cheery conversation up, obliviously rambling to create a narration for the trip. "Could spell a nasty accident if people aren't being vigilant."

"How do you think I ended up in this?" You didn't say it unkindly, delivering your comment with a smile and the man checked his mirror, gauging your expression and snorting a laugh. 

"Good to see a sense of humour, Miss. It's a rarity these days." 

Your building was soon in view, dark early evening making it seem much more splendid than reality as external lights added a certain ambience, first small flakes of another dusting ghosting downwards to pepper your outerwear, a decidedly nervous exodus from the van underway. Levi made sure to keep his wits about him this time, take smaller steps and remain unscathed and you were lowered onto the pavement, driver thanked gratefully. He drove away, two of you now alone on the side of the road and you sighed. 

"Well, it took three weeks but here we are."

"Better late than never, (F/N). In this way?"

"Yup, straight through there." Using one hand to push and another to pull his luggage, your visitor and now physiotherapist made a sideways lunge through the empty main reception area, tiled floors traversed and button pressed, waiting elevator opening on demand. You gave directions, correct number selected and the twang of excitement in your stomach surfaced - different circumstances granted, however the promise of unconditional assistance was incredible, one man prepared to do all of this with you…many would have turned around and left, you presumed. 

Apartment reached, you watched as Levi used your keys, unlocking swiftly and he spoke quietly. 

"You'd better be ready for an evening of doing fuck all."

"Sounds fantastic." Your weary body needed rest, his too, and sitting back relaxing was a heavenly prospect. Tyres moved, metal carriage pushed forwards in a momentous flourish, only to be stopped by the chair becoming wedged in the frame, too large to fit through your door. 

"Typical. All I want to do is get you home and the world can't be kind enough to just fucking give me that." He made a few more experimental shoves, followed by a violent attempt which resulted in the sound of protesting wood. "That's it." He dragged you back, dislodged with a screech and you giggled, luggage shoved in first in a show of annoyance. "Ok, here we go." Arms scooped you up bridal style, your untrained limbs clutching faintly at his coat and you squealed, carried gracefully inside like a newly wed and before he placed you on the couch, sparkling silver eyes gazed into wide (e/c). "Always better to rely on traditional methods, (F/N)." One of your frequent and soft kisses ensued, a move which could have become more heated if you were capable. 

"Thank you, Levi."

"For getting you stuck in the door?"

"For everything."

"Don't be getting all mushy." He smiled, another peck administered and the man sat you down slowly, figure sweeping out to fold the wheelchair and bring it inside. You stared at it, an item which spoke of your temporary disability and you scowled. 

"I'm never using that again. I want to do it myself."

Levi took his coat and boots off, hanging the long jacket across his suitcase and he appeared by your side, fingers aiding with your own outerwear. 

"I know (F/N). We'll get there." Pale hands dealt with your attire, hooks utilised by the exit and he joined you swiftly again. "So, I know the layout, no need for another tour. It looks bigger in person." He scanned your home, nodding at nothing in particular and you gave a small admittance. 

"I pretty much have no food at all. Sorry."

"That's ok. Take out tonight, I can go pick stuff up tomorrow, yea?" 

"Thanks, if that's ok?" Levi knew you'd be in two minds, partly happy to enjoy his company but also feeling like a burden and he placed an arm around your shoulders, wriggling in and pulling you close until your head rested against his, simple hug meaning so much. 

"I'll go over this once (F/N). No, you're not imposing upon me. No, I don't regret appointing myself as main carer. No, I don't want to leave and go home. Listen. I'm here for as long as you need me, ok? I'll help in my own special way, which of course means being an ass and generally pissing you off, but I will help, that is a promise. And (F/N)?" He tilted your head up with a hand to your chin, eyes locked and humorously serious. "I meant what I said in my note. You make me a better person and I'm not about to throw that away just because you're a massive weakling right now." 

"Massive weakling?!"

"Yes. But we'll change that. Soon you'll be kicking the shit out of me."

"Damn straight I will, Levi. And I'll say this once, too. Thank you."

"Don't let me hear you utter those words again. It's my pleasure." He brought you in, mouths pecking with hunger and Levi felt a hand on his thigh, light squeeze applied that lifted his soul - there would be tears and trials ahead, but that one grip told him all he needed to know. You were most certainly a fighter. 

~~~~~~

After nibbling on some pizza, you called defeat, stomach still only wanting small portions and the man you lay against made a suggestion. 

"Shall I run you a bath?"

"That would be great actually. I smell of hospitals."

"Well, I didn't want to say…" He smirked, loving the playful stare you gave, no life lost in those orbs. "I'm getting the jibes out the way while I still can (F/N). While you're defenceless."

"Won't be forever, then you'd better watch out." 

He flicked your nose, retaliation non-existent and the man stood, idea in mind. 

"Ok, we're going to walk to the bathroom." Holding your hands out, you stretched as far as possible and took hold of his warm grasp, uncertainty on your features. 

"I don't know…"

"No quitting (F/N). Now pull." Giving it all your strength, you did as commanded and shook, effort physically displayed in tremors and you managed to lift up slightly, helped minimally by Levi. "Come on, keep going." Growling, you tried to ignore the screams in your limbs and soldiered on, legs reaching breaking point. The man noted your wobble and made a switch, easily supporting you under your arms and you were face to face, palms on his waist and voice quivering.

"Now what?"

"Lift your feet. Put them on mine."

"Really?"

"Really." Tentatively, you raised one with difficulty, lack of offensive force allowing an easier movement than you'd actually thought and a heavy sole thudded onto his foot, then the other, bodies pressed together and heat shared. Levi still had you in his protective grasp and you felt like a rag doll, kept upright by another. "There. Now, move with me." He took a step backwards, muscles following suit instinctively as you made your first stride in three weeks. The slow trip continued, each pace taking it out of you but there was no giving in, face determined and set in a stern expression and the man burst with pride, such progress already and he could see how hard you were battling against your own body. 

"I'm doing it…Levi, I'm doing it!"

"Yes, yes you are. But we're not there yet. More." Snarling, you grit your teeth and continued the strange dance, two people touching the whole way from chest to feet, noses bumping and breaths strained. You had this. Needed this. Would conquer no matter what. Entering the bathroom with your croaks and squeaks as a soundtrack, Levi frowned. "Do you have a chair in here?"

"N-no." Trembling lips delivered the truth and a huff came from your helper. 

"Shit. I'll have to set you on the floor, sorry."

"G-go ffffor it…ahh fuck!"

The pain was becoming too much, too extreme and you felt yourself caving, knees ready to dissolve and send you to the tiles but something spurred you on, that same drive which brought you out of the spiral of mourning for your parents and pointed in the direction of a more worthwhile life. Yelling now, you squeezed your eyes shut and gave a final step, fragile form caught carefully and lowered against the wall, your whole being hating you with insane fervour. You didn't care though, had made it here and the sense of victory on day one allowed you to keep from demanding sleep, adrenaline pumping. 

Levi knelt before you, hands on your pink cheeks and smile wide, the biggest you'd ever seen on him.

"Well done (F/N). I honestly thought you'd go down way earlier."

"Ha!" Panting, you leant your head back and grinned. "How about a little faith, Levi?"

"Now I know what I'm working with, this is going to be some intense training." He'd used the difficult challenge as a base line, witnessed your potential and he nodded, impressed by your tenacity even at this early stage. And now came the difficult and obvious next part of the process, man turning to let warm water flow into the tub, bubbles added. "We umm, we have to get you undressed." 

"Yea…" The time in hospital also meant something else slightly embarrassing - no hair removal had taken place. "I'm kind of…well…" Luckily, Levi understood and came up with a plan, shielding you from unnecessary pain, not caring but he knew you would.

"I won't look."

Grabbing a towel, he laid it over you like a snug blanket, hands sliding up your legs to find clothing. Attempting to ignore how the sensation of his touch sent you into a mild frenzy, you concentrated on the sound of liquid, soothing soak almost upon you. Naked from waist to toes, your figure was adjusted as Levi lifted you up in one arm, zipper dragged down your back and dress slipped from aching shoulders. He was so near, so deliciously close that you could smell his cologne, transported to forests that housed therapeutic trees and masculine warmth, all of the memories from your missives marching through your mind and calling at you to grab him, take your man tightly and never let go. 

Levi closed his eyes, working on feel alone and resisting the urge to explore further - today was not the right time for this kind of liaison. Once he'd removed everything, he glanced round, gauging the distance and height, silver pools hidden once more as he peeled away the towel. It wasn't that he didn't want to look, but respected this as intended, a bath for healing purposes only. Lifted carefully, you were again elevated and gave directions, explaining when to descend. 

"That's it…hang on, let me hold here…" Hands on the edge, you braced with difficulty and slid into thick soapy froth, safe and secure. "Done." The sight which met Levi's gaze caused his heart to ache, an adorable scene and he wondered how he'd been so stupidly lucky to have written the wrong damn address on an envelope. Actually, how did he manage that? Waving the thought away, instead he looked upon the head which barely surfaced from bubbles, innocent face peeking out behind a kingdom of suds and he smirked. You shrugged lightly, staring up. "What?"

"You."

"What about me?"

"Cute."

"Lay off." Easing your aches and pains, you allowed the water to envelop you, lift your body into a suspended position and kiss away hurt. "This is good. Thanks."

"No 'thank you's.' My pleasure. Getting you out is going to be fun when you're all fucking slippery."

"I'm sure we'll manage Levi." 

In the end, it had been a little troublesome, wet flesh not easy to cling to and with the addition of self imposed blindness, Levi had to admit that he'd struggled. Dried and in pyjamas, you were carried to bed, enough work-outs for the day and as fluffy sheets were pulled up, you sighed. 

"This has been perfect."

The man climbed in, snuggling up close like you'd been a couple for years, comfortable in each other's presence and able to share proximity without shame. His head lay on the pillow watching you, fingers ghosting over exposed skin under the covers.   
"It has, despite the circumstances (F/N)."

"You have to admit, I leave a lasting impression with my first dates."

"That you do. Now, sleep. You must be fucked."

"I really am." 

It didn't take long to drift off, body satisfied and sporting the pull of exercise and soon you were in dreamland, images of colourful words and jolting bright neon grass spilling through as a recollection, pictures most recently seen as you tried to wrench yourself from unconsciousness. 

Levi stayed awake a while, enjoying the deep breaths of well earned rest that came from you, noting the tiny twitches which he'd become accustomed to but this time they held no malice, only honest slumber.


	16. Domestic Reality

Movement. Bangs and muffled thumps. Someone was in your house and they shouldn't be. Lifting a weary lid, you tried to sit up, arms useless so all that you managed was to roll slightly to one side, sheets next to you obviously slept in and pillow dented. What the fuck? You couldn't understand - had you been tied down? Is that why you were unable to move? And who the hell had been in your bed? Fear crept in as movement evaded you, limbs heavy and good for nothing, dangerous memories freezing your brain. Darkness, a struggle, pain. All these things made you convinced that you'd had some kind of drug injected inside, one which incapacitated you and turned your bones to a pile of jelly. Scared and anxious, you reached out, stretching into space and unsure why, only convinced that something needed to be touched, an anchor to bring you back into reality and provide salvation. 

Levi stirred, awakened by your faint mumbles and clutching hand, fully coherent in seconds as he watched you in the throes of a struggle. It was like before, slices of (e/c) and clenched fists, nonsensical garbled words which he was all too familiar with and he suppressed panic, reminding himself that you were not comatose anymore, just processing internally, categorizing reality from make-believe so your brain could be freed of it's shackles. Speaking in soothing tones, the man stroked at your skin, explaining how he was here and nothing bad would befall you, protection in motion which he only hoped you could hear. 

The silky voice cut through, violent colours turning to pastels, lilac and powder pink cuddling into you like a sea of fluffy kittens who had been specially dyed for this occasion. Paws of contentment padded at you, making all evil disappear and you smiled, happy to allow the tiny balls of fur to curl up and settle in for the rest of the night. Satisfied that you had stilled, Levi looked upon your serene face and placed a kiss on your cheek before snuggling in to sleep again. A barely discernable mutter came from your lips, gentle words causing the male to suppress a laugh. 

"We need cat food…"

~~~~~

Come morning, you arose to the sound of rain drumming against the windows, a noise which spoke of comfort and security. No cloudy mind met you, fully aware of your surroundings and in possession of all the facts - you were home, with Levi, having been released from hospital. Sighing at the unexpected clarity, you looked to one side, slumbering individual free from their usual stony expression, a view you'd been lucky enough to witness virtually now transported into the real world. 

Turning your head, the time shone out to inform that it was nearly half eight in the morning and you realised the mail would have arrived, mild urgency in your now tense frame. What about work? Had anyone spoken to the managers? 

"Shit…" Suddenly needing to make contact, you used throbbing muscles to locate your phone, device placed on the sheets so you could tap on it without holding the thing up. With effort, you sent a message to Eren, weak finger dabs made and the relevant button was pressed, text delivered as you lay worrying about such a simple thing. Surely some kind of process had been started? 

The brunette looked at his screen with a frown, machinery buzzing as envelopes were sliced, daily offerings now a two-man job as it had been in recent weeks and would be for some time. The words on his display were jumbled, like someone had run another language through a translation programme and come up with this odd combination. 

"Jean? What does this mean?"

The other worker joined him, leaning over from behind as palms gripped his waist, any excuse to have physical contact nowadays. Your accident had hit them hard, stark reminder given that at any point, life could be cruelly wrenched away. Brown eyes looked down, strange message taken in and rearranged. 

"She wants to know if anyone told work about what happened."

"How did you get that from her text?"

"Switch it round, Eren." He did as requested, moving pieces in his head to form a coherent sentence. 

"Ah ok." Levi had explained yesterday before they left the hospital, all your doctor's warnings passed on but to see the manifestation of your injury was a sombre blow. "Oh (F/N). What if she never gets any better with this, Jean?"

"I'm sure she will. If not though, she could get a job doing Yoda impressions?"

"Jean!" 

"What? I'm keeping it lively. It's what (F/N) would have wanted."

"She's not dead, you idiot!"

"I know that, shit for brains!" As was now the norm, their heated spat was channelled into something more worthwhile, face to face and lips connecting strongly as Eren squeezed harshly at his partner's behind, hands full of ass and grip tight, just how he liked to be handled. "Ow! Eren!"

"Oh shut up, you love it."

"Maybe in bed, not in the middle of work."

"Jean, you're just begging for me to do it harder, aren't you?" Hazel and emerald connected, fight and lust within their eyes and Jean winked, giving the go ahead to be provided with a strong grasp. Complying, the shorter male coaxed a squeak from the other and grinned, winning smile full of manly triumph. Before they could get anywhere near the point of inappropriate in the extreme, a screeching noise alerted them to a jammed letter, mail being scraped through the blades and in danger of total annihilation. Sighing, Eren released his hold and hoisted up his phone, pointing to the machine. "You sort that out, I'll text (F/N) back." 

A buzz brought you from that just-woken-up feeling of daydreams and you dragged your stare from the ceiling, poking the screen to see what awaited. Eren had replied, starting off with well wishes and a lot of emojis, string of faces and pictures apparently telling a story, one which you couldn't decipher so gave up trying, actual words moved on to. 

'Yea they were told, your doctor contacted them yesterday again too, you've been signed off for two months. Didn't he say anything to you?'

"Fucking no he didn't! Two months?"

"Whassat?" 

You'd disturbed Levi, sorrowful look passed his way as you watched heavenly grey emerge, slits of white growing wider as full consciousness was attained, the day dawning for yet another soul. 

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up."

"No…it's ok, I don't want to lie in too late anyway, I'll get a fucking headache." A pale hand rubbed at a yawning face, morning process starting with a recon of the current situation - he was at your place, finally, having slept by your side for real, you were safe and alive. Good. "What's up?"

"Eren says I've been signed off work for two months?"

"Yea?"

"You knew?"

"(F/N), they told us before we left." He didn't want you to feel bad about the lapse in memory and smiled lightly. "You were busy getting prodded by Hange, don't worry. Your office will probably send a letter or something."

"Oh…ok then." Struggling to recall when you'd been informed of this, you latched onto the blatant lie and began to tell yourself it had occurred when being checked over, untruth much more palatable and a sudden matter arose, pride stashed away as you closed your lids. "Levi? I need to pee." 

"Well, seeing as you've only just woken up, I'll be nice and carry you, hmm?"

"Thanks, that would be good." 

Once relieved, you'd brushed your teeth with little assistance, chair from your kitchen table now situated in the bathroom for ease, last night's unceremonious seat on the floor something neither of you wanted to do again. After a quick wash, which you could administer alone whilst on the new addition, you'd been delivered once more to your bed, wardrobe picked through on your instructions so now you sat on the couch, fully clothed in baggy sweats and a tee. 

Levi brewed drinks, your cocoa kisses stash having been located with a sly glance and before long, you were joined on the sofa, cup set on the table within reach. You weren't convinced lifting was in your repertoire yet and decided to allow the beverage to cool before risking scalding your skin. 

"So, shopping? Is that place down the end of the road still open?"

"It is, I always go there."

"Sensible choice, (F/N). I hate chain stores. Lifeless and shitty." He grabbed the notebook which sat on the surface, left there at some point over three weeks ago and found a pen hooked into the pages, written lines still within. "Sorry, did you need this?" Levi passed it over, your strength capable of holding the light object an inch from your lap and you smiled, head shaken loosely. 

"No I don't, but you do."

"Oh?"

"I never did get a chance to mail it. Was going to hide it in your suitcase." You handed it back, silver orbs trailing across your neat script which told of concentration and a steady speed, not rushed like you had to get the utterances out quickly, no - this had been deliberated, planned and beautifully executed. 

'Dearest Levi,

Your way with words excites me if I'm honest, it's nice to know someone so truthful and amusingly grumpy. But I can see through it, as I'm sure you're already aware, and for that I thank you, I appreciate you letting me in and allowing me to see the real you. 

As for feeling alive, you turn my world into a peaceful sanctuary, every single little moment spent together making me giddy like a teen with a crush. Well, age aside, I guess I am that person, but 'crush' is the wrong word...'in deep and not about to let you go' would be more accurate. 

I've often been told that I throw myself into things with too much enthusiasm, get attached too easily, and you are no different Levi. I hope that doesn't put you off or make you want to run a mile because I really believe we could be amazing, you and me. No changing the universe or anything that others would call noteworthy, but damn, it would certainly change my universe for the better. I'm nothing special or unique, but with you I feel that I am.

So yes, when we meet, it's going to be fucking incredible and I only pray that I can make you as happy in person. 

Thank you again for your letter, the sensation of belonging you've given me is unreal and I agree that it's easier to write certain things down so I've opted for that too. 

In conclusion Levi, I can't wait to hold you close.

Until that day,

Yours always,

(F/N).

PS you didn't sound like an idiot, you're actually better at this than you let on.'

Levi paused, unable to speak as he read it again, carefully absorbing everything you'd committed to paper and loving the whole piece. One thing shone out and he decided to go for that, flawlessly skirting around the tightness in his throat. 

"(F/N), you are special and unique to me. No one else enjoys my company for any amount of time. No one else sends me thoughtful gifts or listens to my shit gratefully on a daily basis. Some of my gripes are deeper seated as you know, and the support you've shown is incredible. Don't put yourself down."

"I'm not Levi, it's more just that I'm, I dunno. Normal."

"Oh, and I'm not?"

His playful stare made you smile and your hand reached out to grab hold of his top in a fragile grip, one that existed nonetheless. In a show of power you'd thought would take weeks to emerge, you pulled the man to your body, caught him off guard in the process and you were pressed together, emotions running higher than if your stay in hospital hadn't happened - it had brought you closer, allowed a proximity which only trauma could deliver and you intended to use this as a positive incident in your life, turn it around and become even stronger. 

"Levi…" 

Gentle lips touched yours, passionate and searching as a soul-bursting kiss ensued, your palms on the small of his back and resting easily there whilst you were pushed further into the cushions. Levi stroked everywhere he could find, slow and adoring, how you deserved to be treated and he flicked his tongue over your pout, deepening proceedings with the same languid motions. Breathing deeply, you reciprocated as best you could, mind blank of anything other than this one person causing tingles through your weakened muscles. 

All of your dreams were beginning to come true, less fast paced than expected but still, here was one thing you'd fantasized about on countless occasions, finally free to enjoy such pleasures. Levi hummed with satisfaction, ecstatic to be able to taste you, do what he'd envisaged for so long and a low growl was wrenched from within, knowing he had to stop but incapable of doing so. Moving down, he lavished tiny pecks on your neck, pulling stifled moans from inside of you at the tender kisses. You swum into oblivion, all thoughts cancelled as concentration was on one human alone, your palms creeping higher to explore further, envelop this man and bring him into your being. 

Levi felt the soft rubs and small squeezes, lifted high by your energy, motions which told of mindless effort - without realising it, you were progressing even more. Banishing any thoughts of work and recovery to one side, he moved back up to claim your lips once again, body melding into yours easily like you'd been created to fit together, two pieces of a puzzle. 

The buzzer to your apartment shouted it's horrific tone, a harsh sound that made you both jump, your untrained muscles creating something of a comical flinch and Levi smirked, leaving you with a wink. 

"I'll get it." 

Calming himself, the pale man strode to the door and tried to get rid of the bulge in his pants, contain his lust for now as you were in no condition to do much. Perhaps also slightly selfish in motivation, he wanted to wait so he could feel your passion, your strength, your need. Doing no favours for the throbbing below, he shook his head and picked up the intercom, voice stern as he greeted whoever it was.

"Yes?"

"Oh, good morning Sir! I'm selling…"

"No." Slamming the receiver down, he grumbled whilst making his way back to you, frown on his brows. "You're not selling me shit. Idiots, it's still fucking early, don't they have any respect?" 

You weren't often home at this time during the working week, unaware of such unsolicited visitors who obviously stood downstairs pressing every single button on the panel outside, hoping that at least one person would bite. 

"Got to make a living somehow, I guess."

"They should get a proper job." Flopping down, Levi leant in and nudged you with a shoulder. "Ok, here it is. Plan for the day. You write me a list, I'll go shopping, breakfast then the hard stuff. Legs."

"Sounds good." It did, promise of further exercise both daunting but needed - the sooner you could get back to peak condition, the better. It wasn't just him who had a problem with controlling desire and your still flushed cheeks spoke volumes, silver eyes glancing over to take in the wonderful hue he'd created. Mentally stepping away from that thought, Levi passed the pen and paper across, your letter folded to one side and now ready to join the others. 

It had been difficult to grip the writing tool, simple motions made harder by a lack of skill but you managed it, pushed yourself to get words onto the white lined surface and now you held a slightly messy yet useable list, one which was stashed in a pocket. Shrugging his coat on, the man looked outside and tutted. 

"At least the temperature's gone up but that is one hell of a fucking downpour."

"Umbrellas are in the cupboard by the door?"

"Thanks." 

Selecting a black one from a strangely large collection, Levi held it aloft and wiggled the item.

"Why do you have so many?"

"Always forget to take one, end up having to buy another." 

"You could start a fucking museum, (F/N). Right, hopefully I won't get washed away. You? Practise writing again."

"Yessir." A weak salute was given and he nodded, smiles shared before he left. As the journey was made, he took your note out and scowled down. Of course it was shaky and scribbled, however you seemed to have swapped every single T and E around, fluid words joined together which suggested you had no idea about the slip - the doctors did say confusion around language would occur and Levi decided to take this as an amusingly adorable yet temporary issue, reminder made to work on your spelling. 

After purchasing things like 'bueer' and 'applts', he returned home, bags full and bulging to be placed in cupboards, bring the kitchen back to life and he looked to the sofa, your slumbering form still clutching a pen and grip spasming around it. Writing was apparently hard work. Smiling kindly, Levi stashed the groceries quietly, frequently glancing round to check on you - the leg exercises could wait. For now, he was happy just to watch you sleep and read the latest letter you'd given him, probably ten times over; it was the most emotional thing anyone had ever said to him and he needed to memorize those words, take them to the grave and covet your thoughts. That way, he would forever be contented.


	17. Work And Play

Sweat shone on your skin, a show of what you were putting yourself through. You hadn't ventured outside in the two weeks since you'd been home, a fortnight spent working hard and coached all the while by what could only be described as one tough bastard. 

"Harder (F/N). Come on."

"I'm doing it as…fuck…hard as I can…"

"Not good enough."

Rolling your eyes, you took a deep breath and pushed, forcing your feet against Levi's hands. You were laid on your back in bed, legs up as he knelt in front of you, applying pressure for you to shove forwards onto. Half an hour, you thought. Half an hour of this and cycle kicks, bringing your knees to your face…it was tiring, physically exhausting and you knew it wouldn't end here, your naps having become less frequent and it felt like every waking moment was spent in some kind of excruciating pose. 

Hange had arranged house visits, happy to be allowed out of the hospital walls and she brought equipment, did her checks and tests in your apartment and everything seemed to be in order, the woman impressed by your progress. Eren and Jean came by regularly, as did members of society who felt the need to interrupt by hailing you via intercom, mostly chased away with a grumpy threat. 

Levi worked you to the limit, proud of how far you'd come and he kept up your writing too, less mistakes occurring with each day that passed. Silver eyes gleamed as he watched you break through yet another barrier, pain chased away and determination on your flushed features. As was becoming the norm, he smirked and gave a harsher push, sending your thigh back. 

"Hey! I wasn't ready for that!"

"I need to see what you're capable of, (F/N). Do my research."

Orbs twinkling in response, you smiled and strengthened your limbs, returning the move as your usual innuendo started up.

"Research, eh?" Another lunge. "By now you'll have a whole book's worth of positions you want to put me in."

"I'm cataloguing, definitely." Levi upped his muscular resistance, met by your solid wall of power. "I must say, I do like to see you spread out, legs in the air." 

"How about when you had me on all fours, Levi?" 

"Certainly a favourite. We'll do that next. Two more minutes and then I'll throw you down."

"If I let you." Teasing and training at the same time, you gave a sly look and pushed with everything you had, snarl accompanying the move and suddenly your right foot slipped, flying out of Levi's grasp and you kicked him square in the face, man yelping and covering the offended area with his hands. You dropped your screaming limbs, panting with exertion and mouth gaping. "I'm so sorry Levi! Are you ok?" Muffled words came from behind his guard, grumbling yet playful. 

"Fuck…I hope so. Jesus…" Removing his palms, he checked them for blood and wrinkled his nose, throbbing pain dull and confirming nothing was broken. "You're doing well, (F/N). That fucking hurt."

"Sorry, I didn't mean to!"

In response to your apology, he collapsed down on top of you, hands either side of your head and mouth close. 

"You're lucky."

"Why?" 

"If Eren wasn't due round, I'd be putting you through much harder training right now."

"How does that make me lucky?" Cocking a brow, you used what strength remained and wrapped your legs around his body, bringing him further in and he growled, nose bumping with yours. It was becoming urgent, neither of you fully in control of your libidos right now, yet the waiting was exquisite, self imposed torment adding to your determination and you both knew it, used that to create a faster recovery. Picking up where you left off, you tilted up and brushed against soft lips, hips lifting slightly to press into the obvious bulge below. "Do something with that and I'll be lucky."

Before anything heated could occur, a knock sounded at the door and Levi groaned, giving you one chaste kiss and disappearing to let your friend in. You laughed, spent and prone whilst calling out. 

"I can't get up!"

"Yes you can, (F/N). Don't be lazy...hey Eren. She'll be through in a minute."

The men waited in the living area, brunette sitting down whilst the man of the house flicked the kettle on, two sets of eyes watching as you crawled into view. It was how you navigated the apartment usually, especially after a work out, calf muscles not yet steady enough for solo walking. A few steps had been made with Levi's help, shaking and slow, but to do it alone was much more daunting. Eren grinned, betraying the sadness in his stare and he spoke with forced hilarity. 

"It's like you've got a pet, Levi."

"Yea. I should get her a leash."

"Woah woah woah, not while I'm here guys. Please." He'd gotten acquainted with the pair of you, knew how difficult keeping away from one another was and had seen it escalate to much filthier talk recently. Stopping that dead, he held back the need to aid you onto the couch and let you do it yourself, body clambering up to flop next to him. You took one look, saw sorrow in the strangely blank emerald pools and became stoic instantly. 

"What's wrong?" 

Taking his hand in a weak grasp, you were aware of Levi turning to provide privacy as he busied himself in the kitchen, brewing tea and shifting utensils needlessly. A small voice replied, one lacking the usual passion and fire. 

"It's Jean. I think he's…I don't even know. He seems weird."

"Like how?"

"Distant. Snappy. Doesn't want to touch me the past couple of days."

"Oh Eren." You reached up, stroking a tanned cheek in support and bringing back current events to try and soothe his heart. "Didn't he just tell you that he loved you?"

"Yea…"

"And he meant it, right?"

"I guess…"

"No Eren, no guesses. He did. I could tell by the way he couldn't detach himself from you last week. So it must be something else."

"But what?"

"I don't know. But I do know you don't just confess love and then go all cold." Racking your brains, you went through every possibility, understanding how Jean worked - if he had a problem or doubts in his life, he'd likely mask them with flippant comments or snarky replies, so to have visible emotions must mean he was processing a serious issue. However you doubted it had anything to do with his boyfriend, the couple so obviously committed to each other and you found inspiration, one thing which could explain it all. "He was contacted about a job, right? To do with his exams?"

"Yea, but that's a good thing?"

"Career-wise, yes. Think about it though Eren. He works with you every day. Maybe he doesn't want to leave that behind?" 

"Maybe."

"Talk to him, Eren. Please."

"Ok (F/N). I will. Thank you." You smiled, saw hope in the man's gaze and hot beverages were delivered, your body tapped to suggest you should move over to let Levi sit. Squeezing in, he leant against you and got comfortable, still warmed by your ability to provide solace and advice despite your own struggles. Also, your progress had opened up a door, previous plans able to be realised, perhaps even this afternoon and the chat turned to your mail room, stories shared and light conversations lifting the mood. 

Eren had left with a meaningful glare from you, promises made to speak with his partner at the end of his lunch break and you sighed, back against fluffy cushions and ready to sleep. 

"Oh no you don't (F/N)."

"Levi, I can't do any more. Besides, I don't want to hurt you again."

"Tch. Fuck that. We're going out."

"Huh?"

"Come on then, get dressed properly. I'm taking you for a treat."

"A treat?"

"Yes. You deserve it." 

Sparks of excitement ran through you, anticipation at being in the fresh air combining with the secrecy and you took his offered arm, steady walk to the bedroom made by wobbling legs. 

The trip from your home to the ground floor took a while, even by elevator and once the foyer exit was reached, you looked up into grey eyes, pleading and unsure. 

"I'm not sure how much further I can go."

"Don't worry. It's not far. I've got you, (F/N)." 

Clinging on, you allowed the assistance and held tight, male arms keeping you safe and away from the crowds of people who would likely bump into you without a second thought. Your still relatively frail form was taken carefully around a corner, an impressive building you'd seen before now approached and you gasped, not expecting this at all. 

"The spa?"

"Yup."

"I can't imagine you enjoying that kind of thing, Levi."

"Don't be silly. I love strangers touching me." 

Giggling at his delivery, you entered the grand edifice and were sat gently in a soft seat, man checking in at the desk. He'd booked this over a week ago, open pass meaning it could be used when desired and he decided today was the day, short journey attainable now. You looked around, golden fittings and regal furniture speaking of decadence and Levi joined you again, a woman delivering two glasses of champagne and a kind of menu. None of your medication advised no alcohol so you shrugged, touching the drink to the one held out beside you. 

"Thanks Levi. This is amazing."

"You're welcome." You both sipped, the bubbly liquid sure to go straight to your head as the longest period of sobriety you could remember had been in force until now, five weeks without a drink. "I told them about your situation. They've marked the things that might help." Looking at the card you'd been given, you saw treatments were circled, deep massages and a lot of descriptions that included the word 'relaxing.' 

"Wow. They do shit loads. How do we pick?"

"Personally, I'm going for the sauna. Sitting still and doing nothing sounds good right now."

"Levi?"

"Yea?"

"I know I'm not supposed to say this and did already a second ago, but thank you. Honestly. You're putting yourself through a lot for me and I want you to know how much I appreciate it."

"I do know, (F/N)." You locked gazes, trying to convey to this man just what an incredible individual he was and Levi nodded once, understanding and leaving words to one side - the pair of you could express feelings in writing just fine, but vocally? It was a struggle. "So, what do you like the look of?"

Back to business, you gulped a little too deeply at the glass and hiccupped, small laugh given in response and you spotted your first choice from the list. 

"Well…there's one, but I don't think you'd be up for it, Levi."

"Try me." 

You pointed, his face draining of the already light colour he suited so well and you smiled. 

"If you could get me there though, please?"

"Sure. Then I'm running a fucking mile."

After an hour you'd been waxed within an inch of your life, buffed and varnished, ready to go. Go for what, you weren't entirely sure but it made you feel feminine again and Levi appeared on cue, his own fluffy white robe matching yours, fuzzy slippers on his feet and black hair swept back - he looked gorgeous, a simple change to his locks allowing a view you could get used to. Not to say he wasn't always impeccable, but this was something else. 

"You…umm…" Blushing like a school girl, you giggled and shuffled slowly to the next destination, his time in the sauna having done wonders. 

"That was much more enjoyable than having hot wax placed on my skin. You ok?"

"Yea, you get used to it after a while." 

"Fuck that." 

Massages were shared, both of you thoroughly relaxed and like someone had turned your bones to liquid, buzzing from expert touches and just the right amount of pressure. Part of the package included a meal too, time to unwind and converse as if you were a normal couple, nothing untoward going on and you took the chance gladly, pretending this was your first day together and forgetting any troubles. Light chat was held, avoiding the topic of your past two weeks and Levi stared over, red wine in hand as he watched you positively glow, animated story being described of a particularly memorable family day out. You spoke with a slight sadness but refused to be dampened; your relatives were gone, you'd overcome your demons and used that ability to prevail well. Had you not learnt from the past, your recovery may have had a totally different outlook. 

Steely eyes took you all in - the enthusiasm, a new lease of life almost and he smiled, convinced that the next month and a half would see you return to peak condition. 

The slow walk home was made even more sedate by full bellies, satisfied bodies that still held a warmth which came from a pampering session, your gratitude sincere but scarce. You'd get in trouble for thanking him so much. Once indoors, shoes were stashed and the man sat down, a strange weariness accompanying such a decadent afternoon and he sighed, wanting to get up and pour you both a drink but so incapacitated that it seemed such an arduous task. Lazy but attentive eyes gazed on as you circled the apartment, using the wall for support but remaining upright, your first lone journey and he kept quiet, allowing the moment to remain as unsullied and special as could be.

You'd been inspired, this morning's strength combined with immense de-stressing setting you up for a burst of energy and now was the time to check out how far you could get, albeit with the aid of the surrounding plaster work. Step by step, your feet planted down carefully and you paid no heed to the protests from below, internally told any aches or twinges that they could fuck off and leave you be. The kitchen was reached, elbows on the surface as you opened the fridge, bottle of white brought out carefully and little nudging paces to your left commenced, lower arms still braced on a faux marble counter and glasses were retrieved. Not having thought through your exit strategy, you hung your head and started to laugh, a gleeful noise which held nothing but humour. 

"Levi, I might be able to get this shit together but I can't bring it over."

"Tch. Nothing like doing half a job, (F/N)." No malice was intended, smile on his lips as he joined you, a rather forceful hug commencing and a soft voice spoke into your hair. "I'm so fucking proud of you. So fucking proud." 

"I wouldn't be standing here if it weren't for you though Levi." Stopping short of saying the 'T' word, you conveyed as much with your own squeeze and shrieked, having just been picked up swiftly and caught off guard. Via the same way you'd entered your home on day one, Levi delivered you to the couch and placed you down gently, bodies pressed together and shared joy causing your souls to fly high into the skies, lifted incredibly by a seemingly simple walk, one which in reality had taken quite some effort and nerve. 

"No, you've done this (F/N). I'm just the drill sergeant. Don't sell yourself short." 

"So does this mean we get to do our tour?"

"Sure. Maybe not now though. I'm rather enjoying where I am, to be honest." Back where you'd been before many many times, an adoring and sedate kiss began, roaming hands moving with a sense of knowing - somehow your triumph signalled a switch, a change in pace which neither of you were about to ignore.


	18. Time Heals

An unspoken moment had occurred, discussions without words shared and you gazed up into soft grey, similarly clouded (e/c) searching the silvery hues above and passing on a message loud and clear. Levi took your lips gently at first, still full of admiration following your walk and caring hands ran through (h/c) hair, fingers tickling in sensual waves. Reaching round, you slid your palms under his black shirt, warm skin discovered not for the first time, however this was different, deeper and held a previously missing sense of gravity. 

Pecking at one another's mouths, you filled the apartment with the sound of contentment, sighs and muted moans accompanying the rustle of clothing and you pushed upwards, body pressing into the hot form above as your hands brought Levi's hips down to yours. 

"Fuck (F/N)…" He ground against you, pout trailing over yours and the man offered a tiny laugh. "You sure?"

"Yes. Fucking positive." 

Throughout your flirtatious and suggestive fortnight, no real conversation had been held around this subject, the occasional confirmation given of your birth control and clear test results from the past mentioned in passing - it could be quite the mood killer to start bringing up such subjects when you got down to it and Levi stood, offering his grip in a gentlemanly pose. Taking the pale hand, you were pulled to your feet, unsteady yet able, however he had other ideas. Yet again you were lifted into a strong cradle, your gazes locked the whole way as the bedroom was entered, body laid down like a precious package. He joined you instantly, kiss revisited with more fervour and you stroked your tongue against his, humming into the embrace and wrapping your arms around a muscular frame. 

Fingers danced around fabric, buttons were undone and slowly but surely, you pushed one another's clothes away, assistance given where needed and mouths rarely parting company. Lying tangled together, you dared to delve into uncharted territory, Levi's physique witnessed on many occasions however always with the addition of underwear and you slid a hand beneath the waistband of dark boxers, squeezing lightly at the newly found cheek. A huff of approval met your move and you smirked against wet lips, his own curling show of amused passion meeting yours. 

"Want something, (F/N)?"

You grinned now, thumbs tugging at elastic impatiently, the buzz of today's treatments still washing over you both to create the perfect setting and he wriggled out of his remaining item, eager to balance the world and make things even. Kissing strongly, Levi ensured that he didn't act on impulse, didn't use the countless weeks worth of want and desire to rip your bra away and instead used simple touches, almost barely there in fact and you shivered, light and feathery brushes sending you insane as the man slipped fabric out of the way. Panties followed, two naked bodies now entwined on the bed, sighs and squeaks filling the room. 

Stretching down, you started to rub at Levi's erection, hot flesh in your grip but he kindly pushed your hand to the side, features surfacing and teeth dragging on your bottom lip. 

"No (F/N). I'm looking after you right now." He smiled, a small gesture which lit you up all the same and those beautiful grey eyes shifted lower, light sucks and licks gracing your nipple.

"Shit…Levi…" It felt like your nerves had become super sensitive since the accident, every single pull and ache magnified, yet that evidently also had it's benefits, whole being stimulated and shaking because of the delicious sensations. He moved, paying identical attention to your other breast and squeezing at the one left behind, looking up to your open mouth and enraptured expression. This was his dream, to have you all to himself and make you alive with pleasure, drive you wild but take care of you at the same time, reverent behaviour his only requirement. 

You'd never been handled so gently, with so much protection and the man who forced you to work your ass off every day certainly had a softer side, one which manifested in an amazingly seductive way. One day, you thought. One day you would be in a physical position to give Levi the same exquisite joy. He slid back up, on one elbow and his free palm cupped your face, tiny pecks shared and words whispered in between.

"(F/N)…I want you to know…how ridiculously…fucking gorgeous you are…" 

"Mmm…quite the catch yourself…Levi...you did…tell me that once…" 

"I did…and see? It's…all true…" 

Smiling, the pair of you recalled all of the build up, each letter, call, Skype, that first kiss, everything brought to the fore and it became too intense to bear, lust combining with desperate and deep need, finally able to share yourselves with one another after all this time. No more reassurance was needed - Levi knew you were ready for this, had confirmed as much and he wasn't going to press the matter. Melting in to form one sentient being, you both tried to become the other, drink up someone else's essence, let it complete your souls and you gasped lightly, male groan of contentment joining in to announce that one indescribable moment of eventually reaching what you'd been missing all of your life. 

Entering you slowly, Levi took his time, savoured every second until he'd filled you completely, two humans in a situation which at one point seemed destined never to happen, yet here you were, breaths shared and noses touching. You lifted a leg, foot on the sheets to press against him and a hand took your thigh, strokes and squeezes applied as the pale man drew out, back inside again in a sedate and purposeful pace. 

"(F/N)…oh god…" 

Keeping in time with the languid and caring motions, you rolled easily upwards, hips able to take this speed and your palms searched everywhere, feverish exploration in stark contrast to the measured thrusts. You trembled lightly, partly through effort but mainly from pure sexual glee, amazed at the way Levi moved, how he could make you feel, spots he could rub against to send you reeling. 

"Yes…Levi…"

Now was not the time for dirty talk or energetic and experimental positions, as had been joked about - it contained nothing but an already sturdy bond being solidified in the most delightful way, a couple brought closer with every push and moan. Levi gazed into your gleaming eyes, revelled in your beauty and had to assure himself that yes, this was happening and yes, it was fucking amazing. He never had any doubt about the latter, however your stay in hospital put the brakes on, allowed you to weave a powerful partnership before embarking on the physical, time he now wouldn't change for the world. 

You clutched kindly at raven hair, ran the strands through shaking fingers and pulled him in, mouths connected again and working together with that same deliberate pace, bodies gliding in perfect unison. The kiss was broken as Levi pushed up, palms either side of your head and you gaped, adjusting also to allow a different angle which caused you both to call out, your view most definitely one to remember. Onyx locks spilled around pink tainted cheeks, wet lips were parted, silver pools swam with pearly tones and you glanced down, saw the muscular abdomen that curled beautifully in time with your own. 

"Jesus Levi…ohhhh fuck…"

"Ahhh (F/N)…yea…you're fucking amazing…" 

Levi dropped again, wanting to feel every inch of your flesh and he tickled at your thigh once more, alternating between soft brushes and tight kneading flexes, touch running up your side and halting, (h/c) hair combed through with care. The intensity of such an unhurried event made itself known, your mewls in harmony with his, dainty words spoken amongst heavy breaths and groans, pecks increasing and peppering one another's skin. When you gripped strongly to his back and let out the most incredible whimper of lust, Levi was sure he'd found happiness on a whole other level - giving himself to someone already so special held such meaning, such power and he clenched his teeth, holding off the swelling tide in his stomach. 

Digging in gently with your fingers, you tugged and begged for the man above to get closer, an impossible task yet you wanted to be merged, become a singular being and the world started to melt away into shades of warm orange, colours still playing a major part in your brain activity and these were most welcome, a vivid glow around the inexplicably handsome male who sent you to another plain of existence. Only one thing was real, one person, one name…Levi. Levi. Levi. 

You chanted it out loud without realising, peak in reach as you shook lightly, weakened physique no longer screaming at you to stop, no. It spurred you on, gave you a drive which was previously lacking and the final seconds were surely upon you, entire self floating in fluffy clouds of euphoria and ready to freefall. 

Hearing his name, Levi lost control, the first time you'd ever spoken it ringing in his ears and he panted swiftly, pushing inside of your breathtaking warmth as he was delivered to a place which felt like home, familiarity adding to his arousal and grey discs watched your descent into ecstasy, noted every single change in your expression and mentally knelt in awe at the astounding beauty. 

"(F/N), ohhhh shit (F/N)…"

"Levi I…ahhh…I…" 

All that remained was to give small squeals and deep growls of release, your bodies bursting and souls entwined as desired. Bones rattled, minds crashed into oblivion and you cried out, legs wrapped around the man's waist like a vice and he groaned loudly, last thrusts insanely deep as your orgasm turned the room into a rich purple hue, Levi's shouts drawing out your pleasure further and he gave up, the tightening sensation from your climax sending him over the precipice and he came hard, eye contact maintained throughout as you observed one another's purity - often considered a dirty or taboo occurrence, this was anything but that, a simple way to say what you sometimes couldn't. 

"Holy shit…" 

Struggling for oxygen, Levi laid kiss after kiss on your lips, palms stroking tenderly and you remained in place for a while, no requirement to move just yet so you enjoyed one another a little bit longer, buzzing and satiated. Pulls in your abdomen sent sparks as you rolled to the side, still in the same embrace and you smiled against a warm mouth, giggles springing out. 

"I think we found a new version of physio, Levi." 

"It certainly beats being kicked in the fucking face." 

After succumbing to real life, you'd both risen and dressed in nightwear, nothing awaiting you outside of the apartment and you snuggled closely on the couch, blanket draped across your bodies and a film on TV, the perfect end to a perfect day. 

~~~~~~

Five days after the one which had changed your world, you stood in the kitchen surveying the food on offer in your refrigerator, hunger settling upon you heavily. Levi was out, gathering more supplies to fill the cupboards again and you grinned to yourself, sure that the exercises he put you through were lessening in intensity due to the new version of work outs which had been discovered, time away from your jobs certainly being spent well. A new passion had been released, the pair of you incapable of keeping your hands off and you felt like a weight was lifted, all of the suffering and pain worth it tenfold - if it meant taking a further step into the relationship, then your efforts were even more important than just self improvement. You had a goal, a point to strive towards which was illuminated by becoming closer to one particular man. 

Selecting a jar, you placed it on the surface and leant your arms either side of the snack, upper body still holding your lower steady during extensive leg use. About to liberate the food, you were stopped by a shrill note, intercom shouting for attention and you slammed the jar down before making the arduous trip to answer. It could be Levi, lost the key? Eren or Jean, forgotten to bring the spare? The parcel you'd ordered? Tiny shuffled steps took you round the apartment, final gap closed in a lunge and with burning lungs, you answered in a hoarse whisper.

"Hello?"

"Could I interest you in…" 

Hanging up harshly, the realisation hit that you used to be someone who had time for these kinds of people, chatted and listened to what they had to say but times changed, people changed and you were as grumpy as Levi right now. Return journey underway, you focussed on the need to eat and pushed yourself to the limit, knees braced and calf muscles stinging like crazy. Finally at your destination, you tried to twist the lid yet achieved nothing, weak hands keeping you from sustenance and a knot of impatient rage grew inside your chest, almost like adrenaline but this wasn't fight or flight, it was cry or scream. 

That all became horrifically worse as the battle continued, a few minutes of useless grips and snarls still leaving you empty, consideration actually given to smashing the thing open and then the punchline arrived, another piercing buzz and you gave a wretched whine, resorting to the old crawling method this time as energy was a thing of the past. Taking your jar without realising, you managed to kneel up to reach the receiver, plastic snagged and it dropped, dangling from the curly cable. You snatched it up, fraught voice asking who it was. 

"Hi there, I'm from number 18, I locked myself out and no one else is answering, could you let me in?"

Your vision was clouding and you fought against harsh colours, the ability to string a sentence together seeming so far from reach and a tiny, begging tone answered without energy.

"I…I can't get up…help…"

"Huh? You gonna let me in or what?"

"I can't reach it…"

"Oh come on love, just press the damn button." 

Tears formed in the corners of your eyes, hot and bitter as you seemed to take three paces back in terms of recovery, struggling to even kneel up and stretch. Mustering all of your strength, you yelled and hit home, electronic click allowing your neighbour into the building and you heard a grumble, the aided individual evidently unimpressed with your assistance. 

The intercom hung down, off the hook and you could hear the outside world through the connection - traffic, people, sirens, music, footsteps, tyres, arguments…invaded by too much all at once, you dragged yourself towards the couch, not even making it that far and stopping in the middle of the room, cross legged and hunched over, jar cradled in your lap and sobs loud. 

That was how Levi found you ten minutes later, his groceries forgotten and dropped to the floor regardless of eggs or glass items and he rushed over, on his knees and holding you close. 

"What happened (F/N)? Are you hurt?" 

"N-no I'm p-pissed off." Speaking through hitched breaths, you hated how childish you sounded, something which pushed you over the edge. "I was hungry, I c-can't even get the lid off and everyone's fucking buzzing me and asking shit and I can't do it Levi, I'm not cut out for this…I…" 

A soothing hand rubbed your back and Levi pressed his lips together, single clear course of action in mind and he rose, placing the receiver in it's home to cancel out the noise. Almost instantly it went off again, snarl of rage accompanying your stressed wail and he shouted to whoever had dared to interrupt. 

"What the fuck do you want?"

"Umm…delivery?"

"Leave it in the foyer."

"But…"

"I said leave it in the fucking foyer." He was back by your side in an instant, small smile on his features as he brushed your hair back, chin taken by a gentle thumb and forefinger to tilt your face upwards and you frowned, unsure why he looked so serene. "(F/N), you're coming with me."

"Huh?" 

Steel orbs flashed as they observed your tear stained skin, other thumb wiping the wet trails away with a miniscule laughing huff. 

"To my place. Get some fucking peace and quiet. Sure, people knock on the door there too, but if I tell them to back the fuck off, they will."

"To...yours?"

"Yes. Fresh air. Well, wind that will batter you daily but it's preferable over the thoughtless bastards in this city." He paused, thinking it through. "It's time, (F/N). Time to give yourself a break and heal." 

It made total sense, a tranquil setting to see out the rest of your recovery and you matched his smile. 

"Are you sure?"

"What, a chance to show the whole town my amazing woman? Fuck yes." He said it without life but his gaze, as always, betrayed such an emotionless statement and you let out a final sob of gratitude. "And don't thank me, (F/N). Isn't this the kind of thing we do for those we love?" The steady pace of a clock ticking through the day met the words and you watched as his eyes widened ever so slightly, admittance evidently unexpected. Levi felt his whole body freeze, form tensed up at expressing himself so freely, a sensation he was most certainly not used to and he tried it out in his head again. Love. Such a throw-away set of letters and sounds, ones spoken so easily and often lacking truth however he'd meant it fully, mind apparently aware of it even if he hadn't been until now and warmth began to spread through his icy muscles as he surrendered to the honesty. "So, you gonna pack or what?" 

"Levi…"

"Pack. I'll call Mike, find out what the fucking weather's like." 

"But…"

"Now."

Content with his utterance yet still unable to discuss this, Levi stood and helped you up, the stare you gave him holding the world inside, vivid (e/c) that swam in moisture still but said something deeper, reciprocation presumably and thankfully, you just nodded. 

"Good." Careful steps delivered you to the bedroom, instructions provided to direct the man to your suitcase and he kept his head down, mumbling about how much of each thing you'd need and changing the subject. Before continuing, Levi realised he hadn't phoned his friend, thoughts going haywire and he sat on the mattress beside you, device in hand and eyes to the floor. You placed a hand on his thigh, trying to convey what you wanted to say but it was stuck in your throat, everything you'd done together since that first letter making a sensible conclusion to match his own. 

Reaching to the nightstand, you picked up your phone and opened the screen, glances from the right full of confusion. That was until the item he held vibrated, the pair of you still not looking at one another and he opened the text.

'I love you, Levi.' 

You hadn't said it just to be nice or save his embarrassment. This was the truest ever realisation you'd come to, had been bubbling beneath the surface for a while but it had been awakened now - how were you so stupid to not know this before? Of course you loved him. Levi nodded, staring at the electronic characters and he sighed, incredibly happy however deeply awkward, ridiculous really. A fully grown man who couldn't express what was needed. But it was ok. You weren't much better yourself. 

"You'll probably need warm clothes, (F/N)."

"I have plenty."

"Don't pack too many though. There's only so much I can fucking drag to the bus station." Finally, your eyes met and an understanding look was shared, slow blinks explaining the unspoken and you saw a twitch on his mouth, smirk creeping in that was impossible not to mirror as he gave a silky drawl. "And stop looking so pleased with yourself." Levi shuffled close and you placed your head on his shoulder, video call waiting to connect. The screen shone up from the man's lap, shaggy light hair coming into view and Mike smiled warmly. 

"And to what do I owe the pleasure?"

It looked like he was in Levi's office, a scene you'd become accustomed to and the creak of a protesting chair denoted the large male had leant back, getting comfortable. 

"Mike, you break that and you will die."

"Always with the threats, Levi."

"I mean it. We're coming over there so I can avenge it's demise."

"You're coming home?"

"Yea, both of us. Too fucking annoying in this shit hole." 

"Well in that case, you'd better bring some boots (F/N). Pretty much knee deep in rain here." 

Levi tutted and shook his head with a grumbling response. 

"Brilliant. Is it bad?"

"Put it this way - my garden now has a rather deep swimming pool."

"Oh fuck." Grey eyes looked to one side, mind seeming dark but in reality, he couldn't wait to whisk you away to a simpler life. "What about my cellar?"

"All fine."

"Good." A sniff and another far off stare finalised the weather discussion and the conversation drew to a close. "We'll take the first bus we can. Do me a favour?"

"Anything for my cheery, happy-go-lucky friend."

"Don't be smart, Mike. Ask the store to stay open? I'll be needing food."

"Sure, will do." 

After saying farewells, Levi checked the departure times, one due to leave in forty minutes, far too soon. That left another two hours until the next and if it was a simple journey with well made connections, you'd be arriving just past midnight. 

"Fuck. I can't make them keep the shop open until then." 

"Can Mike get some things?"

"He's going to have to. Least he can do after terrorising my chair." 

Swift grocery related texts were swapped as you rummaged through drawers, directed wardrobe extractions and collected toiletries, all the while sat or kneeling as you couldn't bear to stand at the moment, legs still exhausted from earlier. In a short space of time, you'd gone from a crying heap on the floor to an elated woman, the impending trip causing bursts of excitement, but mostly you thought about the confessions you had shared, love admitted to in an unusual way - how you'd reached this point was unconventional too, so it was all acceptable and par for the course. 

Sitting on a kitchen stool, you went through the refrigerator, perishables placed to one side to either make a travel snack or be handed over to their new owner, Jean on his way after a call. Eren couldn't come to say goodbye but sent his well-wishes, hope for a safe journey given. Someone had to remain at work unfortunately and seeing as he'd visited earlier, the short straw had been drawn. 

Sandwiches and nibbles were wrapped as Levi did a circuit of the apartment, picking up your important forgotten items like phone charger, medication and one of many umbrellas; he wasn't sure if it was a memory issue or just a scatty mind that had left those things out and another factor rang out like an alarm. 

"(F/N), you'd better speak to Hange."

"Oh shit. You think she'll be ok with this?"

"I don't give a fuck. We're going, end of story." Levi stood behind you, arms around your waist and chin on your shoulder, small sigh tickling at your ear. "You'll be bored out of your brain, but at least it'll be quiet."

"I can't wait, Levi. Honestly." Squeezing his muscular forearm, you smiled and leant further, pressed into a warm body and enjoying the comfort it gave. 

"And when you come back here, you'll be sprinting up those fucking stairs, (F/N). Just you wait and see." You laughed, imagining yourself making such an entrance however you quickly turned sombre, man circling to stand face to face now and searching your expression with concern. "What is it?"

"Levi…" You shrugged, hating to have this thought right now but some things couldn't be helped, the timing of real life not always impeccable. "When I come back, you'll be there and I'll be here…" 

Enveloping you into a heartfelt embrace, Levi breathed deeply and steadied himself, that day being one which he'd forbidden to surface until now and a quiet murmur met your dismay. 

"We have lots of time before then, (F/N) and I promise you, it'll be amazing."

"I know." Burying your face into warm flesh which smelt of cedarwood, you nuzzled against his neck and spoke softly. "I know it will."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I have no idea how I made it this far without a sex scene...I had to break at some point.


	19. Journey's End

Tickets had been purchased by phone, plenty seats still remaining as the full journey outwards happened rarely, especially on a week day and you were helped out of the cab, driver assisting with luggage whilst Levi attended to you. After packing, solid rest had been the order of the day to conserve energy and you tentatively stepped to the pavement, feet not as steady as usual but not due to lack of strength - returning to a place which held such bad memories was a burden on you both and you tried to ignore the feeling of dread, concentrating on the weeks ahead instead.

You hadn't spoken at any great length with Jean earlier, made a note of his uncertain demeanour however decided to leave it, not wanting Eren's doubts to become obvious as this issue was purely between them. Your friend did seem troubled but acted so blazé as usual, masking his inner feelings like always and was slightly over enthusiastic about your trip. He'd gone away happy though, bags full of free food and genuinely excited for you, so you'd opted for the soft approach and pretended nothing was amiss.

Cold air brushed across warm cheeks, cooling you down with Earth's invigorating breaths and to be outside once again gave a sense of awakening, excursions rare and you turned to Levi, apology in your eyes. 

"Sorry we never got to visit the places on your list."

"It's alright, (F/N). Probably a case of rose tinted glasses anyway. Would've looked shit compared to what I remember in my mind." Holding you close, the man squeezed in tight until you were pressed into him, arm looped around his waist and face warmed by his thick coat as a small kiss was placed on your head, protective and pure. "And now you have such a wondrous experience to come. Get ready for a painful fucking existence." 

"I'm sure I'll survive. I can always video call the guys, live through their view like we did." Levi bristled, straightening slightly as he checked the departure board for directions and you felt the stiffening muscles within your embrace, features softening as you smiled. "But I won't. That's our thing." He relaxed a bit and you held back the giggle in your chest, thoroughly amused by his reaction. Your lover paid extreme attention to the glowing letters on screen and internally chastised himself for the flash of jealousy, yet wanting to keep the method of communication for the pair of you only, the show of emotion making you adore him that little bit more.

"There we go. Stop F." Silver eyes scanned the area and Levi tutted, spotting the relevant port with a sigh. "Would be right across the fucking station, wouldn't it. Fuck sakes." Embodying that masculine avoidance of asking for help, the man looped both suitcase handles in his arm and attempted to pull them along, propping you up on the other side but only achieving a stuttering sideways grind of plastic wheels - the luggage was not intended to be moved in this way. "Jesus, what did you pack?"

"Oh you know, the essentials. Shampoo, clothes, Eren."

"Fucking feels like you did."

Giving in with a brusque huff, he set you down on one case as a kind of throne and sought assistance, scowl deep and pace thunderous. You looked around, took in the busy terminus and kept the fear at bay, hands wringing tightly and telling yourself it would be ok, that kind of accident would not be happening again, the odds were too high and you weren't that unlucky. Probably. Maybe. 

Levi returned with an employee, friendly male wearing the royal blue uniform of this place and a gold watch stuck out from his waistcoat pocket, a true time-keeper if you'd ever seen one. The smile warmed you to the aging worker instantly and he scooped the chain out with an official swipe, flicking the lid and checking the hour despite all of the electronic displays. He nodded, content that you had enough of a chance to catch the intended bus and he glanced down at your seated form.

"I can get you a wheelchair, Miss?" 

Some explanation had evidently been given and you weakly raised a hand, waving kindly to dismiss the offer. 

"No thank you, I don't need one." 

The promise you'd made to yourself stood true and you rose carefully, strong arm grasped as the porter smiled again, taking the luggage easily across the concourse at a break neck speed. 

"Dunno why he's in such a hurry." Levi grumbled by your side, small steps taken and miles behind your assistant. "We've got plenty of time."

Humanity milled around, waiting for people or coaches, passing the minutes with chatter or by staring at their phones, faces lit up all around as messages and social media were consumed. Others rushed, the hiss of hydraulic doors denoting a vehicle was leaving without them and one particular racing individual crashed straight into you, gaze only on gate A and he gave a cry of shock, turning to see a murderous glare from steely orbs and a woman clinging to the dark clothed male. 

"S-sorry..." Still running, the guy spun and held up a palm, tie flapping in his self-created wind and he sped away, off to catch his transport for the evening.   
"I'll give him fucking sorry. Dick." Levi held you up with more vigour now, mood raging and he muttered deeply. "You ok, (F/N)?"

"Yea, fine. No damage done."

"Good. Sooner we're on that bus, the better." Memories of the rat race were stark in his mind and home seemed so far away, his previous life well and truly over and done with. If he never came back here, it would be too soon. That brought another consideration to the fore, your words from earlier ringing in his ears and he wondered how you'd adjust to rural living. You might hate it, crave to be back as a nameless person amongst many others. Or, as he hoped, you may take to it well, have neighbours you knew and attain a type of peace, no random strangers from the past propositioning you on the street. This was a conversation for later though, not one to be discussed yet and the correct alighting point was reached, your strained breaths telling of intense work. 

Luckily, the bus was already waiting and the worker loaded your cases, small carry-on bags shouldered by Levi and he slipped the man a bank note, thanks conveyed by a nod and you grinned instead, receiving one in return and a tip of his pristine hat. 

Your seats were at the very back, nestled away on their own as across the aisle sat a structure, one which housed refreshments that could be purchased en route by way of coins and some button pressing. It meant there may be some regular traffic coming your way, but judging by the sparse attendees, it was unlikely. Only four others made up your group, dotted around the coach and with departure time approaching, it seemed that this was it, six people ready to be ferried safely to their destinations. 

Coats off and stowed above, Levi settled you into the comfortable chair by the window, darkness falling outside to erase any chance of a view and you stretched, the almost luxurious amount of space relatively unheard of on public transport. After a short wait, the engine roared into life and a pale hand twined with yours, fingers linked and pressing tightly.

"Well, here we go (F/N). You ready for this?"

"More than ready, Levi."

Night journeys could be beautiful, the lights of towns and retail centres twinkling past as you flew by, orange and white glows breaking up the vast stretches of blackness like the stars had come down to illuminate your travels. Sprays of gold flashed against the windows as street lamps were left behind, tall metal poles towering high and sending their rays across the wet roads. You stared out, counted the space between each light and reckoned that they were becoming less frequent, main motorway turning into a smaller artery for traffic the further you got from the city.

At first the two of you had talked quietly, shared some of your pre-packed snacks and conversed about this and that, descriptions of those who would soon become your local acquaintances given and warnings made clear when needed - don't ever get chatting to this person, never accept food from that one, all good advice. You'd snoozed for about thirty minutes, used the time well and now sat watching the world go by, the man at your side drowsing lightly with a book on his lap. Levi's head was tilted back against the padded seat, face calm and lips twitching every now and again like a cat did mid-dream, a sight which made you want to squeal with adoration. 

Deciding to check in, you sent texts to both the friends back home, standard one for Jean and a more meaningful message for Eren - no details in case the other saw, but enough gravitas to suggest you were thinking of him and hoped they'd spoken. It seemed they had, promises given to talk during a more private time and you smiled, glancing round to see grey eyes opening, nap over.

"Hey."

"Hey. Shit, where are we?"

"Not a clue, Levi. I can't see a damn thing." 

He yawned, limbs extended to rid muscles of fatigue and then your lover looked out the window, passing scenery barely visible but when combined with the time, he was able to hazard a guess, the village's name stated and a small huff of certainty escaped his lips. 

"Only another hour, (F/N)." Leaning over, he kissed you with tenderness and drew back, a glint in his gaze that sparkled brilliantly. "I know what we can do." Careful fingers searched inside the small black bag and he brought out a bundle of papers, your own perfume radiating still from the pages even after so long and you smiled, recognising the handwriting as yours, back when it was much more coherent - your current penmanship needed work. The look on his face was mixed, partly joyous but it held sorrow too and you frowned. 

"What's wrong?"

"The last time I read these was when…you know. You were…asleep." Not much had been said about your coma since leaving hospital, concentration placed on recovery instead of dwelling and it had laid heavy on his heart, a dark knowledge and memory which he knew would need to be spoken out loud. "Did you really hear me?"

Flashbacks invaded your brain but not unkindly, words and a soft voice soothing you from slumber and bringing life once more. Gulping at the lump in your throat, you placed a hand on his and squeezed, the hardest effort ever made and your lips formed a small smile. 

"Yes Levi. What you were saying didn't make sense but I knew you were there, with me the whole time." You bit your tongue to avoid thanking him and shook your head, showing gratitude in a whole other way. "You're amazing, everything you've done, what we're doing. I…" Letting out a tiny laugh, you added the other palm to the slight embrace, as did he, clutching together as another sleepy town sped by and you found some bravery within, able to vocally express such emotions. "I love you." 

Levi bowed, gaze down and mouth curling into happiness and he nodded, raising the connected hands and kissing your knuckles - still incapable of forming the right sounds to reciprocate, the man settled for a physical show instead and sighed, breath hot on your wet skin as he pecked over and over, miniscule and feathery butterflies placed in swift succession. You giggled, feeling like a princess being greeted and a blush crept over your cheeks, heartier laughs offered as Levi moved up, arm now peppered with kisses and he wore a contented smirk on his face. 

"Stop! You're tickling me!" One of your fellow commuters turned, glaring at the two sitting up back and acting like school kids and the older woman tutted, causing you to erupt into unstoppable fits of chuckles. "Levi! I can't breathe!" Sides aching, you slumped down in the seat as lips bypassed the sleeves of your top, coming to attack your neck. Totally over sensitive and finding everything to be hilarious, you tried to fight it off but failed, gave in to weakness that thankfully came from laughter and not fatigue. 

Enjoying having you at his mercy, Levi reluctantly decided enough was enough; he didn't want to get thrown of the bus so close to home and he straightened, pulling you upright and stroking (h/c) back kindly, loving your adorable change in colour. He could quite happily sit here all day, staring into your eyes and soaking up the glow that surrounded you and he tapped your nose, dragging himself away and holding up the letters. 

"Shall we?"

"Hang on." Catching air, you gave a few last chortles and rustled through your bag, Levi's missives produced and he actually seemed speechless, jaw slack and stare wider than usual. 

"I didn't…you…you kept them?"

"Of course I did. I will forever."

Spending the remainder of your trip well, the pair of you read through each note together, pressed against one another and alternating between laughs and moments of embarrassment, reliving the conversations which all started with one misdirected envelope. It was warming to experience a discussion that in reality had spanned many weeks, your first courier recalled and once the letters were finished, you moved on to chat about the time spent virtually, reminiscing and growing closer by the minute. 

This journey's end was reached almost exactly an hour since Levi's estimate was made, mumbles of disapproval coming from the chastising traveller and you were helped down the deep stairs by powerful arms, luggage unloaded too and you found yourselves in a small shelter, a place with two stops, a vending machine and little else. 

"Welcome to the sticks, (F/N)." You couldn't see your surroundings very well, a few darkened buildings present and the large coach pulled away, leaving you to wait for a connection. "Shouldn't be long." Sitting on the cases, you swapped ridiculous suggestions on how to improve the tiny shack, silly ideas like a pool table, fully stocked bar and an open fire, joking around to keep occupied. 

Levi had been right and the shaky looking bus pulled up, driver waving down through the open doors. 

"Hey Levi! We've been expecting you! And (F/N), nice to meet you!"

"Oh…um, hi! You too…"

"Bob." The man by your side had whispered the right name and you grinned, using it in place of silence and you were led onto the final vehicle, set on a less comfortable seat as your lover fetched the luggage, pulling the heavy items in with a growl. 

"Fucking weather." 

The rain had just begun again, adding to existing puddles and it hammered against your metal chariot to create a thunderous wall of sound. There were no other passengers, just the returning local and his apparently well known woman, leaving you to wonder if this ride had been especially laid on. 

Your last trek was eventful, the driver regaling you with tales of Levi's existence - the time the worker's wife had baked an upside down cake which the pale man ate in one sitting, his ability to fix almost anything, a grumpy neighbour that was evidently adored by all around. The one by your side griped and grumbled the whole way, secretly enjoying sharing his life with you and he hid the smile well, watching your face light up as you chatted energetically despite the long haul and late hour. He stroked at your back without realising, keeping contact and you leant into the gesture, safe in his company and completely at ease. 

"Here we are! Now you love birds be careful, it's slippery out there." You'd pulled up, destination reached and the doors creaked open, wet sprays flying in and driver continuing his farewell. "I've got to take her to the depot, see you soon!" 

Once everything was off, you stepped down gingerly to be met by a wonderful scene, huge male enveloping a smaller form with one arm whilst the other held up a massive umbrella, big enough for all three of you. Levi was smothered against Mike's chest, friendly and masculine hug in force and you waved to the driver, switching the hold on his bus to grab out at your man for support. It was an ill orchestrated manoeuvre, feet stumbling and you squeaked, tall blonde reacting in a split second and scooping you up before you had a chance to fall. 

Face full of man, you tried to thank him and received a sniff to your hair, hum coming in response and you laughed, squeezing back into the person you'd never met but knew so well. 

"Come on, it's fucking pissing down and my shoes are getting wet."

Taking you from Mike, Levi grabbed a handle also and nodded to the other case, giant and friendly human doing as requested whilst sheltering you all from the downpour. 

"I got some bits and pieces in for you, the essentials. Milk, bread, strong vodka."

"Vodka?"

"Levi, we both know (F/N) needs a drink after six hours trapped alone with you." 

The reply was an elbow to the ribs and a grunt of disapproval, smiles shared between you and the other man. Being pitch black out and well past midnight, you couldn't see much but the sounds and smells were incredible - fresh salty air and the crashing of waves, pure atmosphere temporarily lifting any feelings of tiredness which had lingered in your bones and you closed your eyes, soaking in the coastal town which you couldn't wait to view come morning, rain or not. 

A house was reached, one you were familiar with and Mike gave his speedy farewells, keen to get back indoors himself and he placed a quick kiss on your cheek, one for Levi too before he sped away laughing, feet splashing through puddles.

"Fucking freak. Ok." Sighing, the dark haired male opened up and helped you in, storm shut away and home entered. His friend had turned the heating and a couple of small lamps on, warm abode making for a cosy scene and the man next to you smiled, grateful for Mike's efforts despite his grumbles. "We can unpack later. I can't be assed now."

"Good plan, Levi." 

Coats and footwear removed, you both flopped down onto the couch, lazy hug in progress as the effects of a long journey began to manifest, hot living area making you sleepy and content. 

"So. We're here, (F/N)."

"Yes we are. It's even nicer in person." 

"Thanks." Levi sighed again, happy to be home and able to enjoy it with you finally, fingers linked with yours and soul at peace. "Tomorrow we start walks. Uphill, on the beach, round the town. It's one thing going around the house. We need to work on rough terrain."

"Have you been planning a regime? I bet you've got a timetable and everything."

Playful grey eyes met yours and you smirked, cuddling in and letting out a slow breath of comfort. 

"Of course I fucking have. Wait until you see what I have planned for the evening, (F/N)."


	20. Day Out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, it's been so long posting for me but I have some nice fluff here for you hopefully :)

A mixture of strange things greeted you upon waking - usually they wouldn't be odd, but disorientation kicked in the moment you opened your eyes and it took some time to adjust and recall exactly where you were. The sound of waves was soothing yet unexpected, the scent of freshness combined with breakfast also well received however it made no sense, none of these things should be here, not in your apartment. And then there was the vacant space beside you, one usually occupied by another body and you patted the sheets, stupidly searching an empty bed for Levi as if he'd simply become lost in the covers. 

Pictures lay foggy in your mind, brain trying to cope with the change of scenery and figure out how you got here; it felt alarming to be so confused after all this time, any incidents of misplaced judgement a bygone and you began to panic. Dull light illuminated the scene, speaking of either an early morning or bleak outlook and you turned to check the time, seeing not your digital red display but an old fashioned analogue alarm clock, antique-looking and round. Two brass circles sat atop the item, ready to be rattled when the prescribed hour was reached and you frowned at it, unfamiliar face staring back and ticking quietly. 

You knew Levi lived by the coast and presumed that's where you were, but couldn't fathom how. For some reason, your whole journey had been erased as the last thing you could clearly recollect was crying over a jar. Closing your eyes again, you swallowed down the creeping dread and tried to connect the dots, paint a picture that would bring this all back to normal and explain your whereabouts. You searched the depths of your mind, struggled and prayed to find just one single piece of evidence, anything to ease the disorientation that made the world spin in sickening colours behind your lids. Measured breaths were taken, shaking air blown out between parted lips and you dredged the memory banks, seeking out a singular truth. 

Not much was attained at first but a flicker of hope broke through, a random image that kind of helped - lights playing off droplets of rain on glass, moving source of brightness creating a spray of delicate little globes and you suddenly sat up, convinced you'd cracked the code. 

"The bus." 

Now that had been discovered, a flood gate opened and it all came tumbling through, your whole trip, not every last bit but some parts shone out down to the finest details like how the coach smelled, felt, sounded...

"Morning." Levi appeared holding a tray, one loaded with food and a steaming pot of tea, the aroma telling you it was going to be a magnificent breakfast and he frowned lightly, the wideness in your gaze troubling. He expected this may happen, a lapse in knowledge of your location and the feast was placed down carefully, man joining you under the fluffy duvet and arranging the edible treats with a gentle hand. Pouring drinks, silver eyes kept a close watch as you shook your head, fuzziness chased away physically. "Got everything?"

"I think so, Levi. Shit, that was weird."

"Well, remove familiar settings…" Your lover didn't know what else to say and opted to keep quiet on the subject, allow you to process this - any questions could be asked. "Here." Hot liquid was passed over and you took it gingerly, warmth spreading from your palms as you cradled the mug, thoughtful and creating a more vivid picture.

"Did we meet Mike?"

"We did."

"He's huge, right?"

"Fucking massive."

"Ok, I remember him." Sipping delicately, you smiled, content that enough had been stored internally. "Thanks Levi. I guess you're right about familiar settings."

"Of course I am. Now eat, you need your strength." He smirked, playful elbow dug into your arm and you grinned back, excited for the day ahead. 

~~~~~~

Needing your strength had been no joke, village traversed side to side, up and down, Levi's childhood home viewed and the effort was beginning to show, arms trembling as you ascended once more on an uneven path, walking sticks in hand. For some reason your lover had a collection of the things, kind of like your umbrellas but from appreciation of the carved wooden poles rather than an absent memory and you clutched a dark mahogany one in your left grip, lighter and ornately decorated item in the right. It certainly helped, allowed you to use the upper muscles to aid weaker legs and despite the mis-matched colouring and height, the sticks looked much better than hospital issue crutches. 

Panting, you reached a kind of summit, trees lining the crest of the town in a circular display as if crowding around the grassy peak, a perfect picnic spot had it been less wet. Luckily there was a bench too and you eyeballed it, intent on making this your goal and dreaming of flopping down onto drenched wood regardless of potentially soaking your jeans. 

"That's it (F/N), aim for the bench."

"I…fucking…am…" Speaking with a strained voice, you grit your teeth and ignored the rising obscenities you wanted to throw in his direction, knew he was only trying to get you back on track however to see him strolling along, hands in pockets while you dragged yourself upwards became infuriating and the acidic words spilled out to punctuate each trembling step you took. "It's alright for you Levi, you don't…don't have to fucking…wonder when you're gonna fall flat on your face…or when you're shitty legs will give way…fuck this shit…" Pushing on anyway, you gave a final burst and made contact with the sodden seat, ass undoubtedly wet and lungs burning as ferociously as your eyes. 

Grey and soft ones shone back, pride and a sense of fun in his gaze and Levi carefully lowered himself down, making sure his coat acted as a barrier and he looked over, smirk playing on his lips. 

"Go on." He sensed the impending wrath and enjoyed the passionate scowl on your face, saw reddened cheeks and the glow of hard work that played across your skin, all of which attracting him to you even further. Surely the next and wholly invited outburst would be amazing too. 

"Well Levi…" You gasped for air, walking aids tossed down and biceps protesting. "Fuck you. That was like climbing a goddamn mountain for me and look at you all calm and not fucking sweating." Pausing for oxygen, you wiped your brow. "And now I have to sit in a fucking puddle." 

"At least it stopped raining?" 

You shot him a glare, the epitome of smug staring right back and he held up a palm as if to suggest the lack of a downpour made this any better. 

"I…you…oh fuck. I can't even reply to that! Revenge, Levi. Just you wait. I'll strike when you least expec…"

His lips halted your tirade, gentle and warm as you instantly relinquished any anger, knew the gripes were unfounded as Levi had just pushed you to new heights, drove you forwards as he knew you were capable. Your lover drew back, head tilting to one side and small smile saying you should look. The scene which met your gaze was incredible, one missed until now and you gaped, whole bay laid out before you and the still squally ocean beating against the shore, lapping around docks and stretching away as far as the eye could see. 

"I…oh…" 

"Nice, isn't it (F/N)?"

"It's beautiful."

He bit back the need to make a soppy comment about how your beauty was greater, chided himself at even thinking such a ridiculously romantic set of words and opted instead to reach for the fabric bag he'd brought, flask revealed and two plastic cups of tea poured - such a blustery day required warmth. Staring out, you both sipped on drinks and absorbed the vista, one which never grew old to the man and was fast becoming a favourite of yours, dark clouds making the view no less impressive. 

Serenity was disturbed by a buzz and you snatched at your pocket, apologetic face dismissed by the flick of a wrist and one word. 

"Eren?"

"Yea, sorry. I have to take this."

"Have they fucking made up yet?"

"I think so, let's find out...hey Eren!"

Levi watched your animated conversation, saw the precise moment that the reconciliation must have been described and he admired the genuine glee on your features as the conversation continued, only one side audible to him. Your heart soared to hear how they'd spoken things through, acted with maturity and come to a pleasant conclusion. 

"So Jean did get offered a new job!"

"Yea (F/N), he was scared that it'd upset me!"

"Aw that's adorable! Did he take it, Eren?"

"Shit yes, I made him! Sure, it means I have to deal with a new person and I don't get to grope my boyfriend all day long, but…I'm so proud of him."

"Listen to you, all grown up."

"Yea thanks (F/N). But seriously, it's gonna be weird at first. How am I supposed to train someone?"

"Do you need me to come back?"

Levi flinched yet stayed silent, aware that you meant it whole heartedly and hadn't offered assistance just to be nice. Of course he wanted you to stay, keep you in his protective orbit and be the rock which was needed, however he couldn't deny your personality and other ties. Listening to the end of the discussion, he relaxed a little as it became apparent that your assistance wasn't needed, physically at least - regular contact would be maintained now for reasons other than friendship. As you finished the call, rain began to make an appearance once more, soft and feathery droplets which seemed innocent enough but would soon be drenching you with ease. 

"Fuck. Come on (F/N). Nearest point of safety is the pub. You ready for mid afternoon drinkers who have nothing better to do than nurse a beer and ramble incessantly?"

"Bring it on, Levi." 

Downwards travel was easier in the sense that momentum helped you onwards, although it wasn't without it's traps, speed increasing without your say so and your feet struggled to keep up with the rest of you, body tilted and walking sticks working at an alarming pace. Wet grass became your enemy also, slippery surface of no help and you started to lose it, energy sapped and arms tight with strain. You gave a cry of alarm, sliding sideways and flapping limbs as if able to fly your way out of this…if you'd have witnessed Levi's icy accident outside the hospital, then your own fall would've been an almost mirror image of the occasion, footing erratic and useless. 

"Ah fuck!" Succumbing to gravity, you hit the sodden earth ass first, continuing the journey for a few meters as the ground acted like a water slide, sending you closer to the destination in an un-ladylike and messy way. Once you came to rest by a dark grey boulder, it was possible to look round, see where the other adventurer had gone - he had not fared any better than you, it seemed. Levi was sprawled out like a star, huff of annoyance starkly audible over the now harsh rain shower and you couldn't help but laugh, pure hilarity a sound which the man was sure he'd remember for the rest of his days. 

He made the rather precarious journey over to where you lay still incapacitated by giggles, both of you wet, muddy and decidedly bedraggled looking and Levi gave up, sat back down beside you and embraced the fact that his jeans were already filthy. 

"Nothing like the great outdoors, (F/N)." A small smile cracked across previously scowling features as you shared a water-logged hug, nuzzling into one another's necks to keep warm and using breaths to heat up cold noses. Harder droplets fell and time was called, your lover helping you to unsteady feet and he checked the terrain, muttering to himself. "No…no that's not going to fucking work…shit…" Sizing up the predicament, he nodded and crouched with his back to you, making sure you were propped against the rock. "Get on."

"What?"

"Get on, (F/N). It's the only way."

"Ummm…ok then." Flopping forwards, you landed on Levi and wrapped your arms around his shoulders, thighs up and they were grabbed tightly, weight burdened easily. "What about the sticks?"

"Fuck…let me get them…"

Grunting and bending, your lover scooped then up along with his bag, belongings gathered and slightly awkward journey under way. Due to the declining nature of the hill, each step he took was swift and soon you were galloping down, small yet speedy paces jolting and jarring and the very real prospect of another tumble grew into imminent danger. 

"Be careful Levi!"

"Stop fucking strangling me, we're nearly there…"

Nearly sprinting now, the pair of you ran towards the road and desired safety, your grip bordering on choking and you closed your eyes, not wanting to witness the certain incoming fall. Movement suddenly changed, uncontrolled descent morphing into steady strides and sharp intakes of air and you chanced a look, peeking out from behind his wet ebony hair to see the level ground of a flat stone walkway. 

"We made it!"

"Did you ever doubt me (F/N)?" He panted the words out, dropping you down and regaining composure as you held his arm for support, just one stick passed over. "Use me on this side." Making no arguments, you did as commanded and took the assistance gladly, tormented ocean booming in your ears as the pub was reached, entrance and introduction to your temporary neighbours not how you'd imagined. 

Eight aging faces turned to greet the sight that stood before them, two people soaked through and smeared with mud and grass stains, one clinging to the other and eyeing up the comfortable looking chairs as if they were manna from heaven. Hands were raised, friendly smiles given and you grinned back, embarrassed but in dire need of a seat. Levi nodded and caught the attention of the landlord, motioning with a palm to query where to sit. 

"Anywhere you like, but you're paying the cleaning bill." Some chuckles met the answer and a curt reply came forth. 

"I can fucking stomach that." Slow progress was made to a table by an open fire, your bones thankful for the flaming heat source and coats were hung on a stand, joining some others to dry off. As you eased into the high backed chair, every fibre of your being praised the god of upholstery and padding and Levi pointed to the bar, water drip hanging from the tip of his nose as he ran a hand though dark, saturated locks. "What can I get you?"

"Not sure Levi. What are you having?"

"Whiskey. I'm fucking freezing."

"Make that two." 

As the appropriate transaction and pouring commenced, one of the locals approached the shorter male, conversation hushed but you overheard it, older man almost apologetic. 

"Sorry to bother you Levi, I know there's a lot going on but the guttering's blocked again and with all this rain…"

"I'll sort it tomorrow."

"Oh would you? I hate to ask."

"Don't be such an idiot. Of course I will." Levi looked directly at the cash register, fixed his stare on anything but the person speaking to maintain an air of indifference however one gesture almost turned you to a pile of useless mush - a pale hand clasped around the larger one that rested on the counter, tiny squeeze applied and silver eyes glanced sideways, emotion portrayed by that look alone and the man asking for help beamed from ear to ear. 

"Good to have you back, Levi."

"Good to be back." You were barely able to hear him yet it existed, the honest truth delivered in a mumble which spoke of how difficult it must have been to be away from his home for so long. Two drinks were placed on the table and you gazed up, expression open and kind as Levi sat. 

"You really love it here, don't you?"

"Hmm?" He sipped and crossed his legs, settling back into plush cushions and letting orange fire warm his body. "It's ok I suppose. It'll do." A glint in steely orbs told you everything needed and you leant in, taking his hand like he had done with his friend. Nothing more was discussed, enough said already and you relaxed together, soaking up the idyllic setting and enjoying one another's company. 

Close to drifting off, you felt aches and pains wash away, momentous hike causing a satisfied glow which you were sure people could see, purple and pink strands filling your vision in kindly waves, pure exhaustion the only thing that brought this on now - you missed it somewhat, a visual manifestation of thoughts and a physical condition reserved for just the most fatigued of moments and you allowed the hues to engulf clarity, bathe you in their soft and fuzzy aura and your lids dropped, whole body nicely contented along with a calm mind.

All of that came to an abrupt end, your snooze and Levi's quiet adoration smashed to pieces as a large figure loomed close by, hands placed heavily on both of your shoulders and voice booming.

"Coming to the quiz tonight?"

"Eh? What fucking quiz, Mike?"

"There's signs everywhere. Forgotten your glasses again, Levi?" 

"I'm not blind you know. Now, what quiz?"

The blonde joined you, form almost blocking out the flame's heat as he sat, wooden chair forcing a creak of fear at the new addition and Mike grinned, intent on dragging you two along. 

"Small teams, no more than five. Cash prize, general knowledge, pop culture, that kind of stuff."

"Pop culture?"

"Yea, like what sort of things the kids are into nowadays."

"Jesus Mike, this place has fucking aged you."

Now able to fathom what was going on, the last puffs of vivid colour leaving the room, you straightened a bit and smiled. 

"It could be fun?" Not much like this happened back in the city, inhabitants happy to do their own thing and refrain from fraternising with anyone else so a pub quiz actually sounded like a great idea, a good way to meet people and have some deserved frivolity. Levi eyed you with suspicion, convinced that some prior scheme had been put in place to rope him into it and he sighed, saw the expectant glimmer in your stare and knew he couldn't ever deny it - after all, you'd worked fucking hard today. 

"Alright. But the minute they want us to do any kind of singing or some shit, I'm out." 

Plans made, you bade your farewells and carefully hobbled back to Levi's home, ready to take a power nap, eat and refresh before what would undoubtedly be an amusing night.


	21. Tranquility

Somewhere between returning back earlier and succumbing to fatigue, you'd managed to convince Levi that having Eren and Jean join your quiz team via wifi was a good idea, using Mike's statement of five per group as a selling point - your lover had been hesitant due to how the last time you all 'went out' together ended, a morning of regretful pain and hungover illness. Regardless, you'd won and messaged your friends, both using this as an excuse to celebrate the taller of the pair's new job and a chance to let their hair down after days of stress and hidden anxiety. 

As you woke to the dim early evening sunset, grumbling muscles didn't even cause concern because right now, the feeling of warmth and comfort outweighed any aching residue. Cuddled up in the toasty duvet, you felt Levi's body pressed into your back, the loose arm over your waist and steady breaths tickled serenely at your neck, everything about this moment adding up to becoming perfect. Unbeknownst to you, he was in fact awake and staring at the back of your head, noting each little twitch that brought you out of what was around two hours of sleep, paying attention to every movement and memorizing the whole thing. This here was exactly where he belonged, the man mused, curled against you and sharing peaceful bliss. 

As you turned, the expected view of a slumbering Levi didn't materialise and you smiled, met by a similar yet smaller expression and a pale hand brushed your hair to one side, grey eyes taking in your upper body and the way his white tee made you look ten times more adorable - wet clothing had been discarded earlier, replaced by older garments and dry underwear for your nap. 

"Welcome back. Sweet dreams, (F/N)?"

"Busy dreams."

"I know. You kept fucking kicking me."

"No I didn't!" 

"The bruises on my shins beg to differ." 

His retaliation was instant, palms on your form and lips melded to yours, hot embrace close and tinged with urgency. The lingering buzz of hard work left your bones to be replaced with passion as his touch travelled up your spine, circling and massaging and you were scooped into Levi's arms, own limbs enveloping him as hungry tongues worked together in a show more apt for two people who had been flirting for hours. You pulled back, saw the lust in silver pools and smirked, facing one another on your sides. 

"I presume you had horny dreams then, Levi?"

"I find myself constantly turned on in your presence. Problem?" 

Tiny but powerful kisses ensued, your reply mumbled against his soft pout. 

"No…no problem..mmm."

There was no turning back, fires lit within you both and deft hands pulled the shirt from your torso, own blue one removed to leave only panties and boxers, the remaining items dealt with just as swiftly. Joined again in a second, you felt a burst of energy enter your soul and acted with as much force as Levi did, surprising him somewhat. In all of the times spent in such acts, he'd maintained a gentle air, took control to account for a lack of strength, however something seemed to have changed, or at least been awakened. 

"(F/N)…what…" You pushed forwards, sending him to his back and lying on top, thighs much more able than calves and you took advantage, biting at your man's lower lip and teasing below with a slight grind of the hips. Wider orbs stared up, air was expelled in wonder and you grinned, distantly still aware of your limits. 

"Levi, sit up." He didn't need to be instructed twice, shuffling to lay against the headboard and taking you with him, upright and gazing in the same slightly astonished way. You tilted your head, playful stare meeting a flashing one and voice low. "What? Didn't think I had it in me, huh?"

"You'll have something in you, (F/N)." 

Laughing at the awful yet arousing purred line, you wrapped your arms around muscular shoulders and raised a brow. 

"Is that a promise?"

"Fucking right, it is."

One hand grasped your ass tightly, the event calling for a little rougher action and Levi took his already full erection in the other grip, ready to make good on his oath. Before he did, a questioning but needy look was given, man craving the sensation of having you take the lead however that sense of protection still ran through him. You saw the combination and nearly burst with adoration, still unsure how you'd been so lucky to find someone this thoughtful, caring, passionate and incredible, gentle smile telling him all he needed to know. Letting you dictate speed, Levi positioned himself and you lowered down slowly, loud sighs of satisfaction turning to moans as a steady yet effective pace began. 

Fingers dug into your flesh, palms now at your hips to aid with your partner's upwards movements and you laid your forehead on his, eyes half-lidded and connected with a mercury gaze, two humans caught up in nothing but each other. Any of your past was erased, trials and hardships deleted to be written over with new data, information which consisted of one man alone, a person who could make everything change in a split second. Levi felt the way you squeezed against his legs with yours, noted the power and found himself drowning within you, at a loss to imagine a time when you didn't exist in his life - once a collection of words on paper, now a real tangible woman who could take his world and create a new one, seemingly with ease. 

"Jesus (F/N)…"

Your loose hugging grasp on his shoulders tightened, needing the sensation of being able to show Levi how much he meant to you by physical expression and untapped energy surfaced, each thrusting roll of your body containing an intensity that drove you onwards, the pair of you breathing deeply in unison and giving into extreme pleasure.

"Levi…oh shit…"

No words were available to either of you for a while, just a series of groans and gasps which merged into one, eyes still locked and mouths slack as warm figures slid together, showing love and care to one another. Clutching at raven locks, you felt the approaching climax marching in, could sense Levi's own change as he tensed, the hold on your hips increasing and the most incredibly wrecked sound was pulled from his throat, onyx strands falling either side of a gorgeous face as he stared up at you with a kind of reverence, brain tuned into a singular truth - here and now was all that mattered. 

"(F/N)…fuck (F/N)…"

Swiftly losing coherence, he managed a breathy and shaking noise and pushed up strongly, causing you to let out a cry of elation which lit his flesh on fire, the way you moved hypnotising him from his peripheral vision and he watched with hunger as your expression merged into one of pure joy and release. 

"Ahhh Levi yes! Oh god yes!" 

Wholly at the mercy of sexual gratification, you called out and held Levi close, head back to expose your neck, a fact he took full advantage of. The sharp yet sensual pain applied by his mouth tipped you over the edge, brilliant pinkish shades filling your line of sight as you came, voice raw and wasted, permitting only squeaks of delight. The sudden and unexpected nature of this added to your excitement, skin prickling in waves of satiated lust and your lover drew back, observing desire embodied and relinquishing to his own orgasm, low tone rumbling in harmony as he let go. 

Weak however still electrified, you placed kiss after kiss on parted lips, palms on his delicate cheeks and he mirrored the stance, heartfelt embrace containing something of your fervour. You finally grew able to speak but said nothing, simply leant away and smiled gently, the warmest possible show of affection and Levi permitted a small laugh that sounded almost disbelieving and he cuddled you in tightly, face in your neck so his next words were muted. 

"I…I fucking love you, (F/N)." 

~~~~~~

It had taken quite some time for you to leave the bedroom, neither wanting to break the serenity at first but as it got later, you'd grudgingly risen to shower and find clean clothes for your evening out. Levi had placed a plastic stool in the bathroom for you to use, just like at home, a place which seemed to have been left behind years ago, not merely a day. After a slow walk using one stick and the dark haired man as props, the pub had been reached and you currently sat in your lover's casual one-armed hug, nestled in and totally contented. 

A swathe of locals had passed by to introduce themselves, most of the town in attendance as cash-prize quiz night drew in quite the crowd but now it was down to business, serious faces all around as the first question created a gentle buzz of thoughtful activity - team names. Jean and Eren were yet to join which left your trio to come up with an appropriate moniker for the night, quiet discussion held as if giving your choice away would somehow disadvantage you.

"No Mike, that's shit."

"What's wrong with "The Three Amigos?"

"For one, there's going to be five of us."

"Oh, right. Well Levi, you do better."

Silence descended as minds ticked over, the all important naming ritual probably taking more effort than any of the actual posers to come - when it came to reading the scores out, no one wanted to sound stupid. You scanned the room, open fire roaring just like earlier, many more bodies to keep toasty now though and everyone seemed immensely friendly, the odd smile or nod passed your way which you reciprocated with genuine kindness. Inspiration hit and you grabbed the pen and answer sheet, two words written as neatly as possible but the fatigue of a busy and energetic day was taking it's toll, heat and alcohol doing their bit to incapacitate you even further. Satisfied, you flopped back into Levi's waiting arm and grinned, tapping the paper with pride.

Mike said nothing and glanced nervously to his friend from behind a wall of hair, unsure on how to deal with this. Silver eyes took in your admittedly careful script, recalled how much care and attention you paid to it prior to the accident and he frowned - of course you were exhausted, it had been quite some walk earlier, however this had to be tackled head on now, not left for another time. Shining up from the white foolscap was something Levi understood and he made the decision to work on this further tomorrow. 

"Good name, (F/N). But you've done it again."

"Done what again?"

"Swapped the letters."

"Huh?" Upright, you glared at the page and failed to notice the issue, indignation cancelling out the truth. "It's fine. See?" 

"No, it's not. Look. And I mean properly look." 

You focussed, using every ounce of brain power left until the figures swam into real life, the extent of your tired mind now evident in the scrambled text; apparently, your team name was Eht Indtseruceiblts. 

"Oh…sorry." Why T and E were always switched, you had no idea, couldn't explain the odd phenomenon and a blush grew on your cheeks out of embarrassment in front of Mike. 

"Try again." Levi spoke quietly, hand on your back for moral support as he once again pushed your capacity mentally and asked for more. Luckily you took it as intended, saw this as help and not a way to annoy, pen once more held to paper and you scowled down, determined to crack through the sheet of fog and see things for what they really were. The others let you continue undisturbed, drinks sipped and a light conversation held in order to give you space and the melodic tune of Skype started to blare, a pale finger picking up the call and greeting the two other members of what was shaping up to be The Indestructibles. 

"Hey guys! Whatcha drinking?"

"No shots, Eren."

"Oh Levi, have some fun! We're celebrating!"

"It's all you two ever seem to do. Mike, sit the fuck down, I said no shots…bollocks."

The tall man's grinning departure to the bar was joined by your second attempt being shown to the screen, correctly spelt words now perfectly emblazoned on the sheet, congratulations given to your friend, praise which Jean took well as always. 

"Of course they wanted me, who wouldn't?"

"You'll be great, Jean."

"I know (F/N), I know. Ok, so when does this shit start?"

"Keep it down! Everyone can hear you!"

Giggling with the pair, you shot Levi a look and passed the paper over, allowing him to be quiz master as waiting for you to get the answers down would take all night. You chatted a while about the day so far, exaggerating your climb to the ones back in the city and a toast was made in honour of Jean's new employment, a flicker of disappointment crossing emerald discs momentarily but you saw the pride in Eren's face and knew he'd be happy for his partner. 

Proceedings soon became solemn, all eyes down and the questions came thick and fast, some on sports, others around 'pop culture' as Mike called it, whispered answers shared around the five of you before committing to a final decision. Levi's beautiful writing filled the page up in exact lines, never deviating from the prescribed boxes and you watched his hand moving deftly, gaining enjoyment from such a simple occurrence - it reminded you of all the times he'd done this to correspond with you, each note and skilfully crafted letter, all of which lay safely back at home. His home. Your home? Temporarily, yes. Chasing that trail of thought away, you concentrated on the man speaking to all those gathered, section on movies now in play and a particular poser had the room stumped. That was until Eren waded in. 

"I know! I know! It's Predator!" 

Mike glared at the small screen, Levi tutted and looked off to one side and you tried not to laugh, aware of everyone hurrying to write their answer down thanks to the shrieking disembodied voice which had provided clarity. Jean elbowed the brunette and grumbled darkly. 

"Great. Now the whole pub knows."

"Shit, sorry guys."

"Ok, Eren isn't allowed to fucking speak again." The pale man next to you faced the virtual pair, one brow raised as he delivered that last instruction, waiting to be begged for forgiveness, a plead that never came, guilty party instead accepting his punishment. 

Papers were eventually collected, the rest of the quiz passing without incident and Eren was let back into the circle, chattering away with animation as always - watching them made you feel a little homesick, not for the place but the people, but you knew this was the right decision, a haven to heal and recuperate in, one with so much more to be discovered. 

"…so I said to him 'if you think you're so clever, fix the printer your own damn self' and he fucking stuck his finger up at me!"

"I'm not surprised, Eren. You can't say shit like that the HR manager!"

"But he deserved it! Stupid bastard, they're all the same. They think the mail gets opened and scanned by fairies and their letters magically send themselves out of the door."

"That would be kind of cool."

"(F/N)! You hate them just as much as me."

"Hate is a strong word...maybe despise?"

Levi sat back and listened to your conversation, enjoyed the closeness you shared with others, the bond which created your ability to notice instantly when something needed to be discussed or let out in the open - it didn't just come from your time behind the bar of a strip club like you had suggested, no. This was born more from a kind and perceptive personality, one that formed your very core and made up the admirable and attractive individual that you were. He let you continue, happy to bask in what sounded like a true bitch-fest; he knew all about the 'us and them' of office politics. 

"But honestly, if we weren't there (F/N), the place would crumble down and that's no lie."

"Oh I know that Eren. Always have done. Problem is, none of them do. Maybe once Jean leaves you can go off sick? Show them how important you are?"

"Hey...that's a really good idea! Jean?"

The other participant had left your view once the questions ended, presumably on a toilet break and you finally noticed where they actually were. 

"Eren, are you in my apartment?"

"Umm…yea, yea we are. I came over to check the mail like you asked…"

"I only left last night!"

"…and there was this!" A pizza menu was flapped on screen and you rolled your eyes, nodding to let the explanation continue. "Anyway, we decided it might be nice to stay here for the quiz? Let you see home?" Silence settled in and you leant back, one lid half closed and arms crossed, the look which no one could remain steady under and Eren cracked like an egg. "Ok, ok. Your place is bigger and warmer and has more beer. Had. Had more beer. I'll get you some!"

"Listen Eren, I don't mind you being there. Just don't break any of the fixtures ok? I kind of want my deposit back one day."

"Me? Break stuff?"

"Anyway, where's Jean?"

"Do you have a plunger, (F/N)?"

"Oh that's gross, he's not blocked the toilet, has he?"

Levi gave a small laugh and looked up as Mike returned carrying more drinks, large form joining him again with a smirk.

"What's with the face, Levi?"

"I can't exactly get rid of it, can I."

"No. You're glowing."

"I'm not a fucking lamp, Mike." 

Leaving that with a chuckle, the light haired man slapped his friend on the back, well aware of how happy he was to have you here. 

In the end, your team had come second, losing out on the prize by two points - had it been one, Eren would no doubt have taken the blame for that. The virtual couple had signed off, promises given to leave your apartment neat and tidy before they went home and Mike stayed in the pub, a lively debate having started up around the merits of ride-on mowers and you currently found yourself speechless, standing on the shore line and watching the dark yet expressive sea spilling inwards with rolling waves, small amount of moon light giving an ghostly sheen to the rolling tide. The taste of salt water on your tongue made you feel alive, the forceful roar invigorating and you sighed, cuddling in with a fulfilled heart. 

"Thanks for all of this, Levi. It's perfect."

"I knew you'd like it." 

"I love it. So peaceful."

"Mmm. Just wait for tomorrow, (F/N)."

"What's tomorrow?"

Two sets of eyes gazed out across the ocean and he pointed, shadowy docks to your left jutting out grandly and standing their ground against the stormy onslaught. 

"Tomorrow you get to meet my co-workers." 

"See where all the magic happens?"

"See where I die inside a little bit more every fucking day." 

Levi turned, taking you with him to make the short journey home to a warm fire and warmer night caps, energy sapped and bed sounding like a great option. His grumble had again been half-assed but something still gnawed at him, an eventuality which was polarised by his place of employment - five weeks. That was all you had before having to return to your respective jobs and already he knew it would never be enough time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks everyone for reading, hope you enjoyed the latest chapter :)


	22. Comprehension

There was something to be said for the healing properties of coastal air, a natural phenomenon which bolstered the mind and fed the soul, a cleanliness that permeated one's bones and caused an increased level of energy, boosting the appetite to match. Your second morning here saw your second cooked breakfast, one which you wolfed down with little regard for chewing, stomach seemingly insatiable and constantly hungry. Glancing up from your position at the breakfast bar, you watched Levi loading dirty plates into the dishwasher, fully aware of the physique that lay beneath his dark woollen sweater and you voiced your thoughts out loud. 

"How are you in such good shape?"

"Hmm?"

"What's the secret, Levi?" 

He straightened, spoon in hand which was waved over to you as he spoke. 

"No secret, just hard work. Work I haven't done in fucking weeks actually. You're making me chubby."

"Chubby?! Holy shit…how are you even remotely chubby?"

"I can feel it. Getting love handles." He hid a smirk and turned, cutlery stowed in the basket ready to be cleaned and he grumbled loudly. "That's your plan, isn't it? You're a feeder."

"What? How did…when have I…?"

Incredulous, you grinned nevertheless and shook your head at the hypocrisy, another hearty meal having just been devoured thanks to his culinary skills. It wasn't lost on Levi either, an intentional jibe actually and he looked across at your smile, enjoyed the happiness and glow about you which appeared to have grown more radiant since coming here; the atmosphere could be the simple reason alone, however he hoped it also had something to do with being able to relax and recuperate with him in a different environment. Changing subjects, he wiped his hands on a cloth and nodded once. 

"Right. I have to sort that broken gutter down the road, you have to practise." The promise to assist a neighbour hadn't been forgotten and you felt a warmth which came from admiration, chest kind of tight in a ticklish churning sensation, one which made you squirm a little to dissipate the feeling as a note pad and pen were presented, items placed on the couch. Levi offered a hand, helping you off the stool and transporting you carefully past furniture until the seat was reached, pale finger pointing. "Write. I don't care what it is, a song, your shopping list. Anything. All it has to do is make sense." 

"You got it, boss." 

"Good." He bowed, lips planting a gentle kiss on yours and a soft hand stroked your cheek slowly, mouths parted after a few long seconds. "I'll be back soon. Don't get in fucking trouble."

"With a pen and paper? Doubtful."

"Your pen and paper got you stuck with a grumpy ass bastard. Just remember that, (F/N)." 

"I'll never forget that."

A moment of electricity passed between the two of you, not lustful or filthy, purely contented acknowledgement and he gave a one sided smile, face twitching up in an adorable almost feline expression and he moved to get a coat and boots, outerwear chosen to protect against the elements. At least it had stopped raining, he thought whilst pulling up the zipper to his chin and he paused before leaving. 

"Won't be long. Now get working on that paper."

You waved him off with a thumbs up on the other hand and sighed, door clicking shut and leaving you alone in the now quiet home, only sounds being the tick of a clock and churning water from the washer. 

Only forty five minutes had passed and Levi returned, nose red and hands a matching shade, shivers shaking his whole body as coldness ran through his veins, breath still visible before he closed the entrance on what could only be described as a fucking freezing day. 

"I was going to take you up the hill again (F/N) but fuck that. Straight to work, no deviations."

His voice was trembling, teeth rattling as chills overcame Levi's form and you felt useless, unable to do as desired and rush over to help him out of the damp coat, one saturated by a sea mist which was evident from through the window. Had you been capable, a hot drink could've awaited his arrival, warm clean clothes and a hug but here you sat, struggling to get up and not currently in possession of your sticks. Not one for self pity and sulking, you instead steadied your jaw and ignored the loathing within, knowing it wasn't your fault yet still hating the futility of it all. 

"Come here Levi." He did as requested, boots discarded on the floor and shaking body crashing down beside you, raw exposed skin ravaged by the wintry weather and you used what faculties you did have well, making the most of a shitty situation. Rubbing at pink hands, you tried to imbue life and warmth, transfer some of your heat onto him as swift yet gentle strokes were applied. "You're like ice."

"You try sticking your hands in cold water for half an hour. Fuck."

"Did you clear it?"

"Yea, goddamn leaves blocked the pipes up." 

Despite his obvious discomfort and trembles, it remained evident that if he was asked to do it again tomorrow, he would without question. 

~~~~~~

The docks were less imposing without the gunmetal grey ocean smashing into the sides, seemed smaller in day light too and you caught a glimpse of a ship on the horizon, wondering how such a vessel would be able to fit in what was actually a rather modest arrangement. This was clearly a quaint town with quaint amenities to match, all of the village's livelihood coming from one place alone - right here. Floodlights stood sentry, dormant bulbs awaiting a darker time of day and their metal structures swayed in the wind, strange creaking noise sounding like a lost soul trying to find their way home. In all, it could have been a rather bleak and fearsome place, multitudes of the lifeless containers piled up and a lack of any natural growth or plant life, however to you it was simply another slice of Levi to be savoured, a glimpse into his existence which filled you with nothing but excitement. 

The man on temporary leave complained under his breath the whole time, muttered about how his desk was most likely beneath a ton of paperwork, how desolate it was in the caverns of the building, how he hated the very sight of the edifice. You smiled, limping along with one stick alone, trying out independence to a degree and avoiding puddles, shimmering pools not something you wanted to encounter.

Upon entering, the entire office crowded around as if you were a rare gem, the rosetta stone come to visit a certain location, a way to interpret the person by your side. Comments were made, hands heavily clapped on Levi's shoulders as a myriad of words met your ears.

"...don't know how you handle him…"

"…such a sour face but he means well…"

"…must have the patience of a saint…"

Your lover scowled from underneath thin brows as his body was subjected to yet more back slaps and hand shakes, figure flinching from each hearty show of friendship. You held in a laugh at his discomfort and shrugged lightly, putting it all down to the fact that he'd been sorely missed and you were led away, gathered men admonished lowly. 

"Fuck the lot of you. I don't know why I put up with this shit."

"Because you love us, Levi!"

Mike's shouted addition was met by the middle finger held aloft and their colleagues applauded, not one of them failing to see the small smile on Levi's lips which told the workers that they'd been missed too. The stairs down were troublesome but you'd been practising at your partner's home, a sideways journey made with care and precision that ended at a sturdy wooden door, entrance thrown open dramatically as the man by your side grimaced with one eye shut, ready to face the heap of shit that undoubtedly awaited. 

"Oh." His one word said it all, neat and tidy work space certainly not the expected sight and you were pointed to a chair, taking the small leather seat gratefully with a huff. Levi sat opposite, bouncing a few times to ensure his bulky friend hadn't totally annihilated the hydraulics and he leant forward over his desk, sweeping hand delicate and lithe as it cut through the air. "So this is it. Much better than I'd feared. Mike must have actually listened for once."

A gleaming letter opener sat to one side, polished incredibly thoroughly and lying exactly in line with the green leather inlay on the dark wooden surface. Trays were empty and devoid of left over papers, leaving only today's mail stacked in a tiny pile and pale fingers lifted the blade, male waving it casually as he relaxed back into his well worn chair. 

"I'll get on with this, you can do the books (F/N)."

"Show me how, I'm all up for that." 

It felt good to be working again, even if just in a small capacity - it gave you a use and purpose unseen for some time. As Levi searched through a drawer you looked around, taking in the room which was the scene of so many interactions between the two of you. The lack of natural light made it seem cosier, if a little shut off and the manly scent you knew well permeated every inch of the small space, hung like a comforting cloud which mixed with the faint aroma of cigars. Pens were stacked in a pot, all metal and shiny, perfectly maintained and you smiled, wondering which one scripted all those letters. 

A thick book was presented and glasses retrieved from a pocket, lined pages inset with carbon paper to imprint through three layers, a kind of log presumably. Levi walked round to stand behind you, arms resting on your shoulders and chin on your head. 

"All these need to be matched to the shipping manifests. Ticked off." He drew a digit lazily across a line and tapped. "Add in the numbers here." You knew he was still putting you through training, making out like you were doing him a favour by catching up with the mundane task and you gripped his hand tight, squeezing to convey thanks. 

As envelopes were sliced deftly on this one-off day in the office, you enjoyed the quiet and serenity, chatting lightly about this and that whilst fulfilling your respective roles. Laughing over a story involving Mike and a large amount of misheard instructions, you picked up the next receipt and stared, eyes widening at the names emblazoned in dark ink. Levi noticed your gaping jaw and lack of activity, metal opener laid down carefully as he flicked a hand in your general direction. 

"(F/N)? Having issues?"

"Uhhh no, I think I just figured something out."

"How to read?"

The flashing silver discs you now locked onto spoke of playful banter and you took it as such, mirroring his earlier gesture upstairs and grinning widely. 

"Did you ever wonder how you sent me that letter by mistake, Levi?"

"What, other than my amazing skills in the art of fate?" He shrugged, staring to the right with a small huff and a frown. "I did wonder. Go on then. Explain."

You held the paper aloft, printed item useless without further information and the truth was delivered with a smile. 

"Your company imports my company's brochures but doesn't deliver them directly. Another logistics firm does. So…you get the shipment, couriers pick it up and bring it to me. You meant to bill them, not us." 

"Give me that." Levi took the flimsy invoice, checked it over and there it was in black and white - a careless error in choosing the incorrect address had led to this, a chance fuck-up which brought unbelievable happiness and a sense of belonging. The receipt was tossed down, forgotten amongst others and your lover rose, kneeling before you and looking up with the warmest of gazes, a hand holding yours where they lay on your lap, spectacles pushed up onto his head. "I have never made such a perfect mistake, (F/N)." 

Breathing became a foreign occurrence as you were unable to move, heart soaring at such a significant and loving statement and somehow you found the strength to press against his grip even tighter, fingers urgently curling into flesh like your very existence depended on the physical contact, a lump forming in your throat. Levi experienced the same sensation, a flood of emotions threatening to break his barrier of calm, uncaring stoicism and he swallowed hard, not sure exactly what to do next. He built up some courage and opened his mouth, still unaware of what was about to come out and he saw the wetness in (e/c) eyes, croaking a sound which lay somewhere between a word and a growl when another voice broke the spell. 

"Proposals already?"

Mike walked in unannounced, face mischievous as he surveyed the scene - his friend kneeling, your surprised expression and moist stare, the way you held onto one another for dear life…it was too good an opportunity to pass up and he grinned, watching Levi get to his feet in a rush as he smoothed his shirt down. 

"Fuck off, don't you know how to knock?"

"I'm the manager here, remember? I don't need to knock." 

The tall man circled round as his comrade flopped to the chair, confusion on usually bored features. Levi's brain was in pleasant turmoil, a melting pot of ungathered thoughts and ideas, all of which felt warm and fuzzy instead of despairing; had Mike not entered when he did, what would've happened? In honesty, he had no clue and that was ok - this kind of thing apparently struck those in love, he supposed. Griping without power, he glared at the newcomer but kept an eye on you, the same distant yet happy aura surrounding your form and he nearly missed Mike's suggestion. 

"I said, are you up for it tonight?" A deck of cards were presented, wiggled for effect and Levi realised how long it had been since the pair had played and caught up. "Well?"

"I…"

Your lover glanced apologetically over and you smiled, hand raised as the glow of the prior moment still coursed throughout your body, a cheeky response bubbling to the surface. 

"It's fine, honestly. You have wifi at home?" A nod confirmed what you already knew and you winked. "Well then, I know all the good porn sites so I'll be more than ok on my own." 

The two men didn't speak at first, Mike wondering if you were actually serious and Levi trying to concoct a swift and sufficient reply. 

"Fuck that, (F/N). Channel 658. That's all you need."

"Thanks, Levi."

Getting back to work, you both stifled smirks and let the blonde stand dumbfounded, made no effort to set him right and acted as if nothing had happened, all the while sending each other imaginary telepathic messages full of giggles and good natured enjoyment. 

~~~~~~

Once you'd been settled in Levi's home later on, he'd asked once more if you were ok with the evening out, a question which was dismissed instantly so now he sat opposite his old friend, whiskey and cigars on the go and cards in hand. They'd locked themselves in the basement as usual to keep any unwanted visitors at bay and spoke through the past few weeks - had the city changed much, how had things been in the office, you. 

That last subject arose again and Levi sighed, terrible selection of small playing cards tossed down and he threw back the dark liquid, empty glass carefully set to one side as his brow furrowed, deepest concerns about to manifest. Mike watched closely, stashed his own hand to concentrate on what was to come and he saw an internal struggle in force, companion troubled and failing to get out the correct feelings.

"Take your time, Levi."

"I just..I…fuck." Pouring more of the deep brown spirit, Levi sipped and gathered himself, chest tight and soul heavy. "What happens at the end? After five weeks is up? Does she just go fucking back? Do I go with her? Do I ask (F/N) to stay?"

"That is up to you, my friend. I can't give you the answers."

Instead of using a standard bitchy come back, the pale man looked directly into kind eyes, ones partially obscured by light hair, ones he trusted implicitly and the truth was delivered. 

"I can't lose her, Mike. I almost did once, never again." He downed the current glassful and grimaced, harsh liquor burning but Levi nonetheless topped the drink up again, filling Mike's also as he let out a small laugh, humour mixing with disbelief. "I don't know what I'm going to fucking do."

"Me neither, Levi. You'll figure it out."

"Will I? It took me three months to decide on what colour to paint my fucking living room." 

"This is different."

"Yea." He ran a hand through ebony locks and shook his head, game well and truly placed on hold as he tried to process the dilemma. "This is definitely different." 

An hour passed as you sat unaware of the conversation near by, curled up under a blanket with popcorn and wine, letters spread across the fluffy cover as you read through the missives again, sitcom in the background totally ignored and you heard the door click, Levi's cold figure entering with a shiver. 

"Finished already?"

"Yea, Mike ran out of money and there was no way I'd play for his collection of shitty DVDs." Covering up the reality, the home owner hung his coat on a hook and shuffled out of black shoes, joining you under the comfy blanket and gathering the pages into a pile. You leant into him, enjoyed the proximity and voiced your thoughts, face buried into a chest which smelt of your favourite aroma. 

"Do you miss it?"

"Miss what, (F/N)?"

"Writing. The excitement." 

You'd been having your own thinking session, mulling over whether Levi preferred the thrill of the chase and generally doubting yourself for no real reason other than human nature - did he regret becoming stuck with an invalid? Someone who needed constant albeit decreasing care? There was a lot to blame on spending time alone, the mind picking out insecurities with ease and the man's reaction was instant, almost startling. A hand lifted your chin in a flash, sombre grey trained on your slightly sorrowful eyes and he scowled, fully aware of what was going on inside your head. 

"(F/N), listen to me. Yes, that was fun. Allowed me to be a bit of a stalker, do something I wouldn't normally entertain. But this," he continued, gesturing between the pair of you. "This is infinitely better. I get to wake up with you every morning, touch you, talk in person. So no, I don't miss it at all now that I know what I can have instead." You nodded, gulping back the fears which were quickly evaporating thanks to such an obviously meaningful answer, one which carried on in the quiet house. "I never want to be hundreds of miles apart again." 

"Me neither." The obvious issue lay starkly in front of you, threatening to become a discussion but Levi didn't let it get that far, changing the theme in a second for both of your sakes. 

"Tomorrow we can tick another thing off the list."

"Oh?"

"Cooking. Properly. I have much to teach you, rookie."

"Is that right?"

Laughing, you retaliated with jabs to his sides, attempting to tickle your way out of the challenge but failing miserably, ending up pinned down on your back with a body against yours, a rather welcome result. 

"Yea, that's right." His whisper was barely there, noses touching and lips were pressed to your own, passionate kiss signalling the start of a way to dismiss parallel concerns, desire overcoming trepidation in a sea of lust as you twined together, became one again and gave into the shared hunger. As palms caressed and clothes were removed, all the dark thoughts flew away like retreating rain clouds, virtual sky clear and full of nothing but sunshine now, two people connected and living each day as it came - there was nothing else you could do but enjoy one another during the remaining weeks, and you intended to make the most of it.


	23. Fading Dreams

Music played quietly in the background, accompanied by the melody of cooking, an array of pots sizzling away whilst chopping noises laid down an imperfect beat, knives working swiftly. A high stool from the breakfast bar had been pulled over before commencing but you'd opted not to use it, choosing instead to lean and let your upper body take the strain. Levi kept glancing over from his work, pauses in the dicing process taken as he observed your most upright position to date, one elbow used on the counter however he believed you'd be fine without it, keeping the prop as a comfort blanket or out of uncertainty. 

In a bold move, your lover decided to put you to the test once more, catch you unawares because that was when the best results often came and he lifted a tomato, round item perfectly formed for use as a missile. 

As your recipe came together, you hummed along to the track playing with contentment, warmth from the hob making it feel like a summer's day despite the threatening snow outside. Your tee was nowhere near baggy enough, intense heat begging for a more loose fitting garment but there was no stopping now - you were in the culinary zone. Recalling the microwave meal incident from one of your video chats, you smiled to yourself and concentrated on the task at hand, dead set on proving your ability in the kitchen in front of Levi. 

"(F/N), heads up."

A quick look to one side confirmed the human instinct and you squeaked, palms up to defend against the incoming red bomb, large salad ingredient caught deftly and you scowled, waving the offending weapon in the attacker's general direction whilst pointing in accusation with the other hand. 

"What the fuck? You could have hit me in the face, Levi!"

"You caught it though."

"Yea, but you didn't have to launch it like a baseball!" Nothing came in reply apart from a raised brow and a small nod downwards as Levi stepped to one side, fist on hip, smugness personified and you questioned his posture. "What? What is it?"

"I think we reached phase three."

"Phase three?"

"Believing you can do it, (F/N)." 

You were silent for a moment, bubbling water boiling to your left and you frowned, eyes travelling to where silver ones were still trained and it dawned on you. 

"I…I'm standing on my own..." 

Your voice came out in a whisper, almost as if to say it louder may weaken your muscles and you huffed, a single incredulous laugh signalling the first time you'd been able to do such a thing in weeks. Levi practically swelled with pride, his unorthodox methods producing results again but the sense of achievement was wholly projected onto you, his admiration growing every single second. 

"Yes. Yes you are." Connecting gazes, you forgot all about the tomato and let it carelessly fall to the floor with a small plop, feet moving in what felt like automatic steps, each pace shaky but firm as you closed the gap, stumbling at the end to fall into Levi's open arms, face in his neck as his mumbled words came from behind your hair. "I knew you could."

"I did it Levi…I actually did it."

"Hey." He drew back, holding you out and fixing a serious stare into (e/c) pools. "Don't sound so fucking shocked. The minute you start to doubt, that's when the shit hits the fan. So (F/N), never doubt yourself again. Ok?"

"Ok." You grinned, sniffing away a tear of achievement and still standing independently, flushed features turning playful. "Bit of a gamble though. What if I'd ended up with a face full of tomato? Or on the floor?"

"Like I said, I knew you could. You were leaning on the side but you didn't need it. I could tell." 

"How?"

"Posture. Weight on your legs, not your arm. Now stop questioning my fucking skills and get back to work." He leant in, meaningful kiss shared that could have lingered longer if it weren't for the sound of hissing steam from the cooker. Hands roamed briefly, squeezed and explored until an urgent splash signalled a pan boiling over. "Shit. Sort that out."

"Am I your assistant now, Levi?"

"Well, yea. I'm teaching you, right?"

"You're lucky I love you." 

It came out fluidly, no chance to think things through and worry about voicing your emotions correctly, a heartfelt and honest admission that hung thickly in the air with tangible weight. Levi's lip twitched into a sideways smirk, head down as he tended to the remaining tomatoes with a nod and a quiet mutter.

"Yea. I am lucky."

~~~~~~

Dinner had been a triumph, full bellies and satisfied appetites a testament to your combined efforts and the two of you currently sat wrapped in a blanket, Levi behind and leaning on the bed as you relaxed back into his body. The rug you sat upon was fluffy and comfortable, just how you'd imagined it to be when first seeing the man's open hearth on screen. Fire crackled and whiskey was sipped, a calm and cosy end to the day and you looked to one side, window panes revealing the first flurries of snow that fell outside. In here though you were safe, warm and toasty and Levi's hug tightened around you, a sigh of peace mirroring your emotions. 

"It's perfect."

"What is, (F/N)?" 

"Everything. Dinner, the fire, the snow, you. Everything."

"So, your ultimate date then?" 

"I would say so, yes." 

"Good. I can tick that off."

"Tick it off?" You turned slightly in the embrace, sidelong glance querying his comment and a tiny smile stared back, tired eyes glossing over as the serenity worked it's magic.

"Yea. My list."

"You actually have a list?"

"Of course. I couldn't bring you here with no itinerary. How disorganised would that be?" 

You couldn't tell if he was serious or not, the gleaming steel still present despite fatigue but then he rose, leaving you alone with the blanket as he fetched a note from the night stand. It was tatty, evidently well handled however you hadn't even been here a week - how was it so worn already? 

"Did you use scrap paper?"

"No. I've been writing on this for a while." 

Levi felt a pang of nerves as he joined you again on the rug, facing one another now and you scooped the cover round to your right, flapping it over so he could have some too. Once comfortable, he took a deep breath and passed his list over, one added to over time with different inks, an ongoing collection of things to do. As you scanned the words, Levi watched closely for any sign of your thoughts however none were evident, just the concentration of quiet reading. 

Particular suggestions jumped out at you, ones already achieved and quite rightly marked as complete and with bold annotations.

'- cook (via tablet and in person)  
\- take (F/N) to the top of the village

OBVIOUSLY ASK HER TO FUCKING VISIT FIRST

\- go on a date  
\- read our letters together'

There were more items and you took it all in swiftly, ones which had been added since your arrival, some checked off, others awaiting orders.

'- walk unaided  
\- paddle in the sea  
\- climb a tree  
\- watch the sun set'

They all sounded so simple and pure, his desires scribbled down since early on and you met his slightly anxious stare. 

"Levi...I…this is beautiful."

"It's just my stupid fucking ramblings." 

"No, they're wonderful. Honestly. I'd love to do all of them with you." Hands linked together, fingers twining and you gripped on tightly, alleviating his clear discomfort by lightening the mood. "Paddling in the sea may just freeze our feet off right now." 

"I expect so."

A heaviness descended, one experienced before and you spoke softly and sincerely. 

"We'll do it when it's warmer." 

In just over a month it would still be as wintry, if not more so but you meant it, a promise made that would never be broken, no matter what. 

~~~~~~

Progress had been speedy since your first solo walk two weeks ago and Levi pushed you to the limit daily, mentally as well as physically. A common sight in town was now the pair of you striding up and down the seafront road, one man at the helm and barking orders, arms waving enthusiastically as you did your best to keep up. Whilst far from being able to run, you could manage something of a pace and worked hard, unrelenting and determined to succeed. As the laborious journey continued, your partner shot mathematical equations at you, riddles and posers whilst he moved backwards, eyes on you at all times. He wanted to keep the mind as sharp as the body, exercise every part of your being and had planned another day in the office, task you with more taxing chores to ensure nothing remained untrained. 

Having an absolute slave driver in control of you was good if totally tiring, ensuring a healthy outlook and regardless of your condition, you could tell it was the best shape you'd ever been in, fresh air and intense workouts aiding in your recovery. 

As the end of this lap neared, a vibration in your pocket demanded attention and you didn't break stride, breathlessly calling out the latest answer before picking up the phone. 

"(F/N), no slacking."

"It's…Jean's last…day…"

"Fine. Sit." 

Levi perched on a rock, patting next to him and you lowered down, taking the weight off and connecting with your friend hundreds of miles away.

"Hey Jean!" 

His face appeared on the screen, party hat sitting proudly on his head and cheeks red. 

"(F/N)! Levi! Whatcha doing?" 

"Jean, how much have you had to drink?"

It was past lunchtime, but still too early to be mildly inebriated, especially around machinery and your serious glare cut through the manufactured waves like you were there in the room, Eren taking over. 

"He's ok (F/N). I'm keeping an eye on him, don't worry."

"Be careful. We could do without an industrial accident." Important words done, you moved onto the fun part. "So, did anyone else come down to say goodbye?"

"No, of course not!" The taller male was back and scowling, distaste at the rest of the office clear as he ranted. "Well, a few did come by for envelopes and they just said they didn't know I was even leaving! Can you believe it?!"

"Unfortunately yes. But that's how it goes. You're in your little kingdom there and they ignore you unless it all gets fucked up."

Levi listened to the conversation, similar ones heard in the past but this time it was 'you' not 'we', a significant change in language that you probably weren't aware of - it was as if your old life had been left behind and selfishly, the pale man enjoyed it. 

"Our new guy's here too, (F/N)! Say hello!"

A fearful looking blonde peered at your image, blue eyes wide and terrified beneath a mop of hair and Jean relinquished the phone, Eren's camera work commencing with narration. 

"This is Armin, he's a bit nervous but he'll do fine. Won't you?"

"Umm…yes?"

The man of the hour wrapped his arm around the scared participant and you saw Armin flinch, giving instructions to your friends. 

"Can I talk to him?"

"Sure!" 

Eren had evidently been on the beer as well and the pair handed over the device, slight view showing them dancing off around the mail room to the music that played from their radio. 

"They're going to break shit, (F/N)." 

Levi had leant in and spoke lowly, serious face looming and the younger man jumped again, probably scared of his own shadow. 

"Hi Armin, I'm (F/N) and this is Levi. He's nice really."

"Uh…ok?"

"Listen, don't be worried. Eren will look after you. He's good at what he does and he'll show you the ropes. Just remember that they started as the new guy once, like you. And look at them now, experts!"

He did, features shocked and the phone was turned so you could see exactly what was occurring. After your glowing reference, the couple disproved all of what had just been said as they twirled and laughed, grabbing kisses and using packing wrap as scarves, clear bubbly material coiled around their necks. You sighed and laughed at the same time, speaking to Armin once again. 

"When sober, that is. Enjoy yourself, have fun. The hard stuff starts on Monday."

"I guess so…thanks." 

There was little chance of commencing the previous chat again and you yelled, startling Levi as he winced at the volume. 

"Jean? Sorry I couldn't be there! Have a great last day!"

"Thanks (F/N)! Call you later!" 

After a few fumbles, the new starter seemed to figure out how to end the call and you were left with the sound of the ocean, any snow from a fortnight ago now blown away by marginally warmer weather, waves calm and controlled. 

"Well that's a disaster waiting to fucking happen."

"Yup Levi. Chaos."

"Mmm. Anyway, we have stuff to do." 

"Already?"

"Yes." 

The next part of your schedule was to be completed inside and you made the short walk home, happy that your friend was having a good send off, yet sad you weren't able to attend. Outerwear was dealt with, positions taken up on the couch as legs were tested in the usual way, feet in Levi's hands and you took care not to repeat the kick to the face that had happened before. 

~~~~~~

The next day saw you back in the office, working in harmony with Levi as his steady slicing and stamping joined your pacing back and forth between a cabinet and a desk, invoices tallied and recorded in a book before being packed away for storage off site. It was one of those jobs which your lover put off frequently, a chore which could ultimately wait but needed doing nonetheless, so to have you as an assistant lifted the pressure from his shoulders. You indexed and sorted, filed and catalogued, all the while building yet more strength and using your brain - whoever originally noted the shipping numbers had failed miserably, more than a few missing which meant something of an investigation needed to take place. 

Your morning had been filled with chats, fleeting kisses and lingering looks, small basement just the right size for two people to work closely together. Sure, more space would've been nice from a practical standpoint, but to have the proximity was far more enjoyable. Each time you made the short trip to retrieve more papers, some kind of contact ensued, be it a hand trailing through ebony hair, a tickle to his ear, a squeeze at your ass…it certainly added to the atmosphere and you whistled quietly, random tune proving your feeling of serenity. 

Mike swept in as usual, friendly tone booming out as he put his managerial position to use. 

"And how are the workers today? I could get used to this. (F/N)'s much more efficient than you, Levi."

"Do you want me to piss on your mail? Because I will. One more comment like that and I swear…"

"Levi, Levi. You and your empty threats." The towering male smiled and you thought he winked in your direction, swaying locks making it hard to tell so you grinned back, loving the banter that occurred between them and Levi's dark grumble continued. 

"What the fuck do you want anyway? Come to gloat about how you can actually see the sun? That's right. Sun. It hasn't been out in years and I'm bloody stuck here." 

"And this is why I would like (F/N) to deliver the post upstairs today."

"What?"

Both of you had answered, clank of metal ringing loud as Levi dropped his letter opener on the desk, arms crossed over his chest and body leaning back. You stared, eyes moving from one to the other as Mike basically snatched his friend's freedom from him. 

"They guys like her. She's nice. Try it some time, Levi." 

"Nice? This one? You should hear what she called me yesterday."

"I'm sure it was warranted. Anyway, I need to go through some things with you so I'll be keeping you company." Your boss for the day lifted the modest stack of incoming mail and held it out to you, large hand easily encompassing the pile that you needed two arms to gather up. 

"I…is…who…?"

"Just pop up, (F/N). They'll show you." 

You shot a look to Levi, feeling like you'd taken his livelihood away however a tiny smirk and a nod confirmed it was all ok. Ascending the stairs carefully, you used a shoulder to keep steady on the wall and reached safe ground, greeted by those above as soon as the door was opened. The men remaining beneath ground shared a glance, hearing the excited chatter and your laughter even through the closed entrance and Levi shook his head. 

"She'll be solving all their personal issues soon, no doubt."

"How so?"

"(F/N) has the innate ability to listen and make people feel better." 

"Talking of feeling better, how are you getting on with that problem?"

"What problem, Mike? The one where she goes home in three weeks?" 

"Yea, that one." He took a seat at the now empty desk you'd been using and fixed his friend with a stare which was not to be ignored.

"It may have corrected itself."

"What do you mean, Levi?"

"(F/N) spoke to Eren and Jean yesterday. Bitching about work. Referred to it as 'you' and 'yours', not 'us' and 'ours' like normal." Levi sighed and nodded slowly, gathering his own thoughts before they spilled out. "And earlier she said she'd like to take a bath when we get home. Home, Mike. Like it's our home."

"And have you actually spoken to her about it?"

"No, of course not."

"Fucking hell, Levi. Grow a pair and talk."

"It's not that easy."

The pair sat in silence, both aware of the pale man's reticence and troubles when expressing himself, both aware that it needed to change if anything was going to be figured out. 

Later that evening as you soaked in the tub, a similar discussion took place whilst Levi cooked downstairs, your phone buzzing on and off as a text conversation with Eren held a familiar theme. 

'Just ask him (F/N)'

'I can't. Can't really say oh hey, can I stay here?!'

'Why not?!'

'How bad does that sound? And I can't ask him to come with me either. He hates the city.'

'You have to though. Pick one option or at least bring it up.'

'I'm scared, Eren.'

'I know. Listen, let me know what happens. I gotta go eat dinner xxx'

'Enjoy. Speak later xxx'

You dropped the device to the floor, careful to place it far enough away and you climbed out, drying off quickly with a knot of fear in your stomach - it seemed so simple, an adult-like sharing of words to solve an issue but to you it felt like fighting a battle, adrenaline and nerves rising to quash any appetite you previously had. Once dressed, slow footsteps plodded down as you joined your lover, his silver gaze catching your eye and you looked away, unable to keep up the contact whilst in turmoil. 

Levi knew something was wrong and dismissed your excuse of fatigue instantly, however he didn't press the point, simply watched in futility as you pushed food around your plate, small bites taken here and there. He wished that he'd been blessed with a sociable mind at times, prayed to suddenly obtain some way to deal with all of this, yet of course it didn't come and the quiet meal continued uninterrupted. 

Any resolve to lay out the real reason for your change in demeanour had vanished, left only with a deep ache and the occasional sharp intake of breath; these were signs of imminent speech, but your mouth couldn't quite form the syllables needed, kept them inside and away from reality. Had someone come to you for help, you'd have a thousand ways to suggest a solution - bring your own need to the table, and you drew a blank. 

Once it became clear that this would remain voiceless, a lacklustre chat ensued around nothing important, strained and awkward exchange doing little to steady your troubled souls and bed time came early, neither of you opening up to the other. 

As you lay staring at the window, Levi cuddled in behind you as always, a tear escaped from an open (e/c) eye, pissed off at yourself for failing to be honest, sure that the man against your skin would get tired of this and decide to cut your visit short. All you had now was self doubt and sleep did not come easy. Similarly, your partner breathed in the smell of fresh shampoo, tried to soothe his problems with your delicious scent, however it didn't work. In his mind you were tiring of him, wanted to return to the city early and get on with your life as it used to be, a thought which squeezed his guts into a tight ball of despair that didn't relent until hours later. 

Steady breaths suggested you had drifted off some time around midnight and Levi leant up on one elbow, brushing hair back from your face as he studied your features, recorded the beauty before him in case it was all cruelly taken away. Deep down he knew you loved him, wouldn't want to go so soon, but the seed had been sown and he frowned, mumbling voice low and dark. 

"Why won't you tell me, (F/N)? Why won't you tell me what's wrong? I love you. Don't leave me. Please."


	24. Goodbye

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I've been trying to get this out for ages but words have not been my friend. Hope you enjoy!

"Why would I ever leave you?"

Levi jumped, fully believing that you were asleep and he closed his lids, emotional plea having been heard after all.

"(F/N)…"

You turned, palm on his cheek and eyes burning in the dim light, a sudden power within that met soft grey, an awkward and apologetic stare close by.

"Levi, I'm sorry. I need to…I need to talk to you."

Here it comes, he thought. The harsh reality about to be laid bare and he matched your hold, hand on your face in an attempt to keep you there for as long as possible.

"Please don't."

"Don't what?"

"(F/N), if you want to go home, I understand but please don't."

"Levi?" The smile on your mouth came from the unexpected request and you shook your head, tiny laugh given as you realised why he looked so unnaturally timid. "That's the thing, I don't want to go back. I want to stay here, but how was I supposed to say that? Invite myself into your life permanently?" You paused, everything about to come out in one huge mess of vocabulary. "I was scared to bring it up because you might not think the same and then we'd be stuck in this awkward situation which we still might be stuck in and then there's my job and…"

"(F/N), shut up." A smirk danced playfully across lips you loved to watch move, relief spreading over handsome features and Levi yelled internally, insanely happy to have discovered the reason for your behaviour and finally in possession of the facts. "You're a fucking idiot."

"Hey! Why?"

"You were worried all this time about the same thing I've been shitting bricks over." He took your hand, tight hold applied as his heart swelled to probable bursting point, a combination of love and excitement replacing what had recently been dread and fear. "I know the logistics could be an issue with your work, but I don't want to think about that right now."

"So you want me to stay?"

Silver eyes rolled and he shook his head against the sheets with an exaggerated sigh, black hair ruffling into an adorably fluffy state and you grinned, waiting for the no doubt offensive response.

"What do you think I just fucking said? Of course I want you to stay. Even if you do annoy the shit out of me."

"Charming."

Equally joyous yet tired faces came together, a soft and delicate kiss to cement the occasion and nothing more, this was born of pure emotion. Levi took a deep, peaceful breath and pulled you close as he rolled back, your head resting on his chest and arms curled lazily around one another. Lids fell, fraught souls now calmed by the passing of a storm and before well earned sleep took over, you were able to murmur a tiny declaration of good night.

~~~~~~

To say you'd buried your heads in the sand would have been unfair - it was an inevitability that soon, you would have to return home one way or another but that didn't mean it had to spoil the time left. The need for an income spelt out your future, days numbered and you cherished every moment, threw yourselves into every little thing with a kind of energy never experienced before. Simple mundane instances became reason to celebrate, your recovery practically complete as Wednesday came to a close, Levi's office the scene of a flurry of activity.

The filing task you'd taken on was nearly finished and you hurried back and forth, wanting to bring this to a neat conclusion before leaving on Friday; bus tickets had been booked, discussions held around the journey and practical steps gone over. There was no way you could think of working here long term - apart from the current chore, this really only amounted to a one man job. Local openings were few and far between, no vacancies anywhere so the depressing truth remained clear. You had to go back.   
Levi watched as you trotted from one place to the next, papers fluttering and legs moving swiftly as if there was a deadline to meet, your face set in a determined kind of frown whilst placing the flimsy invoices in their rightful home. He leant back, pen tapping against slightly pouted lips.

"What's the rush, (F/N)?"

"It needs doing."

"You don't have to do it all yourself."

"The sooner it's done, we can leave."

There was an urgency to your actions, even in your voice and the man tilted his head, confused as to why this sudden need to finish had overcome you. But he left it alone, let you navigate deftly around furniture and instead noted your physical accomplishment, the ease with which you could move now and he found his eyes wandering, gaze travelling down your body in appreciation. It was a rather enjoyable way to pass the afternoon and Levi relaxed, satisfaction on handsome features.

Your haste had a purpose, one undisclosed but you were determined, a goal in mind along with the desire to conclude a job - leaving this half done would eat away at you daily. The last rustle of paper was joined by a jubilant sigh and you closed the box, destination written neatly and correctly on the lid so the storage facility could file it away in order and you turned, hands out and fingers wiggling at Levi.

"What?"

"Come on, Levi. I know you finished an hour ago."

"I'm busy."

"Busy leering at me?"

"I don't know what you mean, (F/N)." He placed his glasses down and smirked, rising to take the coat from his chair as he could see the spark in your eyes - it wasn't mischief but distinct determination, a look he'd become accustomed to over the weeks. There was no arguing with it. "Ok, what's your plan?"

You pulled the zip up high, jacket secured and inwardly praying that the weather hadn't taken a turn for the worst, basement office offering no clues in that regard.

"Just…we need to go."

Levi followed without question, lights flicked off and dark hole plunged again into blackness, a space which used to cause grumbles and irate outbursts yet now held your essence, once bleak working area filled with bright floral scents. As predicted nearly two months ago, you ran upstairs, steps taken swiftly and only a vague burn of pain in your thighs, calf muscles taught and over worked but you ignored it, destination in mind which was time sensitive. Not only was your penultimate day here about to arrive, the predictable switch into night also loomed near so this had to be perfect, no room for errors and the crowd of men in the buzzing upper floor stared and laughed as you flew through the office, feet pounding and raven haired male jogging along in your wake.

"Someone's keen to get home, eh!?"

Mike's suggestive call earned him a deathly glare from grey discs, a gaze which held a sense of both 'fuck off' and 'I have no idea what's going on' and the large manager shook his head, smile wide and shoulders rising with chuckles.

As the now rowdy shipping company was left behind, you allowed a second to adjust to natural light and grabbed Levi's hand, your features so alive and glowing in the soft late afternoon sun, a picture of vitality which left him breathless and dumbfounded, unable to move from the main yard.

"Levi?"

"Mmm?"

"You ok?"

He was standing with his head cocked to one side, glassy stare memorizing the scene to bring into his mind at a later date, the innocent excitement bubbling within you making his heart feel constricted and surely on the verge of utter shutdown. But he kept his cool, parted lips soundlessly mumbling with futile actions until words returned to his repertoire.

"Yea, I'm…yea. Fine."

"Sure?"

"Sure. Now where are we fucking rushing off to, (F/N)?"

"Wait and see."

You gave a tiny squeal, journey continuing as the pair of you ran through the metal gates, puddles from yesterday's downpour splashing up your legs and creating sprays of liquid all around. High winds had banished the clouds, moved any rain onwards and you were left with a relatively clear sky and chilly breeze, skin prickling with the cold but it didn't bother you - there was a mission to complete. Making for a large boulder on the shore, you beat a hasty path and found the perfect seat, rock large enough to fit both people and you took up position, tugging Levi down with a little too much force.

"Watch it. Nearly pulled my arm out the fucking socket."

"Well you shouldn't have trained me so well, Levi." You smiled, leaning in to kiss his cheek sweetly before pointing forwards in the direction of a flawless horizon, calm waters stretching out for miles, a placid sheet of crystal blue which was now becoming tinted with orange and red. "I know I haven't been able to do that much for you and I've been a lot of hard work…"

"(F/N), no you haven't…"

"I need to get this out." Eyes on the ocean, you avoided looking to your side as to face Levi now would undoubtedly result in your vocabulary drying up and withering away like an old autumn leaf, power of speech in danger of crumbling to dust so you took a deep breath, hand holding his tightly and resting on your knee. "What you've done…all of your support and, well, everything...I don't know how to say this without using the banned words, so thank you Levi. You are the most amazing man I've ever met and I know I have to go back but it's not forever. Ok?"

"Ok."

Levi left it at that, simple agreement given as he allowed you to digested your emotions, processing his own too. How you'd gotten to this point was not the usual love story - no eyes meeting across a crowded room, no matches made by an online generator, no 'friends to lovers' situation. From those first few letters, you both knew this was different, a certainty waiting to happen and to have it nearly wrenched from your grasps had only served to create a more fervent bond.

The recent phone call a week ago which could have shattered your worlds also became a reason to grow closer, your boss's reminder that any sick leave was ending coming during a lazy lunch. If you didn't return to work, you would have no job. It was that simple and brutal.

You sighed, content with the lay of the land for now as you had been preparing for the imminent departure mentally, promising yourself and Levi that it was only a temporary measure until something could be figured out. That being said, who knew what you'd be like on the day? Likely a blubbering mess.

The man to your right held his own silent musings, wondering how long it would be before he could call his house your shared home again, how long it would be until his life was made whole again, how much time he could stand to be alone. Levi tutted at nothing in particular, bringing the reverie to an end and he spoke quietly.

"So what are we sitting here for anyway, (F/N)?"

"That."

He followed your raised finger, previously oblivious to what he'd actually been looking at this whole time and gave a tiny wondrous laugh, head shaken slowly whilst pulling you in close with one arm.

"Thanks."

"Well, I at least wanted to help get one thing ticked off the list."

The sunset was vibrant, bathing the scenery in pinks and deeper scarlets, a hint of purple hanging onto the odd low cloud but the most glorious sight came from the sea, every little lap of water highlighted by such a warm palette, sparkling liquid creating shimmers that danced in your eyes. You glanced to one side, watched the other beautiful view as Levi's placid features were bathed in the same rich colours, a sense of peaceful reverence on the handsome facade as his smiling lips moved.

"Thank you, (F/N)."

~~~~~~

"Oh fuck."

Everything had been packed, personal belongings sourced and stowed away safely but yesterday had rather overwhelmed you, the last full twenty four hours together spent mostly in the bedroom and you'd completely neglected to charge your phone, no means of communication for the journey now as the device lay dead on the kitchen counter. Your first bus was due to leave in ten minutes so a last ditch attempt at bringing the item to life would've been futile, useless chunk of plastic shoved in your bag.

Neither of you had spoken about your departure since Wednesday and that continued, no mention this morning over breakfast nor during a final walk around town. Maybe if you didn't utter it out loud, it would go away? A surprise solution could jump out any second? Sighing, you accepted the truth and turned, Levi's grumbles over his stuck zipper making you grin despite the sorrowful occasion as your confession was made.

"My phone's died."

"Well, I made it to yours without texting, (F/N)."

"That's different. That was intentional." The previous lone excursion had been one of chosen radio silence, so to have the six hours ahead with no way to contact Levi filled you with a depressing train of thought - you wouldn't be able to roll over in bed to see him lying there any more, couldn't just start talking or cuddling when the mood took you, none of it. "Sorry, I didn't mean to snap."

"It's understandable." Your lover gave a huff and scanned the area, looking for anything you might have forgotten and he tried to ignore the ball of despair that was knotting in his stomach. He'd been stupid to believe this wasn't ever going to happen, yet had still clung onto the possibility of a miracle. A pay rise. An unexpected inheritance. A shock opening at his place of work that you could fill. But of course that only ever occurred in fairy tales and romantic blockbusters, not this shitty little village in the middle of nowhere, so he sucked it up and behaved like an adult. "Got everything?"

"Yea, I think so." You shuffled on the spot, delaying actually having to leave and a tiny idea popped into your head, playful smirk not what Levi had banked on seeing. "If I left anything, you can always mail it to me."

The pair of you stood in silence, ticking clock the only sound as smiles spread across your faces, light laughter then joining the steady clunks of intricate machinery and cogs.

"I certainly will, (F/N). Not courier though. I can still smell that guy's fucking body odour."

The light hearted exodus alleviated the upset somewhat and as Levi locked up, you refrained from looking back, not wanting to catch a glimpse of what had been your home for five weeks. No other members of the community were around, all staying away as they knew what today was; a private farewell. Quiet streets were walked through hand in hand, your mobility infinitely different to the day you'd arrived and you let the therapeutic noise of waves wash over you, allowed them to provide solace as the bus stop was reached, sunny skies also a polar opposite to the rain storm you'd been met with over a month ago.

Right on schedule, the same rickety bus that delivered you here rounded the corner and approached slowly, shrieking brakes and a hiss of doors signalling that you should climb on board as Levi loaded your luggage, flimsy metal hatch closed and patted once for some kind of random luck. The driver stayed neutral, no greetings or cheery tales this time and you waved weakly, all strength leaving your muscles as if you were back to square one again. You'd thought of things to say, however to be standing here facing the man you loved in this situation rendered you incapable of coherence and your bottom lip began to quiver, all bravery and courage lost so you instead threw yourself into his arms, tears staining the dark coat he wore.

Levi squeezed you tight, eyes closed and a hand on the back of your head as he tried to soak up your presence before it disappeared, the hitching form in his embrace ripping his heart into pieces - your sorrow magnified his own, broke him down and to avoid a similar display to yours, he bit his tongue hard, tasting blood and hanging on to that as a link to the sane world.

An apologetic cough came from the bus and you sniffed, breaths erratic and lashes wet as you leant back, taking in the distraught grey discs that swam with moisture. Talking would result in cataclysmic mental destruction so you pressed your lips together, nodding slowly and conveying everything you wanted to say. Levi understood, mirroring your actions with an equally tight line where his mouth lay while soundless conversations passed between you.

_'I'll be back, I promise'_

_'I know. Don't be long'_

_'I won't…I love you'_

_'I love you too'_

Recovering from a coma now seemed like a fucking day trip to Disney Land, a pleasant experience compared to this and you found yourself unable to let go, grip solidly holding to Levi's jacket and throat closing with anguish. A miniscule wretched squeak came out from what seemed to be your soul and you grit your teeth, jaw clenching rhythmically as you spun quickly, running onto the likely dangerous vehicle and you flopped into a badly upholstered seat, head down, hands wringing and life in tatters.

The bus pulled away with a choke and grinding of gears, old machinery stuttering along the empty street to take you to the connection point not far from here and Levi stared, burning a hole in the back window with piercing silver eyes and a bleak disposition. He remained there a while longer, just glaring up the road with fists balled by his side and a slumped posture, wondering what the fuck he was going to do now.

Nearly an hour passed by and the man with a mind currently as dark as his hair sipped at bourbon, caring less for the early afternoon hour. He still had his coat and shoes on, no desire to attempt normality and opted to mutter to himself in the eerily empty house.

"Fuck this. Fucking bullshit. I should've tried harder. Made Mike give her a job. Fuck."

Slamming the glass down, Levi looked to the ceiling and gave a low moan, more afraid of this than when you'd been laid in that hospital bed.

You were unaware of what was going on miles behind as more comfortable coach pulled into a stand, the third so far on this second leg of the trip and an announcement rang over the speakers - to regulate service and stick to schedule, a ten minute stay here would ensue.

"Wherever 'here' fucking is. What am I even doing?"

Griping with a low voice, you shifted round to look outside from where you sat in the back row, eyes puffy and the odd wave of sobs still affecting you. 'Here' turned out to be something of an industrial area, large retail outlets and neighbouring warehouses, no civilian life to be seen apart from the huge array of businesses. One in particular stood out, more specifically a huge yellow banner and you checked the time on the electronic display hanging from the bus shelter - just over an hour since the most horrific parting had taken place. You straightened, ideas coming thick and fast in a blur of potential which made the blood thump through your veins, adrenaline coursing strongly as you tried to make the most of the ten minute pause.

By the time the engine was started up again, you were on your feet, sidestepping down the aisle to speak with the driver.

Levi had made it to his bedroom, shoes off as he lay back in contemplation, phone by his side now gratefully inactive. Mike had been sending message after message, asking how he was, did he need company, help, anything…it all came from friendship, however the pale man preferred to be on his own for the moment, no solid trail of thoughts, just a big mess of regret and sadness. Grey, red-lined eyes looked at the clock, noting that approximately three and a half hours had elapsed since you'd gone and he mentally pictured your location on an internal map, gauging that the half way mark had been reached by now and hoping your journey was uneventful.

Mike's last message had been a threat to visit, so when a loud and insistent knock sounded out from downstairs, Levi knew exactly who it was. With a sigh and distinct lack of effort, he managed to drag himself up to answer the door, clothes dishevelled, hair a mess and face likely still lined with the ghosts of tears but he couldn't be bothered to rectify anything - his large companion had seen him looking much worse after a night out.

Lazy steps took him to the front entrance and he vaguely noticed that the rain had started up again, heavy downpour coming in sheets of pelting water so a little extra effort was made, not wanting a bedraggled Mike to start dripping all over the floor. Ready to have a no doubt painful heart to heart, Levi turned the handle and pulled, frown instantly forming on his brows as he tried to process the strange sight on the doorstep. 


	25. A Different Journey

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I have had the worst verbal constipation ever but I finally broke through, hope you enjoy the latest chapter!

Levi was filled with a variety of emotions all at once - confusion and surprise mostly, along with the added bonuses of amusement and relief. He stood unmoving, door handle still in his loose grasp as wide eyes and an even wider grin stared back at him, wholly unexpected visitor on his plain welcome mat.

You were dripping wet from the rain, hair stuck to your head and clothing saturated, luggage on wheels plastered with leaves and mud. The most inexplicable thing was the large yellow plastic item you held under one arm, writing too big to make out on the cylindrical object and all he could do was gape, overjoyed at your return yet totally baffled as to the reasoning and your physical appearance.

"(F/N)?" His voice came out in a whisper, hoarse croak the only thing Levi was able to muster. "What…? What's going on?" 

"I think I've solved our problem."

"How? I mean…fuck it." 

Your lover stepped out to embrace you, fierce hug transferring moisture to his shirt but he couldn't give a shit, was simply ecstatic to have you back. You laughed into his messy hair, guessing Levi had spent a good amount of time in bed judging by the fuzzy quality to him and you held on tight, tube dropped with a hollow thud. This was where you belonged, pressed against the man's warm body and not hundreds of miles away. Heads nudged gently together, turning slightly until lips could find their counterparts as an emotional and impassioned kiss began, slow movements sending each of you into what seemed like an eternal bliss. 

After a few minutes Levi snapped out of it, put you at arm's length as if in disbelief, silver stare scanning every visible part of you as his inimitable personality broke through. 

"Why are you fucking drenched and covered in half a forest?" 

"I walked."

"You…you walked? From where?"

"Levi, can I come in please?" 

"Shit." 

He hurried you inside and away from the storm, need for answers having overtaken common sense and you peeled the sodden coat off, suitcase and new found possession placed carefully on the mat along with your shoes, figure shivering and shaking yet smile still broad. You spoke rapidly, teeth chattering whilst Levi led you upstairs to fetch a towel and some of his clothes, your story spilling out in frozen stutters. 

"So I got to that t-t-town an hour away and...and…then-n-n we had to s-s-stop and-d-d…"

"(F/N)? I can wait. Let's get you sorted first."

"Th-thanks." 

He carefully helped you get dried down, large tee and pyjama shorts offered as a better alternative to your soggy garments and in no time at all, you were snuggled up on the couch with mugs of cocoa kisses, blanket wrapped around you both whilst the full tale unfolded. 

You'd seen the yellow sign hanging on one particular building, a beacon of light which read 'Now Hiring', smaller print stating available positions and contact details - your interest had been piqued by the vacancies within a mailing centre, the new company obviously starting up from scratch and requiring all of the basic staff to begin trading. As much as Eren and you griped about it, the honest truth was that if a mail room didn't exist, a business wouldn't function so to have the support areas set up first made sense. As you chatted with animation, Levi smirked from behind the china mug and listened to your narrative. 

"I could take the bus, an hour there and an hour back isn't too bad. People do much more." You took a sip before continuing, rich tasting tea helping to return you to a warmer place and thaw you out. "That is if they want me. But I have experience, practically managed those guys because no one gave a shit about us down there. I could run it with my eyes closed." The perhaps rash decision to leave the coach was one built on a foundation of love, all of the ins and outs considered just briefly so you were sure there would be pitfalls, holes in your plans…however it had been the right move. You knew it. 

Levi nodded in agreement, your speedy work in his office standing as a testament to how committed you could be, but his questions lay elsewhere, not with the technicalities. 

"So you brought their sign home?"

"Huh?"

"You got off the bus, went over there and just pulled it down?" 

"Umm…yea." You looked sheepishly at the rolled up plastic and shrugged. "My phone was dead so I couldn't take a picture, I didn't have a pen so I couldn't write the number down."

"Well, that's one way of fucking doing it, (F/N)." 

"I had no choice." 

You held hands under the fluffy cover, both acknowledging the truth - you really didn't have a choice. A future where you'd actually reached home seemed so unreal and incorrect that imagining it drew a blank, neither of you willing to accept that the earlier farewell had any chance of being your destiny. Levi finished his tea, cup placed on the coffee table next to your already empty one and he sat back, pulling the blanket further upwards as your shaking still came in waves, brow raised in question as he spoke. 

"Explain the walking home, (F/N). Stealing banners is one thing, covering that much ground is another." 

"I didn't have to wait long for the coach back but then I got to the shelter outside town and realised it could be a year before that dodgy bus turned up, so I walked."

"In the driving rain?"

"Yup."

"All this way?"

"Uh huh." You turned, head to one side. "Like I said, I had no choice." 

Neither of you moved for a moment, simply sat with gazes locked in understanding. If snow was falling, you'd have done the same, crawled if needs be and Levi nodded slowly, honoured to be worth such effort yet unable to find the words to continue.

"So…"

He looked down, awkwardly picking at nothing and you had a sudden rush of panic, heart dropping to what felt like your feet as any self assurance was chased away instantly. 

"I…I could still go, I mean…I don't want to impose…" 

"You dare leave again and I'll hunt you down, (F/N). I should never have let you walk out of that fucking door." 

The unusually fervent response came coupled with an almost painful squeeze of your hand, emotion portrayed physically and you blinked heavily, agreeing that any uncertainty over this would cease. Levi leant in, your face cupped in his soft hands as he let actions do the rest of the talking, mouths pressed strongly together in a show of pure loving need. Rain hammered against the window outside while lips became more urgent, your body gently laid down on the couch as the man followed, palms pushing up underneath the oversized top to feel everything he possibly could, ecstatic to have you back in his arms, and for good this time. 

Levi tugged impatiently at the pyjama shorts you wore, swept the loose fabric away as you worked quickly at his jeans, no time left in the world it seemed and you were both swiftly bare from the waist down, too caught up to worry about the rest of your garments. 

"Shit…(F/N)…I missed you."

As tongues hungrily twined together to the sound of urgent moans and sighs, you pushed up against his solid erection, seeing no stupidity in the declaration of absence despite the relatively short time apart - the farewell had not been a happy one, more of a forced situation which held no joy, and therefore emotions were polarised somewhat. 

"I'm never…going…anywhere again Levi…I promise…"

"You'd better fucking not…"

His threat was followed by light laughter, the sound muted by the ever increasing kiss and you wrapped your legs around his warm body, ankles linked and posture just begging to be taken, fingers rubbing against his short undercut. 

"(F/N) I can't wait…I need you…"

Rather than respond with a cheesy line or a whispered and seductive attempt, you instead reached down and gently guided him, the pair of you connected once more in this display of love and devotion. No speaking took place, words left for another time as your hearts did all the talking, bodies moving together in perfect sync as if made for one another. It was as if you'd been apart for weeks not days, a distinct desire burning within you both as breaths combined to create a desperate harmony, your clutches holding each other tight to keep from losing contact. 

Levi cradled the back of your neck, thumbs planted either side of your face as he gazed down in awe, parted lips releasing small huffs with each powerful yet slow thrust, the feel of your fingers pressing in at his spine sending waves across warm skin. He had never imagined being this close to another human, new experiences learnt every day as your lover gave in to the joyous inevitability that was his life now - no longer would he be alone or caught up in a fleeting and shallow relationship. You were here, providing tranquillity to a once troubled heart. 

As low moans and airy sighs joined the crescendo of a building storm outside, you lost any track of time or space, became nothing but flesh and bones that existed for one reason - Levi. After all you'd been through, the highs and lows, the recovery and your ultimate day of departure…you were right where you should be, a fact which could never be dispelled and you would live by for the rest of your days. 

Calm silver pools were locked onto similarly serene (e/c), the hold you had on each other increasing in ferocity as your worlds collided once more, two people destined to remain together despite the universe acting with spiteful fate against this truth. But you wouldn't surrender, not today, not tomorrow, not ever. 

"Levi…" 

His name fell from your tongue as if it were that of a deity, pure reverence displayed while your bodies acted out of instinct, rolling against one another in a swiftly quickening speed and you reached up, hands run through onyx strands to push Levi's hair away from his face, handsome features now revealed and you gripped tight, kept him in view as you intended to do for the foreseeable future. 

"Shit…(F/N) I love you…"

"I love you too Levi…so much…oh god…" 

Nothing more needed to be exchanged just then, widening gazes close and open mouths brushing against one another in a haze of passion. The fog which hung over the ocean seemed to have invaded your home, clouded perception and worries, took away any doubt or fear for what lay ahead and stashed it safely under lock and key to be forgotten as the growing heat within you both prevailed, almost blinding purples creeping into your line of vision for the first time in weeks, an effect that you'd thought had been lost. This once concerning occurrence now held a different meaning, a safe and secure sensation that warmed you even further and Levi noticed a change in your expression, saw utter devotion combined with pleasure and he broke, unable to keep himself from succumbing to the moment. 

"(F/N)…(F/N) yes…" 

The glazed grey above was something you were accustomed to, a look which never failed to send you over the edge and you mumbled randomly, stomach alight and on the verge of providing incredible release. 

"L…Levi…"

Croaking one word, you gasped as unbelievable euphoria turned the room into a vibrant pink, Levi's features perfectly dusted with the same tone and you watched his gratification descend, the pair of you calling out over the thunderous rumbles from the skies above, life and delight fighting against danger and darkness. Everything that had happened over these past months suddenly merged into one singular mass, a sensual veracity which solidified your bond through sexual fulfilment, nothing dirty or taboo about this act - it felt as if you'd been betrothed without speaking it out loud. 

Levi gave a deep groan, one tinged with need as he came strongly, your own orgasm still running through your core and you cried his name weakly, vocal chords forbidding much else as if anything harsher would sully the moment. Nerves tingling, you both slowed and sought each other out, hungry lips joining with soft whimpers and moans, the ultimate connection obtained on this dreary and wet early afternoon. 

After around twenty minutes, you'd finally been able to exist whilst being apart from one another and set about unpacking your case, recently vacated drawers filled again to eliminate their void, meagre belongings stashed away over the space of an hour. Small smiles and fleeting touches were shared along with the occasional giggle about nothing in particular, a perfect day attained that had started out so morose. You stowed the final pair of socks and sighed, stretching to relieve the vague ache which still came from being on your feet for too long and an ignored fact surfaced, hand raised to your mouth in shock. 

"Oh fuck."

"What is it, (F/N)?"

"I need to call my boss! And Eren!" The coach wouldn't have made it to the destination yet but your friend would be getting ready to meet you no doubt, his offer for assistance after the long trip having been gratefully accepted. "And my phone's still dead, jesus…" 

"Use mine."

"I don't know the numbers, Levi."

"Plug yours in, then. Won't take long."

"True."

You scurried downstairs to where you'd last seen the useless device, the outside world now bathed in blackness due to squally clouds and you nodded, glad to be safe and secure. As predicted, not much time was needed to obtain enough power to make calls and you went for your manager first, an awkward conversation on the cards. 

Levi waited in the bedroom, fussing about with sheets and blankets, wooden furniture run over with a finger tip to gauge dust levels and he paced the small area, bare feet scrunching up in the rug when he paused a moment to enjoy the sensation. Your voice was vaguely audible but he could tell it was a strained discussion, tone slightly higher than usual and sentences clipped. 

"I hope she's not fucking arguing. You need good references (F/N), stay cool." 

He picked up his short walk again and leant on the windowsill, chin in hands as smoky eyes observed what was visible of the sea, an inky mass that undulated wildly and sent sprays of water in every direction, a rather beautiful scene now that he wasn't standing here on his own. Everything came across differently, pieces of his life that usually incited a grumble seeming so muted or comforting, that sense of being indoors whilst the heavens raged making his soul peaceful and Levi gave a long sigh, your thudding footsteps getting closer as he turned to see a furious scowl, query fired off instantly. 

"Not the best call, I presume?"

"Fucker didn't even know who I was!"

"Eh?"

"Ok, so no one bothered with us down there but still…you'd think he'd at least know our fucking names!"

Levi approached with more than a little trepidation, somewhat affected for drama as he crept forwards slowly, palms out to show he posed no threat to the ball of rage in the room. 

"Steady, (F/N). I'm not the enemy, ok? Don't bite."

You blinked once, confused at first and then you saw the tiny curl of a lip, your lover's cheeky side breaking through when needed, as always, and you slumped, previously taught posture relaxing and fists uncurled. 

"Sorry Levi. It's just…I…he…"

"Have you handed in your notice? Resigned? Told them where to shove it?"

"Yea but…"

"Then does it really matter, (F/N)?"

"It…I…no. No it doesn't." 

Despite the slightly expected apathy from the side of your employer, this was a joyous occasion, one to be celebrated as it signalled the first step of your lives together, a bold move perhaps but one you would make as a couple, through thick and thin, no matter what. 

"Exactly. Now, speak to Eren before he ends up lost in the bus station and then get ready."

"What for?"

"Well (F/N)," he began, arm out in a chivalrous gesture. "Tonight, I'm taking you to dinner."

"Where?" You said it with a smirk, linking into the offered limb with a chuckle as you knew full well that there was nowhere around to visit for a proper meal. "The pub?"

"I wouldn't say pub. More of a journey into a culinary adventure?"

"So the pub, Levi?"

"Yea, pretty much." 

It was fine though, more than adequate and you were in his embrace again, wholly content with your new existence and the associated limits - no fine dining unless a costly taxi could be sourced, a small radius in which to traverse easily, the same faces and scenery every day…it sounded perfect and as you cuddled in tight, the pair of you shared a deep exhale of calm. Duty called however and you drew back, delicate kiss placed on Levi's nose which he wrinkled with mock distaste, a retaliatory slap to your ass as you walked away. 

"Better call Eren."

"Good luck with that, (F/N)."

You weren't sure what to expect as the green button was pressed, floorboards creaking from above to signal Levi was busying himself with mundane chores to give you space and your friend's voice came through loud and clear, extra cheery greeting making your gut wrench in to nervous knots. 

"(F/N)! Where are you? Must be close by now, shall I get down there?"

"Umm, no Eren. I'm nowhere near."

"Oh (F/N), please tell me you didn't get hit by another bus? Actually no, I know you never do things by halves. Monster truck? Airplane?"

"Eren!"

Jean's chiding was harsh, your call likely on speaker and you laughed, tension broken a little by the short muffled denial that followed. You waited for their bickering to end and took a deep breath, ready to face the reaction and letting the tale out in one go. 

"I'm not coming back, I'm staying here, I just quit my job."

"Say what?"

"I got off the bus, Eren." 

Silence trickled through. Five seconds. Six. Ten. Just as you were about to fill the awkward gap, a sly sounding question arose.

"Were you worried that the bus had no phalanges?" 

Struck dumb momentarily, you gaped and made miniscule noises, reference not lost on you but it wasn't the time for joking, serious emotions at play and you found the power of speech quickly. 

"Shut up, Eren. This isn't Friends."

"It was funny though (F/N). Admit it."

"Ok, your timing was immaculate. But honestly…are you mad at me?"

"Mad? Why would I be mad?! This is fantastic!" Eren beamed from ear to ear, grabbing at his boyfriend in glee like a cat clawing a scratching post as he practically salivated over the news, his heart now well and truly aware of what love could do and how to nurture it. "Obviously I'll miss you…ow! WE'LL miss you. But (F/N)! You're too cute. Getting off the bus…it is like a season finale, isn't it?!"

"This doesn't end here, Eren."

The fervour in your tone was unmistakable, a slight crack to the proclamation and the three of you took an introspective pause to collect your thoughts, minds travelling to their own feelings. Once back on track, you chatted briefly about your plans, the progress of Armin and how he couldn't deal with Eren's aggressive relationship with machinery - the poor guy seemed to have been scarred for life following one particular fiery incident with the enveloping machine. It felt good to catch up, hold a breezy conversation with two people so close to you and promises were made to check in again tomorrow; distance meant nothing and you all knew it. You were living proof. 

After ending the call on a high, you bounced upstairs to find Levi rearranging products in the bathroom, bottles inspected and placed in order of frequent use and you smiled, watching the intent stare on his face until the time wasting task was completed. He turned, hands on his waist and steely eyes looking you up and down, his baggy clothes hanging from your form in a wonderfully casual way and he made a decision. 

"Fuck going out in this weather. We'll cook instead. But first, you need to speak to someone else." 

"Who?"

Lifted further by the recent chatter, you frowned lightly and failed to understand what had been missed, all bases covered and Levi shook his head, finger pointing to the lower floor. 

"You remember? That hideous yellow sign in the front room?"

"Oh! Oh yea!"

You jumped once on the spot, knees immediately unhappy at the sudden jarring movement but hands clapping nonetheless, bright disposition invaded now by anxiety. The job. If you didn't even get an interview, where did that leave things? You'd quit already, currently unemployed and the pressure made itself known, excited adrenaline morphing into borderline fear. One idea had surfaced earlier, a back-up plan of sorts; the pub. It was the only place here that needed staff. You knew how to make a drink, how to keep the patrons happy however that would bring back too many reminders, put you in a position which could lead to the unearthing of depressing thoughts and you weren't ready to face them yet, even after all this time. 

"(F/N)?" Levi dragged you out of a mild panic, flashbacks of drunken customers and inappropriate groping still stark in your mind, memories blatantly etched on your face and he spoke quietly, pose altered to one of understanding. You didn't need to explain, he just knew what was going on in your brain, the recent proximity that had been shared allowing him to see the truth. "You'll be fine. I won't let you do that." 

"But…"

"No. You call that company now and you make them need you." Levi pointed emphatically, marking his comment with strong gestures, passing confidence to you with every jab in the air. "Make them need you like I need you."


	26. Roots

The luckily rainless sky stared down at you in tones of dark grey, an emotionless canopy that bathed your surroundings in its muted colour. Trucks and cars sped past on their way to other places, likely more exciting destinations for some and you looked up at the towering office block before you, the shiny windows reflecting today's weather and fast moving clouds as the wind whipped at your clothes. Given the fact that your potential manager wanted to meet you on the Monday after you'd called, nothing could be done about interview attire other than to borrow from Levi's neighbours. 

So here you stood, petrified of fucking up and wearing a skirt suit that had a decidedly nineties feel about it, sharp angles and probably padded shoulders making you feel like a total idiot. All you could hope for was someone with no eye for fashion. 

Levi had remained in the village, his own work duties calling and you sighed, pulling at the uncomfortable but generously gifted fabric as a million thoughts ran through your mind - what if this didn't happen? What if you said the wrong thing or the company was not for you? What would your parents think of your sudden decision to up roots and settle here because of love? 

"They'd probably laugh but still understand." You spoke to yourself quietly, images flashing past of happy family memories, the way your mum and dad clearly adored one another on those rare occasions you were all together… "Yea. You understand, don't you?" 

Glancing upwards, you paid respects in a traditional manner and gulped back the threatening lump in your throat; a power suit and tear stained cheeks would cement your fate for sure. With a deep breath, you stepped forwards and entered the building, the very edifice which you'd stolen from on Friday. 

The talk of the town was, of course, all about you and Levi and the man of the moment had suffered enough by ten o'clock, his basement office surprisingly well frequented this morning as visitor after visitor entered unannounced, offering congratulations and well wishes. Despite it being all in good spirits, he nevertheless begrudged the sudden influx of bodies in his personal space. 

"Fuckers need to let me do my job. Coming down here and interrupting me. Tch."

"I thought you'd stopped all this talking to yourself, Levi?"

"Piss off, Mike."

"One day, you'll actually be nice to me." Mike smiled regardless and watched his friend sulk, the crossed arms and small pout saying it all as steely eyes glared out from under low dark brows. 

"I'll be nice to you when you get me a lock for that fucking door."

"I can arrange that."

"What? It's that easy?"

"Levi, you forget that I can do whatever I like here. You want a lock, you get a lock."

"Ok." Levi mulled this over, mischief creeping over his features and he tilted his head to the ceiling. "In that case, how about knocking a hole through and getting me a sky light?"

"A lock is one thing. Major building work is another."

"Fine." He sniffed and returned to stoic introspection, papers shuffled needlessly around the desk as his oldest companion spoke once more. 

"Don't worry. She'll do great."

He was worried though, not about your abilities and suitability for the role, but the very real chance that it just wouldn't work out. Levi was about to respond, snap something harsh about not being concerned when his phone rang, your name popping up only twenty minutes after the interview had started. It didn't fill him with confidence and he lifted the device carefully as if handling a poisonous snake. 

"(F/N)? You ok?"

You stood in the fresh air, jaw aching from plastering on a smile constantly and cheeks burning, your brain confused and muddled. 

"I…I think so."

"What do you mean, you think so?"

"Well Levi…that was the most bizarre interview in the whole existence of human kind." 

"How?"

He was sitting bolt upright, teeth clenching together as he tried to imagine what exactly had gone on, why it was so odd and the inevitable outcome. 

"I didn't really say anything. The guy just practically dribbled over my resume the whole time like a fangirl, got really excited and then told me he wasn't offering me the position of mail room assistant."

"What? Why?!"

"Because he wants me to manage the entire department instead."

You paused to let that sink in, an unexpected promotion before even starting to work for them and you allowed a smile to form on your lips, the sound of heavy vehicles booming through the receiver as Levi laughed once, his recent anger turned instantly to pride.

"So when do you start?"

"Two weeks."

He started to shake his head, raven strands swaying whilst Mike looked on with growing joy, sure that the tiny smirk on his friend's face meant good news and Levi spoke quietly, almost in a hissed whisper. 

"I fucking knew it (F/N). I fucking knew it. They'd have been stupid to let you go." The intent was clear and you heard your lover's voice crack ever so slightly, a nearly imperceptible change which you picked up on nonetheless as his words told of personal feelings also. He shifted subjects, aware that an emotional discussion over the phone in front of Mike could never go well and Levi sighed, affecting apathy to return to baseline. "Did they ask why you'd stolen their sign?" 

"Thankfully not. He did mention how I was lucky to see the advert before it got blown away by the storm, though." 

The pair of you smiled, your laughter filling the tiny basement office across the connection as Levi pressed his lips together, keeping the chuckle inside which bubbled up due to happiness and your new employer's oblivious state. Everything seemed to be fitting into place, pieces of the picture that made up a fulfilling existence slotting perfectly to create a masterpiece. 

~~~~~~

"Don't forget your bag, (F/N)." 

"Fuck. Thanks."

The house was a hive of activity, more of Levi's unpaid leave coming into effect as you got ready to go, last minute grabs at personal belongings adding an air of urgency to your departure. Following the successful if brief interview, it had become clear that a fortnight was perhaps cutting it fine in terms of winding up your life back in the city, so much to organise and not enough time; this meant a double effort was required, both of you now preparing to make a long trip to the soulless hub of humanity. Your partner had passed it off as no big deal, simply a sane choice to assist with reducing your ridiculously large umbrella collection, however you knew it meant far more than that. This signalled a greater occurrence, your original plans made possible in an unforseen manner - the next two weeks would be mostly spent at your apartment, loose ends tied up and closed down, final days as a resident also punctuated by trips of nostalgia. You'd be able to make the visits once intended for Levi's sake, only that now it was for you both. 

"Got everything?"

"Think so, Levi. And if I don't, it doesn't matter. We'll be back home soon."

He pulled you sideways into his body, lips grazing your hair and the man sighed, never growing tired of how you referred to this town as your own. 

"True. Right. Let's make a move." 

The door was locked, luggage prepared and you commenced the first part of the journey together, the difference in such an exodus sitting at the fore of your minds. 

Your travels went smoothly, card games played and light discussions held, short naps interspersed with food and chat, a route taken as a couple rather than alone. Upon arriving, the primary goal was to reach your soon to be ex-living quarters, take stock and relax before the arduous task of packing started and as the short cab ride came to an end, you found yourselves staring up at the emotionless facade of the apartment block, bricks stony and void of any feeling. People hurried past, tutting at the two humans blocking their way and mumbling ill concealed insults, individuals whom you were never going to see again. Impersonal. Dull. Blank. This was no longer your home, held no attachments any more and you took Levi's hand, swinging both of your arms slightly with a grim smile. 

"I hate it here." 

He made no comment other than to huff in approval and you strode in, elevator called by the press of a clinical button - even the round and arrowed item aggravated you, seemed offensive somehow and you jabbed it over and over, stress levels increasing with each passing second in the city. 

"Steady, (F/N). You'll break your fucking finger."

The low grumble was soaked in understanding though - Levi felt decidedly itchy in these surroundings, closed in and claustrophobic, yet another reminder of why he'd abandoned this environment and he watched with hooded lids as the doors opened, computerised bell announcing the arrival of your transport. Neither of you spoke on the short ride, just shuffled on the spot and you could not exit quick enough, metal box left behind and keys sourced. You took a sharp intake of breath, sure that your friends had been looking after the place in your absence but nervous all the same, one eye shut as the threshold was breached. 

It was early evening, darkness already descending outside so the open plan living area was bathed in an orange glow from the collection of lights at street level, lack of heating for so long turning the home into a cold and practically refrigerated box. The smell was strange too, stale almost as having no life in here had returned the space to an uninhabited heartless cave. 

"Fuck, it's freezing." 

You dropped your case, hands rubbing together and you were sure each exhale could be seen, boiler flicked on at a switch in the kitchen. The glorious sound of pipes ticking started up along with a rush of water coursing through it's maze of metal to heat the apartment, the thankfully efficient system meaning that it wouldn't be long until the musty scent was burned away and banished to memory. 

Coats still on, you busied yourselves to get some warmth, luggage unpacked and placed in order of requirement whilst Levi flicked through the pile of mail on your dining table, Eren's haphazard stack falling short of his own standards and he separated junk from important, sure that you wouldn't mind such an intrusion. No conversation took place, two troubled minds filled with a variety of anxious thoughts - the bus station had started it all off, soured the mood of your previously jovial day as recollections surfaced, flashbacks experienced of the accident, something which had admittedly brought you closer yet still held a dark kind of gravity within your souls. And now the hustle and bustle downstairs had mixed with the emptiness of your home, a sterile scene that was devoid of a loving touch. 

"Fucking circulars. Why would you even want to buy this shit?"

Levi tossed a leaflet advertising electronic window blinds across the table, paper sliding a little too far and it fell, once fluttering leaves now as dead and dank as the mood in here and you snapped back at him. 

"I dunno, Levi. They must work on some people otherwise no one would bother mailing them." You sniffed once, mouth taught and tongue looking for a fight. "You gonna pick that up?"

"Give me a chance, (F/N). Did you want me to catch it before it hit the fucking floor or something?" 

Your lover stood stiffly, hands raised in sarcastic questioning and lip curling up as he shrugged, incredulous anger flashing through steely eyes. But still you didn't look up, wouldn't chance to see this aggressive stance and although you hated your current behaviour, the depressing arrival here weighed heavily upon you and irate words spilled out before you could stop them. 

"Shouldn't have thrown it in the first place. Stop acting like an idiot." 

"An idiot?" Levi felt it too, a black shroud which became further magnified by the lifeless apartment, his very own discoloured blanket wrapping tightly around strong shoulders to choke the joy out of him. Luckily your partner recognised this for what it was, bit back the rest of his planned retort and shook his head, arms flopping down in defeat and face sorrowful. "(F/N)…listen." 

"What?"

"I know. I understand."

Finally you locked gazes, saw the slumped man by your couch, his long black coat seeming to swallow him up and you gulped hard, this small yet significant argument a first in your relationship, if you didn't count the griping over physio. 

"Levi I…sorry."

"So am I. It's this place, this city, the mindless fuckers out there. It's toxic." Grey discs stared with apology, took in your defeated stance and Levi strode inwards, your body gathered up into his and a hand on the back of your head in a protective cradle as he spoke softly. "I know people argue. It would be stupid to think we never will again. But (F/N), we can't let this shitty environment turn us into bitter twisted fools." 

There wasn't much you could say in reply, his eloquence summing it up perfectly so you just nodded against his chest, clung on tight and vowed to shake off the impending doom that your old existence brought to the fore. 

Organising your belongings took on a lighter feel, the air clearing to provide a happy scene and coats were now off, apartment warming up nicely and you'd turned on some lamps, dispensing with the stark ceiling bulb to give a sense of comfort. The only things you'd brought back were essentials such as cosmetics and medication, the empty plastic bottles confirming that your recovery was practically complete and you made a mental note to contact Hange, get some kind of completion in the form of official paperwork. Food was scarce, however bottles of wine had remained intact and you glanced up as Levi brought you both another glass, taking his position on the floor beside you where you sat surrounded by the last objects. 

"Why did you bring these, (F/N)?" 

A delicate finger pointed at the bundle of letters, all of his own words gathered in one place and you looked up, face open and honest as if the answer was remarkably obvious. 

"They come with me wherever I go. I'm never leaving them behind." 

~~~~~~

Calls had been made to the hospital and landlord, intentions laid bare so now the expected stream of viewings would commence, prospective tenants likely lining up to take advantage of a rare opening in this part of the city - it was a good enough reason to be out and about, let the estate agents do their job whilst you weren't there. The first of many trips was underway, two people walking hand in hand through busy streets but making no effort to rush, yesterday's promise to stay unaffected by the usual rat race still holding strong and you rounded a corner, grand office building looming in red hues of brick. 

"It seems smaller."

"How do you mean, Levi?"

"When you brought me here before it looked fucking huge." Levi stared upwards, eyes narrowed as if facing an adversary and he smiled with spite. "I guess seeing it in the flesh is different." The old law firm still operated from within those walls and the man by your side tugged once, dragging you away by the arm in search of better things. To linger there would surely just bring up bad feelings. 

Instead, you found the coffee shop which had been next on the agenda when you'd taken Levi on a tour via video call, a busy but friendly space in which you now sat, hands being warmed around porcelain mugs of steaming tea. Plans were discussed, the logistics of relocating and what furniture to take - none of it, basically. There wasn't enough room and there wasn't a need, the house by the coast being adequately stocked so a clearance company seemed the best option. 

"Do they just take it all in one go, Levi?"

"Yea, I assume so. Box up your things, get another van to drive it home. Leave the rest."

"Sounds too easy." 

"That's the point. It's what you pay them for, let someone else take the stress." You agreed, sipping deeply at the drink, stomach thanking you for such a treat and Levi raised a brow, incoming comment sure to be an amusing one. "So (F/N). One rule of living with me that you have to obey, ok?"

"I'm not saying 'yes' until I know what it is!"

"Then you can just stay here."

"Levi!" You swatted at his arm, your lover's theatrical flinch making you laugh harder between words. "What's your rule?"

"It's simple, so pay attention because I'm only telling you once."

"I'm listening."

He leant in, a sly conspiring look on handsome features and you giggled, closing the gap to keep up this game. As Levi's mouth opened to deliver what presumably amounted to a rather filthy order, he was cut short, voice stopped instantly as another male tone interrupted your conversation, one which made silver eyes widen and pale skin drain even further. 

"Never thought I'd see you around here again, Ackerman. You got a death wish or something?" 

The one addressed sat still, unable to vocalise correctly so all he could do was turn slowly to face the person he so desperately hoped was someone else. But of course, it wasn't.


	27. Hostility

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry xmas and happy new year, my lovelies! Finally got this one finished, hope you enjoy :)

The air ran cold as if you were sitting outside, any warmth from your tea now gone as icy accusation and tension crackled like an electric storm was on the way, the hairs on your neck prickling whilst two men stared each other down, your lover on his feet and glaring into the eyes of whoever had approached the table. He was much older, bald head and weathered skin suggesting time spent doing a testing job out in the elements and his ruddy complexion screamed alcohol abuse. What worried you wasn't how Levi clenched his fists or the determination in his gaze, no. What was really concerning lay in the other man's watery orbs, a sense of triumph or perhaps glee - whatever the reason, he was certainly enjoying having bumped in to his old acquaintance and he grinned, yellow teeth exposed before speaking. 

"Well? Don't have anything to say, Ackerman?"

"What could I possibly want to say to you?"

"Oh, I dunno. Maybe sorry?" 

"Sorry?! Are you actually kidding me?" 

"You are the one responsible for my son serving years in prison, aren't you?"

It all slotted together, the identity of the unwanted guest now clear and you stared up at the still strangely joyous father who had seen his offspring incarcerated for such heinous crimes. A twitch from his arm distracted you, fingers fiddling at a pocket and you saw a flash of something disturbing, stomach clenching as you realised that this would not just be a simple exchange of words. Levi noted it too, betraying his faster heart beat with a bored exterior and he tutted, ready to make a comment which could backfire horrifically. 

"No Pixis, I'm not responsible. His filthy fucking behaviour is." 

Your lover sat again, hand cradling his tea as if nothing untoward was occurring and he shrugged once to you, unspoken messages sent from dangerous silver - in that moment you both shared knowledge of the situation, the gravity that laid heavily across the coffee shop and the background noise of people going about their days faded into a blur, muted tones creating a buzz of sound akin to an angry swarm of bees. This man apparently had nothing to lose, his threadbare clothing and practically manic golden eyes speaking volumes and as predicted, he dragged a chair up to the table, wooden scrapes piercing into your brain which you struggled not to flinch against. 

"Well. I'm going to need a drink my boy." The eldest of your reluctant trio leant back in his seat, fingers laced across his chest and a broad smile shining out from beneath a rather unruly moustache, one which probably used to be well kept but had suffered over the years. If he hadn't been so sinister looking, the guy could have appeared to be kindly, perhaps once was, yet now he harboured malice and revenge. Levi didn't move, would see hell freeze over before he left you alone in the presence of such an individual and simply ignored the request, sipped at hot liquid and tried to formulate some way out of this - Pixis was clearly in it for the long haul, wouldn't be swayed and was on the wrong side of sanity, a fatal combination which made your situation all the more grave. 

Something made you look up, hands wringing under the table and your scared gaze rested upon sombre blue, the barista staring over with sympathy and a sense of knowledge. You'd been aware of Levi conversing with him upon arrival and they seemed to be old friends, happy to see each other and the slow blink you were treated to sealed your actions. 

"I'll get the drinks."

"(F/N), you don't…"

"I know I don't have to Levi, but we're not going anywhere, are we?"

You spoke particularly harshly, stating the facts in a manner which didn't fit your personality, something which Levi thankfully picked up on. 

"Fine."

"That's a good girl." Pixis chuckled, leaning over towards you and reeking of cheap whiskey. "You try and call for help I'll notice, so don't do anything stupid, beautiful." He took your hand, claw-like digits digging in to emphasise the point and you pulled away swiftly, skin crawling like a disease had been spread and Levi stiffened, on the verge of saying fuck it and just doing what needed to be done however he kept his cool, jaw clenching with disgust - a show down in a coffee shop with an unhinged man would not go well. 

You couldn't move fast enough, tables bumped against and chairs displaced, mind reeling and trying to figure out how to get out of this mess. Even leaving wouldn't shake him, of that you were sure and you could not risk being followed home or having him see anywhere you frequented. Of course you would no longer be a resident here at the end of next week...but a lot happened in less time. Two other customers were in front, their drinks prepared swiftly and soon your agitated form stood by the counter, cups already being filled. 

"I…I didn't order?"

"I know." A warm smile accompanied the worker's motions, faint laugh and a shake of the head given. "Just laugh back. Pretend we're chit chatting." He appeared trustworthy, strong yet gentle and obviously a kind of friend to Levi so you played along, girlish giggle born from nervous energy sounding far too forced. "Don't look at them. We're simply passing the time of day." The badge he wore named your apparent ally as Erwin, a tall blonde with friendly features and he continued, gesticulating wildly like a full blown conversation was in flow. 

"So what now?"

You nodded and smiled, pointing to flavoured syrup despite not wanting any and Erwin brought it round in a flourish, enthusiastic motions masking his true intent. 

"I've already called the police. Not that they'll be here any time soon." Syrup dispatched, he turned to the next drink and spoke softly. "Levi used to come in every day. We'd talk, share common interests, discuss his work to an extent. I know who that other guy is and I know he's on his last ebbs of sanity. Quite the foe. Keep him here, don't wind him up and make sure Levi gets this cup." 

The man in question hadn't moved, the back of his head in sight if you looked slightly sideways - he would have no idea of this exchange so it stood to reason that Erwin would need to send a signal of sorts and you glanced to the tray, three lattes beautifully crafted with art, one in particular showing a kind of wing. 

"Thank you."

"No need. I just drew in some milk. You have to be patient. And good luck."

A winning smile and swapping of money later and you were back at the table, shaking hands rattling the mugs on their saucers whilst placing drinks in order of requirement, no sign of any recognition on Levi's face. Grey eyes showed the faintest of changes, something only you picked up on and as you sat he stretched out in his chair, seeming relaxed and ready to let this play until the end. 

In reality he was like a duck in water, body calm and collected but under the surface lay an incredibly fervent race of thoughts, his winged coffee surely meaning only one thing - help was on the way. He and Erwin had spoken extensively over the years, the shop owner's creative passion being just one subject matter and he recalled the main symbol the male used to sketch over and over. It stood for freedom in his mind, a tag of sorts that he would add to any work like a signature, Erwin's own brand which reminded him of harder times and the prevalence of good fortune. It was comforting to see, even if he did hate coffee.

Pixis added to his beveridge from a battered flask, unsurprisingly, and you watched as loud slurps were taken, bad manners all par for the course but no less disgusting, his lips wet with laced liquid and pulled into a sneer. Life continued in your orbit, a noisy kind of atmosphere which served to polarize your predicament and you wondered how this may all conclude, an aged voice now adding to the racket in your ears.

"So Levi? I'm sure you can guess that this won't go well for you?"

"How? Are you planning on fucking stabbing me in the middle of a busy café?"

He spoke in that inimitable monotone way as always, lids low and mouth lacking expression, a stone wall to emotion which you had access through; despite appearances, you knew he would be assessing every detail, probably already had nine different plans in their infancy to mull over and you considered joining in, reasoning with the old man…however you kept silent, any skills in solving problems stashed away. This was a wholly new ball game and Pixis took up the conversation again. 

"Why not? I have nothing, thanks to you." The coffee disappeared in a final gulp, crockery slammed down in anger. "That boy of mine was everything to me. Everything. And now he's gone." He seemed to struggle, head shaken and the light bounced off his shiny skull, each movement peppered with bright glimmers and Pixis began to grin, unsteady laugher cracking like gun shots. 

"What's so fucking funny?"

Levi's concern grew, had seen enough behaviour like this in the past and he knew that whatever happened next would change the path of this unwelcome reunion.

"It's fate, Levi. Pure and simple. You took what was precious to me. It's only fair I return the favour." 

Erwin saw but could do nothing from his position. Levi saw but couldn't move fast enough. You saw and tried to defend, an instinctive raise of the arm which resulted in white hot pain in your flesh, burning steel slicing easily through fabric and skin alike, vivid red spotting on your top instantly. Those around you saw, predictable reaction spreading throughout the coffee shop - in the city you learnt to ignore other people's disputes, remove yourself from danger and perhaps take a picture once at a safe distance, so you were unsurprised to note an instant emptiness around your table, everyone shifting further away and no one making an important call. 

It all went down so fast that you had time only to blink once, realised that Pixis had made a lunge for you and failed so you reacted swiftly, grabbing at the knife with your right hand to eliminate further injury. In what seemed like slow motion, Levi jumped over the table, felling the older man easily as you grasped the blade, more of the same agony shooting through your palm but it didn't matter, a small price to pay when you looked down. Your lover had his adversary pinned to the floor face first, arms wrenched behind his back and the dark haired male bent low, hissing in a waiting ear as Pixis struggled with futility. 

"You'll pay for that. I fucking swear on my life Pixis. No one hurts (F/N). No one." He wrenched his already tight grip, a sickening snap ringing out and your assailant wailed in pain, upper limb broken with what seemed to be little effort and Levi spoke again, Erwin now bounding over with a phone pressed to his face, urgent pleas to the local law enforcement sounding a million miles away. "Shall I do the other one? Hmm? Give you a matching fucking pair, you shit?" 

You could have said his name, pleaded for Levi to have mercy but a shameful pang of emotion kicked in, something you swore you would never admit to and on recalling it in later years you'd tell yourself it was a moment of madness or the effects of being in this godforsaken city, yet at that precise time you didn't want him to stop. Here was a person who would fight, potentially risk charges of assault, all for you…it was selfish and insane, an embarrassing thing to feel however you couldn't help it, simply watched as the now dull throbbing in your own arm made you wish more upon the one who had inflicted it. 

Reason prevailed in the form of the police, three men suddenly available to assist and they rushed through the practically silent building, mere whispers snaking through the tension whilst onlookers gave their quiet and judgemental opinions. Luckily they were all too aware of who was to blame, Erwin's hurried account adding to the list of Pixis' minor felonies along with his family ties and they treated Levi with care, lifting his tight frame away and mumbling words of encouragement; it was over, they had the culprit now, it would be ok, all placating sounds that pulled your partner into the real world. 

Levi glared, heart thumping from behind his ribs and the cloud dispersed, utter hatred clearing to allow him to see the truth. 

"(F/N)." He took the knife from your bloodied fist, passing it absent mindedly to the official by his side and he cradled you arm gently, silver eyes sorrowful and miles away from the feral look he wore recently. "Fuck. Are you ok?"

"Yea…yea I don't think it's deep." Everything else was still muffled, no one existing despite the sudden activity and you locked gazes, mumbled confession spilling out to betray your oath. "I wanted you to."

"Huh?"

"I wanted you to hurt him."

Rather than act with disgust or total abhorrence, Levi hugged you close, voice steady and pure. 

"That's ok. Fucker deserved it and more." 

He understood. Complete devotion had made him do it and the same undying bond had made you feel that way. There was no guilt, no shock, no problems. Just love. 

~~~~~

The eventful afternoon cut your tour short for obvious reasons, statements given and stitches applied, your wounds thankfully superficial as suspected. Two days had passed since the incident, one which you'd spoken about at length and made your peace with - to bring it up time and time again would turn the mood toxic and sour, something neither of you were about to do so it had been processed and filed, committed to remain as a thing of history and you grabbed the roll of tape, another box sealed shut. 

It was early evening, many of your possessions safely packed away already and even more added to the 'not coming' pile, things like furniture earmarked for collection and rehoming. Levi watched as you looked amongst other items, the tiny frown of concentration on your brow causing his stomach to light up with adoration. There was something about that expression which endeared him further, a simple change of features that he imagined you wore whilst writing those letters to him and he smiled, a softness settling in on the often serious face. He sat back on the couch, assistance coming in the form of opinions on certain belongings and despite recent events, Levi felt at peace. This activity only served to add credence to the fact that soon, you'd be going home. Together.


	28. Leave It All Behind

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know. This just refused to be written until now. 
> 
> Thanks to everyone for reading and making this my most popular fic ever, love and hugs xxx

"Eren."

"What? It's in the rules y'know, Levi."

"No it fucking isn't. If you take those boxers off, I'll make you eat them."

Your friend scowled, pouting bottom lip showing his disappointment as he unhooked his thumbs from the elastic waistband, the only one of your small group to be participating in 'strip Jenga.' 

"Fine." 

The brunette stomped off to find his clothes, fallen piece of wood still in one hand as Jean snorted a laugh, watching his boyfriend retrieve each garment in the apartment. It was your last day here, the hour growing later with every passing second and the decision to mark the event indoors had been unanimous - no one wanted to risk a repeat of the incident almost a fortnight ago. 

You smiled at nothing in particular, palms rubbing together to quell the itchy line of healing flesh. A bandage usually covered the red welt, mainly to protect from any infection or unintentional bashes to your injury but it felt nice to let the skin breathe now and again, allow mother nature to do her job and fix you for once. You'd done all the hard work, along with Levi, to recover from the more devastating accident so it only seemed fair that life took care of something. 

Most of the furniture was gone, only a few simple necessities left along with those items you'd be shipping home in the morning. Home. That word no longer applied here and you cast a critical eye over the walls which were now barren, ghosts of your previous life seemingly imbued into the paint in shadowy clouds. The move to this apartment had signalled a change, got you away from the often vile and seedy atmosphere of the strip club and it's neighbouring streets, let you take the steps needed to really take a look and sort yourself out. From that perspective it held comfort and support, yet now you required more. Selfish perhaps, but true. 

Levi kept his glare trained on Eren, making sure the guy did as ordered and got into his clothes. He grumbled quietly to himself, light music in the background masking any sound. 

"This is why I don't live here. Wouldn't catch Mike trying to get his cock out over a game of Jenga." 

He sipped at red wine, legs crossed and body hunched over on the uncomfortable wooden stool, a possession you wanted to bring for sentimental reasons and Levi watched the two men struggle drunkenly to get socks over Eren's feet. His gaze drifted to your position on the floor, the recently habitual scratching of your hand giving another fine example as to why the city was being left behind and he nodded slowly, catching your stare with a smirk. 

That look never ceased to cause your breath to become stuck in your throat, piercing silver shining from beneath low thin brows in a way which screamed desire. Despite having only a bare mattress to sleep on tonight and one thin sheet as a cover, Levi had insisted it would be more than sufficient and you started to understand why when the mischievous glint in his eye became more obvious. 

Having the ability to hold your own in terms of alcohol content paid off once more and you observed the clothing battle to your right, giggles erupting at the ridiculous scene as you stood, stretching out protesting muscles and gaining adequate blood flow again. Whilst you weren't exactly in a position to run a marathon, your recovery was mostly complete apart from the occasional bout of stiffness and pain, all perfectly normal according to Hange whom you'd met with a couple of days prior. The talkative medical professional had discharged you, provided as close to a clean bill of health as possible and made you promise to get in touch should any issues arise. 

All in all, things seemed to moving in the right direction and you smiled, Levi's arm snaking around your waist after the man had materialised as if from nowhere. He spoke softly, breath tickling your ear. 

"(F/N)? How do we get rid of them?" 

His hand moved downwards, gave your ass a little nip and you bit back the need to laugh at his forward behaviour, every passing day seeing his mood improve and outlook brighten. Just like the first evening back, you'd had a few exchanges over the two weeks - nothing heated or serious, only tense and grumpy words that were forgotten easily. To leave this soul-sucking environment couldn't come too soon. 

"Maybe coax them out with the last slice of pizza?"

"I think they're way past the ability to eat." 

You elbowed your lover gently in the ribs, good natured smile given and you raised your voice, addressing the others. 

"Guys? It's getting late." 

"Huh? Ohhh yea…" 

Jean looked at his watch with one eye closed, making the face come into focus and he huffed once in surprise, unsure how the night had progressed so far and he nudged Eren, the brunette totally oblivious to what was going on. 

"What was that for?"

"We gotta go. Mum and Dad say it's past our bedtime." 

"Jean, I didn't say that!"

"Well, don't look like disapproving parents then!" 

You swapped a glance with Levi, his top lip curling slightly to signal incoming speech. 

"If you behave like kids…?" He shrugged with one arm, the other still pressed against you and Levi tilted his head. "And I don't care whose bed you crawl into, just not here. We've got an early fucking start tomorrow." 

"Yea yea." Eren pushed himself up, aided by an equally wobbly Jean and they somehow got to their feet, swaying steps bringing them close like they were walking through mud and the shorter of the pair gave a pathetic kind of mewl. "We're gonna miss you." 

The gravity of what you were doing had seemed heavier as this day approached and in front of you stood the only two reasons to be melancholy. Friends. Of course you would meet new people, harboured an actual desire to keep it merely professional and blend in, but a part of you also craved the community feel of Levi's home town. Previously, having others know your name and your business was unwelcome and often borderline dangerous, however you doubted anyone in the quiet village would be propositioning you for sex. 

Eren's green eyes shimmered from wetness, tears welling that would surely spill at any moment and you swallowed the lump in your throat as strong arms held you tight, Jean joining in to envelop you fully in a hug made of manly sobs. Levi stepped to one side, looking away in boredom; well, forced boredom. He didn't want to see you cry. 

"Hey…I'm not leaving…the country…"

You whispered through chokes and gasps of air, chest hitching uncontrollably as you gave in, surrendered to openly weeping as Eren's muted sounds of woe joined your louder ones. Jean kept it together somehow, teeth grinding harshly together before he calmed down enough to speak.

"We know. You'll visit us, right (F/N)?"

"Of…of course I will."

"You and that killjoy of yours."

"Don't tempt me. That offer of feeding someone their underwear still stands."

Fraught yet relieved laughter followed Levi's utterance and collective sniffs brought an end to the solemn stage of parting, your friends inebriated enough to switch from one emotion to another with ease and Jean grinned, flipping his middle finger to Levi.

"Keep away from my underwear, creep."

"Fucking loser." 

They shared a nod, non-vocal farewell given in the appropriately masculine manner and Eren pinched your cheeks, a little too hard if you were honest and his face loomed close, the smell of alcohol on his breath.

"You be careful, (F/N). We know how clumsy you are now."

"I'll be ok. It's the choice that makes the most sense." 

You were trying to justify leaving them, still unable to help the feeling of guilt but your friend shook his head.

"I know." He smiled, genuine happiness combining with the wet track marks on tanned cheeks and Eren walked warily towards the door, pointing at your lover and relaying a final threat. "Don't make me come all the way over there to hunt you down, Levi."

"Oh, trust me. I'll do everything it takes to keep you far far away, Eren." 

Another mutual display of understanding took place and Jean waved from the hallway, arm slung round his boyfriend's shoulders as they made a slow trip to the elevators. You could hear Eren's echoing protests, dramatic words like 'end of an era' making you wonder if he ever watched any other sitcoms and Levi closed the door, locking up with a sigh. 

"You ok, (F/N)?"

You took a shaky intake of air, pushed it out slowly and smiled. 

"Yea. That could have been way more painful, actually."

"Too true." The onyx haired man held you in his arms, the scent of cedarwood instantly soothing your soul and you hugged back, his hand stroking through (h/c) strands. "Best go get ready for bed. Teeth." 

Given the way he'd looked at you earlier, you were a little surprised at the order but he was right - you had an early start and a massive day ahead of you.

Water ran from the bathroom tap, pooling in the small sink which soon would not be yours anymore, someone else becoming it's owner and you looked down at the plug hole, noted small scratches on the metal which had been so familiar during your residence. You looked up and around, taking in the whole room and seeing things you'd never really paid attention to but instinctively knew were there. Dents by the light cord where it had swung and hit the paint many times. Missing chip from one particular tile. Different shade of white on the wall by the floor after you'd had to cover up an explosion of bleach. 

You wouldn't miss it, not really, however an air of nostalgia had settled in and you couldn't help it, saw the place in a different shade almost as you shut the water off, pyjamas already on and ready for sleep. When you shuffled through to the bedroom, an apparent lack of a certain item made you frown. It was empty apart from your suitcases. With the same confused expression, you entered the living area, features turning into shocked amazement. 

The mattress was in the centre of the space recently occupied by people and candles lay all around, their dim flickers making it seem a million times more romantic. Two glasses of champagne also sat on the floor, lack of table-tops meaning the carpet would have to do and you gaped, Levi's form sitting on the makeshift bed as he patted beside him.

"Where did this all come from?"

"I have ways. And hiding places. Clearing out all of your umbrellas helped." 

You laughed, head shaken as you sat down, leaning into his warm body. The serenity didn't last long, Levi's chest tight as he pushed you lightly to straighten. He knew what he wanted to say, yet it was difficult for him, so very difficult despite needing to get it out and he lay his hands in his lap, head down and face pensive. There hadn't been another individual with whom he felt a pull to be wholly honest to, could feel the ball of nerves growing inside that would only go away with a confession and he snapped his stare up, gripping your hand. 

"(F/N), we've said some things these past couple of weeks. Some horrible things."

"Like telling me to go fuck myself?" 

He saw the humour in your eyes and allowed a tiny smile, retaliation not far behind. 

"I was only responding to you calling me a pompous prick." 

"True." 

"Anyway." Levi sighed, gesturing to the apartment walls. "It's not our fault though. We weren't meant to be here, you and me. We were made for better." 

"Better?"

"Quiet. Peace. A fucking break, not shitty cold callers buzzing every five minutes. I've done it before, but knew when enough was enough." He paused, ready to lay the final point out bare. "Do you know that enough is enough, (F/N)?"

"What?"

"Do you know you want to do this?" 

Uncertainty had filled Levi's heart again and he'd tried to ignore it, pushed it away every time he saw you packing, but this needed addressing. You could tell he was concerned, understood fully too and squeezed his hand, providing some comfort and reassurance. 

"I do know, Levi. Never been so sure of anything else." 

And with that your fates were sealed and future confirmed, a future which was spread out before you like the blank pages of an unwritten novel just waiting to be filled with your story. Levi let out a breath of release and cupped your cheek in one palm, eyes running over everything in adoring scrutiny and he mumbled lowly, lips barely moving. 

"I love you (F/N)."

"I love you too."

"See? We're getting good at all this talking and shit." 

You chuckled, the mood changed as always by Levi's unique personality, one you'd fallen for whilst still just on paper and he drew you closer, mouths brushing together gently. It was the sweetest of kisses, soft and barely there but steeped in emotions, exposing your innermost psyche to one another in the loving embrace. Levi pulled back, shining grey flashing yet again and you raised a brow, sure that you knew what to expect. 

"Good way to say 'bye'?"

"The best way, (F/N)."

Hands were on you, searching and urgent as clothing was discarded in a few frantic seconds, his own dragged away by your similarly quick movements until you were both naked, bodies twined and lips hungry. Because of your accident, anything intensely physical had remained in the form of rehabilitating exercise, sex always falling on the side of gentle but Levi had found an as yet untapped need, something almost feral. 

Tangled limbs and hot flesh were spread across the bare mattress, the orange hue of candlelight dancing over skin as a desperate kiss combined with the low sounds of want and desire, your forms grinding against one another as if it were to be the last time you ever experienced such a moment. 

You didn't dare speak, sure that the addition of words would break the spell so you allowed yourself to be carried along by the tide of lust, palm rubbing against Levi's erection as his fingers played in quick circles between your legs. He moved sideways, mouth now on your neck and breath burning, like a barrier had been broken down inside of him and he moaned, teeth nipping and tongue trailing to devour all he could of you. He wasn't a forceful man, could be rather awkward actually, however with you it was different, easy to lose himself and forget any hardships or troubles even existed. 

"(F/N)…" 

The growling tone set you alight, Levi's voice soaked in passion and you found his lips, nudging his head so the two of you could be connected once again, hands instantly moving to allow him to push inwards with one decisive thrust. He moaned loudly into your mouth, deep kiss intensifying whilst you started as you meant to go on - fast, passionate and urgent. You wrapped your legs around him, held tightly and raised your hips in time with Levi's own desperate motions as he drew back, eyes trained on yours as he leant away, palms on the mattress. 

There was a drive, a want, a requirement to this and you gripped Levi's shoulders, looking up under low lids and panting his name in whispers. He knew you didn't need to be treated like a china doll anymore, were strong and determined enough to hold your own and that fact seemed to have awakened something new. 

You cried out, croaking voice breaking in the nearly empty apartment as incredible pleasure raced over your body, the vision of your partner above making your stomach jump in excitement and Levi bit his bottom lip, groans of effort escaping with each movement and he blinked once, sudden lustful urge taking him over. He loved you, craved you, had to do this. 

Levi grabbed your wrists, throwing your arms down against the white material as he pinned them above your head, not violently but beautifully controlling and you gasped, unexpected action pressing you towards release. Your lover's spontaneous power took you by surprise in a delicious way, mouth working to produce sounds of pure hedonism and Levi nearly broke, steel pinpricks gazing down at the gorgeous woman beneath him. 

"Shit…(F/N)…I'm…"

You whimpered, one word repeated over and over again as Levi caused unbelievable ripples of desire. 

"Yes…yes…yes…"

It became too much, shining flesh melding into one in a delectably heated manner and all other noise blurred into the background, only the rough and ragged breaths which cascaded over your face existed and the edges of visibility grew darker, a bright but heavy blue merging with reality. Levi could see the way you stared upwards at him in complete rapture, the raw and open expression which spoke to him of total trust, one thing that served to spur him onwards, a look never witnessed before. 

Shouts and incomprehendable syllables followed, your aching bodies ready to let go and a flash of magenta crossed your view, head thrown back as your orgasm crashed in, unknown ecstacy punctuated by high pitched tones. Levi felt the shudders, basked in your uncontrollable moment of abandonment and he grit his teeth, succumbing also with strong and eager pounds. 

"(F/N!)"

One word. One name. One everything. 

It took a moment, chests starved of oxygen for a few seconds before you both began to draw air again, heavy gulps and sighs from parted lips and Levi collapsed down, releasing his hold and face buried in your warm neck. You ran shaking finger tips up and down his slick back, felt the shivers you produced with each trail whilst a small chuckle sounded against your skin. 

"I'm sorry." Levi smiled, unseen, nose nuzzling inwards. "I don't…" He couldn't explain what had just happened, or why he did it - this wasn't to say he was actually apologetic, but there seemed a distinct need to speak. He lifted up onto one elbow, chin in one palm as he stroked your cheek softly, mouth now in it's standard position and face flushed as he shrugged. You gave a quiet giggle, squeezing his ass gently. 

"We don't have to analyse it, Levi." 

"I know." A pale digit traced circles, following your jaw line and landing at your chin, tiny tap applied. "I suppose…" 

You understood. The many weeks of frailty and recuperation still stark in your minds, however it wouldn't be your definition, merely a hiccup. A bump in the road. Mischief crossed your features, smirk growing and you pinched again, eliciting a whispery squeak. 

"I'm surprisingly strong. Could've broken free at any time."

"Oh?" Levi matched your smile, leant down to kiss the tip of your nose. "So why didn't you?" 

"You seemed to be enjoying yourself." A raised brow asked for the rest and you laughed. "And so was I." 

The two of you lay together a while, content in one another's embrace as the city bustled around you, final night here spent quietly in contrast to the perpetual busy streets below. In a matter of hours, you'd be leaving this behind to begin a simpler life.


End file.
